by Melody Anne
“I love them,” he said, chortling as he began removing her Rudolph panties.
“Ummm, it was a weak moment,” she said, embarrassed until he kissed her stomach right above the elastic at the top of said panties. Then, he began blazing a trail of wet kisses upward to her swollen breasts.
Crying out when he clasped a nipple between his teeth, she forgot all about the poor red-nosed reindeer. When he lifted her up onto the counter, sending a few dishes crashing to the floor, she wrapped her legs around him, pulling him close.
Once again joining his lips to hers, he quickly removed his slacks and then pressed his body fully against hers. She reveled in the feel of his hardness.
“Yes, please,” she told him.
She heard the ripping of foil and then he was pulling back just a bit, making her cry out in protest until she felt him come close again, and then finally he was pushing inside her.
“Oh, yes.” Desperate for him to drive into her, she cried out her approval as he stretched her open, inch by glorious inch.
“You feel so good,” he groaned as he stalled halfway inside.
“Don’t stop!” she almost wailed. She wanted motion, blessed friction, and she urged him on with her gently gyrating hips.
“Hold on,” he growled, giving her body time to adjust.
But she didn’t want time; she wanted him — now!
For a moment, he clenched his teeth as he looked into her eyes; then he surged forward, burying himself fully inside her heat, making her head fall back as she cried out. If he moved even a little, she knew she would climax. She’d never shattered so quickly while making love. As if he could read her body, he withdrew and drove back in, sending her spiraling over the edge, making her clench around him, forcing a groan to come ripping from his throat.
He drove slowly in and out of her, prolonging her pleasure until the last of her tremors died away. Then he grabbed her head and kissed her deeply as he began to move with long, deep strokes.
Time lost all meaning as his hands explored her body and his mouth ravished hers. The beating of her heart pulsed in time with his movements. The pressure within her began building again as he continued his lovemaking, and suddenly she felt her release first rippling through her again, then rushing headlong through her body as her pleasure spiked.
As she shook in his arms, he groaned, sinking deep inside her again, pulsing, spilling, and then becoming still. His head collapsed against her shoulder as a final shudder racked his body. She tasted the saltiness of his flesh, loved the flush that had stolen over his beautiful skin.
An eternity must have passed before he drew back and looked at her passion-spent face.
“That was unbelievable,” he said as he again caressed her cheek. “I didn’t think anything could be better than the first time we made love, but I was wrong.”
“I never want to stop,” she replied, bending forward and brushing her lips against his, needing this man over and over again.
“A lady after my own heart.” He lifted her from the counter and began moving through his apartment.
“Where are we going?”
“Take a guess. We’re going to continue doing it over and over and over again,” he said with a wicked smile.
“Oh, I must have been a very good girl this year.” She laughed in delight as he set her down on his bed and quickly climbed in after her.
“Mmm, yes, you have. You’re definitely on Santa’s good list.”
“That’s too bad. I kind of like the idea of being on the naughty list,” she said, then blushed.
“This just keeps getting better and better, Ms. Ridgley,” he told her after a pause.
“I can’t imagine it getting any better, Mr. Mystery Man, but I’m more than willing to give it all I’ve got. We could at least try to stay on a roll.”
They didn’t have to try very hard at all.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Merry Christmas, Mr. Storm. You’re a free man.”
Tanner looked down at his monitor-free ankle and sent the officer a withering look. He needed these guys to get the hell out of his apartment before Kyla woke up and found them here.
When this had all begun, he’d been planning on beating the officers out of the building as soon as the ridiculous contraption had been removed. Now, it was Christmas morning and he had a beautiful woman sound asleep in his bed.
He and Kyla hadn’t gotten more than two or three hours of sleep the night before. Still, he felt more energized than he could ever remember feeling. He didn’t know whether that was from a night of great lovemaking or because he was off house arrest, but the ankle device was history, and he could finally return to his beautiful penthouse.
Why wasn’t he just writing her a note and thanking her for a great night, telling her that she could have whatever she wanted from his apartment and that it had been fun, but he was out of here? Sheesh, what a bunch of questions. But he’d gotten what he wanted. There was nothing else for them to say to each other. It was finished.
Of course, he’d never done that to a woman, and he didn’t want to be the kind of man who did. Kyla wasn’t some cheap hooker, and he wasn’t a complete bastard. Or at least he hoped he wasn’t.
Even just thinking about bailing out on her like that turned his stomach. When the officers left and he shut and locked the door right behind them, he found himself wandering back to his bedroom, just standing there in the doorway and watching the rise and fall of her beautifully bare chest as she breathed evenly in her sleep.
She was stunning both inside and out. It was depressing to think that he’d never really looked beyond the externals with any other woman he’d been with. He’d really only cared that they looked good on his arm and satisfied his needs in the bedroom.
Kyla had seemed like a completely new woman last night, much different than the shy woman he’d been with a week earlier. Her confidence with him and with her own body had made her bold and daring, and she’d taken his breath away more than once. She’d teased him once again about leaving his socks on, but he’d found a satisfying way of distracting her when she’d told him she was going to pull them off. The last thing he’d wanted was for her to find the monitor. But that was a nightmare in his life that was now over and done with.
