I laugh. Penny’s never looked more beautiful.
A new energy thrills through me, ignites me. I take two quick steps toward him, wait for his kick. It comes, I duck it, grab his leg, twist him around, and throw him down. He lands face first, palms out, and I twist him over again, grip his leg in between my thighs, and hold onto his ankle, and twist.
He’s in a leg lock, and each time he throws a punch toward my leg I twist his body so he misses, so his hits lose strength.
I stare into his eyes. Penny’s watching, and this fucker isn’t going to beat me.
I pull the leg, twist the leg, and I feel the stress in his knee. It’s going to pop at any moment. I’m going to tear his anterior cruciate ligament.
Tap out, I think to myself. The ref is circling us, waiting for that moment.
But he’s got a reserve of strength. He screams, sits up, and lands a hit square on my thigh, sending it immediately limp and numb. He wriggles his leg out from me, gets up, but I get up faster; his knee is too painful.
I hit him hard in the jaw, and it’s lights-out.
His limp body slaps the floor.
The crowd explodes.
I search the audience for Penny, but she’s not there anymore.
And so I leave the cage, and head for the exit.
“Pierce!” somebody calls. “You can’t leave. You’re up again.”
“Fuck it,” I shout back.
“You’ll lose your winnings!”
I just huff out a growl. I don’t fucking care.
*
“Wait!”
I turn around, and see him jogging out of the building. He’s in nothing but his fighting shorts. There’s a trickle of blood running down the side of his face, and as he approaches me, passing beneath a street lamp, I see that the stitches above his eye have split.
“What, Pierce?”
“Why are you leaving?”
I put my hands on my hips and laugh. “I don’t really like watching fights. Not my thing.”
“It’s my thing,” he says.
“I don’t care.”
“Then why did you come?”
“I don’t know!”
We stand in silence for a moment. The tension between us as viscous as a honey.
“I don’t like watching you fight,” I eventually say.
“Why?”
“No.” I jab a finger at him. “When I asked you why, and you didn’t answer me.”
“Pen—”
“No, Pierce. You answer me first.”
“I have feelings for you.”
He just says it, and it catches me off-guard. It was what I wanted to hear, but I didn’t expect it to be so easy.
“And?”
“And what?” he says, stepping closer to me. He takes my hands.
“And what else?”
“What do you want, Penny?”
“I want to know why you didn’t tell me. I want to know why you just left me like that.”
His faces creases, and he looks exasperated. “Jesus, Pen—”
“Is it because you didn’t want to tell me? Is it because you didn’t want to admit it?”
“I just admitted it.”
I shake my head. “You don’t want to have feelings for me, do you? What, you thought I’d just be another one of your notches? You thought that we’d just fuck and then I’d follow you around like a puppy afterward? That you wouldn’t have to put in an ounce of effort?”
“No.”
“What, then?”
He sighs, and I see the muscles in his jaw clench. “I’ve just never felt this way about someone before.”
I laugh. “So you are scared.”
“I’m not scared.”
“You don’t know what to do, do you? This is all so foreign to you, isn’t it? Playboy falls, can’t handle it. God, could you be any bigger of a cliché.”
“And what about you?” he barks, and my body jolts at his sudden intensity. “What about you storming out in the morning, acting all confused, refusing to talk to me? There’s a cliché if I ever saw one.”
“Our parents are getting married, Pierce!” I shout, and my fists clench unconsciously. “I care about that.”
“I don’t think so,” he says, eyes wide. He’s calling me out. “You were scared, too.”
“I was not.”
“You didn’t want to face the fact that we fucked, and that you still want to fuck, and that there might be some hurdles in store.”
“You don’t get it, do you, Pierce?” I shake my head at him, disappointed. “I’m not afraid of a challenge. I came all the way out here chasing my dream. I sacrificed my life to start fresh in a new country.”
“Oh, give it a rest, Pen! You love it out here. You’re chasing your dream, yeah, but you’re enjoying it every step of the way.”
“I don’t just want somebody to fuck.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’m not looking for that in life.”
“You’re eighteen. How the fuck do you know what you’re looking for in life?”
“And you’re twenty-one! You think you have a better handle? What, beating people up for a living? Going out, snorting lines of coke, fuck bitches, get high, am I right?”
His mouth doesn’t move. He’s just staring at me out of those light eyes. “Yeah. That was me.”
“That is you.”
“It’s not. Why do you think I’m out here, and not in there collecting my winnings?”
“Because you don’t want to lose, Pierce. You’re too competitive. You don’t want the girl to walk out on you because no girl does that, am I right? No, Pierce never loses a conquest. Pierce always leaves the girl in the dust.”
“I don’t want to leave you. And right now, I don’t want you to leave me.”
The words feel like a punch to my gut. I don’t want to hear them.
“Fuck off, Pierce. I don’t trust you.”
“Why?”
“Because you couldn’t tell me the first time!”
