Grateful for the distraction, she turned and smiled at Connor, who looked dashing and gorgeous in a black tux with a red bow-tie and cummerbund that matched her formal gown. They’d been dance partners most of the night—mainly because of their best man and maid-of-honor roles, but at the moment none of that mattered. The band was playing a slow ballad, a love song to send the bride and groom on their way, and there were other couples on the dance floor enjoying the final song of the night.
Since she wasn’t looking forward to going up to her hotel room by herself, she accepted Connor’s invitation. “Sure, I’d love to dance.”
With a hand pressed lightly to the base of her spine, he led the way to the dance floor. Once they were there, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into his embrace, aligning their bodies intimately from chest to thighs. They swayed in time to the slow tune, and as Connor stroked his thumb along her waist, she let herself relax and unwind. At the moment, she wanted, needed, the closeness he was offering to offset the deep, desolate feeling crowding her chest.
“Are you okay?” he asked, those dark brown eyes of his searching her gaze, as if he was trying to see straight to her soul.
She flashed him a quick smile that felt forced on her lips. “I’m fine.”
“Liar.” Gentle amusement etched his expression. “I saw the way you were watching your sister when she and Greg were saying goodbye to everyone. You’re having a hard time letting her go, aren’t you?”
Her first instinct was to deny his too perceptive claim, to be strong and not show the slightest bit of vulnerability. It had been her M.O. for longer than she cared to remember, but she was tired of keeping her emotions bottled up inside her. Tired of pretending to always be strong when she harbored worries and fears just like everyone else.
“Okay, I’ll admit I’m suffering from a bit of separation anxiety,” she said, and glanced over his shoulder because she couldn’t bear to look him straight in the eyes while she confessed such a pathetic weakness. “She’s been such a huge part of my life for so long, and it’s hard to imagine what it’s going to be like not seeing and talking to her on a daily basis.”
“It’s not as though she’s stepped completely out of your life,” he said gently.
“No, but she has another family now, and she’s like a daughter to Greg’s mother and father.” Considering that Celeste had spent more than half her life without one parent or the other, Rebecca was certain her sister would readily embrace the normalcy of a real family.
Connor swept the back of his fingers along her cheek as they continued to dance to the slow music. “Rebecca, you’ll always be her family.”
She bit her lower lip, feeling another swell of emotion come over her. “It’s just…hard,” she said, unable to explain.
“I don’t doubt that it is.” His voice was infused with more understanding and patience than she knew she deserved. “But you’re Celeste’s sister by blood, and that’s a bond that will never break or falter.”
God, I hope so, she thought as the band finished playing. She waited for Connor to loosen his hold on her, but instead he put his mouth near her ear and spoke so only she could hear him. “Will you stay with me tonight?”
Funny, but she could have sworn she heard the slightest bit of uncertainty in his voice, and realized that Connor wasn’t taking anything for granted. He was openly stating his desire for her, as well as issuing an invitation to share his bed, and other pleasures, with him tonight, without knowing if she wanted the same.
Her answer came much too easily. Connor was quickly becoming another weakness, like the Sinfully Sweet chocolate they’d indulged in the past two nights. But there was no chocolate clouding her judgment or thoughts now.
She didn’t want to be alone tonight. Didn’t want to think about the empty, unexciting life waiting for her back at home. What she wanted more than anything was to feel, and Connor did that for her in a way no man ever had before.
She met his gaze and smiled. “Yes, I’ll stay with you tonight.”
5
EVEN THOUGH SHE was completely and utterly sated, Rebecca couldn’t sleep. Why was it that tonight Connor didn’t seem to have any problem drifting off after the second time they’d made love, yet here she was, wide-eyed and awake?
Closing her eyes, she released a soft sigh, enjoying the way Connor had cuddled up behind her, wrapped a strong arm around her waist, and pulled her close to the heat and strength of his body. His hold on her was possessive yet caring, secure yet loose enough for her to move away if she wanted.
At the moment, she was perfectly content.
She immediately blinked her eyes back open, startled by her thoughts—as well as the frightening realization that she’d fallen hard and fast for Connor Bassett in such a short amount of time. Suddenly, she felt caged in and restless. She needed space, along with air to breathe that didn’t include his scent.
Gingerly, she eased away from him and off the bed. Finding one of his T-shirts on the floor, she slipped it over her head and quietly made her way into the living room. Leaving the lights off, she stood by the large plate-glass window that gave her a beautiful view of Crystal Lake. She watched the way the moonlight dappled the rippling water with an ethereal glow, which reminded her of last night when Connor had taken her for a ride on his motorcycle and they’d ended up at the secluded spot by the lake.
A smile curved the corner of her mouth as she remembered just how exhilarating it had been to ride on his bike, and the way he’d listened so intently when she’d talked about her past. While the sensible, practical side to her personality told her that their time together was nothing more than a brief affair to slake their attraction to one another, a newer, whimsical part of her wondered about the possibility of more.
