“Never directly heard of anyone being sent there, and even less of them getting back out. You know how it is with those myths that everyone knows about but presumably no one survived to tell the tale?” He flashed his teeth in a much less humorous grin than before. “Always makes you wonder how that story got out to make the rounds.”
“It’s real,” Nate insisted, giving Burns a warning glance. “And what they did there is a lot less mythological than you old wives likely told each other to frighten the rookies.”
Tanner cleared his throat, ready to chime in. “I was working in Indonesia with a guy who swore that one of his buddies was sent there after he had some anger management issues.” His grimace made me guess that it had been worse than just screaming random obscenities at his superior officer.
“Let me guess. He was never heard of again?” I offered.
Tanner shook his head, looking rather unhappy. “He was, but Clinton said he was never quite the same. Not quite right in the head, you know?”
Burns seemed ready to laugh at that, but Nate’s grim expression held him back. I raised my brows at him. “Something tells me that you know more because compared to those yahoos, you were in a command position that came with a very special briefing.”
“Something like that,” Nate admitted. “Let’s just say that with the stunts I pulled, I expected to end up there sooner or later myself. It’s not the place where I want you to end up.”
Exhaling forcefully, I did my best to keep a brave face up, while all I really wanted to do was curl up into a ball and hide. “It’s one option. It’s not the only option.”
Now it was Nate’s brows that hiked up toward his hairline. “And what, pray tell, is the alternative? Don’t waste your breath on telling me you’ll off yourself. Didn’t have any of it last time, and that hasn’t changed.”
The bout of hysterical laughter that came up inside of me was disconcerting, and not just to me. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I huffed out.
“And you do?” Nate ventured a guess.
There was no sense in denying it. “What my body is crawling with won’t just kill me. It will kill me slowly, in excruciating pain. I will literally rot away, piece by fucking piece, and I will beg you to cut me apart long before the end. Is that what you want? Because that’s going to happen if we don’t find a different solution. And I will find that solution before I have too few fingers left to still hold a gun and pull the trigger.”
I could tell that Tanner and Burns thought I was being melodramatic; Nate didn’t. “What about these?” He shook the paper bag with the meds.
“There’s a good chance none of that will do more than give me a few more days before it all goes south.”
He didn’t exactly brighten, but the look of conviction that broke through his underlying frustration was oddly comforting. “That’s all you need. I’ll carry you there, if I have to. But you will get there in time.”
“And then what?”
Nate ignored my pessimistic tone. “Then you will convince them that it’s in their best interest to fix you.”
“You think they’ll just do so out of the goodness of their hearts? If they’re as bad as everyone thinks, what will keep them from locking me up in a cell to be studied and dissected, one little slice at a time?” The very idea of that was enough to make my stomach heave.
Nate’s hard stare was a silent reminder for me not to go off on another tangent—as if I wasn’t simply telling it as it was—but rather than offer a condescending remark, he reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a small flash drive, of all things.
“Because you will strike a bargain with them that will prevent them from turning you into a quadruple amputee lab monkey.”
I chose to ignore his biting sarcasm, my curiosity piqued. “What’s on there?”
“My brother’s research.”
That made me frown. “And you really think that they didn’t get that off the company servers long before the shit hit the fan?”
Nate’s smile turned lopsided. “The official stuff, sure. Maybe even the logs that Thecla tried to delete after she killed him. But let’s just say that, not unlike you, my brother was rather paranoid when it came to trusting the people he was working with. He kept all his notes and part of the data from his private research offsite, at our mother’s practice. That’s the last copy she got from him, eleven days before he died.”
That was almost good enough to make me forget about my constantly sore throat and the various aches throbbing through my body as I stared at the flash drive. “You’ve had this all along.”
“And intended to take it to my grave,” Nate professed. “I briefly considered mentioning it if you’d stayed in Aurora at Stone’s little lab, but let’s just say that when it became obvious that they were still fucking around with the serum, I decided that the last thing I wanted was for my brother’s legacy to fall into the hands of the people he was ultimately working against.”
Understandable, even if it hurt a little that he hadn’t confided in me earlier. “And now you’re willing to just give that up, for me?”
His chuckle was shy of sarcastic. “Nothing I wouldn’t do for love.”
“What keeps them from just lying, taking the data, and still turning me into their new favorite pin cushion? Or just plain letting me die? Just because they’ve pretty much left a summons for me doesn’t mean they intend to help me.”
“Because we’re not going to give them the data, but your notes on the data, after you’ve memorized it all and we’ve destroyed this for good. They let you die, they lose it all. They save you, they better put you in a mood to cooperate. And if I may say so, it’s one of my better plans. I’m sure they have ways to torture some of the answers out of you, but if they want your brain to work reliably, they need you to be alert, cozy, and happy to share your vast knowledge with them. Trust me, they’ll bite. If I know anything about these people, it’s that they are ruthless enough in their pursuit of knowledge that they will betray their own principles if it works out for them in the end. We just have to get you there still lucid enough so you can explain what they are missing out on. The rest will take care of itself.”
