by S. L. Browne
“I want you to befriend the boy, Magnus, and his stupid grass-chomping pal, Marlo, and accompany them as they travel north to rescue the useless pair I have chained up in my prison. It will be a challenging task. I believe the veggie-brained duo have a new powerful accomplice. Here, put these on. They will protect you from the deep power they emit. I don’t want them turning you into carrot-eating morons.” He handed them two gold pendants. A strange symbol was pressed into the flat gold discs.
“Take your staffs; I’ve had them strengthened. But remember, you aren’t there to kill them, just to make life difficult for them.” The two ruffians nodded and picked up their staffs from the floor where they lay. They felt them throb with new-found energy and they looked impressed. Then the two men put the pendants on and grinned at each other.
“Mission understood,” Vile said, finally. “But how do we get there? There’s snow out there deeper than a T. Rex in places. There’s no way we can travel overland.”
“Hmm…” Murdamond pondered for a moment. His long fingers, covered in rings with jewels of every description, tapped the sleek golden arm of his splendid throne.
“I will send you via my own mode of ancient transportation. You will need to befriend them quickly; the moment you arrive, to be exact, or you might freeze to death.”
Vile and Vicious nodded. They were used to their master’s way. They just did their job and took their reward. There was no job too hard for Vile and Vicious, Manges of the Highest Order.
“Come over here.” Murdamond led them to a curtained room and the three of them stepped inside. The brightly painted walls were adorned with odd gold-leafed symbols that were mysterious even to Vicious and Vile. On the floor in the centre of the room Murdamond drew a strange five-sided shape. He went to a special glass case and took out a book. Its cover was black as night and it shimmered green and purple in the grey winter’s light.
“Step into the pentagon,” he ordered. The men obligingly did as they were told. “Good luck,” Murdamond said; his cold, hard, white face did not flicker with any emotion. Then he muttered some odd words and waved his staff. When he closed the book the men disappeared.
“Master,” came a croaky voice from the chamber beyond. “Here is Wretched and he has the boy’s parents with him.”
Aha! thought Murdamond, a small, spiteful smile appearing in the corner of his thin-lipped mouth. Tormenting them will cheer me up a little bit. And he put the book carefully back into its case and then slipped through the curtain like a yellow python slithering through the long grass towards its prey.
Chapter 2
Marlo ushered them all out into the cold.
“Why do we have to go out?” grumbled Magnus, who’d just got warm for the first time in three days.
“A hatching. The parents want me there in case something goes wrong. I thought you’d like to see it.”
“Ooh, what sort of dinosaur?” Magnus asked, suddenly excited.
“Not a dinosaur,” chuckled Marlo. “One of us.”
“Oh.” Magnus was very excited. He and Em followed Marlo, stumbling and slipping in the ice and frozen snow that seemed to have been there forever. He couldn’t wait for the spring. They could make a start north, fight Murdamond, release his parents and save the worlds.
Marlo took them to a nearby house. Em appeared to be excited too. She skipped from one foot to the other and grinned at him with shining eyes. Everything thrilled Em. Flowers, trees, snow; she’d even been fascinated when Magnus had done an exceptionally loud burp after dinner one day. She had sat in front of him pressing his stomach, trying to make air rush out so she could hear it again. Then she had spent an hour trying to burp herself, to no avail.
The worried parents ushered them into their front room. A soft purple-coloured egg, the size of a beach ball, lay on a bed of soft feathers in front of the fire. It was rocking from side to side and emitting a curious gurgling sound.
“Ah, this is perfectly normal; don’t worry,” Marlo soothed the mother gently. “Watch carefully; it won’t be long now.”
The egg rolled a little more vigorously. It disappeared under the kitchen table, much to the consternation of the father who tried to retrieve it and put it back on the feather nest.
“Leave it,” Marlo said. “The egg knows what it’s doing.”
It rolled again, this time out into the back kitchen, and bashed itself hard against the wall. A slender crack appeared across the full width of the egg and Magnus saw a bright blue eye peeking through. It rolled again, but this time towards his foot, and then it stopped and the eye blinked up at him. The gurgling sound became louder.
