“I’m not flattering you. It’s a good idea.”
“Glad you approve.”
“I don’t think a full-on sexy calendar will work.”
Caleb raised a brow. “Oh? And why not, pray tell?”
“Because you’re not selling sex. You’re selling expertise.” Fully in photographer mode now, Judith circled him again. “I’m thinking you want something where people are in their element, doing what they do best. Make them doing their job sexy, without baring skin for the camera.”
“That wasn’t what I had in mind.”
“I know. But it’s different.” She stopped again, near his shoulder. “And you want this to be different, don’t you? To catch people’s eyes and their imaginations? To earn more cash for the charity?”
She couldn’t tell what was going on in his head, his attention on her as if measuring her up. Feeling a little defensive, she said, “If you don’t like the idea—”
“I didn’t say that.” He lifted his hands behind his head. “So what would you do for me, for example?”
Judith tried not to notice the impressive flex and release his biceps, or the tightening of his abs as he shifted slightly on the couch. Her mouth went dry.
Eyes off his body.
She stopped near his feet, pulling herself back into photographer mode. “For you? I’d photograph you in your kit, while you’re training or playing. I’d try and get across your love for the game. For what you do. And possibly include a motivational quote on the calendar itself, something that you might want to pass on to anyone else pursuing a dream.”
A strange look passed over his face as he stared up at her. “I’m not auctioning my rugby skills,” he said slowly.
Judith became aware suddenly that she’d moved closer to him. Very close. That a quantity of bare tawny skin was just within reach, and she could almost feel the warmth rising from it. That she could indulge the secret desire she’d nursed for years, to trace the spiraling lines of his tattoo with her fingers…
Wait. Secret desire? What secret desire? There were no secret desires about Caleb Steele going on here. None at all.
She swallowed. “So what are you auctioning then?”
The smile he gave her was very male and disgustingly smug. “Guess.”
Didn’t take a genius to work that one out. “A date with you, maybe?”
“Of course.”
“Original, Caleb.”
“It’s not supposed to be original. It’s supposed to get heaps of cash.”
And he’d get it, too. There were thousands of drooling women who’d be eager to bid on a date with one of the country’s sexiest, bad-boy rugby players.
She didn’t know why that particular thought should annoy her quite so much but it did. “Fair enough. I’m just surprised you couldn’t think of anything better to offer.”
“What do you mean by that?” There was an odd note in his voice. “What’s wrong with a date with me?”
“Nothing. Everyone else is offering their skills, though. Why don’t you?”
Caleb pushed himself up and off the couch with an impatient movement. “Because people will pay thousands to learn how to kick a ball? Oh sure, they will.”
The sharp edge in his voice made Judith stare. “It’s not learning how to kick a ball, it’s a training session with an ex-All Black. And people love that kind of thing.”
“They’d pay more for a date, and that’s kind of the point, isn’t it?”
“You don’t know that.”
He stared at her and she realized, with a hot shock, that not only was he half-naked but he was also standing very close. That her heartbeat seemed to have suddenly gotten a lot faster.
“What’s it to you?” he asked. “What do you care whether I offer my skills or not?”
She couldn’t seem to move. Couldn’t seem to speak. Couldn’t seem to think. What is the matter with you?
Awareness prickled over her skin, locking the breath in her throat. The same awareness that had made her pull away from him the night of the wedding.
“I just…I just…” She stammered pathetically. Heat was unfurling inside her, an aching need so intense she almost couldn’t stand it. He towered over her, big and muscular and male and just so…overwhelming.
His gaze sharpened, fixing onto her like a laser target. And a dark, hot flame leapt in the depths of his eyes. He moved, lifting a hand and she knew, without a shadow of a doubt that he was going to touch her. And that for the sake of her sanity she couldn’t let that happen.
“Don’t,” she said, her voice husky.
His hand kept right on going, fingers gently pushing a strand of black hair behind her ear. Brushing over her skin, leaving a trail of fire behind in its wake.
Making her shiver helplessly.
Okay, hold it. He doesn’t want you. He’s just doing it to get to you. Because that’s what he always does.
Well, it wasn’t going to work. Not this time. Over her dead, decomposing freaking body.
Chapter Three
Caleb stared, mesmerized, as the unmistakable sexual response flared in the depths of Judith’s blue eyes. So, despite all those years, all that cool disdain, and all that seeming indifference, she still wanted him.
Color flooded her cheeks and she sharply turned her back on him, striding over to where his T-shirt lay on the ground. She bent and picked it up, tossing it at him without even looking. “Here. Put your shirt on,” she said in a hoarse voice.
Savage satisfaction gripped him. Which totally wasn’t what he should be feeling right at this point in time, but that didn’t stop him from feeling it.
Perhaps he shouldn’t have touched her, but he just hadn’t been able to help himself. The way she’d looked at him had been so familiar; the polished, sophisticated mask dropping for a second. The way she used to look at him, back when she’d been eighteen and he’d been her hero. And he’d loved that look. Loved that he could be a hero for someone since his dad hadn’t wanted him.
