I analyze his face to make sure everything is all right. His eyes are still closed and he is caressing my cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. He takes a deep breath before looking up and locking his gaze directly on to mine. “You’re killing me, Kins.” I open my mouth to ask what I did, but he silences me with another heart-stopping kiss. I take that to mean everything is still good, so I press my lips back to his just as hard.
I move my hands to undo each of his shirt buttons. Once I’m done with the last one I take the opportunity to admire his six (more like eight!) pack abs with my fingertips. I catch a glimpse of a tattoo on his right side, stretching across his ribcage, but further inspection will have to wait until another time. He slips his hands back under my dress and grabs both sides of my lace panties. He takes a small step back and glides them down my legs in one swift motion before dropping them to the floor. He places one hand behind my head and the other grips my waist as he gently lays me back on the desk. He trails soft kisses down my neck, no doubt recalling my little admission from earlier. The man is good. As if I couldn’t get any wetter . . .
He must know this, because I barely have time to process the whole neck kissing thing before I feel one of his strong fingers push inside me.
I let out a small gasp as he works his finger in and out, then stretches me a bit further with another. Still moving his hand rhythmically, his mouth makes its way back up to mine. He kisses me deeply before whispering, “You’re so perfect and wet for me” against my lips. He then leans back to stand up and slowly—oh so sloowwwly—slides his fingers out from me. I perch myself up on my elbows and watch as he stares at me. I scoot myself up to reach for his pants again, which are totally in the way right now. Lucas quickly reaches into his pocket for his wallet and pulls out a foil packet. I slide his pants down his strong legs and I’m pretty sure I involuntarily lick my lips at the sight of him.
OK, maybe it’s voluntary.
He grabs himself and strokes up and down a couple of times before tearing open the condom and sliding it on. It must be obvious I’m gawking at him because he lets out a small chuckle, puts his hand behind my neck and says “Lay back, babe” as he maneuvers me back down on the desk.
Mmm . . . bossy Lucas . . .
I do as he says, and once he seems satisfied that I’m comfortable, he positions himself between my legs and pulls me to the edge of the desk by the backs of my knees. He moves his right hand back up to grip my hip, and uses his left to guide himself inside me. He goes slowly at first, until I adjust to his size, then starts quickening his pace. Now both of his hands grab my hips and I reach out to grip his forearms, silently praying this will never end. Sex is usually a way for me to escape, and most of the time I’m left feeling more empty than satisfied.
But this, right now, with Lucas?
It’s hard to describe, but it’s as if he’s holding me so close that all of my broken pieces are fitting perfectly back together. I throw my head back and squeeze my eyes shut, afraid to open them in case it all turns out to be a dream.
How much time passes? I’m not quite sure. Seconds? Minutes? Hours? I am in such a state of ecstasy that I lose all concept of time and space. I finally brave opening my eyes to look up at Luc and find him staring right at me—right in me—and it’s in that moment that I lose every ounce of control as a wave of complete and utter satisfaction rolls through me. I let out a moan and relax back against the hard wood of the desk. I don’t let go of Lucas’ arms, but my grip loosens. When I’m done riding out the intensity of this feeling, I feel Lucas shift closer so his mouth is at my ear. “I’m gonna come, babe . . .” he whispers—clearly remembering his promise when we first met—before falling apart a second later. He drops his head to my chest as he stills inside me, and we lay there, each trying to catch our breath. I think I feel his lips on my skin before he pulls back and picks up a box of tissues that previously had been knocked to the floor. If I didn’t know better, I’d say it was a gentle kiss, but he’s up and cleaning himself off so fast I’m sure I must have imagined it.
I sit up, holding onto the edge of the desk to ground myself. My legs dangle off the side and I watch as Lucas pulls his pants back up. He looks over at me as he stuffs his hands in his pockets. God he looks hot standing there with an unbuttoned white shirt.
I also think he looks nervous, but then he quickly lightens the mood by saying “So . . . was it good for you?” with an adorable tilt of his head and a small shrug.
