“It makes me sick to think about having to leave the band, but the more I think about it, the more I realize I have no idea what I’m getting in to. I don’t know the first thing about being a vampire, let alone trying to hide it from the guys. I’m a musician, not an actor. I still don’t know how you hid it so well from me.” Trey sighed again, his frustration radiating off of him. “Even if you tried to teach me everything I need to know to survive in your world, we’ll be going on tour soon and I don’t know if I could go out on the road like that. I just don’t know how I would pull it off. I don’t think I’m strong enough.”
I led him over to a large piece of driftwood and sat down. Trey sat next to me, burying his toes in the sand. “Look,” I said. “I haven’t mentioned this because you’ve had enough to deal with, but I was wondering just how upset the guys would be if I came on the road with you.”
His eyes bore into mine and I thought I saw a glimmer of hope in their blue depths. “Are you serious?” he asked in surprise, unable to hide the smile that was playing on his lips. “You would do that?”
“It’s going to be a big adjustment,” I said, agreeing with his earlier concerns. “You’ll need someone to help you through it. Plus, you’ll also need fresh blood every few days like I mentioned, and finding donors might be difficult at times. Your maker is really the only vampire you can drink from and I thought…” I bit my lip, watching him. “Unless you don’t think it’s a good idea.”
He stared at me, but I couldn’t read his expression. “No, it’s not that. I … I just don’t see how I could ask you to pack up your life and come on the road,” he said.
“I need to do it,” I insisted. “Call it redemption for putting you through all this. For Wes … for everything. It’s the least I can do.”
“But what about your art? The Waking Moon? I could never ask you to leave all that behind.”
“As you well know, I can haul my supplies and an easel just about anywhere and paint to my heart’s desire. As for The Waking Moon … I have Kacie to run things for me here. I’ll just supply her with pieces from the road. It’ll be a little tricky but I think it’s doable. And besides, you’re not asking. I’m offering … if you’ll have me.”
He wrapped his arms around me, hugging me to his chest. “I can’t imagine anything better than having you by my side.” His voice was muffled in my hair. I laughed softly, relieved that he wasn’t rejecting me, and enjoyed the feel of his hand running over my hair. “Plus, I don’t want to do this without you.”
“I’d hate to see you try,” I said.
“Guess you and I will need a separate bus, huh?” he said, pulling back to show me his lazy half-smile. “The guys are gonna think I’ve lost my mind.”
I gave him a quick kiss before resting my head in the crook of his neck. “You’re in love with a vampire. You have definitely lost your mind.”
Chapter 57
Two days later I was sitting at the snack bar in my kitchen while Aurora opened the lower oven to check on the garlic bread that was baking there.
“Don’t vampires have a thing with garlic?” I asked.
She dipped her finger in what was left of the garlic butter she’d spread all over the French bread and sucked it off. “I still can’t figure out where that rumor started.”
I smiled and said, “You really don’t have to do this, you know.”
“I know.” She grinned at me and wiped her hands on a towel. “Apparently somebody has to intervene to get all of you guys together to deal with what happened to Wes. I’m determined to help you all get past this, even if it means I have to pretend that I can still cook my dad’s lasagna.”
“There doesn’t seem to be any pretending involved.” She’d tossed all the ingredients into the grocery cart at the supermarket like it hadn’t been more than a week since she’d cooked this particular dish, although she insisted it had been more like five years.
“It’s the photographic memory,” she said casually. “It works with recipes, too.”
“It smells great. Thanks.”
“Don’t thank me until you’ve tasted it.”
I was tempted to ask where she’d gone when she’d left to feed last night. She’d only been gone about twenty minutes, which seemed pretty fast considering she’d had to find someone to feed from. In the end I decided not to ask. I was still getting used to the idea of vampires being real. I wasn’t sure I could handle hearing the details of how my girlfriend had sucked blood from someone just yet.