“You’ve already made up your mind not to believe me. And I know why.”
“Oh yeah?” I say, glaring at him. “Tell me then. Tell me what I’m feeling.”
“You started falling for me the first time you saw me. And then we had sex, and trust me, that kind of sex was more than just lust. Then you find out our parents are getting married. It’s not that you don’t trust me. It’s not that you don’t want me. You just don’t want to have it, and then lose it. You’d rather never have it. But who says we gotta lose it?”
“Uh, hello? We’re about to be brother and sister!”
“Stepbrother,” he corrects. “And stepsister.”
“There’s no difference.”
“There is. We’re not blood related, and we have something. You’re going to give that up over a legal technicality?”
“That legal technicality has ramifications, Pierce. What if people found out? What if my boss found out?”
“Tina?” he cries. “You think she gives a shit? You think anybody gives a shit?”
“Not everybody lives in a little bubble like you, Pierce. Not everybody is as protected from judgment as you.”
“I’m not protected.”
“Then you’re just stubborn.”
He stands closer to me. I can smell his sweat. I can even smell his blood.
“Don’t run away. We have something, Pen. Look at us, arguing out here in the middle of the night. This… this means there’s something.”
“No it doesn’t.”
“I don’t just want this,” he says, tracing his thumb over my lips. “I want to be with you.”
He steps closer still, presses his body against mine, wraps me up in his arms. I want to push myself away from him, want to continue fighting him, but I can’t.
“You want this,” he says, pressing his forehead against mine. “You want to be with me.”
I laugh, try to push away a surge of emotion. “I hate that I do.”
“You won’t for lon
g.”
“You and me are not the same, Pierce. You party, I work hard. You’re violent and aggressive, and I’m the total opposite.”
“I drive a Porsche, you take the tram.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about.”
“What I do is not all I am, Pen.”
“But it’s a really big part,” I say.
“Then let me give a part to you.”
“Come on. We both know you won’t change.”
“People change, Penny. I mean, come on, it’s not like we’re old. It’s not like we’re forty!”
I laugh. “Forty is not that old. It’s not even middle-aged.”
“Looks old from where I’m standing. Come on, let me take you home.”
“To my place?”
He cocks his head back. “No, to my place.” When he sees my expression, he puts up his hands. “Just to talk.”
“Fine,” I say. “But we’re just talking.”
*
I wake up, and in an instant regret is at the forefront of my mind. I can barely make out the digital clock on the bedside table, with its blinking red pips, but already I can remember everything we did last night. Every single detail.
Talking was the least of it.
“Oh God,” I murmur. The bed is empty; he’s already woken up. I can hear the clinking of metal coming from his living room, and I know he’s in there working out. He’s pretty much got a full home gym.
“Morning, Pen!” he greets me cheerily as I stumble out, rubbing my eyes. He’s doing weighted punches on a cable machine.
“I gotta go,” I say.
He lets the weights drop, and they bang loudly together. “It’s only six-thirty. You’ve got time to eat.”
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I need to go.”
“Pen—”
I’m still shaking my head, and I go back into the bedroom, and start putting on my clothes. He comes in after me, body glistening with sweat. I can see it beading on his abs, on his chest.
“You can at least you use the spare toothbrush,” he says.
“No,” I say. “I need to go.”
I get dressed as fast as possible, rub the sleep out of my eyes, and pull my water bottle from my bag and take the last sip of it. I’ve still got time to get home, get dressed, and then be at work on time.
There’s no way that I’m going to be late. I can’t be.
“Penny,” he says, but I push past him and go to the front door to his apartment.
“Penny!”
I leave without looking back at him.
As I’m walking down the hallway, I hear him throw something. It breaks.
God, I’m such an idiot!
Why did I let that happen last night?
I flash back in time, feel his hot, sweaty body against mine. Feel him driving himself into me, rocking my body up and down. I can smell him, his musk, feel the heat from his body, hear his groans of pleasure. I can feel his lips on mine, hungry, claiming, his tongue in my mouth, our crushing kisses.
I can feel his hard ass, my hand on it, squeezing, as I climax, as he gives me such unbelievable pleasure. I can feel his shoulder muscle in my mouth as I bite on it, trying not to scream my ecstasy, because it was the middle of the night.
The elevator doors slide open. It’s empty, thankfully, and I lean against the side, trying not to think about the night before.
But I can remember every detail.
Every sexy, pleasurable detail.
This is going too far. Our parents are getting married.
We can’t do this.
*
chapter fourteen
“What the hell was that today?” I ask. I’m fuming. I don’t care that we’re in Albert Park, that there are people walking all around, looking at us as we fight.
But that scene he made at the tattoo shop today, all that Prince Albert crap, was just not acceptable!
“You can’t be coming to my work place and harassing me. You embarrassed me in front of one of Tina’s clients. What if she tells Tina about that? Why are you always acting out like an immature dickhead?”