I’m not sure how to read him now, so I decide to play it safe and shoot back with my own playful shrug. “It was OK. Very friendly and all.” I smile so he knows I’m teasing.
He chuckles and drops his head. One hand moves to rub the back of his neck. “Well, glad I could be of service.”
He gets that nervous sort of uncomfortable look again, and then starts to button up his shirt as if to keep himself busy.
Hell if I make this awkward. I mean I was the one who basically just asked him to screw me out of the blue, so I want to reiterate that I don’t expect anything more.
I can’t expect anything more.
I jump down from the desk, smooth out my dress, and reach down to pick up his jacket. I hold it out and he takes it from my outstretched hand. “I guess we better straighten up.” I look at the assorted office supplies scattered on the ground. I lift up a name plaque from the floor and glance at the name. “I’m sure Mr. Evans wouldn’t be too thrilled that we just got it on in his office.” I begin straightening the items that were pushed aside.
Through a lopsided grin he theorizes, “If anything, I’m sure he’d just be jealous.”
I throw what I hope is a flirty smile over my shoulder. “It can be our little secret, then.” I throw in an exaggerated eyebrow wiggle for good measure. Lucas starts to laugh, so I know my plan to amuse him worked. “Come on, let’s go grab a drink. I’m parched.” I reach for the door and gesture with a nod for Lucas to follow me.
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” Lucas looks down at the floor where a black scrap of lace is still laying.
I shrug my shoulders. “Nah. They’re all wet. I hate wearing wet underwear. Let’s just say it can be a little consolation prize for Mr. Evans. Secret be damned.” I wink as he bends down to pick up the panties, holding them out on one finger.
“You’re crazy, Kins.” He shakes his head, but I can tell he’s entertained.
I slide the fabric out of his hand and smile sweetly. “And you love it, Luc.”
We make our way back out to the party when Kelley suddenly runs up. “There you are! I thought I’d lost you.”
“Sorry, Kell. This is Lucas, Eli’s son. Lucas, this is my friend Kelley.” I motion toward the elevators. “Luc and I just went outside to get some fresh air.” I glance at Luc, who nods at the introduction looking cool as a cucumber. Maybe he does actually want to keep this a secret.
“I’ll let you two catch up. I’ll grab us some drinks.” Luc smiles at us both before heading off to the bar.
Kelley watches him walk away and I fight the urge to poke her eyes out. Thankfully she turns back to me a second later.
“Wow, Kins. That’s Eli’s son? No wonder you’re always breaking shit at the house.” She nudges me and I can’t help but laugh. On our way over tonight I mentioned in passing how Eli’s son helped me with a few things, but I didn’t offer up too many details.
“I do not break shit there . . . not on purpose anyway. And Luc and I are just friends. He’s being really nice helping me out while his dad is gone.”
“Yeah, Riiight.” I don’t even have to look at her—I can sense the eye-roll in the tone of her voice. Whatever.
I attempt to change the subject. “You’re one to talk. I saw you with Ryan earlier.”
“Yeah. It was just business. Trust me, I don’t see that going anywhere else, which is a shame because he still smells goddamn delicious.” She shakes her head, disappointed. “It seems we have a few new clients in common though, so I’m sure I’ll b
e seeing more of him.”
Kelley then starts to talk about a few deals they are both working on, but I can’t hear her. My mind is suddenly focused across the room where I see some leggy blonde with fake lashes grabbing Lucas’ arm and whispering something in his ear. I’m too far away to make out anything that they say, but from the way he smiles and lets her lead him out of the room, I think I get the gist.
Ever since my parents died, I hardly ever have the urge to cry. It’s like I’m broken and can’t feel things right anymore. But right now I can certainly feel the tears prick the back of my eyes, which is making me all sorts of confused. I know I was the one who proclaimed our hookup to be no big deal, but from the way my chest aches and my stomach turns, maybe I don’t know what the heck I want. Clearly he didn’t take what just happened to mean anything more than what I said it was—a fun time with no strings attached—and why should he?
