by Daley, Kathi
“She is a pretty special kid, and her concern is a real concern. I should have realized how our moving would affect Grandpa.”
“I have a huge house, so maybe he can move in here with us,” Kyle suggested.
“It would be worth having a discussion with him. He might feel like a third wheel unless we can convince him that we really need him. Maybe we can make a case that we are both so busy that having someone to help out with the cooking and whatnot would be a big help.”
“It would be a help, but I also think we need to be honest with him when we speak to him. He will see through any subterfuge, and I don’t want him to feel like we are making the request for him to move in with us out of pity.”
“Yeah,” I agreed. “That would only hurt him. Let’s have dinner with the girls tomorrow and see if we can get a feel for where they are after they’ve had a chance to think things over. They want to go to that new steakhouse.”
“I think that is a wonderful choice. Perhaps we should bring them by the house first to talk things through. I’m not sure a public restaurant is the best place to try to talk about something so emotional.”
“Okay. I think Ashley has plans with Kristi tomorrow. I’ll check with her in the morning and figure out the best time to bring them over. In the meantime, I’ll come by early so we can work on digging through the information you find this evening relating to the bombing and rebuilding the town’s infrastructure. Have you managed to get into the computer?”
“Not yet, but I’m working on it.” Kyle yawned. “To tell you the truth, I am exhausted. I think I’ll turn in soon and take another stab at this in the morning.”
“Okay. I’ll call you after I check with Ashley and Gracie about their plans.”
Chapter 13
Sunday, November 12
“I dropped the girls off with Jenna, and plan to pick them up at three,” I informed Kyle after arriving at his home the next morning. “We have a dinner reservation at five-thirty, so that will give us time to talk to them about whatever is on their minds. I have no idea what Ashley is up to, and while I know that Gracie adores you, it is very clear that she is having a lot of anxiety about moving into your house full time.”
“How do you feel about moving into this house full time?” Kyle asked.
I wrinkled my brow. “Honestly. I feel conflicted. I love you so much, and I can’t wait to spend my life with you. On the one hand, the idea of sleeping in your arms every night and waking up with you next to me every morning is so incredibly wonderful that I can’t believe that it will soon be my reality. On the other hand, except for a few years between high school and the girls coming to live with me, I have lived at the resort for my entire life. Not living there, not waking up to Grandpa’s pancakes or Dad’s inquiry about my plans for the day is going to seem odd.”
“I get that. And I don’t want to pressure you into anything. We can have a long engagement or a short engagement or whatever sort of engagement you want. I want you and the girls to be comfortable with the move once you finally make it.”
I leaned forward and kissed Kyle on the lips. How on earth had I managed to earn the love of such a totally fantastic guy? He’d loved me through all my moods, all my ups and downs, and all the other relationships I’d had along the way. Of course, I wanted to marry him, and I wanted it to be sooner than later. Now all I had to do was to convince my sisters that living here with Kyle was what they wanted as well.
Once we had settled on our plans for the day, Kyle went into his office to check on the progress of the program he had left running, which he assured me would eventually break the passcode on Harriet’s computer, and I went into the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee. Once the coffee had brewed, I poured two mugs and took them into Kyle’s office. “Any luck?” I asked as I handed one of the mugs to him.
“Actually, yes. I’m in. Now, I just need to find the file where she kept the information relating to the blog. It’s not in any of the obvious places. She may even have uploaded the information to the cloud.”
“If she did, will you be able to find it?”
“Eventually.”
After two hours of trying to be quiet while Kyle worked, I headed over to Jenna’s to pick up my sisters. I quickly filled her in on their reaction to the idea of moving to Kyle’s and, while Jenna was sympathetic, she did remind me that I needed to be strong and stick to my guns if I didn’t want to find myself permanently single. I knew she was right, but when I thought of Grandpa and Gracie’s concern for him, my heart broke.
After we left Jenna’s, we stopped by the resort so the girls could pick up the dresses they’d wear that night, and then we headed toward Kyle’s place. Gracie wanted to bring Pumpkin since Echo was hanging out with Trooper, so I told her that was fine and grabbed his leash and a few toys for the drive. I had to admit I was a lot more nervous about the next few hours than I would have liked. Maybe trying to work out the terms of my engagement to Kyle while we already had so many other things to deal with was crazy. He wasn’t going anywhere. Perhaps we should have waited.
Gracie gave Kyle a sincere yet somewhat restrained hug. I wasn’t sure if she was being careful of his ribs or if she was protecting her heart. Ashley held up her hand for a high five, and then immediately requested to speak to Kyle in his office. I watched the two of them leave the room with a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach.
“Do you know what Ashley wants to talk to Kyle about?” I asked Gracie after they were out of sight.
“No. She didn’t say. Did you talk to Kyle about Grandpa?”
I nodded. “Kyle and I are going to talk to Grandpa. We know you love him, and we do too. We’ve discussed a few options, but I really feel I should talk to Grandpa about those options before we discuss the matter.”
“Does one of those options include us staying at the resort?” Gracie wondered.