“Ooh, look; I think it likes you,” Marlo said to him with a theatrical wink. And then the egg rolled off again and slammed itself against the wall. This time the egg broke open and Em jumped into the air, her eyes wide with the wonder of it all. Magnus was surprised to see a fully-formed baby lying in the shell. Bits of shell were in the baby’s hair. It was clearly a girl.
The mother shrieked and picked up her baby girl and clutched her to her in a tight cuddle. It was a wonderful moment. The baby snuggled into her mother’s warmth and the parents stared at their baby with joy; pure happiness seemed to seep from them. Magnus felt a little tear form in his eye. He thought of his own mum, far away; a prisoner in a cold dungeon. He couldn’t even remember what a cuddle from his mum felt like.
Marlo, Em and Magnus left the parents, who were now oblivious to anything except their new offspring, and went back out into the snow.
“Well, that was interesting,” Magnus said. He still felt melancholy. “I want it to be the spring,” he said to Marlo. “I want to get started on our journey. I want to rescue my mum and dad.”
Marlo stopped and looked at him. His grey beard had started to sprout little icicles. They made his beard sparkle in the winter sunlight.
“We have to go somewhere first, Magnus,” he said softly. “It won’t be easy to fight Murdamond, but I know someone who can help us. We have to go there first, then we can head to Murdamond’s castle. We will be facing great power; we need to be prepared.”
As they walked they heard a shout.
“Hey, Marlo; come and see who we found lurking in my barn.” It was a neighbour called Trinn and he looked worried. Magnus sighed and trudged over to Trinn’s barn. He couldn’t feel his feet any more.
Helwyr the hunter stood at the entrance and he was wearing a grim expression.
“I don’t like the look of them,” he said.
Magnus and Marlo went into the barn. It was warmer in there, but only just, and in the corner he saw two men: one short and blond and the other tall and thin with long, greasy hair. They were dressed inappropriately for the freezing temperature and they were both wearing a strange pendant that made Magnus immediately feel suspicious.
“Who are you and what are you doing in our village?” asked Marlo gruffly. The men were clutching each other to keep warm. Magnus could see their teeth chattering.
“We c… c… came to… f… f… find… y… y…you,” chattered Vile. “W… w… w… we heard y… y… you c… c… could h… h… h… help us.”
“We can’t stand here listening to this; we’ll freeze,” Marlo said, sensibly. “Come on, we’ll get you a hot drink and some warm clothes. Then you might be able to get your words out. Watch them, Helwyr; one move and you have my permission to cut their throats.”
Vile and Vicious opened their eyes wide at this, but meekly followed. They were too cold to try anything.
*
Half an hour later they were wrapped in blankets, drinking hot mint tea and blinking by the light of the fire.
“What are your names?” asked Magnus politely.
Well, my name is V… er… Vernon,” said Vicious. The warmth was making him sleepy and he had nearly given the game away.
“And you?” Magnus ask
ed Vile, whose eyes were drooping. He jerked awake.
“Er, Vi… ouch!” Vicious nudged him abruptly.
“Tell him your name, stupid.”
“Er, it’s V… v… er… Verruca.”
“Really? Your mother named you after an unpleasant foot virus?” Magnus asked incredulously. They weren’t very good baddies, in his opinion.
“Yes,” grinned Vile stupidly. “She didn’t like me very much. But you can call me Wart.”
Magnus looked at Marlo, and Marlo looked at Helwyr. Helwyr was sharpening a spear and looking at the hapless pair with an odd look on his face.
“And why do you need our help?”
Vile couldn’t look at Vicious, who was giving him a stare that would probably have turned him to stone – he could feel his eyes boring into the back of his head. Vile tried desperately to rectify the situation.
“Well,” he began, in an exaggerated fashion, his top lip trembling, and he wiped away an imaginary tear, “that evil Murdamond, you know him?”
They all nodded wryly, going along with him. “Well, we have to get to his castle. He stole our gran and we want to get her back and we want to kill him, the evil… well, anyway. She’s ninety-two and that’s no way to treat a pensioner.”
