Curiosity shot through him, but he wasn’t about to ask what she meant. He had to remind himself that he didn’t care anymore. Again.
Kevin’s expression brightened then, and it was as though his ire of moments before had been forgotten as he grinned hugely and said, “You’re just in time. Dad’s just put the steaks on the grill. Brats are set to go on in five.”
“I hope you have plenty,” Billie said.
“Teddy called to whine about how he couldn’t make it,” Kevin told her, his grin growing wider.
“At which time he volunteered to go with me later to take the guys a few dozen brats,” Andy added.
Kevin shook his head. “No, I volunteered you, big brother.”
“And I just returned the favor, kid brother,” Andy replied.
Out of the corner of his eye, John caught Billie grinning. He didn’t have any brothers or sisters himself, so he didn’t know what it was like to feel that kind of joy in simply watching your siblings bait each other. He was glad she got a kick out of it. It reminded him, much to his dismay, that there was a softer side to her. A caring side—he saw on her face a degree of the same tenderness she had shown him in his apartment when they’d been in his bed together.
So where the hell had it gone just a few hours later?
Caught up in his musings, he’d missed Andy and Kevin turning back for the house. Billie turned to him then and said, “Believe it or not, I’m actually glad you’re here. I need your help.”
Annoyed that he’d started to let his indifference slip, John replied with more bark than was necessary. “Now there’s a fuckin’ surprise.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Don’t be a jackass. You’re the one who told me that you were going to see this through to the end whether I liked it or not. If that’s still true, then check your attitude here at the curb and join us out back so you and I can talk like adults.”
He laughed derisively. “That’s a rich one, coming from you,” he said snidely. “You weren’t in a mood to talk this morning. Or listen, for that matter.”
Naturally, their rising voices had drawn the attention of her brothers, both of whom drifted back toward the pair. Billie glanced at them, then back at him as she placed her hands on her hips. “This isn’t even about that—there are more important things to consider at the moment. And now is hardly the time or place to be having that discussion, anyway.”
John unconsciously mimicked her stance. “Is that so? Then if it’s not too much to ask, please enlighten an inquiring mind as to when you can fit me into your busy schedule.”
“Is there something else going on here we should know about?” Kevin asked.
Ignoring the other two men, John stared at Billie, willing her to answer his question. He watched as her hands dropped to her sides and her breath released, her mask falling away for one precious moment.
But it was long enough. He’d seen in that miniscule passage of time the very same emotion he’d glimpsed just as briefly as he held her still beneath him on the floor of his hotel room in St. Thomas, on a morning that already seemed like it had happened ages ago. And deep down, he knew that flash of vulnerability was just as genuine now as it had been yesterday.
“When this is over, John,” she said at last.
That answer, he knew, would have to suffice. He could see that it was all she had to give at the moment, and after all, she was right—there were more important things to be concerned with. So he relaxed his posture and nodded.
“Fair enough.”
TEN
Billie formally introduced John to Andy and Kevin as the four of them headed toward the house. She had purposely avoided responding to the latter’s question, and thankfully he didn’t bring it up again…
…because she really did not want to talk about what was going on between her and John with her brothers.
In the back yard, they found her dad at the grill just starting to lay some bratwursts on the rack. The steaks were already sizzling and making her mouth water; her stomach grumbled in response, reminding her that she’d skipped lunch. After grabbing a wine cooler from the open chest of ice on the ground by the end of the picnic table, she gestured to it and said to John, “Help yourself.”
“Gladly,” he replied, reaching down to grab a bottle of Budweiser. She watched as he twisted the cap off and tipped the bottle to his lips, chugging half of it before coming up for air. Her stomach twitched knowing that she was the cause of his distress, so she tore her eyes away from him to the food laid out on the table.
Her family had gone all out for her welcome home dinner: all the usual picnic accents were there, including potato salad and potato chips. There was also pasta salad, deviled eggs, three different kinds of cheese in cubes, watermelon and honeydew for the group to feast on. And of course, plenty of alcohol to drown it all with—it wasn’t a Ryan barbecue without a couple cases of brew.
Billie picked up a few cheese cubes, popping one into her mouth to chew as she walked over to her father’s side. “Hey Dad,” she said, bumping his shoulder with her own. “Sorry for the unexpected company.”
“He’s been sitting across the street for the last hour,” her father said in a low voice. “I figured he’d be joining us eventually.”
Thomas looked at her then. “Does this guest know anything about last night’s guest?”
He spoke quietly so as not to draw attention, she knew, but Billie still glanced John’s way. He was currently sitting at the picnic table engaged in a conversation about football with Kevin and Andy.
She took a swig of her wine cooler before replying. “Not yet. I’m going to talk with him about it after we eat because I need his help with the team. Hopefully I can secure it before Gabe shows up.”
“He’s coming back?” her father asked, using tongs to turn several brats, and then flipping one of the steaks.