He stands there, looking way too comfortable and it annoys me.
“Well?” I cry.
“I was just messing around. I wanted to see you.”
“Just messing around? The story of your fucking life, isn’t it, Pierce? You know that girl I was tattooing, Maya, she’s a regular. She’s going to tell Tina about our little exchange, about you just barging in and me letting you interrupt a session! Do you know how unprofessional that all was?”
“You could have stopped me.”
“You didn’t give me much choice!” I scream, pointing a trembling finger at him. “God, you’re so annoying, do you know that? You just piss me off so much. I don’t know why the fuck I even wasted time on you. You’re hopeless!”
“What was that this morning?” he barks back. “You going to make a habit of storming out every time we fuck? I know you’re fighting what you want.”
“We can’t always get what we want, Pierce! Maybe you should learn that.”
“I always get what I want.”
“That’s your problem. You think you can… you think you can force and intimidate and charm and seduce your way to whatever you want. Well, you can’t. Not me. Not when our parents are getting married.”
“Why does that matter?”
“It matters because it’s wrong.”
“Who said it’s wrong? Why is it wrong? Can you give me any reason?”
“Uh, I’m pretty sure it’s illegal.”
“It’s not. I looked it up, Pen. If this is what you want, then you need to take it. We’ll deal with the hurdles later.”
“It’s not what I want.”
“Bullshit,” he says. He walks over to me, three powerful steps, and he takes my face into his hands and he kisses me hard.
I try to push him away, but it’s only token. My heart hammers in my chest. Oh God, I want him. I want him so bad. I’m falling for him and I know it. Why him? Why did it have to be like this?
Our kiss breaks, and I’m panting.
“Tell me you don’t want me,” he says. “Tell me this won’t make you happy.”
“But we can’t.”
“The wedding isn’t for a long time. Anything can happen. Are you really willing to throw away what we’ve got – and you know we’ve got something – for what might happen?”
“I don’t think my father and your mother are going to not get married, Pierce.”
“Pen, in the end, what does it really matter? Why does this bug you so much? The heart wants what it wants, right? Why would you deny yourself that?”
“Because I don’t want…” My voice trails off.
“You don’t want to fall in love, and then have the floor fall out from under your feet. You don’t want to get hurt.”
“I’m not afraid of being hurt.”
“Yes you are.”
“So what?” I say. “So what if I am? But did it ever occur to you that I may not want to hurt my father, either? What if they find out? What if they don’t get married because of us?”
“So what if they don’t?”
“Then they won’t be together!”
“You’re being naïve, Penny. They’re both in their fifties, and nothing is stopping them being together. Marriage… I suspect you’ll find it’s something they’d willingly forego for us.”
“You know, it might actually mean something to them. God forbid you had a thought about someone other than yourself!”
“Yeah? Well, you mean something to me!” he says, his voice rising. “And I’m not going to let the fact that our parents want to get married stop me fighting for you.”
“If I say no,” I tell him, and my voice is shaking. “You can’t force me.”
“But you won’t say no, because you feel it like I do.” He takes my hands and he kisses them. “Give it a shot, Pen. See where the current takes us. You can’t control e
verything in life. Trust me, it will be worth it.”
“You can’t possibly know that!”
“You can’t know that it won’t be. You’ve told me how brave you are, how much drive and dedication it took for you to come out here and chase your dream, in the face of negative stereotypes, in the face of sacrifice. You are brave enough for this.”
“But what if everything goes wrong, Pierce?”
“What if everything goes right, Penelope?”
*
chapter fifteen
“Where are you going?” Rose asks, and she’s eyeing me, grinning. She’s in her pajamas and curled up on the sofa watching television. “It’s pretty late.”
“I’ve got a day off tomorrow,” I say. “So I’m going out.”
“Out?” she asks. “Out with who?”
“Nobody,” I say.
“You’re going out with Pierce again, aren’t you?”
I think about lying, but why bother? “Yeah.”
“So the whole parents getting married thing didn’t stop you two, huh?”
“We’re… seeing where the current takes us.”
“How long?”
“It’s been nearly a month.”
“He good in bed?”
“God, Rose, do you know what personal boundaries are?”
“Yeah, but you’re my friend.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m obligated to share everything with you.”
She grins. “I bet he is. What’s he like? I mean, when he’s not all macho and fighting. In real life.”
“Pretty annoying, actually. Also, kind of normal.”
“Well, that’s disappointing, isn’t it?”
“No,” I say. “No, it’s relieving.”
“So… what are you two love birds going to do tonight?”
I pick up my purse and laugh. “He’s cooking me dinner, actually. Says he makes a mean shepherd’s pie.”
“Bit late for dinner, isn’t it?”
“I got off work late tonight, and I wanted to come home first and get some things.”
“I take it you won’t be coming home tonight?”
“No,” I say. “So lock up tight.”
“Yeah. You going to tell your dad?”
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