‘Allie kissed a girl,’ Zoe said.
‘What?’ Rachel blinked.
‘She’s going to be famous.’ Zoe sounded pleased.
Rachel’s eyes moved up to Allie’s face and her eyebrows arched skyward.
‘You know that thing you didn’t come to tonight?’ Allie said. ‘That was smart of you.’
Rachel held the door open. ‘Inside. Both of you.’
She must have fallen asleep reading – books were still piled on the bed near the pillow. Now she swept them out of the way as Zoe sat cross-legged on the floor, eyes wide as if she were watching an exciting film. Allie sat backwards on the desk chair, leaning her chin against the tall back, while Rachel climbed back into bed, pulling the duvet up to cover her bare feet.
‘Start at the beginning.’
Speaking quickly, Allie told her about the night. When she got to the part where Katie asked her about Lucinda, Rachel’s breath hissed between her teeth.
‘How did she find out?’ she murmured mostly to herself. ‘I haven’t heard a thing.’
‘Well, everybody knows you’re my friend,’ Allie said. ‘Maybe they don’t talk to you about me any more.’
Rachel waved that away. ‘Yeah, but I eavesdrop.’
‘You’re the most important legacy student at the school now,’ Zoe said matter-of-factly. ‘More important than Sylvain.’
Allie looked at Rachel. ‘There’s no way this doesn’t spread to the whole school, is there?’ Futile hope suffused her voice, but Rachel’s look told her to give up.
‘Sorry, babe. You’re outed.’ Rachel stretched out her legs under the covers. ‘Now tell me the rest. Did Pru get her tits out again? She’s so predictable.’
Walking into the half-empty dining hall late the next morning, Allie kept her head high and her eyes straight ahead. Selecting a table in a far corner, she pulled a book from her bag and pretended to immerse herself in studies as she ate her cereal. She could feel eyes on her. Hear whispers. She didn’t know how much was real and how much of it was in her head but it didn’t really matter – the impact was the same.
When someone pulled a chair out across from her and sat down a few minutes later she froze, her spoon halfway to her mouth.
‘Allie.’ Reluctantly she looked up to meet Jo’s blue eyes, which today looked clouded and serious. ‘I think we should talk.’
Balls.
Setting her spoon down, Allie clutched her tea mug like a shield. ‘Sure.’ She kept her voice diffident. ‘What’s up?’
‘Why didn’t you tell me who you are?’
Allie’s head dropped until her chin touched her chest. And so it begins.
‘It’s true, isn’t it?’ She could hear the hurt in Jo’s voice.
Allie nodded. Jo’s quick intake of breath was audible. ‘That’s huge. And you never told me. Why, Allie? I’m supposed to be one of your best friends.’
‘I didn’t know,’ Allie said, knowing how unbelievable it sounded – how much like a lie. ‘Until I went home after summer term. And then I promised not to tell.’
‘But you told some people.’ Jo’s voice was accusing. ‘You told Rachel, didn’t you? And Carter.’
‘I told only those I had to tell. Only a very small number of people know.’
‘A small number of people,’ Jo said. ‘But not me.’
‘Jo, please,’ Allie said. ‘It wasn’t personal. I didn’t want anyone to know at all until …’
But Jo didn’t wait for her explanations. ‘I’m so glad it wasn’t personal.’ Pushing her chair back with a squawk, she stood up, her shoulders stiff. ‘That makes me feel so much better about everything.’
As she walked away, Allie dropped her head into her hands.
My whole day, she thought glumly. My whole day is going to be like this.
A few weeks ago, she would have gone to Carter for refuge. They would find somewhere to be alone and he would have shielded her from the worst of the attention. But those days were over.
She was going to have to take care of herself.
When she walked down the grand hallway she moved in a cloud of whispers, curious sideways glances and stares.
In the end, she retreated to the library, where the thick Oriental rugs absorbed the rumble of gossip. At the librarian’s desk, Eloise was staring at a document, a pen in one hand.
‘I’d like to use one of the study carrels, please.’ Allie tried to sound casual, as if she asked this sort of thing every day.