“I hope that’s okay—and I’m sorry for bringing this to your door, Dad,” Billie said. “If I still had my own place, you wouldn’t have to worry. Shit, I should have thought first—”
Her father’s hand on her arm silenced her, and when she looked into his eyes, she saw no reproach—just his love and concern for her. “Sweetheart, what did I say last night about this always being your home?”
His attention turned back to the meat on the grill as he added, “While it might do well for you to refrain from bringing your work home in the future, given the inherently dangerous nature of it, I will not malign you for doing so this time.”
“I need my own place,” she said, taking another drink. “Or an office—then I wouldn’t have an excuse for bringing my work home with me.”
Thomas chuckled and she laughed with him. Her eyes found John again, and she was pleased to overhear the three men at the table still talking sports. She was even more pleased that her brothers were behaving themselves and not grilling John about the heated discussion they’d witnessed in the front yard. While they might be concerned, it was none of their business.
When the steaks and brats were done, Billie helped her father carry them over to the table. After Kevin said the blessing, everyone was more concerned with stuffing their faces than with talking. If her mouth had watered at just the smell, it was positively flooding the moment she put the first piece of steak in her mouth. Her father was a master at the grill, and he always cooked her steak to perfection without fail. It was done all the way through, but still juicy and tender, and the first welcome reminder of what she’d been missing while she was away.
“Remind me never to run off to the Caribbean again,” she said, lifting her fork in her father’s direction. “Dad, you’re the best—the absolute best.”
Thomas grinned and tipped his bottle of Guinness at her. “I aim to please, sweetheart,” he replied.
Conversation was light, much to her relief. Having talked sports with Kevin and Andy already, John appeared to be relaxing. She was glad to see the tension leave him, to note the tight set of his shoulders softening little by little
as the meal progressed. She’d wounded him this morning, and though she would eventually explain the reason why—she owed him at least that much—she hated having to do it. He deserved better than her.
John turned his head her way and caught her staring. Billie covered the action by saying, “Let’s take a walk.”
He nodded and grabbed his beer, standing as she picked up her wine cooler and then joined him. Without explaining to her family, she merely led him away from the patio, toward the end of the yard she and her brothers had long ago dubbed “the cemetery.” All the family pets that had died were buried along the back fence. When they were closer to the fence than the food, Billie stopped and leaned back against a maple tree that provided just the right amount of shade in the summertime for reading a book outdoors.
“So what can I do for you?” John asked.
She looked up at him. “I need to ask a favor of you. Well, more of the CIA, I suppose.”
“What kind of favor?”
“I’ve seen Gabe,” Billie explained. “Last night he came here to the house. Said the others have ghosted but he stuck around because they had a feeling I might be brought in to look for them. Obviously he was right. Gabe explained how he and the team got involved with Wainright in the first place. Why they were foolish enough to say yes.”
John crossed his arms as he took a swig of the beer. “Just out of curiosity, why did they?” he queried.
“Because Wayne’s ex is a conniving bitch,” she spat harshly. “She cheated on him, then had the nerve to accuse Wayne of being unfaithful. He has to fight tooth and nail just to see his kids—who adore the hell out of him, by the way. Wayne’s a damn good father. But Janelle’s all the time making up excuses to keep him from seeing them when he’s on leave. Gabe said that Wainright told them it had to be all of them or none of them, and Wayne’s apparently been saving to hire a good lawyer to sue for custody. Gabe, Eddie, and Darren were just helping out a brother.”
Pausing for breath, she studied John surreptitiously through half-closed eyes as she took a mouthful of her own drink. Surprisingly, he didn’t seem to be angry over the fact that she’d kept Gabe’s visit from him. So she forged ahead, detailing their second meeting earlier that afternoon. John paced away after she’d finished, and she allowed him the time to mull things over.
“So what you’re telling me is that you no longer feel that Wainright is trustworthy?” he asked after a moment.
“All I know is that I didn’t like him from the start,” she said. “And before you say I was prejudiced against him because he used my team, I’ll grant that may have colored my opinion before I met him. It was fairly well cemented after this morning. He seriously tripped my bullshit radar.”
“I have to admit, his not informing the major’s family of his death does come across as strange,” John conceded. “It’s like you said, he could easily cover it up as a training accident.”
“Precisely—so why not just do that? Why keep it a secret that Eddie’s dead? Why try and force the others on the team to continue with the experiment when by all accounts, Eddie’s behavior didn’t skew off the normal scale until after he’d taken part in it?”
John sighed. “So what is it you want me to do, Billie?”
Billie swallowed. “Help me bring the guys in. Gabe agreed they should all be under medical supervision in case what happened to Eddie wasn’t a fluke, but he doesn’t trust General Wainright as far as he can throw him. We need a safe house of some kind, a place where they can be treated if necessary, but without Wainright finding out about it.”
“And then what?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. All I was supposed to do was find them and bring them back. I never thought beyond making sure my brothers were safe.”
“Tell me something…” he began, stepping closer. She looked up and saw that his expression was serious, that he was looking for something from her but she wasn’t sure what.
