by Naomi West
Although I had no sphere of comparison, I was still sure that I had gotten extremely lucky with Archer. He was an incredible lover. At first, he went slow, mastering his own need with extraordinary self-control, then, as I became more accustomed to his girth and his path became slicker and easier, he began to speed up. As I crested yet another orgasm, he stopped, holding me teetering on the edge before ramming home harder than before and pushing me into my hottest climax of the night so far.
And he was far from done. I lost track of time as Archer coaxed me again and again to orgasm, putting his own desire aside to pleasure me, keeping himself in check. Sometimes he was slow and tender, others quick and light, and sometimes he pinned me to the table and thrust into me so roughly that I was forced once again to cover my mouth. I loved it all, every second, every heartbeat. I had dreamed of this moment so often, but I had never dreamed that it might be like this.
Gradually, Archer became more urgent in his movements. He had tremendous control over his fabulous body, but no man could go forever, and I found myself urging him on.
"Do it! Do it! Now!"
He had given me such impossible pleasure tonight, that I wanted to give him the same, and I wanted to ride that rollercoaster one more time myself.
Archer gasped and clutched my ass cheeks, pulling me tightly against him as he buried himself in me one more time. I felt his virile member swell and pulse in my tight sheath. He was coming inside me, and just the thought of it was enough to send me over the top one more glorious time. My head lolled backwards, my mouth hung open in a soundless shriek, and I clasped my strong lover to me. He had not taken my virginity, he had obliterated it in the most perfect way imaginable.
A wash of sensation flowed over and through me, and I found myself suddenly quite emotional in the turbulence of the moment. I had waited a long time for this, and it had been worth the wait. But it felt like a door had been opened, through which I had passed, and life would never be quite the same again.
Chapter Six
Archer
As I recovered from one of the most intense orgasms of my life, I pulled back from Cassidy and saw the tears glistening in her eyes. At first I wondered if I had hurt her, but we had been going for a long while, and there had been no sign of that before. Then, all of a sudden, a whole lot of things seemed to fall into place in my mind. I had been so attracted to Cassidy, so eager for this to happen, even while acknowledging that it probably shouldn't, that I hadn't really been thinking clearly. The things she had been saying and the way she had been behaving, throwing herself at me in such an obvious way, weren't the acts of an experienced girl. They were the acts of a girl who wanted to seem experienced. How tentative she had been at first. How tight she had been when I entered her. And now the tears. A horrible realization came over me.
"Cassidy?"
She looked up at me, wiping tears from her face. "I cry after sex sometimes. Don't know why."
"Was this your first time?"
She looked down for a moment. It was hard to say if she was embarrassed, upset, or what. But when she looked up again, it was with a big grin on her face. "Yeah. Sorry if I misled you a bit, but," the grin widened, "that was incredible! I can't imagine a better way to ..."
"You silly little girl." I pulled out of her and began to get dressed again.
"What?" The look on her face suddenly seemed insecure. "Wasn't it good for you? I mean for me it was ... I just assumed."
"It was fine." I shrugged. It had been a great deal better than fine. It had been sex of an intensity and intimacy that I had never shared with another person, but I wasn't about to tell her that. "It was sex."
"Then ..."
"A girl like you. .." I fought for words. "This isn't how it should happen. You get that moment once in your life, and it shouldn't be with a guy like me in the storage closet of a dive bar!"
"Why not?" Cassidy asked, hotly flushed. "I wanted it to be with you, and I don't care where it happened."
"You wanted it to be with me?" I scoffed sarcastically.
"I like you. You're cool. You don't care what people think."
I picked her clothes up off the floor and threw them at her. "You see what you want to see. You see a bad boy. Which is just the fantasy of a little brat who doesn't know shit about the real world."
"I know more than you ..."
"Do you know what I was doing at your father's?"
Cassidy said nothing, clutching her clothes to her chest like a shield.
"I was going to break in."
"No."
She knew it was true, but didn't want to admit it. That was the trouble with girls like that. They wanted a 'bad boy,' but only to a limited value of 'bad.’ "Yes. He raided a tattoo parlor where I hang out and got hold of a book with my client list in it."
"Client list?"
"People I sell hooch to. People who pay my gang for protection. You know what happens to them if they don't pay?" Cassidy wouldn't meet my gaze. "That's right. They regret it. That's who you just gave your virginity to."
Cassidy looked pouty and defiant. "I still don't regret it."
"That's because you're a dumb kid."
"No, that's because it was amazing."
"Everyone thinks their first time is amazing." That was a lie you could only get away with telling someone as inexperienced as Cassidy. No one thought their first time was amazing. It was usually a horrifying, clumsy mess that neither party much enjoyed. For all that it had been a mistake, I was actually a little proud that I had made Cassidy's first time a bit special. The truth was, she was right. It had been amazing. A virgin had no right to be that good or that natural. But I guess the two of us just fit.
