I shook the memory away. This was the memory that mattered the most—my dad surviving a tsunami heart attack, my dad alive.
I took the glass away after he’d had enough to drink. I set it on the table, then I faced him, told myself I wasn’t going to cry, no matter what, but I did anyway. Then I said the thing that I had been hoping I could tell him, ever since he had collapsed at my school, the thing that had been burning in my chest like a fever, like an ache that wouldn’t go away.
The thing that I should have said this morning and every morning.
“I love you, Dad,” I said.
“I love you too, baby girl,” he answered in his rough, paper-thin voice.
He lifted his hand and he placed it on top of mine.
And I felt it. The tsunami rushed away from us. It retreated, as far as east is from the west, until it didn’t even exist anymore. Dad was safe now and that was all that mattered.
Part Three
I shall go the way of the open sea,
to the lands I knew before you came,
and the cool ocean breezes shall blow
from me the memory of your name.
—Adela Florence Nicolson
Chapter 44
Caleb:
Brianna helped us navigate through the hospital, from the front lobby to the elevator, then down a series of winding corridors where every room looked exactly the same. Riley and I would have gotten lost on our own. The human world—with its unnatural textures and smells—felt alien. Even when it was marked and labeled with their numbers and letters, it still seemed chaotic. Disorganized.
Empty.
I longed for the movement of the sea, the dark colors and currents, the ever constant presence of life around me, the schools of tiny fish, the kingdoms of coral. This world left me cold.
Except when I looked in Kira’s eyes.
That was when I heard waves crashing, felt water lapping against my skin.
I felt at home.
Brianna started to jog and Riley took my hand, as we tried to keep pace. She was struggling to keep her human skin. Pale green scales glistened across her cheekbones and, in these dimly lit hallways, her eyes began to glow, pale blue and opaque.
“We will find him,” I told her.
She nodded, gills forming at the sides of her neck, speech tangling in the process.
“Don’t change,” I warned her, “not now, not with humans all around us.”
Her head lowered into the shadows and when she lifted it again, her flesh was once again pale. Just in time too, for up ahead a cluster of humans waited outside an open door. Sean stood among them and he turned toward us, a suspicious gaze in his eyes.
Then an old woman turned too, her long gray hair braided and coiled about her head. She stared at us, squinting as if the shadows were deceiving her and she needed to see more clearly. She took a hesitant step forward, shoulders hunched with age, then she dropped a bag that she held in one hand. Long thin needles spilled out, a ball of yarn rolled across the floor. But she didn’t seem to care.
Her arms opened, outstretched, and her eyes glistened with fresh tears.
Riley picked up her pace until she sprinted away from me.
“Gram,” Riley said, her voice cracking.
Then the two of them embraced, arms wrapped about one another. Meanwhile everyone else stared at them, mouths open.
All except for an elderly man who dressed in black, a white collar around his neck. He merely nodded and smiled, as if he had been expecting this all along.
Chapter 45
Kira:
Suddenly the ground swayed and tipped. And even though all the windows in Dad’s room were closed, I caught a whiff of ocean spray. I had to grab onto one of the railings on the side of Dad’s bed to keep from falling.
“What’s wrong, Kira?” he asked.
I glanced at him, realizing all the things I hadn’t told him. That I had turned into a sea monster at school today and Gram had helped me turn back, that a group of wild Selkies had invaded Crescent Moon Bay and one of them had tried to drown me the other day.
That all of his fears about me turning out to be like my mother were coming true.
I glanced toward the hallway, but couldn’t see anything. Still, I knew that Riley had to be somewhere nearby.
“Nothing’s wrong, Dad,” I lied. “I just spilled some water on the floor and I must have, um, slipped in it. Hey, Uncle Bill and Uncle Charlie and Gram are out in hall. I should go, let them come in and see you.”
He nodded, his eyes closing.
I kissed him on the cheek. Then I headed toward the door, planning to find Riley and thank her for wrecking my life.
•
A large huddle of people crowded outside Dad’s hospital room. I headed toward them, evening shadows changing their features, making them unrecognizable. The floor pitched beneath me again when I crossed the threshold and my knees buckled, but I rode it out this time, like I was on a surfboard, like I was finally on top of the wave for once.
Brianna was the first one that came into view. I paused, surprised to see her. Sean must have called her without telling me. She pushed her way toward me and I could tell that she’d been crying. She wrapped me in a big hug and she didn’t let go for a really long time.
“I’m sorry, Kira, I’m really sorry,” she mumbled and I knew that she meant it.
But when I lifted my head I had a wider view of the hallway. The shadows had been defeated. Fluorescent lights ruled now, all foreheads and cheekbones painted in garish tones. At first glance I noticed that there were more people here than before.
Then I realized who else was here.
Caleb and Riley.
And for some strange reason, Riley had been crying.
Right now, my nemesis stood talking to Gram, both of them in a tiny huddle away from the others. My heart raged, wild and furious, and everything was shaded in red and purple.
