by P. S. Power
“Hey, um Lois?” He said, sounding like he was worried or something, rather than supremely confident and suave.
The woman smiled at him, a genuine thing that seemed a lot happier than he normally got. Especially on days when people died. For a second he was glad, but then he realized that this was a horrible thing. It meant that something inside Lois had truly broken along the way. She just didn't get sad anymore when people died. Jake kind of wanted to cry, just for that.
Instead he winced and hid behind his arms comically, to fend off the imaginary blows.
“I, uh, kind of just invited thirty extra people to the Christmas party.” He ducked, just in case.
Lois just smiled bigger.
“Oh? Well, that's doable. Do you think you could help with a few things? We need a few large pans and two big pots at least, like the ones we used for canning at harvest? A second kitchen would help too, things are a little crowded in here. You have a whole week, so I know it won't be a problem.”
Ah. Sarcasm. Her voice was warm sounding though. Jake tilted his head from side to side for a minute and then looked at Cam.
“Um, do you think you could take people to and from my place with some food? Maybe we could get into town too and look for some pots and such? I hate to put you out like that, but-”
The girl smiled.
“Yay! I'm useful.” She rubbed her hands together. “Plus I get to see your house, then I can come visit whenever I want, right?”
Sammi glared at her for a second, but smiled and put her hands on her hips.
“Nothing for it, I suppose, but if he's going to start sleeping with young looking women, I totally have dibs... and seniority.”
Lois looked baffled by the words, but didn't say anything, just looking at Jake.
“Well, if we can have an actual second place to work, this might let us get things done. OK, I won't make you skip dinner for a week.”
Yay. Eating.
Of course it had gotten so late they couldn't go to his house that night, but he made plans to go with Cam in the morning.
Secretly.
Just so no one would know to ambush them.
Chapter Twelve
The next few days flew by, work punctuated by more effort and a bit of crazy thrown in just to keep things in balance. That part was provided by Heather, who, now alone, without Randy at least, felt that Jake should be more than willing to take her back. The only problem there was that he'd never actually had her to begin with and psychic or not, meaning well or whatever, he didn't trust her at all. Karen was almost as bad. Not because she was insane, but she kept trying to get Jake alone, to “talk”.
Neither would have been that bad really, except that Jake didn't have a lot of time for anyone at the moment, trying to get everything done as fast as possible. He and Cam spent two days in town, meaning he didn't get much forge work done at all, and then it was decided that all the visiting guests needed to have gifts waiting for them too, or else it would make them look bad.
That meant another trip to the mall, which meant dealing with a small band of looters, who seemed to have the same basic idea they did, and were looking for presents to give their kids. It was just Jake and Cam against two men, both bearded and half wild looking and two thin, but not emaciated women.
It shouldn't have been a problem, and wouldn't have been, except that the first words out of the man in front's mouth was a call to attack.
Since they looked tasty.
They had guns, but fired wildly, without discipline. They rushed with speed that reminded Jake of the super-z. Without that annoying jumping thing they all did. A lot faster than just regular human speed though. And shooting.
So these were the cannibals? Jake laughed at them, which made them all stop in their tracks.
They didn't stop firing though, but called out as they did it.
“Would you like to join up? We eat well and rarely lose our lunch. He he.” The man that spoke had a brown beard and hair, longer than anyone at the House had.
“Plus, we have a sweet girl for Christmas. Do you like raw or cooked? I'm a cooked man myself, a bit of A-one sauce, or a basil rub. Oh, I know, you're thinking “Basil, is he crazy? Everyone knows basil goes with beef, and people are white meat”, but rosemary has been hard to find, so we had to make do.”
The whole time he kept firing, they all did. Jake smiled and called back, going for the same loud voice, since nothing zombified should be there at all.
“Oh? We can get Rosemary.” It was even true, they'd grown a lot of it. “Would you like to consider, no I don't suppose you would. Too bad....”
Behind the man a dark skinned woman, about the same color as Sue but with different features and younger looking stopped shooting.
“What? What do you want us to consider? Heh? What?” Her tone was manic and fast, almost druggy fast, but Jake doubted that. She was just gone mentally. Jake took the time to shoot the first and second man in the head, then the woman behind her as she turned, fast, without waiting to understand anything and started fleeing.
She started shooting again, holding her gun sideways, like a gangster in a movie.
The shot that took her in the head was his fourth one. He looked at Cam who was wide eyed but not hurt in any way and shrugged.
“I was going to ask if they wanted some beef too, but apparently not. So, where were we? Oh wait.” He took the heads quickly. It wouldn't pay to get sloppy, would it? He left them there though. They had a schedule to keep and no tools for carting bodies.
“Ba-Dehist... has it occurred to you that you're nearly as insane for you, as these people were for them? Offering seasonings to cannibals? Really? I'm surprised you didn't offer to share me with them. Young and juicy you know...” She cast a playful look at him, or at least he took it that way.
“What and walk home? It's freezing out there. In here too, so let's hurry.”