“Really?” Magnus said softly. “I agree; that’s a terrible thing to do. Why did he take your gran? What could a crook of such renown want with a geriatric?”
Vile hadn’t thought of that. He mumbled something and Vicious decided to save this sorry situation before it got any worse.
“She’s a witch, you see. A good one. She magicked a… a… boil on his nose and he hates boils. He’s so vain, you see. And he was sooooo angry he took her, and we haven’t seen her for three weeks. Someone told us you were heading north in the spring, so we decided to ask you if you’ll let us accompany you.”
“You walked all the way here in those clothes?” Marlo asked, folding his arms and staring at them.
“We were robbed. They took our coats and our boots and our fine woolly hats,” Vicious lied.
“But they didn’t take those fine pendants you are wearing around your necks, did they?” Helwyr pointed out, and began to sharpen the spear with a bit more vigor.
The two men clutched their pendants. They’d forgotten all about them.
“Er, no, they didn’t; you are right. How lucky! I think they were just cold. They just wanted our outdoor clothing.” Vile sank into his chair. This was terrible. They’d really messed this up.
Marlo beckoned Em, Helwyr and Magnus into the kitchen. Helwyr handed his spear to Trinn.
“If they move, spike ’em.”
“They are definitely Murdamond’s men,” Marlo said. “If they are the best he can find, this will be a pushover.”
“Hmm…” Magnus said. “I wonder what their mission is.”
“Sabotage; delay; to make out-and-out mischief; to spy on us – take your pick,” grunted Helwyr.
“I mean, Verucca! Do they think we are stupid?” Marlo tutted.
“Maybe,” Magnus said. “Maybe they do. Maybe we should pretend we are. I’d rather have them with us and feed them duff information than have them following us out of our sight and control. Let’s pretend we’ve fallen for their ridiculous story and then lose them in a forest halfway there.”
They all thought for a moment.
“I suppose it’s a good plan. There’s a particularly vicious dragon in the Forest of Horrible Nightmares. We have to go through there on our way to see the Lady of the Mountain. We could feed the dopey duo to Ferno.”
“The Forest of Horrible Nightmares!” Magnus gulped a bit. “A dragon! Are you making this up?”
“Why would I do that?” Marlo replied. “Yes, good idea, Magnus. We’ll go along with their idiotic story. Do you think those pendants are some kind of transmitter?”
Helwyr shrugged.
“They could be anything, but they didn’t get them at a street market. I can tell you that for nothing.”
“Where can we put them? I don’t want them here with us.” Magnus shuddered; he didn’t like them one bit. Moth would probably try to bite them.
“Send them to stay with Ermentrude the sorceress till the spring comes. She’s good with characters like Wart and Vernon and she has a couple of spare beds. They’ll have a horrible time, but at least they won’t freeze to death.”
They all trooped back into the living room where Vile and Vicious were sitting in silence. They were awaiting certain death; they were sure of it.
“Now then, lads,” Marlo said with a warm smile. “What terrible luck you’ve had. Of course you can come with us. We start out on the 21st March. It’ll be here in no time. Don’t you worry about your gran; I’m sure she can look after herself. We’ll rescue her. It will be good to have the company, won’t it, everyone?” He smiled at Magnus and Em, who smiled cheerfully and nodded. Helwyr grunted.
Vile and Vicious stared with their mouths open. Murdamond was right. The vegetable-eaters were utterly stupid. They couldn’t believe their luck.
“Well, thanks very much,” said Vile at last and he got up and moved forward, as if to hug Marlo.
“No need for that,” Marlo said quickly. “Helwyr will take you to your lodgings. See you on the first day of spring.”
The two men were bustled outside, grinning cheerfully, and Magnus watched them heading towards the tumbledown wreck where Ermentrude lived. He didn’t envy them one bit.
“We’ll watch them like hawks,” Marlo said, patting Magnus on the shoulder. “Magnus is right. It’s best to keep your enemies close. But not too close,” Marlo said grimly, and he went into the kitchen to make some biscuits.