As she began to stir, he left his position in the doorway and went to start a pot of coffee. When it had just brewed, she walked into the kitchen, her hair tumbled and his shirt the only thing covering her, offering him a tasty view of her honey-toned thighs.
“I hope you don’t mind that I borrowed your shirt,” she said, shifting nervously on her feet.
“You look far better in that shirt than I ever have,” he said with a smile before he walked over and leaned down to join their lips for a brief kiss.
“I have to agree. I prefer you without any shirt at all.”
“Merry Christmas, Kyla,” he whispered, his throat uncomfortably tight.
“Merry Christmas, Tanner. I…uh…have a favor to ask of you.” Her voice was wobbly.
He was ready to say that he had to get going, but that’s not what came out.
“Anything.”
“I want to go home — where I lived with my parents, I mean — just to see the place, just for a few minutes,” she said, choking on the last part of her sentence.
“I think that’s a great idea,” he told her, though he really didn’t understand why she’d want to do something like that.
“I know we don’t know each other that well, but I don’t want to go there alone.”
Ah, no wonder she was having a difficult time asking him. Did he really want to go along with this? It seemed too intimate, too personal — more so even than making love. He was walking away from this woman today. He started to tell her no, but once again, the wrong words came out of his mouth.
“Of course I’ll go with you.” What was with his brain these days?
But her sweet smile made it all worth it.
“I’m going to get chan
ged; would it be OK if we went in half an hour?”
When he nodded, she ran back to his room, gathered her clothes, and then opened his front door, peeking out into the hall before crossing over while still wearing only his shirt. He wouldn’t mind if that was all she wore the entire day.
Shaking his head, he went and grabbed a change of clothes, then jumped into the shower. She would return within minutes and he was glad, because if he had too much time to think about this, he would find a way not to go with her, and though their time together was over, he needed to grant her this one final request.
Tanner didn’t know why it mattered, but he wanted her last memory of him to bring a smile to her face. If she were to hate him, he didn’t think he could bear it. He was going to leave her, though, so why should her feelings matter at all?
By the time he climbed from the shower, he still didn’t have any answers.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Kyla trembled as they stood on the front porch of her family’s home. The dried out and browned Christmas wreath still hung in the center of the door, testifying that this home had been a tomb for the past two years. She was so afraid to walk inside — terrified of what would be on the other side of the heavy wooden door.
“Take all the time you need.”
Kyla jumped at the sound of Tanner’s quiet voice. They hadn’t said much at all since she’d returned to his apartment to find him ready to go. And now she’d been so lost in her thoughts that she’d forgotten his very existence.
Was this a mistake, she wondered, coming here on Christmas morning? If so, when would be the right time? If she was going to do this, now was as good a time as any.
Because her fingers were shaking too badly to insert the house key in the lock, Tanner gently took it from her hand, set it in the keyhole, and turned. The sound of the long-unused lock clicking open seemed louder to Kyla than a rifle shot. He didn’t touch the knob, just waited to see what she would do next.
With a deep, fortifying breath, Kyla opened the door. The entryway was dusty and decorated with cobwebs, the pictures on the walls barely visible under a film of grime, the floor dull with all the dust. No one had set foot in the house since a few days after the three tragic deaths, when her parents’ attorney had arranged to have the food removed from the house.
He’d told her it was to keep the smell away and the rodents out. She hadn’t cared about anything at that time and told him to do what he wanted. But when he’d said he would remove the Christmas decorations, too, she’d freaked out, screaming at him to leave them alone.
Later she’d apologized, but he was a kind man and had never tried to make her feel guilty about her behavior. He had offered to have a cleaning service take care of the house, but she hadn’t wanted anyone inside, feeling that it would be an invasion, an insult to her mother. So the attorney had the lawn taken care of, the outside of the home looked after, but no one came inside.
Kyla’s and Tanner’s shoes left marks in the dust covering the floor as they walked inside, and dust motes danced around them in the thick, stale air. She found herself drawn to the family room, where a brown tree stood tall with some decorations still clinging to its brittle limbs, and some broken on the floor, the weight of the ornaments just too much over so much time. Finally, sitting beneath the once lit tree, were many wrapped gifts, all of them covered in dust.
“I’m so sorry, Kyla,” Tanner whispered as he stood behind her, lifting his hand to place on her shoulder.
“This is how I feel inside — dead and broken,” she said as tears welled up in her eyes.
Those gifts had been picked out with love, some of them for Kyla, some for her brother, and some for her parents.
With a few steps, she stood in front of the tree and sank down to the dirty floor, her hand reaching out as she touched one of the once brightly wrapped gifts. Picking it up, she ran her hand over the top of the package, wiping away the filth that covered its beauty.