And just like that I am reminded that relationships are not my thing and I shouldn’t pretend sex with Lucas was anything more than just that. I haven’t up to this point, so what in the hell made me suddenly get so emotional? The tears that were starting to well up immediately subside.
It was just a quick hookup, albeit a really mind-blowing one, but a casual hookup none the less. Sure I like the guy—in a strictly have fun with a friend kind of way—but that’s it. I stand up a little straighter and purposely look away from the direction Lucas and the blonde went. The only way to handle this is to maintain control.
If I decide to leave feelings out of this, I can’t get hurt.
Lucas
So.
Fucking.
Intense.
That’s all I can say about sex with Kinsley. I’m no stranger to being with a woman—many women in fact—but it has never been even close to this. The way our bodies seemed to fit together so perfectly, the way her skin felt on mine, the way her lips tasted . . .
Damn, I need to pull it together.
I was just trying to get a rise out of her when I asked about the last time she had sex. I mean, she started the damn game. But when she propositioned me, I couldn’t help myself. To hell with celibacy. She made it clear she’s not looking for a commitment, so if we can have a mutually friendly relationship, then why the hell not? Thank God I saved that fucking condom Ryan threw at me.
I replay the moments over and over again in my head as I walk over to the bar. Part of me thought she was all talk, and when we were alone she would just laugh and say “Gotcha,” but from the moment our lips connected, I was a goner. She’s definitely a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to get it. I was so stunned by what happened—and how she didn’t try to make some big deal about it—that I could barely say anything to her afterward. Good thing Kelley came up to us, because I was about five seconds away from dragging Kins back to the office for a repeat performance.
Or to just hold her close, because I think I would be OK with that, too.
Oh for the love of fuck . . .
I could use a minute alone to process.
But no sooner than I go to order a drink, I feel a hand on my arm. Chelsea. Just perfect.
“Hey stranger. I was wondering where you wandered off to.”
“Hey. Yeah turns out my . . . uh, friend . . . showed up so I went to say hi.” I try to avoid making eye contact. I don’t want to deal with this right now.
“Your friend? By the way you couldn’t keep your eyes off that girl, I’d say she’s more than just a friend. And even if she isn’t yet, my bet is she will be soon.” Chelsea gently pats my arm and gives me what looks like a genuine smile. Discomfort and confusion must show on my face, because she starts to laugh and leans in so only I can hear. “Oh, come on, Luc! You don’t think I believe you’re a hermit now, do you? I get that you need to get out there and play the field, so to speak. You can tell me about the women in your life. We’re friends, right? ” She looks at me sweetly and I can’t help but smile back. Maybe Ryan has misjudged her feelings.
“Now come on, Erik has some people he wants to introduce you to.” She steps back and grabs my arm to pull me into the next room.
After what seemed like three hours of schmoozing and shaking hands last night, I was finally able to break away from Erik to go look for Kinsley. But unfortunately Ryan told me she had already left. It was late so I didn’t want to call her, deciding instead to see if she would be around this morning.
I pull up to the cottage and see a black Honda parked in the drive. I walk up to the porch and knock on the door. After a minute, a surprised looking Kinsley appears. She offers up a smile, but something about it feels forced.
“Hey. I was hoping you’d be here. Sorry I got pulled away last night.”
“Oh, no worries. I saw you were . . . occupied.” She makes no move to open the door.
“Yeah, Erik wanted to introduce me to some people so I had to do the whole work thing. I still owe you a drink, though.”
“Don’t even worry about it.” She just stands there shifting her eyes as if she’s a bit uncomfortable. The way she doesn’t ask me to come in makes me feel completely shut out . . . literally and figuratively.
“Can I come in?”
“Sure.” Kinsley opens the door and steps aside before turning down the hall. “I’m just working on a few things in the back.”