“You said Wainright tripped your bullshit radar, and that both you and Gabe agreed he has to be up to something to want to keep Eddie’s death under wraps,” he said. “Do you believe General Wainright should be investigated?”
“You can’t do that. The CIA doesn’t conduct investigations on military personnel—that’s what NCIS is for. Or Military Intelligence. An order to investigate would have to come from a higher ranking general, the USMC commandant, or SecNav.”
“I didn’t ask you that,” John countered. “I asked you if you believed it should be done.”
She didn’t hesitate in answering. “I do. I’m not one to read people incorrectly, John. Something is very wrong here. I just haven’t got a damn clue as to what it could be.”
He nodded, then glanced up toward the patio where her brothers were not very subtle about watching them. Billie was surprised to hear him chuckle before he looked back to her, saying, “I’ll get your friends a safe house, Billie. And a good doctor to look after them.”
Relief flooded through her. She hadn’t really thought he would deny her request, but she had wondered if he might be difficult about it. He was angry with her and rightly so… but then they were both adults, weren’t they? They could still be rational and work together in spite of the interpersonal conflict crowding the air between them. That he could maintain his professional ethics in the face of the emotional turmoil she’d caused told her a great deal about him. She sensed now that he had a strong moral code, one that led to his ensuring a job was done even if he and his partner in the endeavor weren’t in complete accord.
The disconcerting thing about that was how much like her, like Travis, he had just become in her mind.
“Did you hear what I just said?”
Billie blinked, shaking herself mentally in order to dispel the sense of similarity between John and Travis. She did not want to go there.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get distracted,” she said. “I just… I’m hoping that getting the guys to safety, and doing it under the radar, won’t be difficult. I don’t know where they are, not even Gabe,” she said. “He’s supposed to come by again later, but I can’t say for sure when.”
“For this to work, I think he’s going to have to give up the location of the other two,” John said. “Will he tell us so we can go pick them up?”
“If you can convince Gabe you’re sincere, yes,” Billie said with a nod. “That is if he even knows. There’s a chance they didn’t tell him where they were going in order to protect him if he was caught while waiting for me to come back. Hell, there’s also the possibility that Wayne and Darren aren’t even together.”
“Fuck,” John muttered with a shake of his head. “If that’s the case, it will make the job just a tad more on the hard side. But I see the sense in it—splitting into the wind in different directions makes them that much harder to track.”
“I could find them, given enough time. We just don’t have it.”
He looked at her with one eyebrow raised. “You seem awfully confident of that—that you could find them, I mean.”
“Why else would I be here?” Billie countered. “We’ve been over this: You were sent after me because Wainright needed me to find them. Even he admitted to that. Having a man who clearly can’t be trusted believing me capable of finding these guys ought to say something about my ability to actually do so.”
“Indeed it does,” John conceded. “And just for the record, I’m not saying I don’t believe you. I have no doubt you’re as good a tracker as you claim to be. I guess I’m just a little disappointed that I won’t get to see you in action.”
Before she could reply, John turned away from her and started walking back toward the patio. “Where are you going?” she asked.
He turned back. “To get the ball rolling,” he told her. “I need to call Rex and have him look into which of our safe houses are available. I’m also going to have him put out feelers to see what can be done about looking into Wainright’s activities. We may not be able to start an officially sanc
tioned investigation, but it won’t hurt to ask a few carefully worded questions of the right people.”
Billie nodded and, in the spirit of maintaining their fragile peace, offered him a small smile. She was not surprised that he didn’t return it before he headed for the house once more, but she was surprised by how much his not doing so stung.
John paused at the picnic table and excused himself to the Ryan men, saying that he had an important phone call to make and had left his cell phone in his car. It was the truth, after all, and having discovered his cell wasn’t in his pocket was rather fortuitous. Making the call in the car eliminated any chance of his being overheard. No matter what came of…whatever it was between him and Billie…he wasn’t about to put her family at risk.
Passing through the gate of the wooden privacy fence around the back yard, he quickly walked down the driveway and across the street to the Charger. Looking in the window, he confirmed that his cell phone was in the passenger seat, where he had tossed it after checking the time right before Billie had appeared. Opening the driver’s side door, he settled into the comfortable seat and closed it, leaning his head back against the headrest with his eyes closed, just breathing for a moment, trying to clear his head of wandering thoughts.
After a full minute or so of settling his mind and his nerves, he lifted his head and reached for his cell phone. Dialing up Rex’s number, he explained what he wanted, which was access to a safe house not too far away and a doctor who could be trusted, as well as an unmarked vehicle they could use for pick-up and transport.
“You do realize I’m just an analyst, right? I ain’t no OO like you,” Rex told him. “Your kind gathers the intel, my kind analyzes that intel. That’s how it works.”
“Yeah, but you’re my analyst,” John said with a grin. “And you’ve assisted me with logistics many times before. I’m sure you can handle this.”
Two Evils Page 14