Shaking her head at that foolish thought, she headed across the room to the small refrigerator to get herself a drink of water. Except when she opened the door and peered inside, it wasn’t the chilled bottles of Evian that caught her attention, but a blue-foil wrapped half-heart she recognized from Sinfully Sweet.
It was obvious by the crinkled foil that Connor had unwrapped the candy to read his secret message inside, then covered it back again without eating the chocolate. More than a little curious to see what his note had said, she picked up the piece of candy, retrieved the small strip of paper tucked inside, and read the typed message.
Opposites do attract.
Be bold. Be spontaneous.
Go for it!
Her stomach twisted and turned as she read, then re-read, the familiar words that had given her the courage to jump into an affair with Connor, unable to believe that he’d received the same message that she had. Out of all the hundreds of chocolate hearts Sinfully Sweet had been giving away, what were the chances that she and Connor would end up with identical messages and matching hearts?
Very slim, her mind whispered, quickly dousing her flare of excitement with doubts and suspicions.
She thought back to all the times Connor had subtly used those same words with her. Like when he’d coaxed her to be a little spontaneous and try something new so she’d take a ride with him on his motorcycle. Or how he’d told her that maybe it was time for her to think about what she wanted for a change and go for it.
It could have all been coincidence, but every feminine instinct within her told her that there was more at work than just fate. No, she was beginning to suspect that Connor had taken advantage of an opportunity that had presented itself to him. Not that she could blame him for what had happened between them, considering how quick she’d been to jump into an affair with him.
But discovering the truth of how he’d manipulated her certainly put everything back into its proper perspective. Like the fact that their fling was a temporary thing, that every one of his other relationships had been short lived, and that he’d made her no promises of anything more. He was still six years younger than she was, he still played computer games for a living and he was far too frivolous with how he spe
nt his money.
So, in essence, not much had changed in the past three days, not unless she wanted to count her too involved heart and emotions—which she did not.
“Hey, are you okay?”
The sound of Connor’s sleep-husky voice startled Rebecca out of her stupor. She turned around to face him, with the chocolate heart half in one hand and the thin strip of paper with the message on it in the other hand. Her traitorous heart picked up its beat as she took in his half-naked appearance. All he was wearing was a pair of cotton shorts, and that gorgeous body of his threatened her good sense and determination to handle this situation with as much poise as possible.
“I came out here to get a bottle of water, but found this instead,” she said, and calmly held up the evidence she’d discovered. “You have the matching message to my chocolate heart half. But you already knew that, didn’t you?”
He glanced from her hands, then back to her face, resignation passing across his features. “I suspected it, yes.”
While most men would have scrambled for some kind of excuse, Connor was honest and straight with her. And she respected him for that, even if her heart hurt more than she could ever remember.
She put on a brave face and attempted to treat the situation with a kind of casual sophistication that was completely foreign to her. “Well, our weekend affair was fun while it lasted, wasn’t it?”
Connor placed his hands on his hips, clearly aware of the fact that Rebecca was withdrawing from him and putting up those walls of hers. And he did whatever he could to keep her from shutting him out completely. “Rebecca…it doesn’t have to end.”
“Of course it does,” she said with a little laugh that sounded way too brittle to his ears. “We’re two different people who live two vastly different lives. Sex is one thing, but a real relationship takes time and work with two people who have the same goals.”
Ahhh, now he knew where this conversation was headed. Her insecurities were clawing their way to the surface and her self-protective instincts were kicking in. “Our goals are very similar, Rebecca, if you’d just let yourself get past what your father put you through.”
She visibly stiffened, but surprisingly she didn’t issue any kind of defense, proving she was well aware that her past had scarred her when it came to her own personal relationships. Trusting in a man to take care of her, to provide the kind of security and stability she needed in her life, wasn’t easy for her to do.
He sighed, knowing he was up against tremendous odds, but willing to fight them to be with her. “Look, I know this all happened so fast, but I’ve wanted you for a very long time, Rebecca. For me, this weekend was real, and I want it to last. And there’s no reason why it can’t. Your sister is grown and married and has a life of her own,” he said, deliberately touching on one of her most vulnerable spots, because she needed to face what was in store for her in the future. “You’ve done a great job with Celeste, but it’s time to let her go and have a life of your own. Let someone take care of you for a change.”
Let me be that person for you, he transmitted with his gaze.
Her chin lifted, and her fingers curled around the strip of paper in her hand. The note that had brought them together…and was now about to tear them apart. “I can manage on my own just fine,” she said defensively.
He had no doubt that she could. “But being on your own doesn’t keep you warm at night, does it?”
She didn’t respond, and he guessed that was because the answer was obvious and because it was something she wasn’t ready to come to terms with yet.
God, what had happened to the vibrant woman he’d been with for the past three days? The woman who’d been bold and had taken risks and enjoyed herself? She was gone, having reverted back to someone who believed she had to be in control of her emotions and actions.
