He put his hand over mine, holding my palm to his arm. “You will,” he said. “That’s why we’re here tonight.”
“Really?” I searched his face, and saw only genuine honesty. “You think I can feel like your tattoo?” I ran my fingers over his arm, pretending I was flying over piano keys instead of his skin.
“I know it.” He stared at me, and for a moment, everything fell away. The noise, the bustle, the glaring lights of the stage, the people. The world just stopped, until there was nothing left but Rafe, me, and the promise of his tattoo coming to life for me.
Rafe leaned toward me, his eyes searching mine, still holding my hand to his arm. “I have to ask you something.”
I felt my throat tighten at the intensity of his expression. My heart began to thunder in my ears. “What?”
I saw questions in his eyes, a yearning I didn’t understand. “On Sunday,” he said, “were you asking me to go to your semi-formal with you?”
Oh…that’s what he wanted to know? I pressed my lips together. What answer did he want? “I...”
“Isn’t your boyfriend going with you?” He was watching my face so carefully I felt like he was trying to strip away my defenses and pry all my secrets right out of my mind.
I shifted restlessly in my chair. “Well...” Crud. What should I say? I mean, was I going to admit I’d lied the whole time?
“Don’t you have a date?” he asked.
Oh, man. The way he was staring at me, like I was the only thing in the entire world worth noticing, was overwhelming and incredible. I suddenly wanted him to know the truth. I didn’t want to lie to him. Of anyone in the world to know who I really was, I wanted it to be Rafe. “Well, I guess I have a date, but I just said yes to him last night because, well...”
Something glittered in his eyes. “You really did ask me.”
I opened my mouth to say yes, to confess it all, when I remembered Paige. Rafe had gone out with her last night. No matter what I said, it wouldn’t change that, and if I told him I’d lied, he might think I liked him, and then all this intimacy would be gone. I couldn’t go back to Rafe thinking I was stalking him. I wanted it to stay like this. I couldn’t risk the truth, and why should I? He had a girlfriend, so the truth wouldn’t gain me anything, but it might make me lose everything.
“No, I didn’t ask you.” I managed a snort of laughter and pulled my hand free, even though my heart was pounding. “I was just asking in case I needed to ask later. Like if my date got run over by a bus or something.”
He shot me a skeptical look, making it clear he didn’t believe me. “You really think I’d fit in at a semi-formal for St. Mary’s?” There was a flash of vulnerability on his face, and I realized he was serious.
He didn’t think he’d cut it for a St. Mary’s dance? Screw that. I knew all about not feeling good enough, and it sucked. So, I looked right at him and gave him the truth. “You’d fit in anywhere you wanted, Rafe. Anywhere.”
A slow smile curved his lips, and I smiled back.
“Does your boyfriend go to Inverness?” he asked.
There it was. My chance to tell him Les wasn’t my boyfriend. But what was the point? He just took Paige out last night. She wasn’t fake and I didn’t want Rafe to get uncomfortable around me again. This moment was too good to ruin. So, I nodded. “Les is a sophomore there. Plays football.”
“Ah. A football player.” Rafe gave me a speculative look. “I wouldn’t think you were the type to be into a football player.”
I wasn’t, but how did he know that? “What’s my type? You?”
He blinked. “What? Why would you say that?”
Oh, God. Had I really just said that? Just when we’d gotten past the awkwardness of him thinking I liked him, I had to go and blurt that out? What was wrong with me? Seriously? “Yeah,” I said, trying to turn it into a joke. “You’re the nephew of the woman put on this earth to torture me. My dream guy.”
His gaze narrowed, and the warmth vanished from his eyes. “You judge me for being Aunt Joyce’s nephew?”
No. I think you’re perfect. Like I could say that. So, I shrugged, and grabbed a carrot from the plate on our table. “She hates me.”
Rafe frowned. “She doesn’t hate you.” He looked around, then leaned forward until his lips were only an inch from my ear. “Don’t tell my parents, but she saved me when they freaked out, Lily. She’s tough, but without her...” He paused, and I looked at him. His face was so close to mine, all I’d have to do is lean forward and then our lips...