“What is Riley doing here?” My voice came out like a growl, low and threatening. My eyes narrowed and my blood ignited. Sean pushed through the crowd and he laid a cool hand on my arm, tightening his grip as if he knew what I wanted to do. Then he did exactly what he was supposed to.
“What’s going on, Brianna?” he asked.
“I had to bring her,” Brianna said, her eyes brimming with tears. I could see the struggle deep inside her and for a moment, I understood. She hadn’t been able to refuse Riley. But that didn’t mean I had to accept it.
“Let me go,” I told Sean.
“No.”
Apparently he didn’t understand. I was telling him, not asking. But he still wouldn’t let go, even when I faced him.
“Look at your grandmother, Kira,” he said, keeping his voice low.
Gram stood with her back to me, and as I stared, she put her arms around Riley. I couldn’t hear what they were saying to each other, but they acted like they were old chums. Riley melted into Gram’s embrace and, at that moment, a surge of jealousy chilled my heart.
“Let me go,” I said again and this time Sean released me. Still, he kept stride with me, almost as if he planned to stop me before I made any foolish mistakes.
But the only foolish mistake here had already been made. Some idiot had allowed my worst enemy, who wasn’t even human, inside the hospital. And that was fine with me because she was going to need a doctor by the time I was done with her.
A few quick strides and I stood in front of her, just waiting for Gram to let go so I could personally thank this sea witch for almost drowning me the other night. But Gram didn’t let go. When their embrace finally ended, she kept one arm around that dratted Selkie’s shoulder. Chin held high, as if silently saying, don’t even think about challenging me, girl, Gram met my gaze.
“Kira,” she said, her voice trembling. “This here—” She paused, wiping her eyes with the palm of her hand. “This here is your sister, Katie.”
I shook my head. The stress of Dad’s heart attack must have been messi
ng with Gram’s head. Or maybe she’d been sipping from a flask tucked away inside one of her knitting bags—
“Did you hear me?” Gram asked.
“I heard you,” I answered, confused. “Are you feeling all right, Gram? Maybe you need to sit down. Or maybe one of the doctors could give you a sedative or whatever they do when people—”
Gram waved her hand. “I’m as right as I ever was, child. Nothing wrong with me.”
“But Katie’s dead, Gram. And this—” I pointed at Riley like she was a rabid beast that needed to be put down. “—this thing isn’t even human—”
“Don’t talk like that about your own flesh and blood!” Gram snapped, her voice raised, her eyes cold.
Sean took my hand and held it.
“Ms. Callahan, you’re not making any sense,” he said. “Everybody knows that Katie is dead. This day has been really rough on Kira. Maybe we should all sit down for a minute—”
“It’s been rough on the whole lot of us,” Gram said. “I’m sorry for yelling at you, child, but you need to know. What I’m telling you is true.”
“It doesn’t matter if she believes you or not, Gram,” Riley interrupted then, her eyes gleaming with dark light, reminding me of that night in the cave. “Daddy will recognize me when he sees me. Just like you did.”
“No, he won’t,” I said. “Because you’re not my sister. Katie’s nothing but a skeleton on the bottom of the ocean.” But even as I said that, the gears in my head started shifting. I suddenly remembered Caleb telling me that my mother had been a Selkie. If that was true, then my sister must have been half-Selkie, just like I was. She could have survived being underwater for a long time. I glanced at Brianna and Caleb. Both of them had been silent throughout all of this.
“It’s not true, is it?” I asked them.
They both looked away, like they were ashamed.
“But she’s the one who tried to kill me, Gram,” I argued. “The other night in the cave, she tried to drown me—”
“I turned you,” Riley said, venom in her voice. “I knew you wouldn’t die. I didn’t want you to go through—”
“That’s enough,” Gram said. “Both of you. We have things to discuss, but this isn’t the place or the time. Your Uncle Bill and Uncle Charlie just went in to see your father.” Her gaze traveled from me to Riley and then back again. “The three of us will go in next and tell him the good news. And I’ll do the talking, understand?”
“Gram, Dad just had a heart attack.” I was unsuccessfully trying to keep the whine out of my voice. “Are you sure this is the right time to tell him—”
“I said that’s enough, young lady. Not another word.”
I crossed my arms and glared at everyone. Nobody was on my side. I could tell that all my cousins had been trying to listen in and now they whispered among themselves.
I pulled away from my family, suddenly noticing that every one of them was dark haired and wild. My older cousin, Dave, with his DUI and missing teeth; my younger cousin, Jill, with the baby she bounced on her hip; my uncle Charlie, who always borrowed money from Dad to keep his souvenir shop afloat; and my uncle Bill, who always charmed older women into taking care of him. Even my favorite cousin, Celia, was a high school dropout with dreams of someday becoming a make-up artist on monster movies. We were all misfits, in one way or another. Even Gram with her paranormal society and Dad with his dead Selkie wife.
And yet, somehow, even in this crowd of eccentrics, I still felt like I was the outsider.
Chapter 46
Kira:
The sun had set. I could feel it. And when it did, an unnatural chill had crept into the hospital. Like a river, it swept through every corridor, it drowned every one of us. Made us numb and cold and stiff. We weren’t talking to one another—that’s hard to do once you’ve drowned.