I admired Aurora as she bustled around in my kitchen, looking entirely too domesticated for the lethal beauty that she was. My mind wandered back to conversation I’d had with my mom a few hours before. She’d called to see how I was doing. She knew Wes’s death was hard on me and she wanted to fly down for the funeral, but she was coming down with the flu and I insisted she stay home and take care of herself. I’d told her about Aurora a little while back, but of course she didn’t know my new girlfriend was a vampire. She asked if she could say hi to Aurora and I’d handed my phone over to her to let them talk. They’d chatted for almost twenty minutes, Aurora assuring my mom that she was taking good care of me. Since I’m the only thing they have in common, I was pretty much the topic of conversation until the call ended, but I didn’t mind. The fact that my mom and Aurora could talk like that when they’d never even met was definitely a good sign. It made things that much easier, knowing that the woman I would be spending eternity with got along with my mother.
I was only pulled from my thoughts when Aurora turned to look toward the front door an instant before Cowboy started barking. “They’re here.” She waved me toward the door and I grinned and got down from the stool to answer it.
“Hey,” O’Shea said as I opened the door.
“Hey guys. Come on in,” I said, stepping back to let them in. None of us had seen each other since the police station. I knew Aurora was right; we needed to deal with Wes’s death as a group. The truth was that I was afraid getting together to talk about Wes would only make it that much more real. The guys filed in the house and Jonas scooped Cowboy up into his arms and held him just out of licking distance.
“Something smells good,” Chase added as I closed the door behind him.
“That’s the smell of real food,” O’Shea said, slapping Chase on the back.
“You cooked?” Jonas asked, scratching behind Cowboy’s left ear before setting him down again.
“If it had been up to me you’d all be eating take-out tonight. You have Aurora to thank for saving you from that.”
We rounded the corner and walked into the kitchen where Aurora was setting the table.
“You’re just in time,” Aurora said with a smile. “The lasagna is almost finished. Have a seat.”
“Lasagna,” Chase said longingly, patting his stomach.
We all sat around the table, except for Aurora who insisted that I sit down and relax while she brought the food out. There was a moment of silence while she went to the oven to get the lasagna. It wasn’t an awkward silence, necessarily, but it was obvious we were all ignoring the gihugic elephant in the room.
I wasn’t the only one relieved when Aurora returned with a big pan of lasagna. We all started dishing the food out while Aurora went back to the oven to get the garlic bread. She sat in the empty seat next to me and gave me an encouraging smile. Once everyone had a plate of food, the conversation was easier and naturally turned toward Wes. We talked about how we’d first met him, and the day we’d signed legal documents to make him our manager. We laughed about all the times we’d pranked Wes on the road, and how he’d never really managed to get even. We had a lot of fond memories of Wes. We’d known him for years, and trusted him with our entire careers, and he’d never disappointed us. In another moment of silence while we all at least pretended to be chewing a bite of food, O’Shea finally broached the subject.
“It’s hard to believe he’s actually gone,” he said, staring down at his plate.
There were several mumbled “Yeahs” including my own before O’Shea looked up again.
“I don’t think its hit me yet,” Chase added.
“Me neither,” Jonas added.
Then my brothers all looked to me, awaiting a response. I felt Aurora’s supportive hand on my knee under the table. I cleared my throat.
“I … uh … I’ve been in denial since it happened.” In some ways it was the truth. The memory of holding Wes’s lifeless body in the pouring rain, of pumping his chest, was something I had been pushing to the back of my mind. If I thought too hard about it, about how real it had been, the finality of it, I’d only find new reasons to blame myself for Wes being dead.
“You haven’t heard anything more from the police, have you?” O’Shea asked me. I shook my head. “What if whoever did this to Wes was really after you?”
“I’ve been thinking about that, too.” Chase added. “They could still be after you.”
“Don’t worry about me, guys,” I said. “I’ll be fine. Really.”