‘Technically those are for final-year students,’ the librarian began, but seeing Allie’s desperate expression she changed her mind, ‘and good students like you who helped clean the library after the fire.’
Reaching into a drawer, she pulled out a small key on a silver ring. ‘The third carrel is free. Use it for as long as you like.’
‘Thank you.’ Allie could hear the relief in her own voice. The librarian had obviously heard it too, and she looked at her with concern.
‘Is everything OK?’
‘No,’ Allie said, turning away. ‘It really isn’t.’
Getting the key turned out to be the easy part. The carrel doors were virtually invisible, tucked into the heavily carved oak panelling on the library walls so skilfully no join could be seen. She felt along the carved squares, acorns and roses until she found a straight crack that had to be a door frame. From there she could find her way down the wall slowly looking for similar cracks until she found the one she thought was the third doorway.
Then she had to find the lock.
By the time she finally found it tucked in the heart of a flower, she was frustrated and angry. Angry at herself. Angry at Carter and Sylvain. Angry as hell at Katie. And not thrilled about the stupid panelling.
The door opened with a nearly silent click. When she flipped the light switch the room sprang into life – vibrant colours from the mural that covered the walls formed a rainbow of rage that suited her mood.
This mural showed people facing each other with swords and pikes at the ready alongside a stream flowing through a verdant field. Clouds roiled overhead, with menacing cherubs holding vicious-looking golden bows and arrows. Everybody was shouting at everybody else.
Flinging her bag to the floor with a reverberating thud, Allie paced the confines of the small room, her hands tugging her hair. ‘What am I going to do?’ she muttered to herself. ‘How do I deal with this?’
She dropped into the chair behind the desk and lowered her head on to her arms. Everything seemed to have fallen apart. How had Katie found out about Lucinda? Nobody would have told her. Certainly not Isabelle, Rachel or Carter – and they were the only ones who knew.
A knock at the door interrupted her fretful thinking. It was most likely Eloise; some more senior student probably needed the room. She was already arguing her case when she opened the door. ‘Eloise, I’ve only been in here a few minutes …’
When she saw Carter on the other side, her words faded away. She hadn’t been this close to him since the night they broke up. Somehow seeing him was everything she wanted and the last thing she needed, at the same time. For a split second she wondered if, by some miracle, he’d forgiven her and things could go back to the way they were before. Then she saw the jaded look in his dark eyes and she knew that was just a dream.
As she stared at him, stunned, he gestured at the room behind her.
‘Can I come in or do you just want to stand here?’ The impatience in his voice jarred her and she jumped away from the door.
‘Sorry. Come in.’
He looked around the room as he stepped past her, taking in the bag she’d hurled earlier, which now spilled books and papers on to the floor. Glancing up at the furious mural around them, he muttered, ‘How appropriate,’ before throwing himself into the chair in front of the desk.
His straight dark hair fell forward over his eyebrows and he shoved it back with an absent gesture she’d always loved. For a moment she thought her heart would shatter in her chest, lik
e glass dropped on stone. But it kept beating for some reason.
Standing with her back against the door, she took a deep shaky breath. His eyes flickered up to her. ‘I thought we should talk.’
His calm but distant voice chilled her as she walked to the desk and sat down across from him, her back held very straight.
‘How … How are you?’ Such a stupid thing to say but she really did want to know.
‘I’m great, Allie, thanks.’ His smile was sardonic. ‘My girlfriend is running around in the woods with other guys and doesn’t trust me enough to be honest with me. But otherwise things are good. I aced my history essay.’
‘Carter, I—’
‘I didn’t come here to hear your explanations,’ he said, cutting her off. Then he stopped. ‘Or maybe I did … I don’t know.’
For a second she saw a raw pain in his face that matched her own. Unable to bear it, she looked down at her hands and noticed they trembled slightly. She shoved them down on to her thighs.
‘I just saw you walk in here and I had to come and talk to you.’
She was still staring at her hands and he raised his voice just a little.
‘Look at me, Allie.’
Reluctantly, she raised her eyes to his. The pain she’d seen was gone, replaced by icy blankness.
‘I heard what happened at the bonfire last night.’