Then I noticed his eyes. They were so sad. So incredibly lonely.
I touched his cheek, and he grabbed my hand and held it against his face. “Without her, I’d have lost it. Give her a chance to help you, too, Lily. It’s all she wants to do.”
I pressed my lips together and tried to understand what he was saying. She had talked my mom into giving me a break from lessons, and she was here tonight, right? Besides if Rafe liked her, then she had to be okay, didn’t she?
The lights suddenly dimmed and Rafe’s mom walked out on stage. “I’d like to welcome you to our traditional Tuesday night Battle of the Ivories.”
Rafe and I turned toward the stage, and I felt Rafe lean back in his chair and rest his arm over the back of mine. Probably because it was more comfortable like that. Not because he was making a move. But still, I knew it meant that he’d felt our connection. Maybe it was just as friends, but it was still there between us, an understanding. Something very cool.
I smiled and leaned back against his arm. Rafe might be dating Paige, but tonight, it was just us. But I realized it was good I was going to the semi with Les. I needed to do whatever it would take for me to stop thinking about Rafe as a boyfriend, because a night like this was just way too tempting. I didn’t want to mess it up by making him think I liked him or wanted him as my boyfriend.
It wasn’t going to happen, and I had to get over it.
Rafe squeezed my shoulder to get my attention, then winked at me. “You’re about to see how piano can be fun,” he whispered.
“Impossible,” I whispered back, but I couldn’t keep from glancing at his tattoo. Longing washed over me. I wanted to feel like that. I really did.
I heard a furious burst of music from my left and I spun around. A guy in a black leather vest and a mohawk was at the piano, playing the most amazing music I’d ever heard. It was fast and frenzied and crazy. I listened in shocked awe while he pounded away. Then he slammed the final cord, and before it had faded, music jumped at me from my other side.
The whole crowd turned back to the right, where a woman in a navy suit was crushing the keys. “Wow! She’s amazing.” I leaned past Rafe, trying to get closer to her.
He grinned and rested his arm across my back as I leaned over him. “Just wait. It gets better.”
“No way.” And then just like that, she stopped playing, and piano music burst from my left. I whipped around again, and the spotlight was on the second piano. There was an old guy with gray hair making the keys come alive with fire and passion. He was standing up, dancing and swaying as he charged through his song, power bursting from his body and from the music.
Then he stopped and the second piano on the right burst into light. I nearly fell on top of Rafe in my effort to see who was playing, to catch a glimpse of whoever it was who was pounding out music that made my insides explode. “That’s your mom!”
He was playing the piano on my back, tapping his left foot in beat with the music. “Yeah. She’s good, huh?”
“Unbelievable!”
Then the music burst from the other side and I spun around again. “I’ve never heard piano like this! It’s like they’re talking to each other!”
“That’s why it’s called the Battle of the Ivories.” He nudged me and pointed to the sandy-haired man pouring out the music. “That’s my dad.”
I bounced on the edge of my seat. “No wonder you’re such an amazing musician! You’re descended from greatness.”
He glanced at me. “You think I’m amazing?”
“God, yes! So much better than anyone else at Mueller-Fordham!” I spun around as the third piano on the right started playing. I gripped Rafe’s shoulder, letting the music wash over me. It was fast and energetic and raging with power. Nothing boring about this! It was alive! All of it! People were shouting and clapping and cheering and some were even on their feet. Because of piano! Out of the corner of my eye, I saw even Crusty jumping up and down and shouting. “This is so amazing. Incredible. I can’t believe it!”
The instant Rafe’s dad finished, I jumped to my feet with half a dozen other people and started applauding like mad, even as the next pianist leapt into the fray. Rafe stood up, cheering loudly as well. He grinned at me. “Having fun?”
