The moment the question was out of her mouth, she regretted it as a shadow crossed over Tucker’s expression. “When the right woman finds me, I know I will.” The song ended, but they didn’t move. He continued to imprison her gaze. “What about you?”
She swallowed as her heart twisted uncomfortably with a pang of jealousy. But how could she deny one of the nicest people she knew love. “I thought I did. I’m hoping I find it again.”
Another faster song started, and Lorelei took his hand to lead him off the floor. “Let me say my goodbyes, and then we’ll go home.”
A slow grin pulled at his lips. “Sounds like a plan.”
CHAPTER 6
“So, how long did you date Beth?”
Tucker should have expected the question, but it still caught him off guard. He stared out at the evening traffic. No use lying about it. “I doubt you can call what we had dating.” He spared a quick glance at her. As she looked straight ahead, she took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “We met after one of my rodeos, and we…”
“Had a fling?” she completed his sentence when he let it trail, unsure of what to say.
“Yes.” He never truly regretted his lifestyle as a playboy. It had helped him survive the years of loneliness and pain of a life spent loving a woman who’d never be his. Now, sitting here with her, he hated his endless string of lovers. How could he articulate the reason for his lifestyle? He couldn’t tell her the truth, not yet, but he didn’t want to lie either. “The women I’ve been with mean nothing to me, and I don’t mean anything to them.”
He caught her move and glanced at her. Her glare cut through him. “I don’t think Beth saw it like that. She sounded pretty scorned to me.”
“Beth doesn’t want me, only the thrill of sleeping with someone she shouldn’t. I was a game to her, and she got caught. She’s upset her husband found out about us.”
“She was married at the time?”
At her expression of disbelief, he couldn’t help the bubble of defensiveness. “I didn’t know at the time she was married to one of the other bull riders. Otherwise I never would’ve given her a second glance. I’d never seen her before at any of the rodeos. She came on to me at the bar, and we went back to my room. In the morning, Roy came looking for me and found her in my room. He dumped her, but he and I have remained friends. Apparently, I wasn’t the first guy she cheated with.”
She was silent for a long time. Damn, he’d ruined the moment. Maybe it was for the best. He was becoming too embroiled in the hope she’d love him, not only want to sleep with him.
“I’m sorry.” When she spoke, he glanced at her to find her looking at him. “I have no right to judge you. I know the kind of person Beth is. She’s caused more than one problem at the hospital.”
He didn’t want to say what was is his heart while driving; so, he pulled off the country road onto one of the Kentland access roads.
“Where we going?”
He smiled at her. “You’ll see.”
After bouncing over the rutted trail for about two miles, he stopped by the side of one of the three small lakes spread across the ranch. Unlike the one they’d ridden out to the other day, this one provided irrigation to the crops instead of water to the cattle. He opened his door and got out. Before she had time to exit the truck, he reached her and helped her down. She wore tight jeans tucked into cowboy boots, and a flowy white tank top. Her long blond hair fell around her bare shoulders. She hadn’t worn a hat, but she didn’t need one to look the part of a cowgirl.
A breeze rustled through the tall stalks of corn growing in the field next to the lake. The clouds had moved out, leaving nothing but a star-crowded sky and a nearly full silver moon above.
She gasped when she looked up. “God, it’s beautiful out here.”
“Yeah, it is.” But he wasn’t looking at the sky. The dim light made her look ethereal and more beautiful than ever. She turned to him, a questioning expression puckering her brow. Had she heard the odd note in his voice? Clearing his throat, he reached into the back seat of the Silverado and brought out a blanket. “C’mon, let’s have a seat by the water.”
“Did you plan this sightseeing excursion?” She grinned at him and pointed at the old quilt.
“No. I keep this in the truck for emergencies.”
“Oh, and what kind of emergencies are these?” She’d kept her tone light, but he didn’t miss the tremor at the end.
“For the next time I’m stuck in a snowstorm.”
“Snowstorms? In Central Texas?”
“Well, no, but I slid off an embankment in Evansville, Montana, and nearly froze to death on the side of a mountain road.” He took her hand and led her closer to the edge of the water. “The couple who found me--the town doctor and his wife--took me back to their ranch and thawed me out. She gave me this”--he shook out the quilt and laid it on the ground--“and told me to keep it in my truck for the next time I attempt to drive in the snow. She got a big kick out of this Texas boy sliding off into a ditch.”
Laughing, she sat down on the blanket. “When was this?”
He settled beside her. “Two years ago.”
She leaned back onto her hands and gazed up at the big, open sky. This far away from any cities, the light pollution was minimal and the stars out-did themselves.
“I used to sneak out of the house when I was younger to stare up at the sky.” A sad smile tugged on her lips.
“I know.”
She jerked her head toward him. “How?”
“I saw you a few times. Why did you do it?”
She looked back at the sky. “I believed my parents were up there somewhere among stars. I guess when I was really little I didn’t understand the concept of heaven and thought the stars are where God lives.” She shook her head and let out a sigh. “Even after I knew better, I still found the night sky a comfort.”
He stretched out on his back and stared up. She surprised him when she curled up beside him with her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her.