"You don't have to be this, you know," said Cassidy quietly.
"What?"
"I mean, there are jobs you could get. Then maybe you and I could ..."
I laughed out loud. "You think there are employers lining up for ex-gang members? Besides, who says I want to change?"
"But you ..."
"I like what I do."
Cassidy wasn't giving up yet. "Well, I suppose we could still find a way to ..."
"Even if I didn't like what I do," I interrupted her, "I wouldn't be changing it for you."
Cassidy looked hurt. Which was good. She needed to hear this.
"I'm sure this was deep and meaningful for you, because it always is the first time. But it's not my first time, and for me, it was just sex. I'm not saying it wasn't fun, but no more than that. I'm sorry, and if I'd known it was your first, I wouldn't have let you go through with it, but that's the way it is. You're a pretty girl, with a kick-ass body, and, yeah, I might have let myself get a bit carried away because I was hot for you. Put it down to lust. Nothing wrong with lust—as I think we can both testify—but it doesn't last. It burns out. Get your clothes on."
Cassidy listened to all this blank-faced and then, without a word, began to get dressed, pulling her top back over her head and wiggling her little ass back into her panties.
I watched a lot more closely than I should have. The girl really was incredibly sexy. It was not just that she was pretty, hot, or young. There was something else about her—an indefinable quality of sexuality that made me want to throw her to the ground and start again.
But then, even when we were having sex, there had been something more. I had no idea how many women I'd been with. The great thing about casual sex was that you could have a different partner every night of the week and no one worried. It was like how city-types played squash. But, in all those women, I’de never felt anything remotely comparable to what I felt with Cassidy. I didn't think the sex itself was any better than with most girls, but there was something else between us, something that went beyond the physical. I didn't even think that sex could go beyond the physical, but it turned out it could, and when it did, it made the sex like nothing you'd ever known. It was like there was a whole other layer of sex above what I'd been having all these years that I'd never even know
n about. But you needed the right person to unlock it.
What might it be like to be in a relationship with someone like Cassidy? For all that I liked to keep it casual, I'd had a few serious partners (call them girlfriends) over the years, but all of them came from my world. Cassidy had no place there. And yet, while she didn't fit into my world, she strangely did fit me. It wasn't just her physical attributes that attracted me so strongly, I found myself actually rather liking her. She was sharp, and she was funny. God knew she had courage. She stood up to me and to her father. She saw what she wanted, she went after it, and she got it. She might be a kid, but she was a strong one. What might it be like?
Brief. That was what it would be like. She was still Cassidy Dupont, and even if she left her family behind, I would still be dragging this decent girl down into my world. It would destroy her. Given the start I'd had in life, I was always going to end up here. But Cassidy had a chance at a real life, if she could just get past her silly little rebel phase. I wasn't going to rob her of that. Even if a part of me wanted her more than I had ever wanted anything.
Cassidy pushed her skirt down from around her hips where I had pulled it up earlier and smoothed it down into something almost presentable.
"It wasn't just lust, you know."
"Maybe not for you, but ..."
"Not for you either." She looked at me defiantly. "You say what you like, but I know ..."
"It was your first time. You don't know shit."
Cassidy met my gaze. "I may not be sexually experienced, but I am a very experienced liar. You can't fool me, Mr. Cyprian. Shall we go?"
Chapter Seven
Cassidy
I thought I landed a pretty telling final blow there. There was nothing Archer could say that would convince me that this had been nothing but lust-fueled sex.
Actually, that was a lie. I was terrified that it had been nothing but lust-fueled sex, for him at least. For me it had been special. It had been life-changing. It had been ... well there was another word beginning with 'L' that was making its presence felt in my mind. Was I feeling all this just because I was the silly little virgin (now ex-virgin), ready to fall in love with the first man to penetrate her? I didn't want to believe it, and I hoped I sounded more confident than I felt.
Archer said nothing in reply, but shouldered his way past me to the door. The storeroom was in the back of the bar, hopefully insulated against any who might be listening in. As Archer stepped back out into the main bar, I heard someone shout.
"That's him! Don't let him get away."
Archer tensed to run, but, with me behind him, he had no real options. A pair of men I recognized grabbed Archer by the arms.
"Archer Cyprian, I am arresting you on charges of ... Cassidy ...?"
As I looked into my dad's blanched face, all the bad girl drained out of me. He took in my disheveled clothes and mussed hair, glanced back at the closet we had come out of, and jumped to a conclusion that was, of course, one hundred percent right. I looked away. I was used to disappointing my father, but this time I had hurt him.
"Carter." My dad spoke to his deputy in a voice that suggested he was only just holding himself together. "Charge Mr. Cyprian, read him his rights, and then lock him up before I tear that piece of worthless shit limb-from-limb."