She felt ill. ‘I … But nothing …’
‘I’m not talking about you making out with Nicole and having some sort of scene with Sylvain, although we can discuss that if you want,’ he said coldly. ‘I was talking about what Katie said about Lucinda. I wanted you to know that I never told anybody about Lucinda, and I never would.’
She looked up at him, eyes wide with surprise. ‘I never thought you did.’
The strength of her reaction seemed to catch him off guard, and for a second his eyes flickered. But all he said was, ‘Good.’ Then he moved as if he were about to stand up. ‘Well, I guess that’s it.’
‘Carter, wait.’ Without thinking she leaned forward across the table, reaching out as if to hold him back. He recoiled from her touch and, cheeks flaming, she withdrew her hand. ‘Can we just talk for a second?’
‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea,’ he said but he stayed in his seat.
‘I know I haven’t been completely fair to you and I’m so, so sorry. But you haven’t always had faith in me either. We’re such good friends, but …’ She held his gaze. ‘I’ve been thinking a lot about this, and I think we weren’t the best couple. You don’t trust me to make good decisions. And I don’t trust you enough to tell you things. And I know that’s caused our problems.’
‘Not just that,’ Carter snapped. ‘There’s also Sylvain.’
A hole seemed to open in her chest. ‘Yes.’ Her voice dull, she leaned back in her chair. ‘There’s also Sylvain.’
‘The thing you never realised is that how you feel about him is written all over your face. You go … still, when he walks in the room. Your whole face changes.’ He laughed bitterly.
‘Carter,’ Allie said, ‘Sylvain saved my life. If I … care about him, it’s because of that. Not because I fancy him or whatever it is you think.’
‘You know what’s sad?’ Carter looked tormented, ‘It’s just so bleeding obvious to everyone except you that you like him.’
He stood suddenly, and walked to the door, then stopped with his hand on the doorknob. He spoke his last words with his back to her. ‘You’ll have to forgive me if I don’t enjoy watching this little love story play itself out.’
When he was gone, Allie dropped her head into her hands. All she wanted to do was cry. But the tears wouldn’t come.
By the time Allie ran into Katie that afternoon, she was poised for a fight. When she saw that familiar red mane ahead of her in a quiet hallway she ran to catch up, grabbing her by the sleeve.
‘How did you find out?’ Allie asked before Katie had even turned to face her.
‘Like I’m going to tell you.’ Jerking her arm free, Katie took a step away from her.
Her lips were painted a warm shade of apricot that perfectly suited her colouring. Allie hated that Katie’s beauty made her feel insecure even now.
‘The fact is, you lied to people,’ Katie continued, ‘and now people know you lied and you have to deal with the consequences of your own action. I don’t see how that’s my fault.’
Anger made Allie shake. ‘How is not telling people something private about my family a lie? What business is it of yours or anybody else’s?’
At first other students swirled past them as they argued but then a few, clearly sensing a fight was brewing, stopped to watch. Soon a crowd grew.
Katie looked bored. ‘You were asked more than once whether or not you were legacy and you said no. Darling, it doesn’t get any more legacy than Lucinda Meldrum and I find it hard to believe you didn’t know that. So the real question is: why did you lie?’
When Allie hesitated, she smiled, sensing victory. ‘You can tell us, Allie.’ She gestured at the watching crowd. ‘We won’t tell a soul. Why did you keep your family connections a secret?’
‘Because it’s none of your bloody business,’ Allie snapped, her cheeks burning.
Katie rolled her eyes. ‘That’s hardly an answer. And it’s everybody’s business now.’
‘Thanks to you.’
‘Yes.’ Katie smiled. ‘You’re welcome.’
Looking in her eyes, Allie knew this argument was pointless. She would never reveal her source – she was enjoying this too much.
Defeated, she turned to walk away, but Katie’s parting words sliced through the air after her. ‘Why don’t you run and cry to Sylvain? Oh wait.’ She covered her mouth. ‘Should I have said Carter? No. I’m sorry, which one of them is it this week?’
When Allie whirled back towards her, fists clenched, Katie’s green eyes widened. ‘Oh no! Are you going to punch me?’ Her laugh was patronising. ‘Grow up, Allie. You’re pathetic.’