“Tucker, can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
She shifted to look down at him. “Will you make love to me?”
His breath caught, and he swallowed hard. “I thought we discussed this the other night.”
“You were right, but I’m not exhausted and I know what I want, and it’s you. No strings attached. I just want to experience what it’s like to be with a man who truly wants me.” She rested both hands along his face. “But you also have to promise me something.”
“Anything.” The word escaped him in a breathless whisper.
She leaned down and kissed him gently before whispering, “You have to promise this won’t change our relationship. I can’t lose your friendship, Tucker. You mean too much to me, but I need you. I want you.”
Before he truly thought things through, he twisted until he was over her and kissed her with all the pent up passion boiling in him since the kiss by the other lake. When he lifted his head, he breathed as if he’d run a race and was painfully aware of the layers of clothing between them. He wanted things to change between them, he wanted strings--damn it. He wanted her to love him. But as enough oxygen reached his brain to allow him to think, he also realized he didn’t want to lose what they already had either. “I will never stop being your friend, Lorelei.”
I won’t ever let that happen because it’s all I may ever have.
* * * *
Lorelei ran her hands over his tense shoulders to the snaps of his shirt. As she undid them, he kissed her again. She opened for him, and he thrust his tongue into her mouth. He tasted of beer and the spicy peppers he’d eaten, but nothing drowned out his natural sweetness.
He broke the kiss and pulled away. Even in the dim, silvery light, his eyes burned with a hungry need. “I don’t have a condom with me.”
“I’m on birth control.”
“Are you sure? I won’t be able to stop, Lorelei. God, I want you too much.
”
Words escaped her and all she could do was nod. Her breath left her in a gasp when his mouth sought hers again--hot, hard, and demanding. As he kissed her, he pulled her tank top over her head.
They came apart long enough to shift to a kneeling position on the quilt, facing each other. She grabbed for the buckle of his jeans, opening it and the top button. He shucked off his shirt and tossed it aside, then removed his boots. He held her gaze as he shoved the faded denim of his jeans and his underwear down his legs.
He was more than ready for her, and she swallowed hard as she took in his muscular naked body. She kicked off her own boots and followed with her jeans.
Kneeling before him in only her bra and panties, she shivered in as much anticipation as from the light breeze across the lake. To break the intensity of his stare, and to help her somehow ground herself, she motioned toward the water. “At least the bugs aren’t eating us alive.”
“I’m glad. I can’t imagine anywhere more beautiful to make love to you.” He ran a hand down her cheek to her shoulder, the touch no more substantial than a brush of the wings of a luna month.
She met his gaze again, and he enfolded her in his arms, kissing her as he laid her down onto the quilt. He moved his mouth from hers and brushed his lips along her jawbone, to settle over her pulse. Her heart beat so fast she feared it would explode.
He pulled away to look down at her. “Are you afraid?”
She blinked and bit her bottom lip as she gave a short, sharp nod. “Yeah. A little. It’s been a long time since I’ve done this.” Heat not caused by her desire filled her cheeks, and she glanced away. “Danny never took much time for foreplay.”
He nibbled her ear, then gruffly whispered, “I’ve waited almost twenty years to do this with you, Lorelei. I intend to make it very memorable for both of us.”
She shivered from his words as much from the tickling kisses on her ear and neck. He hadn’t shaved since morning, and the stubble of his beard added to the electrifying sensations. When he moved to her breasts, kissing the tops above her bra, she threaded her fingers into his silky hair. Through the satin, he fingered the tight, greedy buds of her nipples, making any coherent thought almost impossible for her. But one question remained vibrant: what did he mean by saying he’d waited years for this? When he flicked open the front clasp of her bra and rubbed his calloused thumbs over her sensitive nipples, even that question floated away like the fireflies twinkling in the tall grass around them.
She arched her back and moaned as he suckled her, moving from one breast to the other until her nails bit into his back. “Tucker… Please…”
He lifted his head and smiled at her. “Not yet, princess.”
She feathered her fingers over his face, relishing the roughness of the coppery stubble. “You haven’t called me princess since we were kids.”
“I know. Tonight let me be your knight.”
She shook her head. “No, you’re something much better--my cowboy.”
He kissed her as he shifted to the side and pushed down her panties. She lifted her hips while he removed them, then he tossed them to the side. He broke the kiss and pulled away to look at her. For a moment, fear he wouldn’t like what he saw slithered through the euphoria of his kisses.
He caressed up her body; the touch seemed to scorch her skin. “God, you’re so beautiful.”
She traced a scar shone silvery in the light of the moon on the side of his torso. A reminder of a past bull riding accident. The curly hair of his chest appeared black, but she knew it was a deep cinnamon color. “Your beautiful, too, Tucker.”
He moved over her again and kissed her. A dance of tongues meant to mimic what they both wanted. All the while, her other hand slid along his body to find his hard cock. As she stroked the velvety skin, he hissed in her mouth.
Breathing hard, she broke the kiss. Near his ear, she whispered, “Ride me, cowboy. I want you.”