Keeping his frustration tamped was incredibly difficult at the moment, but somehow he managed to remain calm. “We’ll leave here as friends, just as you requested, but there’s something I want you to know.” Figuring he had nothing left to lose, he put everything out in the open. “I’m falling in love with you, Rebecca. And it has nothing to do with sex and lust, and everything to do with who you are. You’re genuine and loyal and caring, and those are the qualities that make me want you as much as I do. But none of that matters if you aren’t willing to meet me halfway.”
She was staring at him in shock, and since she didn’t seem inclined to reply to anything he’d just said, he knew this was the end. To them and what could have been.
With a heavy heart, he turned and walked back into the bedroom, leaving her in the living room, alone. Just as she preferred.
AS THE BEDROOM door closed behind Connor, Rebecca drew in a deep shuddering breath, reeling over his admission. When her mind finally cleared, her first instinct was to deny what he’d said and the way he felt about her. But she couldn’t bring herself to do it—because if she’d learned anything these past three days, it was that Connor was a man of his word. Most importantly, he had more integrity than her own father had ever possessed.
In that distinctive moment, she realized she had two choices. One, was to walk out of his hotel room with her dignity, heart and emotions intact, or two, finally confront the fears that had ruled so many years of her life.
She uncurled her fist and glanced down at the crumpled piece of paper in her hand. The words bold, spontaneous and go for it stared up at her, making her realize that maybe, possibly, she’d been given the pink heart with the same message for a reason. Not so much because of fate, but because her life, and her courage, needed that boost. That push. That shove.
Bold and spontaneous felt so good with Connor. And she knew that if she took the coward’s way out and left now, that she risked the possibility of losing Connor forever.
Was she willing to take that chance?
Surprisingly, the answer was crystal clear, and it reverberated inside her with a firm and resounding no.
Squaring her shoulders, and preparing herself to be bolder and more spontaneous than she’d ever been before, she headed toward Connor’s bedroom, opened the door, and stepped inside. To her surprise, she found him packing his belongings into his duffel bag.
While there was no reason for him to stay since their wedding duties were done, it was nearly four o’clock in the morning, way too early for him to be on the road.
“You’re leaving?” she asked, and heard the panic in her own voice.
He spared her a brief glance before shoving a small stack of T-shirts into his bag. “There’s nothing left for me to stay here for.”
She winced, stung by his words, because she knew exactly what he was referring to. Her. Them.
She swallowed hard, trying to gulp down her fears at the same time. “What if I told you that you should stay? For us?”
He walked into the bathroom and returned seconds later with his toiletry bag. “I got the impression out there that there is no us.”
He was moving so fast that he was making her dizzy. “Stop, Connor. Please.”
There must have been something in her voice that reached him, because he finally halted by the bed. His gaze was direct, and his body language all but screamed stay back. Which she did. For now.
“When I agreed to our affair this weekend, I never thought that it would be anything more than a physical thing.” When he continued to stare at her, she shifted anxiously on her bare feet and pushed herself to go on. “But instead, I came to realize what was missing from my life.”
He crossed his arms over his broad chest and lifted a brow. “And what’s that?”
“Fun. Laughter. Spontaneity.” A smile wavered on her lips. “All because of you.”
He shrugged. “Hey, that’s what friends are for.” His tone was laced with sarcasm.
He had every right to be frustrated with her, and she struggled to continue in the face of such opposition. “What I’m about to say isn’t easy for me, but I hope you’ll hear me out.”
He remained quiet, but didn’t move from where he was standing, and she took that as a positive sign.
“You already know what my childhood was like, and some fears die a lot harder than others. It’s like I’ve been programmed to be responsible and practical, because my father was never those things. And once he was gone, I had to be even more sensible and dependable to give Celeste the stability and security that he left us without.”
“That’s understandable,” he said, softening a bit.
She dampened her bottom lip with her tongue. “And then there’s the fact that you’re six years younger than I am.”
He uncrossed the arms he’d folded over his chest, and let his arms hang loosely at his sides. “It’s just a number, Rebecca.”
“You’re right,” she said, nodding. Never once had she thought of him as immature. If anything, he was much wiser than his years because of what he’d faced as a child. “Then there’s the issue of you spending money in ways that I can’t understand because of who I am and how I grew up.”
“I’m not like your father, Rebecca,” he replied adamantly. “I invest my money and have plenty of it. I want more than I have in life, but by that I don’t mean material goods. Those tangible things aren’t important to me.” He walked over to her and rubbed his hands up and down her arms, warming her from the outside in. “I want a relationship, one that isn’t based on a woman wanting me for my money or what I can give her. I want you, because you’re everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman, and more.”
Could she truly be that lucky? It appeared that she was, and she would no longer question Fate, or even Cupid. “Okay,” she whispered.
He frowned, looking uncertain. “Okay?”
“You can have me, any way you want me.” She liked the sound of that. “But be patient with me, because I’ve got a lot of hangups and insecurities to deal with.”
“I know.” He grinned, showing off his boyish dimple. “But it’s okay because I love you, Rebecca Moore. Just as you are.”
Sinfully Sweet: Wickedly DeliciousConstant CravingSimply Scrumptious Page 7