Did it? I supposed that having Kyle move in with us would alleviate Gracie’s concerns, but the house was already pretty crowded, and Jenna had been right about the queen bee thing. “No,” I finally answered. “I don’t think that all of us living in the same house would work. Papa and Rosalie are going to be getting married next month. They are going to want their privacy.”
“Are you and Kyle going to want your privacy? Maybe Ashley and I should just move away so we won’t bother you.”
I hugged Gracie. “You are not a bother to either of us. We love you very much, and if you move away, I’m going with you. We are a team, you, Ashley, and me. Kyle doesn’t want to replace anyone; he just wants to join the team. Instead of the three musketeers, we can be the four musketeers.”
Gracie crossed her arms over her chest. She was frowning, but I could see by the look on her face that she was thinking things through as well. Gracie loved Kyle, and I really hadn’t expected push back from her, but I suppose that the change I was asking of my sisters was a big change and they’d need time to process it.
I managed to talk Gracie into heading out onto the deck so the dogs could play on the snowy beach. When she saw how much fun Pumpkin was having, her mood improved significantly. The two of us decided to make snowballs and throw them for the dogs to chase. Since they tended to break into a million pieces once they hit the ground, the dogs’ reaction to chasing a ball, only to have it disappear, was hilarious.
By the time we went back inside, Ashley and Kyle had returned to the living room. Ashley didn’t look angry or even sad, but the look of self-satisfaction that she’d arrived with seemed to have been replaced with a look of contemplation.
“So were you able to ask Kyle the questions you wanted to?” I asked Ashley.
“I did.”
“So are we good?”
She shrugged. “Maybe.”
I looked at Gracie. “Would you like to talk to Kyle alone?”
She looked surprised by my question, but after a mo
ment of hesitation, nodded that she would. I felt my stomach tense once again. Who knew something as simple as getting engaged would be so hard?
“So did your talk go well?” I pried after Ashley and I were alone in the room.
Ashley looked at me, tilted her head, and lifted one shoulder. “It was fine. We are still negotiating, but I think we will be able to come to an agreement.”
“Negotiating? About what?”
“It’s personal. I’m going to run upstairs and change into my dress. I’m starving, and Kyle said I could order anything I wanted.”
Personal? Suddenly, I felt totally out of the loop, which was a feeling, I was not fond of in the least.
Chapter 14
Monday, November 13
“You’re up early,” my dad said when I entered the kitchen a good two hours before I had to get up. Dad had always been an early riser, so I wasn’t surprised to find him drinking coffee at the kitchen table.
“I couldn’t sleep,” I said as I poured myself a cup of the strong dark brew Dad specifically ordered for the resort.
“Can I help?” Dad asked as I sat down across from him.
I wrapped my hands around my coffee and looked across the table. After I moved out, I was really going to miss the early morning conversations we sometimes had. “Perhaps,” I answered.
Dad sat quietly, waiting for me to begin.
“Kyle and I are engaged.”
Dad expressed shock first and then joy. “Congratulations. Kyle is a great guy. I can’t think of anyone I’d rather welcome into the family.”
“Thank you. It’s pretty new, and we haven’t told many people. I want to talk to Grandpa, so I would appreciate it if you didn’t mention it until I have a chance to do that.”
“Of course. I’m sensing that your inability to sleep is tied into this new development.”
I nodded. “I spoke to Ashley and Gracie about it. I knew it would be a difficult conversation, but I didn’t know how difficult. They both love Kyle, but neither are really thrilled with the idea of moving, which I totally understand. It was hard on them when Mom died, and now they are settled in here. You have welcomed them and made them feel at home. They feel safe and comfortable. I’m concerned about upsetting the equilibrium we’ve managed to establish.”
“I can understand that. Change, even change you welcome, can be difficult. Has the prospect of moving made the girls angry? Sad? Scared?”
I wrapped my hands around my mug. “Ashley seems to have turned the situation into some sort of negotiation. I don’t know everything that happened during her private conversation with Kyle, but I have a feeling that she is negotiating for a raise in her allowance, a later bedtime, or any number of privileges she feels he may grant whereas I have not. I’m not totally sure what she was after, but she specifically asked me if Kyle would be able to make decisions without having to check with me if she were to go to him with a question or problem.”
Dad chuckled. “That’s our Ashley. Always working an angle.”
The corner of my mouth quirked up in a half smile. “Yeah, I really shouldn’t be surprised. Ashley does like a good negotiation, but Kyle can handle himself, so I’m not overly worried about her walking all over him, but Gracie… Gracie is really worried about Grandpa.”
My dad leaned back in his chair. “I see. What exactly is she worried about?”
“She told me that Grandpa would be sad without us. That it is taking care of us that brings a smile to his face and gives his life meaning. She didn’t use those exact words, but that was her concern, and I know she is right.”