“That’s your plan?” I couldn’t help but remain skeptical. “I’ve never been that great with retaining numbers in my head, and I hate to admit, but I feel like all that being chased around and hit on the head hasn’t exactly increased my cognitive capabilities.”
Nate’s lips compressed to a thin line but he didn’t protest. “Then give them the data as it is. I don’t give a fuck what happens to it either way. All I care about is you.”
“Sheesh, always with those declarations,” I muttered but couldn’t hide a smile. A wan one as it was impossible to ignore just how slim my chances of getting through this in one piece were. That pun made me crack up, but I did my best to suppress the manic cackle. “It’s decided then. We head to Canada and almost certain doom. Never thought I’d say that in connection to each other.”
“That we are,” Jason offered way too enthusiastically after listening to the conversation we’d just had.
I shook my head, rather vehemently. “You’re not coming. None of you. It’s just us.” I didn’t bother not including Burns in that as I doubted anything short of a bullet between the eyes would stop him.
Charlie, always a good second in command, had his friend’s back. “It’s way too dangerous out there for just a single car. You need backup.”
Tanner chimed in before I could refute that claim. “Particularly if your health is declining as rapidly as you want to make us believe.”
“Yeah, we’re not going to abandon you if you need us,” Gita enthused.
I made a face when Nate didn’t move a muscle to discourage them. “You know that he’ll only let you tag along because he’s reasoning that more people means more people who can lay down their lives before it’s time for me to bite the dust?”
Nobody except me seemed to b
e fazed by that. At my glower, Nate conceded. “Three cars, no more. It’s anyone’s guess how much of a suicide mission this is going to turn into, and I won’t be responsible for taking out what’s left of all our groups.”
Dan Harris had seemed ready to throw in his lot with us until Nate said that, but looked relieved now. “We’ll lead the rest back down south, and let your people know what’s actually going on. That’s not something you want to trust to the open radio network.”
Jason didn’t hesitate to turn to his people. “Huck, take the rest back to the settlement. Doyle and I will go with them.” Charlie nodded his grim assent, while the guy Jason had addressed took it without more than a stoic blink.
“What about your almost-wife?” I tried to remind Jason.
He offered a quick laugh. “Sora told me before we left that she doesn’t want to see me anywhere close to home until I’ve settled all unfinished business. A smart woman.”
“Except for wanting to marry you,” Charlie joked, then turned to me. “We know what we’re in for. As do our people.”
That left only the idiot brigade, and judging from the enthusiastic look on Francis’s face, I had to do something or else we’d end up with one of them riding with us. Signaling to Nate that I would be just a minute, I walked up to Blondie, jerking my head to the side for him to follow me. He did, excited enough that he didn’t seem to mind wading through the deeper snow off the beaten path to the side of the house.
Turning to him as I stopped, I studied him for a moment, trying to decide whether this was a colossal mistake—but it begged the question whether I would still be alive to deal with the consequences. “I need you to stay here.”
He was shaking his head even before I finished. “Not gonna happen,” he insisted. “I know you still don’t trust us, even though we got you out of that trap by the mall, but—“
My glare made him shut up. “On the contrary, I do trust you,” I insisted, not quite lying. “That’s why I need you to stay. You’re not associated with us so Wilkes will let you in, and you’re asshats enough that you don’t have to pretend much to get along well with the resident population. Anyone else they’d expect, but you just need to tell them how we met and they will soon forget that you hitched a ride with us.” I added a dramatic pause. “Unless it’s too dangerous for you to turn from road bandit to infiltrator, that is.”
Blondie puffed up his chest, falling for it hook, line, and sinker. “You can count on us,” he declared proudly. Then his mind caught up with the implication, making him wince. “Exactly what do you need us to do? Because as much as I can’t stand those soldier assholes, I don’t like the idea of murdering anyone in their sleep.”
I shook my head. “Nothing like that. Information is far more important. Stay here, become a part of the community, but keep your ears open. I have a feeling that however our little trip works out, things won’t turn to the better come spring. Having friends in low places—friends who know who is potentially on our side as well, or could be persuaded—will be invaluable. And if I’m wrong, you still get to spend the winter in one of the best-equipped places out there. If you don’t hear from me after the Silo thaws out once more, consider the deal done, and you can go back to being an embarrassment for the male half of the human population.” I waited for his nod—accompanied by a smirk—before I reached into my pocket and pulled out the piece of paper that Greene had given me for that very purpose. “Here, guard that with your life. Or better yet, memorize it and destroy it. This is how you reach someone in New Angeles who will know what to do with any intel you’re ready to share. I doubt it will work more than a month or two, but it’s all I’ve got.”
Francis looked at the scribbles with something akin to awe before his gaze flickered up to my face. “You can count on us. We’ll hold down the fort here as long as you need us. And next time you start a crusade, we’ll be right there with you.”
I couldn’t help but grimace at that. “I wasn’t really keen on doing it the first time around, and absolutely don’t need a repeat. I’d be happy to just hunker down in a cabin in the woods and live out a boring, long, happy life.”
