by Leslie Chase
That done, he put the Serpents out of his mind. Sitting at Lisa’s kitchen table as she fetched her first aid kit, he half smiled at the old memories it brought up. He’d gotten into more than his fair share of fights growing up, and she’d been there afterward when he needed help.
Not when it was the other boys at school, those fights had never gone so far and Marcus had usually won them anyway. But there were always older guys hanging around, the one’s who’d ended up with the Serpents, and he’d never been one to back down from bullies.
“You didn’t have to do that,” Lisa said, breaking into his reverie as she rubbed an antiseptic wipe over the cut on his forearm. He looked at it critically and knew it would heal up fine in a few days. He’d always healed fast, after all.
“I wasn’t about to let him hurt you,” he replied, shrugging. “I’d never let anyone hurt you.”
“I can take care of myself. I’ve had to, since you left.”
Marcus winced at that - her words stung more than the cut did. “I never meant for you to be alone.”
“Then why did you have to leave?” Her voice was tight, full of carefully controlled emotions, and her hands trembled as she cleaned his wound. “You could have been here, with me.”
“I had to,” he started, and then stopped. It was hard to put his reasons into words, especially when there was so much he couldn’t tell her. So much that had to stay secret while he worked.
“Lisa, I had to figure out who I was, who I am. You know I never fit in around here, and the military gave me a chance to grow and be someone good. If I’d stayed here, I wouldn’t have amounted to much more than another thug in the Serpents, I think.”
She grimaced at that, rubbing the wound with a little more force than necessary. “But now you’ve come back and you’re hanging around with them anyway.”
“I’ve got my reasons for that,” he said. “I just can’t talk about them, not yet. I promise I’ll tell you what’s going on when I can.”
Taking out a gauze strip, Lisa dressed the cut carefully, with the tenderness he remembered, though her voice was still tense. “You are always keeping secrets from me. I don’t like that.”
Marcus sighed. “I don’t like it either, but I don’t have any choice. I’ll tell you what I can, when I can.”
It hurt him to deny her, but there had always been things he needed to keep from her. From everyone. How could he share that he was a bear shifter? He’d never trusted anyone with that secret before he joined the Army. Even then, he’d just had the good luck to be spotted by people who already knew about shifters.
Spending years in a special unit with others of his kind had been the best thing possible for him, and had taught him so much about his abilities and what he could use them for. But one thing that they’d always stressed was that he couldn’t share the existence of shifters with outsiders. There were rules, and with good reason - who could tell how the world would react if they knew about his kind?
The supernatural community had good reasons to want to stay out of sight.
But difficult as he’d found it to keep her in the dark back then, it was a lot harder to keep silent now. Her tender touch made him feel at home, relaxed, in a way no one else ever had, and it would be so easy, so right to simply tell her everything.
He lifted his bandaged arm and flexed it. She’d done a great job fixing him up again, just like she always had. It wasn’t just her skill, he realized. Her presence quieted his mind, let him be at peace. Even the bear inside him was at peace in her presence - the powerful creature inside him, the monster he’d spent years trying to understand and control, was silent.
Not absent; Marcus could still feel the bear there, just beneath the surface of his mind. But it was quiet, resting, in a way he’d never felt in all the years he’d been away from her. The only time it came out was when he’d seen Lisa threatened by Cal - and then, it had been almost too much for him to control.
“I can’t believe how strong you’ve gotten,” Lisa said, packing away her first aid supplies. “That punch… it looked like something out of a dumb action film.”
In fact, it had been an effort not to hit him even harder. The bear inside Marcus had been just as angry as he was at how Cal was treating her, and keeping that rage in check wasn’t easy.
“Learned a few things in the Army,” he said, trying to cover that with a half-truth. After all, without the training he’d gotten there he might not have been able to hold back the change. “Spent a lot of time in a special unit.”
She smiled and nodded, looking pleased. “I guessed you’d be Special Forces. You’re smart enough, and you’re certainly tough enough.”
Marcus grinned back, glad that she wasn’t pressing for details. He couldn’t share much more anyway, no matter how much he wanted to. Their shared smile seemed to touch something in Lisa, and she reached out to brush his cheek with her hand.
Her touch sent a shiver through him, and suddenly he recognized the feeling. It wasn’t new, of course: he’d felt it around Lisa throughout his life. But this was the first time he put it together with the stories others in his unit had told.
Stories about their mates.
The people fate had in store for them. Their perfect partners.
Some of them had scoffed at the idea, others had sworn that it was true. That once a shifter felt the touch of their mate, there was no mistaking it, and that the doubters would understand when they met their own. Marcus had never known how to feel about the idea; the notion had always been faintly uncomfortable, somehow. Like the very idea he might meet someone like that was a betrayal of Lisa.
Now he knew why - he’d already met his mate, he just didn’t know what to call the feeling. Everyone telling the stories had talked about it as meeting someone new.
“Marcus? Are you alright?” Lisa waved a hand in front of his face, looking worried. “You went away somewhere.”
“Sorry,” he said, shaking off his distraction. “Just remembering something from my time in the Army. It’s nothing.”