“This rocks!” I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him, my body positively vibrating with excitement. Energy churned through the room as more people leapt to their feet with a roar when the next pianist began to play. “This is the best night of my life!”
His arms went around my waist and suddenly I realized I was hanging onto him. I pulled back, but he didn’t let go. And then we were staring at each other, his arms holding me against him, my fingers in the hair at the back of his neck. The music vibrated through our bodies, and all I could do was stare at him, my heart thumping.
For the longest time, we just stood there, in the midst of all these people. The music was pounding through us. The lights were flashing. The floor was thudding from all the stomping. Music raged through the air. I felt like my body was sizzling with electricity, and I could barely breathe as I stood there with Rafe’s gaze locked to mine. All I could think was that I wanted him to kiss me more than I’d ever wanted anything else in my whole life.
His gaze dropped to my mouth, and my stomach did a triple flip. Was he really going to kiss me? Right there? In front of all those people?
Then he cleared his throat, dropped his hands from my waist and stepped back.
I immediately yanked my hands out of his hair and clenched my fists at my sides.
We stared at each other for another long moment, and then we both shook it off and turned at the same time to face the pianist who was currently playing.
There wasn’t even a single accidental touch between us the rest of the night. But it was still the best night I’d ever had.
Because, for the first time in my life, music came alive for me exactly the way Rafe’s tattoo had painted it, exactly the way he’d said it would. And because something had happened between us that was as amazing as the music itself.
I knew I would never forget it.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
I went straight home from the bar, ran into my living room, parked myself at the piano and tried to imitate what I’d heard that night. I closed my eyes and envisioned Rafe’s tattoo, the colors pulsing like they were alive, leaping off his arm and shooting through the air. I imagined the floor vibrating from all the people jumping in excitement. I felt the pounding in my chest as the music slammed through me, and then I began to play.
I ditched the classical and the rock and just pounded away, going crazy with whatever felt like flying off my fingers. My mom popped her head in once, and I stopped, thinking she was going to tell me to knock it off because it was so late.
But all she did was smile, shut the windows so the neighbors wouldn’t be bothered, and go back upstairs.
So I kept playing.
After an hour, I was drenched in sweat, my heart was racing and I was completely pumped. It was awesome. I couldn’t remember the last time that playing the piano had made me sweat, except in agony, and I wasn’t ready to stop.
At midnight, I pulled out the music from the band and started working on that, closing my eyes and pretending I was at the piano bar and everyone was screaming and dancing and clapping.
At one o’clock in the morning, I swiped Rafe’s cell phone number from the slip of paper he’d left for my parents and called him. He’d understand how pumped I was.
He answered on the third ring. “Yeah?” His voice was groggy and sleepy and I almost hung up. “Who’s this?”
Oh, man, I’d woken him up. I winced, but it was too late now. “It’s Lily. Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up—”
“Oh, hey, Lily.” I heard the smile in his voice, and I immediately relaxed. He was glad I’d called, I could tell. “What’s up?” He cleared his throat and I heard him rustling around.
I grinned and ran my fingers over the keys. “I just wanted to say thanks for tonight. It was awesome. I’ve been messing around since I got home, and I’m having such a blast.”
He laughed, a deep baritone that rolled through me like the pulse of his base drum. “Told you.”
I smiled. “Yeah, well, you were right.”
“I’m always right.”
“You’re a dork.” But I was laughing. “So, I’ll see you at practice tomorrow?”
“You mean today?”
“Yeah, today.” I paused, suddenly not sure what else I was going to say. “So, I guess I’ll go to bed.” I started to hang up and then I heard him say my name, so I put the phone next to my ear. “What?”
“I had fun tonight too,” he said. “Thanks for going with me.”
I grinned. “Sure.”
“My mom called me when I got home. She liked you and wants us to come back some time.”
My smile got all big and goofy, and I spun around on the bench, spinning my feet through the air. “I’d like that.”
“She hasn’t called me in weeks. I think she was glad we went.”
God, how awful not to have your parents call you. My elation faded, and I wanted to hug him again. “Anytime, Rafe. I’ll go with you anytime.”