Dad nodded slowly. “Yes, I would agree with that. After you graduated and left home, he decided his job here was done, and he moved out as well. He told me that he didn’t want to be a burden, which was ridiculous since the house that we all lived in is the same house he built with his own hands. When I pointed that out, he told me that he’d passed the resort and the house on to me, and he no longer considered it his home. He moved into that little apartment in town, and to be honest, I was really worried about him. He seemed to be sad and lonely much of the time, but then your mother was killed in the auto accident, and you and the girls moved in with me. It was a really tough time in all our lives, and we really needed Grandpa’s help. He knew he was needed, so he called me and told me he was happy to come back and pitch in for as long as we needed him. He’s been a different man since the girls have been here. I don’t think that Gracie is wrong to worry about how the move will affect him.”
That was what I figured. “Kyle and I have talked about asking him to move in with us. You and Rosalie are getting married, and I know you would welcome some privacy. It could be a good solution. I just don’t know if he’ll go for it.”
Dad didn’t answer right away. I could see he was thinking things through. I decided to wait for him to work up to saying whatever it was he was going to say. When he finally did speak, I was surprised by what he said.
“I’m happy you found Kyle, and I’m happy you are making plans to build a life with him, and I would never want to do or say anything to dissuade you from that decision. However, if you for one moment think that I’m happy you are moving out, you’re wrong. Yes, Rosalie and I are getting married, but that doesn’t mean I want to trade the life I plan to build with her, for the life I already have with you and the girls. I know that it is natural for children to one day leave the nest, and I suppose that in a way, I’ve been preparing myself for that ever since you entered your teen years, but I’m not sure I even have the words to convey how much I will miss you and the girls. I guess I’m greedy and I want it all.”
“We aren’t leaving town,” I pointed out. “You’ll still see us all the time.”
“I know, but it won’t be the same.”
He was right. It wouldn’t be the same.
“Surely, Rosalie will welcome the opportunity to have the house to herself,” I reasoned. “I know she loves you, but I’m not sure she signed up to have a filled to the brim household, and the mess and chaos that comes with a huge extended family.”
Dad shook his head. “She never really had a family. She lived alone for a long time, and she has told me on many occasions how happy she is to be part of a big happy family. Having said that, it is natural that you would be excited about having your own home with Kyle. I don’t want you to worry about Rosalie and me. We’ll be fine.”
“And Grandpa?”
Dad furrowed his brow. “I’m not sure. He did follow you to South Carolina, so I suppose that experience might open the door to his being receptive to the idea of living with you and Kyle again. He won’t even consider it, however, if he feels like he is a burden. Grandpa needs to feel needed.”
I supposed that feeling needed was a byproduct of the human condition. I let out a long breath. “I wish I knew what to do. I want to marry Kyle, and I want to have a life with him, but if I am honest, I have a lot of very mixed feelings about leaving the resort.” I reached across the table and put my hands over my father’s. “I do worry about Ashley and Gracie and Grandpa. And I do worry about me. Who will I talk to when I can’t sleep if I no longer can wander down to this kitchen where I know you’ll be waiting?”
“You’ll have Kyle. You won’t need me.”
“I’ll always need you. Maybe I’m not ready for this. Maybe Kyle and I are rushing into things.”
“Do you really believe that?” Dad asked.
I paused to think about my answer. “No. I love Kyle. I want to marry him, but I don’t want to upset the apple cart. The girls are doing so well. Everyone is settled, and they have so much support here at the resort. I think that forcing them to move if they aren’t ready would be a mistake.”
Dad took a sip of his coffee. “Have you set a date for the wedding?”
I shook my head. “Kyle wants me to be ready. He said he is willing to wait. He
wants to be sure that the girls and I all have the time we need.”
“Then take it. If you aren’t in a hurry, and Kyle is willing to wait, then take the time you need. I have a feeling that if you let things unfold naturally, they’ll work themselves out.”
“And you are sure that Rosalie isn’t secretly wishing she had the place to herself and would welcome us moving out sooner rather than later?”
“I’m sure. If you aren’t sure, you should ask her.”
I thought about her statement that she wanted to spend as much time with the girls as she could before they grew up and headed off to college. I thought about the sewing room she was planning with Ashley and the smile on her face when she talked about their sewing project. What we had really was pretty perfect, if you eliminated my own pettiness where Rosalie was concerned. I just wished there was a way to keep what we had and build a life with Kyle.
Chapter 15
“Two more laps,” I yelled at the girls in my second period physical education class. Running outdoors was no longer an option with the fresh snow, so I had the girls running laps around the gym. Once they finished here, we’d head into the weight room, where they would build up their biceps while I tried not to worry myself into a stress coma. I loved my chats with my father, but today, our early morning talk had left me feeling even more confused than I had been before the talk. If I only had myself to consider, it would be so much easier, but I wasn’t a solitary tree growing in the middle of an open field. I was part of a complex ecosystem, and as part of that ecosystem, I had the other trees, shrubs, insects, and animals that depended on me to consider. If you really stopped to think about it, every tree in the ecosystem was important. Its presence affected the distribution of sunlight, water, and nutrients in the soil. There really were a lot of variables to consider, and I knew I’d be remiss not to obsess about every one of them.