When the tsunami comes, you may as well give in.
Let it carry you out to the ocean deep.
Learn to dwell with the scavengers on the floor, learn to swim with the current.
I was trying, I really was. For Dad. I didn’t want to drag him under again, didn’t want his heart to betray him and stop. So I did what Gram wanted. I walked back into Dad’s hospital room, kept quiet while I stood beside that monster who looked a little bit like me, the one who kept pretending to be my dead sister.
At first I thought he wasn’t going to wake up and that was perfect. If he didn’t wake up, then he wouldn’t see Riley, and I could keep pretending that this was all some kind of hallucination. I started counting the beeps his machines were making, then imagined that one of the nurses had come in and told us that visiting hours were over. And all the while, I refused to look at Riley.
That beast.
Even with my face turned forward, I could see how her body had tensed up, how she had inched closer to his bed until she stood right beside him. She was going to be the first thing he saw.
Then he woke up.
He took a deep breath, his eyes fluttered and he mumbled something that I couldn’t hear. Gram stepped forward, took his hand and started telling him. I had to give her credit, she did a good job. The whole thing sounded almost believable when she said it out loud, when she included all the Selkie bits and pieces that no one had ever told me before.
His brow creased, as if he was confused at first.
Meanwhile both Gram and I kept watching all of his monitors, making sure everything stayed the same.
Then she told him who the monster-who-looked-like-a-girl was.
His pulse rate accelerated, his heartbeat sped up. I gripped the side rails on his bed, just about ready to scream for one of the doctors. But then everything settled down. He saw her. My monster sister.
He hugged her. Both of them cried. Correct that, all three of them cried.
I watched.
They all rejoiced as if they had just killed the fatted lamb. Look, the prodigal daughter has finally come home. I stood there for a few minutes, feeling as left out as I always did at high school.
Then I turned and walked out of the room.
•
The moon swung like a pendulum through the trees on the drive home. I wasn’t talking. To anyone. My mouth had been sewn shut. From the moment my dad became her dad, I hadn’t wanted to say another word. Ever.
Sean walked me to my door, but it’s hard to have a conversation with a statue.
He tried, but all he said was stuff like, you’ve always wondered what had happened and where your sister was.
But I still didn’t know what had happened. And today I lost my sister all over again. That thing called Riley was not my Katie.
Back when Gram had said goodbye to Riley at the hospital, my sister’s eyes had glistened, but not with tears, it was as if I had seen a hidden ocean—waves tossing, sailors drowning—and all the while she had grinned.
Had that been my imagination? Or had I truly seen something dark and deadly in her eyes, something she wanted to keep secret but couldn’t?
The porch creaked beside me as Sean shifted his weight. “Are you going to school tomorrow?” he asked, eyebrows raised.
I shook my head.
“You want some company?”
I shrugged, which in code meant, heck, yeah.
He nodded. “I’ll come over at about nine, okay?”
“Whatever.”
He grinned.
“What?” I asked.
“You finally talked.”
“You’re lame.”
“No, you are.”
“Shut up.”
His grin broadened and he started to laugh.
I sighed. “You must be brain dead. I called you lame and told you to shut up and you just laugh.”
His gaze softened and he coiled a strand of my hair around his finger. “That’s because I’d rather have you mad than quiet.”
“I’ll try to remember that.”
“No, why don’t you try to remember this instead.”
He cupped his other
hand along the side of my face, then he leaned in until his body pressed against mine and my back rested against the porch railing. His lips met mine, soft at first, then they were filled with wild-dance-all-night-long-music and for a moment, I couldn’t tell where his body ended and mine began. I drank in his scent, felt my pulse thrumming in time with his. Then I became dangerously aware of every inch of his skin against mine.
That was when he pulled away, when he whispered in a deep voice.
“Good night, Kira.”
“You’re kidding, right?” I managed to say. One kiss? One wild keep-me-up-all-night kiss and he was leaving?
But he was already at the edge of the porch. “See you tomorrow.”
I sighed. I hated to admit it, but he was right.
He had definitely given me something to remember.
Chapter 47
Kira:
It was a dream and it was my life, all rolled up into one. Ocean currents filled my room, gave me goose bumps, made me curl beneath my blankets. They forced me awake, but in reality I was still dreaming. My window hung open and our house now sat on the bottom of the sea. I felt like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, except I was watching manta rays and sea urchins swim past. I opened my front door and walked outside, leaving Kansas and my black-and-white world behind.
Every color sang: blues were bluer, greens more green and reds so vibrant you could almost taste them. I slipped across the threshold, no longer walking, mesmerized by the beauty of it all. My house sat on a street alongside other homes, although they were fashioned from coral and abalone; they glistened and shimmered with each current of light that passed by.
And there, in the distance I heard a familiar sound.
Weeping.
Someone was crying, and the sound caused me to almost double over in pain. The beauty around me grew pale and insignificant next to this wail that swept down our curved street. I found myself swimming toward it, but along the way I noticed that everyone else was swimming in the opposite direction, an expression of fear on their faces.
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