In the end they got a lot more than they'd need, but it would let Sammi and some of the others pick for their own groups, so that no one would accidentally be offended. He hoped that would work at least. If they were expected to do more, they'd have to start giving away some of the new women or maybe kids, since that was what they had extra of.
He'd tucked Karen and a full work crew, including Dave, Ken and Sammi in at his house for the day. They were actually doing some baking for the holiday, even though it was early, some kind of traditional Bawdri cookies that were supposed to bring the eater good luck or something like that. That and some other goodies. Jake didn't know all what, since the rest of his day got spent trying to work out a really high quality air cylinder for the gun he wanted to make. It had taken three days to get it ready and when he tested it, it was clear it wasn't even half good enough.
Oh, he'd make the rifle, just to get the skill of it, but this wasn't the high powered thing he wanted. If it was as good as a twenty-two in power, Jake would be pleased, he decided. Well, that's why he wanted to get as much work on it done now, while they still had time. The cannibals had been freaky to say the least. It wasn't lost on him that they'd seemed both insane and completely clear about their environment. Fast too. Like super-z level, which meant strong at about the same level, he figured.
Windigo Sammi had called it once. What had she said? Like crazy strength, but all the time? It had seemed a little over that to him. They moved better than professional sprinters.
Luckily they couldn't shoot for shit.
An army of those would be a pain though. Coming out of the snow, Heather kept saying. In fact she showed up as he thought that, as if on cue.
She looked at what he was working on, just staring at him. Finally he set the small metal trigger in the quenching trough to cool and waved at it.
“I met some of those cannibals you mentioned. Nice people, except for the whole shooting at me while suggesting I join them in their culinary preference.” He'd taken their weapons of course, one was junk, and should have exploded in the man's hand, but the other
s weren't too bad. He wanted to clean them up. For presents.
“Jake?”
“Um, yes?” He sounded amused, which beat enraged he thought.
“Will you be my new partner? Randy has someone else now and I... I can't do it. I know you think I lied to you about sex, picking Randy over you and that, but I didn't. It was... horrible. I like Randy, but all the stuff before, the rapes. I... But I need someone. It's Nate's rule, I... Would you?”
She looked at him, straight in the eyes. Like she had a right to ask him for anything? After all she'd done to him. A thousand things came to mind. No was only the first. The last too. There was no need to be cruel after all. She was nuts, not evil. It made him sad, because at one point he'd thought they could be friends. More than that. Someday at least.
He shook his head slowly, and she kept looking at him, her eyes a cool blue.
“Heather, after everything, don't you think you'd be better off with someone else? It doesn't have to be a man. Just someone to help make sure you can keep things together. Maybe Tipper would do it? She's not a bad person and didn't you and Randy have sex with her? I'm sure if you explained...” He tried to sound positive, but she shook her head sadly.
“No, I need you Jake. I know it isn't fair, but... I need you.”
“But you already made it so that won't happen. Don't you remember?” He knew he sounded a little patronizing, like he was talking to a slow person, an insane one at that.
She made a noise of exasperation.
“Of course I do. God Jake, I'm not crazy or stupid, you try juggling fifteen different reality streams in your head at once. But I've always been there for you. It's my turn now.”
He froze. Her turn?
Wonderful. Jake grinned.
“OK, well in that case you stay here and I'll run in and tell everyone what an evil person you are and how you like sleeping with livestock... Only, no, what you did was still worse. Hmmm. I know, you like baby farm animals. Just stay here while I take care of that, alright?” He said it brightly, happily almost, but it only got him glared at.
“Funny. No, no, don't worry about me, I'm about to be kicked out because of you, and you make jokes. I mean, I get it, I seemed all evil to you and had to be mean to make things work, so, of course you want to lash out now. I suppose gratitude would be too much to ask for. How about some normal human feeling? Did I blame you when you tried to kill me? No. Do you know why? Because I'm not a self-serving person, that's why. Always thinking about you and how I can help you. But fine, no, I get that you don't care about all I've done. I'll just go and offer my behind up to anyone that wants it, no matter what it does to my mind. I only slept with Randy for you in the first place, but I guess that doesn't mean anything to you does it?”
Mean anything to him? Of course it did.
Pain, rejection, a greater darkness than he should have had to face, scorn, ridicule... not to mention embarrassment. Yeah, that was there too. Loss of trust, of almost any hope he had left... It meant all that too him. But it wouldn't help her to hear that. No, she had whatever agenda she had, and couldn't seem to be free of it at all. Nothing he did would change that for her. Not at all. Jake sucked in a large breath and wondered what a real Very Good Man would have done, in his place. One of those happy monks sitting on a mountain top, smiling and sending out compassion to everyone, instead of wondering who to kill next and how to get through the night alone.
Fudge.
He knew, didn't he? There was only one thing he could do. He had to love, even when it hurt. To give, even when people would take without end. To sacrifice himself to protect others from the burden.
Man this job sucked. Why couldn't he have gotten a cool power like Nate? Or Carl. That would be awesome, being all built like that. Lifting trees and having women actually want him, just because he looked impressive.
“OK. I'll do it. Just you know, try not to make my life too horrible, will you?” The words were quick and the second they came out he both wanted to take them back and felt a tremendous relief. It felt like all his anger at her just poured out, leaving only peace.