Blondie glanced from me to Nate, and back. “Something tells me that won’t happen. You’re both not cut out for laying low.” He chuckled. “Me on the other hand? I excel at riding out the storm without being caught up in it.”
“I’m counting on that,” I said, slapping him good-naturedly on the arm. “I think Sgt. Blake is a good candidate for getting into the Silo. Besides his unreasonable hatred for me he seemed like he had his heart in the right spot.”
Frances nodded, although he looked a little doubtful. If I had to take a guess, because of the “unreasonable” part of my comment. I left it at a nod for goodbye before I turned and trudged over to where Jason and Nate had in the meantime gotten everyone ready.
Without another comment, I slid into the passenger seat of the Jeep, leaving the wheel to Nate. Burns took the back row, squeezing my shoulder briefly after buckling himself in. My throat seized up, this time with something other than the next coughing fit. Damn, but I really didn’t like this. Not one bit.
Chapter 16
The first leg of the journey was easy enough. We needed to find a computer so I could get a look at the files on that flash drive, and print out what parts looked promising enough that I could study them. Even in the wasteland of Montana, it only took us an hour and two busted-down doors to find a house that had remained relatively dry inside for electronics to still work once they were hooked up to a small portable generator. While the others raided the cupboards of anything that might add to our layers of insulation, or feed us for another day, I scanned the surprising number of documents. It was obvious that Nate’s plan for me to remember it all was insane, but that still didn’t mean that our cards were bad. None of the images I looked over had been in anything I’d gotten my grubby hands on since the shit had hit the fan, and I’d spent a good part of the days after our assault on the base studying what I’d found on their computers. In hindsight I felt a lot like kicking myself for not liberating Alders of every little scrap of knowledge he might have had with him in his Cheyenne Mountain hideout, but then none of that would have been new for the people we were trying to bargain with, or so I figured.
I went on printing out as much as there was paper available, prioritizing on the last modified date of the files. I ended up with several folders heavy enough to make me grunt as I picked them up, wondering if I’d get the chance to work through half of them. Before turning off the computer, I hesitated, then copied the entire contents of the flash drive to the hard drive. I wasn’t sure I’d find the house once more, particularly without all the snow around, but I was suddenly loath to put all my eggs in a single basket. Without enough time to analyze all the data, I wasn’t sure how valuable it actually was, but if there was even a chance that it was vital, I wanted to make sure that someone outside that black ops lab could retrieve it. Wishful thinking, maybe, but after hawking up blood twice in under ten minutes I felt like I would soon be running on that alone.
We only spent half an hour at the house, but that was still long enough that we had to brush a heap of snow off the cars to get back into them. A weather forecast would have been nice, but so would working road service. All we had were chains for the tires that we’d put on before leaving the Silo. That would have to suffice.
As Colorado residents in their previous lives, Jason and Charlie knew a thing or two about getting around in snow high enough to suffocate in on foot, but just after dark even they gave up and we hunkered down in a house by the road about fifty miles away from the Silo. The light snow of the morning had turned into a storm that made navigating impossible, so it was our safest bet to hunker down before we froze to death out there. With sight down to less than twenty yards, Nate opted for all of us to remain inside, with one guard posted by a window—and me off the rotation, as much as I tried to protest.
Keeping my mind busy during th
e day hadn’t been easy, but between sorting through the new research files and chewing meds like candy, I’d managed. I’d planned on spending most of the evening with reading and taking notes, but I was pretty much wiped by the time everyone was fed and I found myself swaddled in a heap of blankets in a corner of the room that we’d declared as our home for the night. My head hurt so badly that it was hard to see straight, let alone concentrate on anything, and I dozed off several times before I gave up and succumbed to sleep.
Only my mind had other ideas, and I ended up wide awake at two in the morning. The lights were out and the air outside my cocoon of blankets cold enough that when I touched my nose and cheeks, they stung slightly. The motion made Burns look in my direction from where he kept watch by the window next to the door, half of his face obscured by his night vision gear. I tried to go back to sleep, but the racing thoughts in my head wouldn’t let me so I gave up and, still wrapped in one of the blankets, made my way over to him.
“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” he whispered as I joined him, holding out a thermos to me. The tea inside was no longer hot but still warm enough to go down smoothly, making me guess that Nate had left it with whoever was up on rotation in case I woke up in the middle of the night. That level of forethought was downright disturbing.
“Can’t,” I croaked out, downing a second cup to get my voice working once more. To no one’s surprise, it didn’t work, but at least I felt a little less like death warmed over. That pun failed to crack me up. “I think my circadian rhythm is shot for good. My body folds when exhaustion gets too much, but as soon as the batteries are recharged, I’m up again.”
“You don’t exactly look invigorated,” Burns offered, eyeing me critically.
“Gee, thanks. Guess who cares?” Rather than wait for an answer, I looked outside, seeing nothing but white. “Where are the cars?”
“See those lumps over there? That’s them,” Burns pointed out. That didn’t look promising, but it wasn’t like we had time to wait for the snow to stop. If it would even stop; I had no idea how long snowstorms usually lasted in Montana. For all I knew it would be like this until late March.
Green Fields (Book 7): Affliction Page 23