She tilted her head, assessing him, concern on her face. Marcus smiled again, trying to look reassuring. She looked so beautiful, so wonderful, sitting there in front of him, and he wanted nothing more than to take her away from all her troubles here, all her problems and his. But there was still work to do, and even if he did sweep her away, how could he know how she’d react to finding out the truth about him and his abilities?
He knew that she was perfect for him, but he had to work at being perfect for her before he let her into that secret.
“Let’s talk somewhere a little more comfortable,” he said, taking her hand and squeezing gently as he got to his feet. She looked up at him, a little nervously, pushing her hair behind her ear and biting her lip.
“I’m not sure I’m ready for this,” she said dubiously. “Being alone with you, like this…”
He stopped and let go of her hand, smiling reassuringly. “I’m not going to do anything you don’t want. I care about you far too much for that.”
He stepped back, giving her space. Lisa’s hesitant smile widened, and she stepped closer again, reaching out for his hand and leading him out of the kitchen and into her living room, guiding him to a sofa and sitting down beside him. He reached out to embrace her, pulling her gently against him and felt her relax in his arms as they sat together.
It reminded him of the time before he’d left, and he could feel her remembering too. The long hours they’d spent together, sitting close, talking into the wee hours of the morning or just quietly spending time together. It felt like home.
“I didn’t think you’d be gone so long,” she said eventually, breaking the silence. “Were you in the Army the whole time? I thought you’d just do a couple of years, and then be out.”
He held her tight, feeling her body move against him as she breathed. “I was good at it, and I met a lot of good friends there. It was right for me, at the time. Just like being back with you is right.�
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She twisted to look up at him, and he saw a small smile on her face. The measuring look in her eyes as she tried to get a feel for him. He wondered then what she’d been through while he was away. Things had gotten a lot worse in Coldwood since he left, that was clear, and he’d nearly left it too long before coming home to her.
Maybe if he’d written more, she’d have told him how things were going - but that had been difficult to keep up when he’d had so little he was able to share with her. His unit, his missions, his shifter nature - all secrets he’d had to keep, so their correspondence had slowed and eventually come to an end.
He leaned in and kissed her nose, making her smile wider.
“It does feel right,” she admitted, shaking her head. “But I’m still afraid. What if it all goes wrong? You’re dealing with the Serpents, and I’m not sure I can handle that. But I am sure that they won’t just let you walk away from whatever business you’ve got with them, especially not now you’ve punched one of them out. I can’t see how this goes anywhere good.”
“It might be tough,” Marcus said, “but I don’t believe that there’s any problem between us we can’t fix. We’ll find a way to make things work.”
“I’d love to be that sure.” Lisa held him tight, and he could feel her warmth as she rested against him. “You make it sound so easy. But it isn’t, not like this. Not when you’ve been gone for so long.”
“I know it won’t be easy,” he said, brushing a hand through her hair. It was so soft and bright, like golden silk. “But I also know that we can manage it. And I won’t leave you again.”
“You can’t know how much I missed you,” she said, relaxing into him as he stroked her hair.
“Sure I do. I missed you just as much, every day.”
“Really? All those years and there was no one else?”
“No one,” he assured her. “I could never think about anyone else the way I think about you. No one could live up to you, Lisa. That’s why I had to work so hard to be good enough for you.”
She laughed, softly. “You were always good enough for me, silly. Always. And now you’re back, and I’m still just this small town girl.”
“Now who’s being silly? You’re beautiful, and perfect.” Marcus leaned down to plant a kiss on the top of her head, inhaling the scent of her hair. For a moment, he struggled with the desire to abandon the plan. To tell her about himself and run off with her into the night and leave Coldwood and the Serpents and everything else behind.
But that wouldn’t work, he knew. He was here to help the whole town, not just his mate, and he’d hate himself if he abandoned the place when it needed him. There was still Hazel to think about, and everyone else. It wasn’t in him to turn his back on them, even if Lisa would go along with it.
And he doubted she would. She had a core of steel, and turning her back on her family and friends wasn’t something she’d go along with, no more than she’d abandon him. That was one of the things he loved about her.
Taking a deep breath, he focused himself. No matter how much he wanted to tell her everything, he needed to be a soldier for a little longer. Complete the mission first, then he could put all this behind him and concentrate on his mate.
Lisa snuggled into him, her head against his chest, her warm soft curvy body pressed against him. She chuckled softly as he sighed with happiness.
“Do you really think I’m pretty?” Her voice was low, quiet, peaceful. “I never knew for sure. You’ve always been handsome, tall, strong. Now you’re a Special Forces veteran, too. I’m just average.”
“Are you fishing for compliments?” Marcus grinned. “You should know better. You’re more than pretty, you’re beautiful, and brave, and strong. You’re holding your own against the Serpents, you’re looking after your mother when she needs it. You’re the light that’s led me home, Lisa, and you’re so much better than I am.”
He shook his head. “It’s easy to be brave when you’re a big, tough guy like me. Standing up to trouble when you’re not, that’s real strength, and you’ve got that.”