“What?” Heather frowned at him. “But you didn't... Before, you always said no...”
Jake thought he got the idea, in her visions he'd told her he wouldn't do it. Which he could really understand. After a few seconds he walked over to her and gave her a hug, hoping it wouldn't freak her out. The little issue with attempted murder and all could be a problem. She just hugged him back and started crying.
“I don't understand... How?”
“I'm not a vision Heather. Besides, you said yourself that you were juggling fifteen different realities, sometimes more and sometimes less, right?” He didn't let go of her, she needed a bath, but she also needed him. For some reason. As insane as it sounded. So he was there, that was all.
“Um, yeah. If it's only one or two, it's easy and those always happen, the really complex things, not so much.”
“That's probably the answer, you can only hold so much at once and probably tend to see what you think is going to happen. I know I'd do it that way. You aren't stupid, so what you expect is normally kind of right, close enough, like that building collapse where you and Randy saved Justine. You could see the flaws in the structure, so knew about what would happen. So when you look at me, for whatever reason, you think I'm going to do one kind of thing, only, you see, I'm not who you think I am. Not what you've seen. So you miss whole realms of what I might do.”
The girl shook her head.
“That's stupid Jake. I do know what you are. I've seen what you've done. You're a hero. Every time something happens you save people. Not everyone, but you do what's best in the end. Even if it's hard for you...”
“Except you don't really think it is for me, do you? You don't know how close I am to shattered every time I have to shoot someone for getting too loud. You can't because I try to hide it, even from myself. Or how I wince when I shoot some person I knew once, Back Before. Or what that means. I take the shot and don't hesitate, so I must want to on some level, right? Only I don't. I hate it. I want it to all go away and for someone to hit reset and we could all play a different game. But that's not going to happen, so I try to keep everyone alive I can. Even when it means killing some of them.”
Jake let her go and stood back not knowing if she was going to understand any of what he said at all.
“For instance, I don't know why you keep insisting on doing things so I can't get laid. Will it really end the universe? Other people get to. I mean, sure, no one really wants me, but it's the apocalypse here, you'd think people would settle a bit, you know?” He tried to make his face rueful, then realized he totally didn't know what that looked like. Jake ended up with playful which kind of worked anyway.
The girl shook her head again, making her greasy ponytail bob a bit.
“But Jake... I... You really don't get it? Isn't it clear?” She said it like he was the slow one now. Probably fair, he'd done it to her.
“Nope, if there's a reason here, I'd love to know about it though.”
“Um, Jake... if you slept with anyone and then had to kill them, I don't mean like a zombie, but them, it would destroy you. If that happens we all die. We really can't make it without you. I guess I could find someone that will live, or you know, get you a list. I'll start working on that. I... should have done that before.” She spread her arms wide. “Oops?”
It felt right. Not that he'd thought about it before, but to be that close and then have to kill someone, it really would be hard. Maybe impossible. Well crude.
“So, you've been keeping me from having sex to protect everyone in the House?”
“No... Jake, I did it to protect everyone. In the world. For the rest of time. Without you, we all die. You need to talk to Sammi I think. Cam too maybe. Vickie. They have different stories, but I asked. The Very Good Man at the end of the world. You need to learn what that means.” She moved in and hugged him again, big belly pushing into his crotch
just enough to be distracting.
Jake ended it and stepped back. She'd said she didn't want sex already, that being with Randy was unpleasant. It could be a lie, but if so, no big. Maybe she was just one of those ones he'd have to kill some day and she didn't want him to melt down after?
If so, she was way harder core than he'd thought.
“So? Why don't you tell me what it means instead of dropping that and running off?” Didn't she know that in shows and books when characters dropped something like that they were always going to die, leaving the hero to flounder without needed information?
“Nope. Not my story to tell. I'm just here to keep you alive Jake. I... Just remember that I really like you though, OK? I won't try to set you up anymore. I'll just tell you what has to happen and we can try to fix it together, alright? I don't want you to hate me. Not in the end.”
For a second Jake wondered why nothing could ever just be easy, but that was just life. It had been that way Back Before, and it was now. It probably always would be. Heather spun away and walked out without saying anything until she grabbed the open door frame of the little forge building. It was just plywood so it warped a little when she used it to help her stop.
“So, I can really tell Nate that you said you'd do it? And you mean it? He'll think I'm setting something up probably.” She swung in place by her hand a little, tracing a line with her left foot in the dirt.
“Fine. Just, do what you said, please. I'll talk to him later. Now go. I have to get back to work if I have to be fake virgin father to not one, but two babies.” He grumbled softly as she left.
“How the hell did I wind up doing this?” He'd been there the whole time, but wasn't exactly certain.
Well, whatever. Now he just had to work for four more. Whee. Well, sleep was overrated anyway, right? He'd just have to develop some of that night vision and it would be all cool.
The kids were all getting excited, which meant loud, the night before Christmas. That was normal, natural and also called in a small hoard of shamblers, about forty strong. Jake knew this when Cam popped in next to his bed and started talking fast.