“Sure, man. Whatever you say,” O’Shea spoke confidently, but I could tell by his expression that he wasn’t so sure.
Jonas, who had been quietly chewing a bite of garlic bread, asked the dreaded question. “What are we going to do without him?”
My stomach dropped and I took a sip of water to drown the sick feeling that was rising in me.
“Where do we even start?” O’Shea asked. “Wes handled … well, pretty much everything.”
“We just have to keep going,” I said at last. “That’s what Wes would want us to do. First things first, we finish the record. We’re nearly done anyway.” I forced my voice to sound calm and determined. “We finish recording and then we dedicate the album to Wes. We’re still the same guys who managed to get a record deal just out of high school. We can do this. And it’s not like we’re alone. We still have Ken, and we still have the label behind us.”
“We’re going to need someone to take over Wes’s responsibilities,” O’Shea stated somberly.
I sighed. I hadn’t wanted to be the one to bring up replacing Wes, but O’Shea was right. “Next week we’ll start work on the record again. We can interview new managers while we do it,” I said.
Everyone nodded in silent agreement. I looked over at Aurora who gave me a small smile. She’d been right about us needing to get together tonight to face the situation as a group. We were strong and we’d manage somehow. I leaned over and kissed her on the cheek, hoping that she knew how much it meant to me that she was here. The uncertainty of my future loomed before me, hazy and full of shadows. Aurora was the only thing in focus. She was the light. She was the one who would anchor me through the storm that would only end with a full moon and a new beginning.
Chapter 58
Wes’s funeral took place just four days after I’d found him in my front yard dead. The Florida sun beat down in direct contrast to the setting and the mood. Aurora stood next to me in a little black dress, gripping my left hand during the graveside service. O’Shea, Jonas and Chase were all standing on my right. Lisa sat with Wes’s mother and father in front of the crowd that had come to honor him. Ken and Serena stood just behind me, along with the head of Celebrity Dent and his entourage.
As the priest who was leading the small service talked about how death is really just a new beginning, my mind wandered to the bag of letters sitting at my feet. The record label had brought the bag of letters which were written by Catalyst fans who shared fond memories of Wes. He’d always been good to the fans, doing what he could to get as many people as close to us as possible. The rest of the guys and I would present the letters to Lisa and Wes’s family after the service.
The media buzzed about Wes’s death. Aurora and I couldn’t leave my house without spotting photographers lurking up and down the street. Some of them were so bold as to walk right up to us and put microphones in our faces asking questions about Wes. O’Shea, Chase and Jonas were all experiencing the same thing. Two weekly magazines had already printed cover stories about the ordeal and all the local news stations were talking about Wes and the band. Wes would have hated all the fuss, which is why the rest of the guys and I had turned down an invitation to hold a press conference about him. We did want the world to know what he’d meant to us, though, as a band manager and as a friend, so we’d gotten together the day before and written a statement about Wes and how much he would be missed. When we’d finished, O’Shea had given it Celebrity Dent’s P.R. guy to release to the media, and for the head of our fan club to post on our website for all the fans to read.
The priest finished speaking then, and Lisa and Wes’s parents had their turn laying flowers on the casket. Aurora squeezed my hand and then gestured for me to go forward while she waited with Jonas’s sister. The guys and I walked forward and added the roses we’d been wearing as honorary pallbearers to the arrangement of flowers on top of Wes’s casket. We stood together there for a moment in silence, and I fought against the tears that stung my eyes.
“We’re going to miss you, man,” O’Shea said softly, speaking for all of us. I bit my bottom lip and put my hand on his shoulder. The tightness in my throat made it almost impossible to speak. After a moment Aurora stepped up next to me, laying a rose on the casket and taking my hand in hers. I gave her hand a squeeze, feeling like I could breathe a little easier with her at my side.