The black wing of hair had fallen forward over one cheek. And he’d had to push it back, had to see if her hair still felt the way he remembered. Like silk.
And it had.
“What’s the matter?” he asked. He had an idea, of course.
She’d crossed over to a table on the other side of the room, pulling a camera out of the camera bag on top of it. She began fitting a lens onto it, her movements jerky and sharp. “Nothing.”
Women always said that when they really meant “everything”.
“You said don’t. Don’t what?”
“Don’t be a dickhead? Don’t be an ass?” She didn’t turn round, and he knew by the cool sarcasm in her tone that the mask was definitely firmly back in place.
“No, that’s not what you were going to say.”
“Oh really?” Judith turned and sure enough, the expression on her face was one of mild exasperation—the expression she usually wore whenever he was around. “So you can read my mind now?”
“It’s not your mind I was reading, darling.”
Another flicker in her eyes, like a ripple in a pond. “I don’t have time to debate this with you, Caleb. Shall we get on with it?”
Briefly he thought about pushing her because he wanted to hear her say it, hear her acknowledge that there was still something between them. Perhaps that wasn’t a good idea right now. They were both busy, and as much as he wanted acknowledgement, that wouldn’t help get the calendar done.
It’s not just about the calendar and you know it.
No, of course it wasn’t. But how would getting an acknowledgement from her help? It wasn’t as if he was going to do anything about it anyway.
Slowly he pulled on his shirt. “So does this mean you’re going to shoot the calendar?”
“Yes, I’ll do it. Although, I have a few conditions.”
No surprises there. Judith always did drive a hard bargain. “Such as?”
“We do this my way and we keep it professional. An
d that means definitely no touching.” Her jaw firmed. “I don’t know what your other groupies expect, but I don’t do casual.”
He studied her with a certain amount of dawning respect. He’d never seen her doing her thing in her studio, and he had to admit it was kind of impressive.
And pretty damn sexy.
“You’re not one of my ‘groupies’, Jude.”
“No, I’m not. And I never will be. Understand?”
He couldn’t help himself. “Are you sure about the no touching?”
She crossed her arms and glared at him. “Does it look like I’m the tiniest bit uncertain to you?”
Ah, he shouldn’t be teasing her like this. Because despite their chemistry, there would be no sexiness happening with Judith. Not again. No matter how satisfying her reaction to him was, Judith needed a relationship type of guy. A guy who’d always be there for her, who wouldn’t let her down. And he wasn’t that type of guy, and never would be.
Besides, when Joseph asked Caleb to work with her on this fundraiser, Caleb was pretty sure “working with her” didn’t include any sexy-type of shenanigans. He didn’t want to put that relationship at risk, either.
“I understand. Anything else?”
She leaned her hip against the table. “The shots need to be done in the studio.”
“I thought you said something about photographing people doing their jobs? How can they do that here?”
“They can bring props.”
“Seriously, Jude?”
Her hand moved, smoothing down her glossy hair. “If you want a perfect shot, it has to be here. In a controlled environment.”
Typical Jude. Even as a kid she’d always had to know what was going on, always had to have a plan, always had to be in charge. It drove him crazy.
“Sounds like it could be a bit stagey,” he commented.
“Says the man who has posing down to a fine art.”
It was clear she didn’t mean it as a compliment and for some reason, coming from her, it hurt. He tried not to let it get to him. “So give me an example of what you mean.”
Judith gave him a narrow look. “An example?”
“Yeah. Show me what you can do here.”
She didn’t reply for a moment, staring at him. Then, clearly coming to a decision, she said, “Sit on the edge the couch.”
So she was going to take up the gauntlet then? Excellent.
Caleb strolled over to the couch and arranged himself picturesquely on it.
“No.” Judith frowned. “Not like that. Sit on the edge. Like you’re sitting there having a conversation with someone.”
He adjusted his position, leaning his elbows on his knees, hands loosely clasped. “Like this?”
“Yeah, that’s good. That’s great, in fact.”
That small crumb of praise cancelled out his earlier hurt and sent a dart of unexpected pleasure through him. Pathetic, mate. Absolutely pathetic. He squashed it flat.
“What do you want me to do now?” He didn’t much like taking orders, but he was beginning to be a little curious as to what she was going to come up with.
“Just sit like that for a second.” She looked up from the camera and went over to one of the floor standing lights, where she fiddled with it.
For a change she didn’t look smooth or sophisticated or even faintly exasperated. As she moved the light and then checked her camera, she looked absorbed, concentrating fiercely on what she was doing.
Fascinating. Her job had never impinged on his consciousness much—art was not his thing—and now he couldn’t help but pay attention. He studied her as she worked, watching her absorption, his own interest catching. “You really like this photography stuff, huh?”
She didn’t look up from what she was doing. “Yes, of course. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t.”
“Why?”
“Why?” she echoed, glancing up from her camera. “What do you mean, why?”
“I mean, why is it so interesting to you?”