“Thanks.” He grunted. “See ya.”
“Bye.” I hung up and tapped the phone on my thigh. Why hadn’t he ever taken Paige there? Why me?
* * *
Even though I was totally wiped out from my late night at the piano, rehearsal went great for the rest of the week. Every time I started to get uptight about the music, Rafe just reminded me about the Battle of the Ivories. I’d remember everyone in the audience getting into it, and I’d relax again, reminding myself to have fun.
And it worked.
On Saturday night, by the time we were done setting up the instruments at the middle school for our performance, I was so pumped to be there. It was so different to be prepping for a performance with other people. I wasn’t on my own. I had a team supporting me, and that was the most amazing experience ever. We were laughing and teasing each other, but also helping each other get fired up and get ready. Preparation wasn’t about sitting quietly and tucking in any stray hairs. It was about getting psyched, pumped and energized.
I wasn’t alone, and it rocked!
Everyone in the band seemed to like me, the music was going well, and no one had mentioned Paige all week. Erin was even going to try to get Val and Delilah to come watch the band tonight.
How awesome was that?
Finally, I was cool. Gone were the navy blue dress and nylons. Tonight, I was wearing a pair of tight white pants ripped with horizontal slashes, a fitted white tank top with a sweet half-vest, red lace fingerless gloves, and a kickass necklace that I’d picked up at the mall on Thursday night with Angel. We’d even bought some hair dye, and Angel and I were sporting matching crimson streaks in our hair. I might not have a full arm tattoo like Rafe, but I was totally feeling the power and energy streaking through me. I was so ready to rock the gym!
With only a couple minutes to go until we started playing, I was at the keyboard, messing around while the gym was filling up when Angel sidled over to me. Her fingernails were neon pink, and I grinned. Mine were gold sparkles with black stripes. No jealousy from me today, and it felt awesome.
Angel cocked her head at me as she tuned her guitar. “So, Lily, what’s up with you and Rafe?” Her voice and body language was so casual, but I knew instantly t
hat the question wasn’t. She was digging for info!
Heat flared into my cheeks, and I looked at her in a panic. “What do you mean?” Surely she couldn’t have figured out that I was still crushing on Rafe big time, could she? I mean, I knew we were only friends, but that didn’t mean I’d been able to stop the fantasies about what might have happened if he’d leaned forward at the piano bar and kissed me…
“I mean, what’s up?” Angel asked a little more forcefully.
I cleared my throat and concentrated on wiping some imaginary dust off the keyboard. “Nothing.”
She snorted, leaning over so she was in my space, totally abandoning any attempt to make it seem like it was a casual question. “Girl, you’ve been gawking at Rafe all week in rehearsals, and you two keep having these little secret smiles.”
Really? We had secret smiles? Excitement leapt through me, and I couldn’t keep the silly grin off my face. “Just playing music.”
She grabbed my wrist, and I looked up. She was studying me intently, and her face was way serious. “Rafe’s a great guy. Don’t mess with him.”
“Me?” I glared at her, annoyed that she was blaming me for the energy that had been jumping between me and Rafe this week. It was so a two-way street! “He’s the one with the girlfriend.”
“And you’re the one with the boyfriend.” She let go of my wrist, and some of her hostility faded. “He’s actually fun again, and if it’s because of you...well…” She gave me a speculative look, as if she were trying to figure out exactly what I was all about. “If you make him happy, then I want you guys to be together. But don’t toy with him. If you aren’t serious about him, then don’t get in his head.”
Giddiness leapt through me. I’d made Rafe happy again? Seriously? I had no idea what to say. I wasn’t sure if I could say anything. All I knew was that he made me happy, too, and he’d showed me how to enjoy music this week. Why did he have a stupid girlfriend? Argh!
“Lily?” Angel peered at me. “Do you like him?”
I bit my lip. “He has a girlfriend.”
The Fake Boyfriend Experiment Page 12