Chase picked up the bag of letters and we all walked to where Lisa was standing with Wes’s family. Fresh tears ran down Lisa’s cheeks as she greeted us with genuine appreciation. We hugged Wes’s mother, who on more than one occasion had made sure we were all well-fed and rested during the recording of our first record. We shook hands with Wes’s father, surprised as always by how much Wes looked like him. We spoke with Lisa and Mr. and Mrs. Leavy for quite some time, sharing fond memories of being with Wes. Chase gave the bag of letters to them with the promise that we’d make sure that the rest of the letters, which were still pouring in, got to them as well.
By the time the service was over and everyone was saying their goodbyes, I felt a sense of peace about Wes’s death. The survivor’s guilt I’d been experiencing for two days lifted and I was committed to honoring Wes’s memory in a way that would make him proud. We were talking with Ken, Serena and the guys about when we should hit the studio again to get back to work when Aurora turned to look over her shoulder at someone and then squeezed my hand.
“I’ll be right back,” she said quickly. I didn’t have time to ask where she was going before she started across the grass.
“Monday works for me,” Ken said, drawing my attention back to the conversation.
“Okay,” I said, a little distracted. “Monday it is.”
I watched as Aurora approached a man in an expensive suit who was leaning against a tree fifty yards away. I didn’t recognize him at all. At that distance I couldn’t tell what she was saying to him, but she didn’t look happy to see him.
“Hey,” I said to Ken and the guys. “I … I gotta go. I’ll catch you all at the studio Monday, okay?” Then I turned and headed in the same direction Aurora had gone. As I drew near I noticed the symbol sewn into the breast pocket of the stranger’s suit jacket. It was the same symbol the men who had come to the restaurant with the Synod had been wearing the night they’d taken Aurora with them. This man – er, vampire – was obviously part of the Emissary.
“Is there a problem?” I asked as I stepped up to Aurora’s side.
“If there were,” the vampire said with an easy smile, never taking his eyes off Aurora. “What makes you think a human could solve it?”
I opened my mouth to respond but Aurora interrupted by touching my arm and saying, “No. Damir was just leaving.”
The vampire named Damir looked surprised. “Was I?” Aurora looked at him expectantly. “Perhaps we should ask your pet here what he thinks of my offer,” Damir said, turning to look at me for the first time.
“What offer?” My heart shifted a
nxiously into high gear, which only pissed me off because I knew he could hear it.
Damir looked truly amused as he raised an eyebrow at Aurora. “You haven’t told him.”
Chapter 59
“Told me what?” I asked, my voice rising a little more than I intended.
“Nothing,” Aurora insisted as she grabbed my arm and turned away, pulling me with her.
“My offer to guarantee your safety, human,” said Damir from behind.
Aurora’s footsteps paused and I stopped with her. I furrowed my brow in confusion as she turned slowly to face me. I wasn’t expecting the flash of pain I saw in her green eyes.
“What offer?” I asked again, my voice just above a whisper.
Aurora’s tortured eyes didn’t leave mine, but she didn’t answer. I touched her face, hating that she looked so miserable.
“It’s quite simple, actually,” Damir added, instantly appearing at my side. “I’ve promised Aurora that I can guarantee your safety and the safety of the other humans you’re so attached to, though I can’t imagine why.”
I looked at him incredulously. My intuition was screaming at me that something was seriously wrong. “What’s the catch?”
Damir gave me a wry smile and nodded toward Aurora. She was staring at the ground but forced herself to look up and meet my gaze.
“Me,” she said. “I’m the catch.”
Before my mind could even process what she was telling me, Damir was talking again.
“You see,” he began. “It’s really best that a vampire with Aurora’s talents align herself with someone in a position of power. I’m sure she’s enjoyed this little fling with you, but can you really expect her to spend eternity with someone who wants to spend the rest of his life living out a childish rock star fantasy? You’ll get your immortality. That is what you want, after all. And you won’t have to worry about putting any more of your friends in the ground.” He gestured toward the small crowd still standing around Wes’s casket.
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