I follow her to the back room where she begins to busy herself with an arrangement of flowers on the big worktable, her back to me. A slightly awkward silence ensues as I try to figure her out. Is she mad? Full of regret? She seems more indifferent than anything else, and I’m not sure what to say. I keep thinking back to how she didn’t want last night to be a big deal, so maybe she thinks I’m the one who’s going to be weird about it.
“Listen, Kins . . . I’m not really sure how to do this whole friends thing, but I like spending time with you. You make me laugh and you keep me on my toes, yet you’re also really easy to talk to. And what happened last night . . . it was pretty great.” I try to keep my voice steady and cool so as not to give away the fact that I actually think what happened last night was fucking amazing. “I was thinking maybe we could see where this goes?”
Kinsley drops her head before turning around to face me. “I like spending time with you, too, Luc. I like that it’s easy. My life is crazy enough right now and I don’t need any drama or complications. I told you I’m not interested in a relationship, but I just want to make sure we’re on the same page. If we are to continue anything here, it would be strictly a friends with benefits type situation. Nothing serious.”
I take a step closer so I’m leaning next to her at the table. Despite the fact that I have an undeniable attraction to Kinsley—a physical one as well as some type of emotional one—I also know that I am crap when it comes to real relationships. I don’t want to hurt her, so the fact that she is the one shutting me out of the emotional side is almost too good to be true.
“Not only are we on the same page, I think we both wrote the same damn book.” I chuckle as a more genuine smirk breaks across her face. “Let’s just say I’m not exactly looking for anything serious, either.”
We both stay quiet for a second. If she hadn’t just told me herself this was going to be casual, I would swear she looks sad. But then she smiles and says, “Good,” so I’m wondering if it’s only me that feels strange about it. I was just offered the perfect situation, so I shake off any feelings of . . . what is that? Disappointment? Nah. I think I’m just in shock. I basically get to have my cake and eat it too, if you catch my drift.
I relax my shoulders. “So, now that we’ve established we’re pretty great together, does this mean we can continue to explore our friendship further? You said yourself you like easy, and babe,” I drop my voice low and seductive, “I’m always easy.”
She laughs before nudging me in the shoulder. “Oh yeah? Well you might not want to go spreading that little fact around there, pal. People will talk.”
God, her smile is gorgeous . . .
Wait, friends can still think that kind of shit, right?
I turn and move to stand in front of her, resting my hands on either side of the table behind. I put my lips impossibly close to her ear. “It can be another one of our secrets then.” I look into her eyes to make sure she really wants to see where this goes as much as I do, and next thing I know she’s grabbing onto my shirt and her perfect mouth is on mine.
I catch both sides of her face and kiss her deep. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling all sorts of pent up and ready to throw her down and take her right on the table. But I see her flowers perfectly arranged in their vases, so I opt to grab her ass, spin her around, and walk her backward. I feel like a fucking animal, but that’s what this woman does to me.
With her back pushed against the wall, I reach for her shirt and pull it up over her head. She’s wearing the sexiest black bra that makes her boobs look fucking edible. I can’t help but go in for a handful of each, kissing across her chest. She reaches for my shirt and I help her pull it over my head. I feel proud of the way she looks at me with pure lust in her eyes.
I go for the button on her jeans just as she reaches for mine and we both scramble as if it’s a race to see who can get the other’s clothes off faster. Kinsley moves her hands up around my neck and her hips start grinding against mine. She’s in only her black bra and matching boy short panties and it’s taking every ounce of my self-control not to come before I even get inside her.
And then reality hits me like a punch to the throat.
“Fuck,” I groan, kissing Kinsley one last time before pulling back. She lets out a cute, pouty breath. “I really hate to have to say this, but I don’t have a condom on me. I used the only one in my wallet last night and I didn’t exactly plan for this to happen when I decided to stop by. Are you on the pill?”
Crazy Beautiful (Crazy Beautiful #1) Page 6