Archer said nothing. I think he actually felt guilty this time. He hadn't exactly wanted to do what we had done tonight. I had tricked him a little. He understood why Dad was angry and wasn't going to say anything about it.
Dad clenched his fists, only the most incredible restraint stopping him from using them. "I've got you this time. And the courts will make you pay if I can't."
"Dad ..." I tried to speak up in Archer's defense, but Dad just rounded on me.
"Shut up." He didn't shout, but it was said with such hardness that I obeyed automatically. "Come here." He didn't wait for me to comply, but grabbed my arm and tugged me along behind him as he headed out of the bar.
"Dad, I can walk by myself!"
He said nothing, but his fingers seemed to tighten on my arm, enough to cut off circulation.
"Dad, you're hurting me."
I couldn't be certain, but it sounded like he muttered under his breath, "Now you know what it's like."
He swung open the door of his truck and practically threw me in before getting in himself. Neither of us said anything the whole way home. I couldn't help wondering how much worse this might be if he knew the whole truth. He probably imagined that his rebellious little girl had lost her virginity years ago, probably when she was about twelve. If he had known that it had happened earlier tonight and that it had been lost to Archer Cyprian, I genuinely thought that he would have asked Deputy Carter to step outside so he could kill Archer where he stood.
A little, soft part of me spoke up and said, he cares. He might not always know how best to express it, but he does care.
But the bulk of me was consumed with worry for Archer. He was in trouble because of me. Of course, he would have been in trouble with the law even if he hadn't been caught doing the sheriff's daughter, but he wouldn't have been caught if not for me, and my dad's malice was all the worse because of me. There had to be something I could do to help.
# # #
Back home, Dad's silent treatment continued, but it was a silence that spoke volumes. It said: Go to your room. If you leave this house, then you will regret it. He strode to his office and slammed the door. I knew I had hurt him but, again, there wasn't time to think about that.
"Cass?" Riley came downstairs on hearing the door slam. "What's going on?"
I burst into tears. I hadn't meant to. This wasn't me. This wasn't what rebels were supposed to do. What would Archer think of me if he saw me now? I was proving that I was the silly little girl he had called me, not fit to be a gang leader's woman. Maybe he was right, but I couldn't help it. The whole of the night had rushed in upon me. I had lost my virginity and fallen in love with the man to whom I had so wonderfully lost it, then he had rejected me in the most hurtful terms and had been arrested by my father, whom I had let down and hurt and who had now had his worst suspicions confirmed.
I think he had always imagined I was a whore, but now he had seen evidence of it, and even if that evidence was lying to him, I doubted I could convince him of that. He would never look at me in the same way ever again. And then, there was Riley, understanding and loving as ever. Just when I needed to see a friendly face, my sister was there. And it was more than I could stand.
Up in Riley's room, in between sobs, I managed to pour the whole story out, all except for one detail, of course. For whatever stupid reason, I still needed my sister to see me as a bad girl. I couldn't tell her that the bad girl had still been a virgin at twenty-three.
Riley listened to it all, nodded, and stroked my hair. When it was all told she spoke. "Was this your first time?"
I sat up sharply and stared at my sister in shock. "What?! What? My first ... Why would you think that? I mean you’ve met my boyfriends, and ... What? First time? That's a laugh."
Riley listened to this ridiculous speech with a look of deep sympathy on her face. "Cass, do you really think I didn't know?"
I started crying again. I wasn't sure if it was because of how stupid I felt or because, as it turned out, my sister knew me better than I had imagined. Why was Riley so perfect? Why couldn't I be more like her?
Once I had calmed down a bit, and Riley had gotten us both a cocoa, we talked more sensibly.
"Why him?"
"I love him," I said, simply.
"I'm not sure you do, Cass." Riley shook her head. "There's a lot of emotions going on in there at the moment, and I'm not sure they're leading you the right way."
"Everyone's against him!"
Riley nodded. "And I think that might be your answer. I know that's how you feel—like the whole world is against you. And maybe you saw Archer as a kindred spirit, someone who would understand how you felt. But the thing is, the world isn't r
eally against you. I'm on your side. Dad is, too, in his own way. There are people who love you. No one is out to get you. Whereas there are a lot of people out to get Archer, because he's a criminal."
I stamped my feet, which probably didn't help me look any less like a little girl. "He's innocent until proven guilty!"
Which was true, but, of course, I knew that there was a book somewhere in this house that proved him guilty. And, of course, Archer had told me that he was guilty. I just didn't care.
"I think you can do better, Cass." Riley laid a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Look, I'm glad you lost your virginity to someone you at least think you care about. I'm glad it was a great experience. Mine was thirteen seconds of awkwardness, followed by an apology. It was an important moment in your life, and I'm not trying to detract from that, but ... I think that now you have to move past it. Keep it in your heart and treasure it always, but now you can find a guy who deserves you."