“This one is for my brother. I got it for him. It’s a football jersey for the Washington Huskies. He would have opened it and laughed, telling me there was no way he’d wear a jersey from a rival school, but he would have worn it when he got homesick. We were close, closer than most siblings. Yes, we had our fights, but we loved each other immensely. We could kick each other’s asses, but if anyone else messed with either of us, we’d jump in and defend the other. I miss him so much,” she said, now not making the least attempt to hide the tears.
“I don’t know what to say, Kyla.” Tanner just sat next to her and wrapped an arm around her.
“There’s nothing to be said. It’s been two years, and yet it feels like yesterday. Why was I the one who got to live? It’s not fair.”
This was something she’d never said to anyone, not the therapist she’d seen for a year, not the police, not the hospital staff — not a single person. Why was she saying it now — to a stranger? Maybe because it was easier to speak with him, someone she knew she wouldn’t see again when this thing between them was over.
It wasn’t a matter of if, but of when it would end.
“It’s Christmas. Why don’t you open this?” he asked as he grabbed a small package and wiped away the dust covering the tag, showing her name clearly written in her mother’s beautiful calligraphy.
“I can’t,” she said, though she took the package from his fingers.
“She would want you to have it.”
“How do you know that? What if she just wants to be home, wants to celebrate the next fifty Christmases with her family, like she’s supposed to?”
“I know she would want you to have it, because if I had a child and I died, I would watch over that kid from above, smile when they triumphed and cry when they fell. I would want my child to go on, no matter what happened. That’s all any decent parent wants for their kids.”
“Do you have kids?” Kyla asked, turning to look at Tanner, really look at him.
He paused. “No, I don’t.” He decided not to add that he probably never would, either.
Kyla looked down at the package, and she suddenly felt herself undoing the paper. Inside, shining up at her from a bed of velvet, was a gold heart-shaped locket with a smaller heart carved into its front.
Her fingers shaking, she opened the locket and found, staring back at her, a tiny picture of her family, one of the photos they’d had taken a month before the accident. On the opposite side was an engraved message: We love you forever and always, Love Mom and Dad.
Kyla smiled and sobbed and laughed at the same time as she closed the locket and struggled to open the clasp on its chain. Tanner gently eased it from her fingers and placed it around her neck.
“How can I go on?” she asked, her mouth trembling as her fingers clutched the golden heart, which rested near her own.
“You have to for your parents’ and your brother’s sake. They wouldn’t want you to mourn them so deeply for this long. They would want you to cry, to say goodbye and then to remember them always. They would want you to live life to the fullest so the beautiful daughter and sister they loved can do all the things they wanted you to do. Weren’t they happy when you succeeded?”
“Yes, my mother was my biggest cheerleader. I would call her almost every day once I moved into the dorms — after a date, after a hard test, after every little milestone. I also came home every chance I got, and she came to visit often. She was my mom and my best friend.”
“Then don’t you think it would tear her apart to know how much you’ve given up?”
Kyla thought about his words. Yes. It would rip her mother apart. She would understand that Kyla needed to mourn her family’s death, but she wouldn’t understand Kyla giving up living altogether. Kyla knew she had been mourning too long now.
“Thank you, Tanner. Thank you so much. I need to be here alone. I know I asked you to come, but I want to be home for a while, to feel close to my family. You can go back to the apartment now. I appreciate that you came, but I need to do this
.”
“Are you sure, Kyla? I don’t know if I should leave you here feeling like this.”
“I’m fine, Tanner. I need to say goodbye.” For the first time in two years she believed that she would be okay.
“Then I’ll respect that. But…”
“What, Tanner?”
“I know this isn’t the time…”
Kyla looked at him levelly. “Just tell me please.”
“I’ve had a wonderful time with you during the last three weeks; more than you could possibly imagine, and that’s saying a lot for me. I don’t normally spend so much time with one person – one woman, more specifically. And I need you to know that your memory will always be special to me. But you’re right that I don’t belong in that apartment building. And I really don’t belong to anyone.”
“And?”
“I don’t believe I ever will. If I keep seeing you, I’d just lead you on.”
“I understand, Tanner. And don’t worry about it. If I can say goodbye to my parents and my brother, I can surely say goodbye to you at the same time.”
Tanner stood up and helped her to her feet as he wrapped his arms around her. “Goodbye, Kyla,” he said before leaning down and kissing her.
She tried to say it back, but the word wouldn’t come out through her tight throat. It didn’t matter. From the first moment she’d felt the connection with Tanner, she’d also known he would never be hers to hold.
Would she ever see him again, even once? When he let go, something inside of her knew this was the last time, that when she returned to the apartment building, he’d be long gone. His eyes looked regretful, but they also looked determined. She could change her mind, plead for him not to leave, but she’d known exactly how this affair would end. She’d known all along that he wasn’t a person who fit into her world.
He said nothing else as he turned and left her alone in the family room. The sound of the front door opening and closing had such finality. Kyla sat back down in front of her dead Christmas tree and she wept for the last time, saying her final goodbye to her family and also to the stranger who’d come into her life to help her heal and who had left just as quietly and just as quickly as he’d shown up. Maybe he hadn’t even been real at all.