To emphasize her meaning, she wrapped her legs around him and guided him to her. He didn’t need any other encouragement. He thrust into her, causing them both to moan.
As he paused, letting her become accustomed to his size, he stroked her cheek and stared into her gaze. Something soft and tender flickered across his olive eyes, but then, he closed them. With teeth gritted, he began to move. She clung to him as the pleasure built to a tempest until the orgasm broke her apart like an exploding star.
He groaned and stiffened above her, following her to climax.
When he opened his eyes to look into hers, she knew he’d stolen the pieces of her broken heart and somehow managed to not only glue it back together, but to steal it away.
CHAPTER 7
The next eight days were dream-like for Tucker. He and Lorelei spent every waking hour she wasn’t at the hospital together, and slept in the same bed every night. The sex between them was even more astonishing than his wildest dreams, but he treasured the nights they just held each other, talking about everything and nothing at all as much as their lovemaking.
Tonight they’d made love and now he held her. Her head rested on his chest, and he stroked her long golden hair. A bolt of lightning shone through the large double window and cast everything in an eerie silvery glow. Rain beat on the side of the house and thunder crashed in the near-distance. The wind whining around the corners made a hellish noise.
“You’re quiet this evening.” She turned her face up to his.
He swallowed as he considered how to say what was on his mind. “Tomorrow Jenna comes home.”
She smiled and moved so she could look down at him. “Yeah. I’ve missed her.”
Danny had sent pictures of Jenna enjoying her time at Disney and texted Lorelei a few times. He knew she wanted her daughter home, and he did, too. He loved Jenna, but her return also meant things would change between them. “I guess tomorrow night I’ll sleep in my room.”
She wrinkled her brow. “Why?”
He chuckled and glanced away. “Call me old fashioned. But I think it would be for the best. I don’t want her to…be confused by me sharing your bed.”
Now she laughed. “Tucker, my daughter is only four years old. She has no idea what may happen between two adults who share a bed.”
“Maybe not, but I still don’t think it’s appropriate.”
“Why not? Aren’t we together?” The pinch in her brow intensified and something dark passed over her eyes.
“I think we are.” His heart thumped hard at her words. “Do you want that?”
She gave him a soft smile and touched his face. “Yeah, I do. These past three weeks have been amazing, Tucker. And I don’t just mean the sex, though it’s damn good. It’s everything. The way we seem to think the same things. The way you’ve been teaching me how to run my ranch. Even just eating dinner with you and laughing about nothing.” She swallowed and kissed him gently before whispering, “I can’t imagine not having you here with me.”
It wasn’t the declaration of love he wanted; so, he pushed her for a little more. “So, what do you mean?”
With a laugh, she straddled him, her hair cascading around her like a veil. “It means I want to see where we go from here. I want you, Tucker.”
I want you, not I love you. Before he had a chance to let disappointment take root, she kissed him again, but this time the desire in it took his breath away, then she guided his hard cock into her. It was like coming home. She might not love him yet, but she wasn’t ready to let him go, which had to mean something. He had to be patient. As she started to rock her hips with his, he let hope wash away the doubt. He just had to love her enough for both of them for now.
* * * *
Lorelei answered the doorbell, and as soon as she opened the door, Jenna bounded into her.
“Mamma!” She wrapped her small arms around Lorelei’s legs, and she had to grab the doorframe to keep from being toppled over.
She untangled Jenna from her and lifted her into her arms to hug her close. “Hey, sweetheart, I’ve mi
ssed you. I like your dress.”
Jenna kissed her on the cheek. “I missed you, too.” She touched the bodice of the elaborate Snow White dress. “Daddy and Uncle Paul said I was a good girl and got me all the princess dresses. I got to see all of the princesses, too. They were really nice, and they all talked to me. Daddy and Uncle Paul got married by a nice lady who said I was a pretty princess.” She paused long enough to take a breath. “I wore my Cinderella dress, and they let me carry flowers!”
Lorelei laughed, breaking into the Jenna’s non-stop chatter. God, she’d missed her. “You’ll have to tell me all about it. Uncle Tucker would like to hear about it, too. I’m sure.”
Her blue eyes widened. “Uncle Tucker is here?”
“Yep, he’s doing Daddy’s old job and he lives here.” She glanced at Danny who stood on the porch watching them with a wide grin. “He wanted to be here, but he had to take care of something in the pastures.”
Her small face fell. “He’ll be back?”
“Of course, he’ll be back when his job is done.” Lorelei set Jenna on her feet and patted on top of her dark brown head. She’d inherited her eyes, but Danny’s coloring and height. She’d be one beautiful woman someday, and her heart ached with the thought. “Why don’t you go see Miz Frances.” Tucker’s aunt spent all morning baking chocolate chip cookies for Jenna’s return. “She’s missed you, and she just might have something for you.”
“Okay.” The little girl ran down the hallway with the long skirt of her Snow White dress trailing behind her.
“So, what’s Tucker doing in the pastures?” Danny’s voice had her swing her gaze back to him.
“We had a bad storm last night and several trees were blown down taking out the fencing. You know how it goes.” He nodded, and she made a gesture toward the inside. “Would you like to come in?”
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