Lisa took his hand and brought it to her lips, kissing it gently. Her touch made him shiver, electricity shooting through him.
“It’s nice that you see me like that,” she said. “But it’s not fair. It’s not true. I’m just, just trying to live up to what I thought you’d want me to do.”
He turned her face up to look at him, meeting her eyes and feeling a jolt of connection between them.
“You did that, you know. Better than I could have imagined. I’m proud of you.”
Bending over her, he kissed her on the lips. Her mouth opened under his, and he felt her body tense then relax as she returned his kiss.
5
What am I doing? Lisa’s mind spun out of control as she kissed Marcus on the lips, feeling his strong, rough face against hers. But despite her confusion, one thing was clear in her mind. She wanted this. She wanted him.
Pulling back just enough to break the kiss she looked into his deep, dark eyes, and felt the connection between them which distance had never quite broken. There were good reasons not to want him right now, but she didn’t care.
“Marcus, I’ve been so alone without you,” she whispered, letting her hand run over his cheek, feeling his stubble under her palm. “I didn’t realize how much I missed you ‘til you were back.”
“I missed you too,” he answered, and she could hear his sincerity. His strong hands lifted her gently, and he turned on the couch, laying her back on it. Leaning over her, he kissed her again, and she felt her body heat with the touch of his lips, her reluctance melting.
“I love you, Lisa,” he whispered into her ear, kissing her there too. “I have always loved you, I think, and there’s no other person in the world for me.”
“No one? In all the years you’ve been away?” She couldn’t quite believe it. Despite the fact that she’d not had any interest in anyone else while he was away, Marcus was a man, and she knew what men were like.
“Never,” he assured her. “I knew I was coming back to you.”
His teeth caught the lobe of her ear and tugged, making her gasp and writhe under him. Heart racing, she reached up to stroke his face again. There was no deceit there, no dishonesty, and she couldn’t doubt him. Not now, not here.
His tongue flicked against her and her breath caught. It felt so good, so unlike anything she’d imagined. She closed her eyes, letting the sensations wash over her, feeling his solid weight above her.
Pulling back, he rose over her, and she noticed his breathing was rough, too. Am I having the same effect on him that he is on me?
She felt his hands, so powerful yet so gentle, on the top button of her blouse and gasped, her eyes flicking open. Marcus paused, meeting her gaze, and she looked up at him uncertainly.
“Tell me to stop, and I will,” he promised. “I don’t want anything you don’t.”
She bit her lip, feeling herself flushing bright red as her mind warred with itself.
Of course I want you to, you idiot, she wanted to scream, but instead she found herself gently pushing his hands back. He let go instantly, starting to get up.
“Wait,” she said, looking him in the eyes. He was flushed too, she saw, struggling to control himself. “Just… wait a minute.”
“I can wait however long you need me to,” he said, stopping in place. “I am here for you, not for one night. I don’t want to push you into anything that you’ll regret doing.”
For a moment they stayed still, watching each other. Lisa’s breathing was quick, ragged, and Marcus’s broad chest was rising and falling quickly. Tentatively, she reached out to him, pressing the palm of her hand to his chest and felt his heart pounding.
“This is a lot to take in,” she said. “But I’ve wanted this for so long. I’m not going to regret it.”
He smiled, and for a moment there was no barrier between them. None of the reasons that this might be a bad idea mattered. He reached up and
took her wrist, gently removing it from his chest, pushing it down to her side. As tender as his touch was, she could feel the strength behind it, and found herself pinned to the couch by him.
“Okay then,” he said, voice low, hungry, and eager. The control he’d exerted on himself before was slipping, and she shivered with anticipation as he growled at her.
She squirmed, testing his grip, and found herself helpless in it. Her breathing sped up, and she gasped at the delicious feeling of vulnerability his grasp brought her. He lowered himself over her and kissed her again, a powerful deep kiss, their tongues meeting hungrily.
Then his lips left hers and trailed down to her neck, making her whimper and arch under him. The little kisses he planted each sent a shock like lightning flashing through her, lighting her up inside.
Pressed against her, she could feel him hardening in his jeans, and wanted so badly to see him. But he was taking his time, kissing his way down to the top of her blouse, tugging at it with his teeth. Lisa tried to pull her hands free to help him undress her, but he growled again, a deep and dangerous sound which kept her still as his teeth closed on the top button.
With a jerk of his head, he ripped it away. Then the next, and the next, until her blouse hung open and her body shook with desire.
His kisses trailed down her body again, across the tops of her ample breasts, down her ribs. It was as though he was savoring her, enjoying the taste of her. And her body was responding with a wildfire of desire, her flesh trembling where his lips passed. Each kiss made her breath catch, her heart pound, her legs tremble.
His rough, unshaven face rasped the skin of her belly as he kissed lower and lower until he reached the top of her jeans and paused.
Looking down at him, Lisa saw Marcus grinning at her as he kept her pinned, her body shaking with desire. “Is this what you want, sweetheart?”
She nodded, biting her lip, not trusting herself to speak. This was everything she’d dreamed of and more.