She blinked. “Well, I like being able to show people something new about themselves. I guess that’s why I’ve always really enjoyed portrait photography.” The look on her face relaxed, a spark of enthusiasm igniting in her eyes. “I can give people a glimpse of themselves from a different perspective, one they may not have thought of before.” A funny smile curved her mouth. “It sounds weird but I really do think that sometimes you can capture a person’s soul with a camera.”
“That’s not weird.” He liked that smile, that spark. It reminded him of the open, passionate teenager she’d been at eighteen. The one he’d been helplessly drawn to despite the fact he knew Joseph would have killed him if he’d known what had gone on between them. “That’s pretty incredible.”
Judith stared at him a moment longer before abruptly looking back down at her camera. “Yes, well. I’m sure you don’t want to hear about my photography.” Her cheeks had gone pink. “Can you smile for me?”
Actually, he kind of did want to hear about her photography. He smiled. “Nothing wrong with talking about what interests you.”
Her straight, dark brows descended a little as she stared into the camera. “Only if other people are interested, too. No, I don’t want that smile. Give me a real one.”
A real one. What the hell did she mean by that? “I’m interested.”
“Yeah, right. And now you’re scowling. No, smile properly.”
“I am smiling properly.”
“No, you’re not. You’re giving me Abs of Steele again.”
Caleb shifted on the couch. The way she’d said the name the media had lumbered him with made it sound even lamer than it was. “What do you want, then?” he growled. “If you’re not careful I’ll take my shirt off again.”
She huffed out a breath. “Remember that time you and Joe took all the chocolate chips out of that cookie? And then replaced them with cat food?”
Expecting some snark, he was caught momentarily off-guard. “Yeah? So what?”
“And then you gave it to me and I ate it?”
A memory spilled through him. He’d been at Joe’s, and Judith had gone off at them for eating all the cookies in the pantry. She’d been all of ten to their fifteen. So they’d gotten revenge. “You did eat it,” he said, remembering. “All of it.”
One corner of her mouth curled up in another smile. Man, he liked that smile of hers. A rare and beautiful thing.
He felt himself smiling, too. “And then you asked for another one.”
“I did.” Her fingers moved and the shutter clicked. “But I didn’t like it as much as the first one.”
“And ever since then you’ve had this really strange craving for cat food.”
Her smile deepened. “No, not cat food. Fish-flavored chocolate chip cookies.”
“Well, what do you know?” he couldn’t help commenting. “Judith Ashton can smile after all.”
Her head jerked up and an expression he couldn’t catch flashed briefly in her gaze. Then it was gone. She looked away again. “And you can be an actual person for a change.”
“What do you mean by that?”
She came over and to his surprise, sat on the couch beside him, and handed him the camera. “Here. Look.”
On the tiny screen he saw himself, sitting there with his hands loose and relaxed, an unguarded, boyish smile on his face. Not at all his usual look. The image made him feel uncomfortable and rather exposed. “Christ. I look old.” He tried to make it sound joking.
Judith took the camera back. “You are old.”
“Gee, thanks.” He turned to her. She was gazing down at the little screen, cycling through the images. Her lashes were very long, black and silky, her skin a creamy, delicate pink. The scent of her, sunshine and roses, wrapped itself around him. Such a feminine, sweet scent for such a sophisticated, controlled woman.
She hadn’t always been like that. Once she’d smiled and laughed with him. Given him all the attention and affection he’d craved so badly.
All the things he’d never gotten from his father after his mother had died.
His heart ached at the memories, like the burn of overused muscles after a hard game.
Of course that had been before Joseph had warned him away. Before Caleb had made the decision that caring about another person was just too hard. Too painful.
“What?” She didn’t look up.
“I take it back. Your studio photos are pretty great.” Disquieted by memories, Caleb pushed himself up from the couch. “Send me the best of those images when you’re ready. I need to show them to the charity to see what they think.”
She looked up at him in surprise. “You don’t want to choose a few yourself?”
“No. I trust your judgment.”
“Well…uh…okay. Did you want that quote with the image?”
He waved a hand as he moved toward the doorway to the waiting room. “Yeah. That would be cool.”
“But what quote do you want?”
God, he didn’t care about the stupid quotes. He just wanted to get out. Get away from the sudden, aching regret that was choking him. “I don’t know. You find one you like.”
“Caleb, this has to come from you, not me.”
His chest felt tight and hollow. Like a drum. “Nah, I’m no good at that kind of thing. You pick one. I need it by tonight, okay?”
He didn’t wait for her response. The heat of her as she’d sat next to him and the scent of her body had caused the walls to close in, and he needed to get out of there quickly. Get away from her before he did something stupid like touch her again.
Judith Ashton was off limits. Seriously off limits. Because she didn’t want casual and casual was the only thing he could give her. Casual was the only thing he could give anyone.
Caring hurt. It always had.
…
Judith couldn’t stop looking at the image on her laptop. Caleb Steele sitting on the black velvet couch, hands loosely clasped. Smiling. And a smile that was far more charming, far more natural than anything she’d seen on his face before. A smile that was boyish and delighted all at once.
Talking Dirty With the Player Page 4