‘She’s pathetic?’ Nicole’s silky voice took them both by surprise and Allie whirled to find the French girl standing beside her, eyes flashing at Katie. ‘I think you’re mistaken, Katie, about who is the pathetic one here.’
Somebody sniggered. Flustered, Katie glanced at the watching crowd before regaining her equilibrium. ‘Oh, Nicole, this is ridiculous. I know you snogged her but what’s going on here? Are you actually in love with her or something?’
Nicole tilted her head, her glossy dark hair falling over one shoulder as she studied Katie as if she were slithering across the floor. ‘I think the problem here is not who I kissed or who Allie kissed, but who you want to kiss. And who doesn’t want to kiss you.’
An ugly red flush crept up Katie’s neck to her face; she stared at them, open-mouthed. All her vindictive rhetoric seemed to have left her.
Allie too had lost the gift of speech, and turned to Nicole, wide-eyed. The brunette smiled as cheerfully if they’d just been chatting about the weather. ‘Come on, Allie,’ she said, stepping away. ‘There are more interesting people to talk to.’
‘Uh … Thank you, Nicole.’ Allie said lamely as she stumbled after the brunette. Nicole’s gait was light and quick – despite her tiny size, she moved fast and they’d left Katie far behind in seconds. ‘I might have punched her.’
‘Oh, Allie.’ Her smile was angelic. ‘It was my pleasure. I despise Katie Gilmore.’
They walked through the crowds of students purposefully, although Allie had no idea where they were going. ‘Listen,’ she said, ‘about last night …’
‘It was fun, wasn’t it? Everyone was shocked.’ Nicole giggled. ‘But it’s so easy to shock English people.’
‘The thing you said …’ Allie cast a sideways glance at her ‘…about Sylvain. He’s not your boyfriend?’
Stopping, Nicole turned to face her, full lips curved up. ‘Sylvain and I have been friends since we were six years old. Our parents have summer houses near each other.
We played together in the sea when we were little then we went to school together. And when we grew up we …’ she made a vague gesture ‘… experimented with dating. But it didn’t work out. It felt strange kissing him, you know?’ She wrinkled her nose. ‘It was like kissing my brother. So now we are best friends.’ Her dark eyes seemed to miss nothing. ‘I thought maybe you would like to know that.’
All around them students talked and laughed in the busy hallway but Allie couldn’t really hear them any more.
‘You think … I should …’ Her voice trailed off.
What am I asking?
But Nicole answered her unfinished question without hesitation. ‘I think sometimes it’s easy to think too much about things. Sometimes you just need to listen to your heart. Trust your instincts.’ She pointed at the door next to them. ‘Now, I have to go to a science seminar. Do you want to come?’
Allie shook her head. ‘No thanks.’ Her tone was absent. ‘Thanks again for …’
Nicole shrugged, pushing open the door. ‘I told Sylvain the same thing.’
‘It was Katie’s parents.’ Isabelle poured boiling water into two cups as Allie draped herself, morose, across the chair in front of her desk. A bergamot-scented steam filled the room. ‘She spoke to them on the phone yesterday, ostensibly about the winter ball. They must have told her then.’
‘But how did they find out?’ Allie accepted the cup of milky tea Isabelle handed her, holding it absently as the headmistress sat down in the chair next to hers.
‘That’s where it all gets a bit complicated.’ Isabelle’s tone made Allie nervous. ‘You see, the entire board knows, Allie. Lucinda has decided not to keep it a secret any longer.’
‘What?’ Allie’s hand jerked and hot tea spilled on to her leg. Swearing under her breath, she wiped it away with her hand. ‘Why?’
‘After Nathaniel’s latest attempt, Lucinda decided to tell the board what he’s been doing – everything he’s been doing.’ When Allie stared at her blankly, she sighed. ‘There’s a lot going on within the organisation that you don’t know, Allie. What’s happening with Nathaniel is bigger than this.’ Her hand swept around to take in the room. ‘Bigger than Cimmeria. Bigger than anything you can imagine. We’re just a tiny part of it. Tiny, but crucial.’
Night School: Legacy Page 24
