by Ellie Danes
Maggie glanced at the door as Nathan paced by. “I know. He wants to help me.”
I wondered how sharp Maggie’s instincts had gotten since being kidnapped. Kids had a way of seeing through adult pretenses, but she was probably even more attuned now. Maggie could probably sense the intentions of adults from across the room. I was glad that she had realized quickly that she could trust Nathan and me.
“Let’s brush your teeth,” I told Maggie.
We used the cheap motel offerings and while she scrubbed, I wondered what to give her to sleep in. Her clothes were filthy. Having nothing myself, I finally peeled off my t-shirt and slipped my sweatshirt back on, one layer short.
“Here. You can wear this to sleep in. I’ll wash your clothes in the bathtub, and they’ll dry overnight,” I said.
Maggie nodded and slipped my shirt on. She was asleep seconds after I tucked her into the big motel bed.
Nathan must have noticed me turning off all the lights but one. He paced a few more minutes up and down, his tread softer now, then he opened the door soundlessly.
“Looks like we’re sleeping on the floor,” I whispered.
Nathan smiled and slipped into the room, bolting the door behind him. “I’m glad you got her settled down.”
We stood with too many unsaid things between us. “Ah, I think I’ll get ready for bed too,” I said.
I retreated to the bathroom and faced myself in the mirror. It had been a long and head-spinning evening, and I needed a second to get my feet back on the ground. My face was smudged with dust and dirt from chasing Maggie across the border field. It was crazy to think about how I left Nathan just a few hours ago.
Not that I was sad to be back. Having Nathan a few feet away made the tight knot in my chest go away. I wasn’t alone in the world anymore and neither was Maggie.
In fact, so much had happened in the span of one evening, that I couldn’t even remember why I had left.
I scrubbed my face and stretched my mind back. I had been upset with Nathan for dragging us across the border ‘by accident.’ Yes, we’d been evading the gunmen, but I still thought it was possible that Nathan had made the decision without telling me.
Now it didn’t matter. We had Maggie, Nathan’s whole reason for recklessly charging into Mexico.
My heart fluttered. Was it really almost over?
I got ready for bed, glad that I had been wearing multiple layers when we abandoned our car. I still had a thin tank-top to wear when I slipped into our makeshift bed on the floor.
When I opened the bathroom door, I saw that Nathan had quietly done all he could to create a soft, comfortable spot for us on the motel floor. We looked at each other over the makeshift bed and both realized we were nowhere near able to sleep.
Nathan nodded toward the small table, and we both slipped into the chairs. He started to outline his plan in a hushed voice but I held up my hand.
“No. No more decisions without me, remember?” I asked.
Nathan glowered but nodded. “What do you think we should do?”
“First things first, we have to get Maggie home safe.” I held up my hand again when Nathan tried to protest. “I don’t care how badly you want to charge into the cartel with your one gun blazing. You’re not going to try to take them down when Maggie is still in danger.”
“But what about the other kids?” Nathan asked. “We can’t just leave knowing there are other children like Maggie who need help.”
“What can we do, Nathan? You’re just one man, not a whole army. Maggie made it sound like it’s a huge operation. You’re not going to be able to stop the cartel on your own,” I said. “We have to take Maggie’s story straight to the police.”
Nathan scowled. “The authorities didn’t do much for her or her mother when she went missing. What if they’re in the pocket of the cartel?”
Icy fear slipped through my veins. Who could we trust? The answer was obvious. We could only trust each other. Still, I wasn’t ready to let Nathan keep on making decisions while holding onto his secrets. Trust was a two-way street.
I crossed my arms over my chest. “Are you saying I can’t call the police for help?”
“I know it sounds insane, Bree, but think about it. How are these kids getting back and forth alone with no one saying anything? The police have to hear reports of children running around after curfew, and instead of investigating, they are just letting it happen,” Nathan said.
“Maybe the cops around here, but there are other people we can call,” I said.
Nathan shook his head. “We can’t call anyone, remember? Nathan and Bree don’t exist anymore. We’d get too tangled up explaining all of that and months would go by before they finally got around to asking about the other children.”
I pressed both hands to my forehead. I knew Nathan was right but it was terrifying. We couldn’t really trust the authorities to do the right thing. They’d be too caught up trying to bring us to justice while the real bad guys kept up their operations. And those kids, the ones just like Maggie, would keep having to cross the border in the dark with backpacks full of drugs.
“So, what are we going to do?” I asked.
Nathan leaned forward and pulled my hands down from my face. He held them lightly as he looked into my eyes. “We’ll work together. You and me. And Maggie. She’s one brave kid.”
I glanced over at the sleeping child, and my heart skipped a beat. It was hard to tell if Maggie sleeping peacefully or Nathan’s light touch was causing my heart to stumble with happiness.
I pulled my hands away. It was ridiculous that in the middle of all of this, I could be so happily in love. Had I forgotten all the times that Nathan had withheld information and led me along blindly?
“Together as in you’re going to cross the border with us?” I asked, knowing the answer.
Nathan sat back in his chair and flexed his jaw, struggling for the right thing to say. “You have a much better chance of getting Maggie over the border, just the two of you.”
“And I’m supposed to leave you alone in a Mexican motel room with a gun and a backpack full of cocaine?” I asked.
“Maggie knows where they are keeping the other kids. She can at least point me in the right direction. I’ll go there and face Adrian Juarez. Remember? I have some sort of deal I am supposed to be upholding,” Nathan said.
“So, they’ll remind you of what it is before they blow your head off. How does this sound like a good plan?” I asked.
“I didn’t say it was a good plan. It’s the only one we’ve got,” Nathan said.
“We can think of something better,” I said.
It was well past two in the morning when we came full circle, and I had to admit defeat. Any plan I suggested ended with Nathan and I facing endless questions from the authorities while the children were still caught in the cartel’s control.
We’d talked about contacting Nathan’s Navy Seal team, but he refused to endanger their careers. We’d even talked about me calling Janice and getting her to bring me my social security card, but the shock would have been too great. Everyone still believed Nathan and I were dead.
“Fine,” I said finally. “Tell me your plan.”
“You and Maggie will cross the border the way we came, except you’ll go in broad daylight,” Nathan said.
“What? No.” I shook my head.
“It’s safer than going at night when Maggie’s contact will be looking for her. In the daylight, you stand a better chance of blending in on the US side,” Nathan said. “It’s a risk but it’s the best chance we’ve got.”
“And then what are Maggie and I supposed to do?” I asked.
“There’s a bus station not far from where we crossed. You’ll pretend you’re mother and daughter and buy two tickets. No one will ask for ID because you’ll pay with cash,” Nathan said.
It sounded possible and the way Nathan said it gave it a sense of finality. It would all be over soon.
“But what about yo
u?” I asked again.
“I’ll ditch the backpack full of drugs,” Nathan said. “A few hours after you and Maggie cross, I’ll leave the backpack on the road near the first warehouse. Whoever’s looking for her will probably find it before nightfall. They’ll think that Maggie ran in Mexico, and they’ll head straight for the border station.”
“Then what?” I asked.
Nathan scrubbed the stubble on his chin and stalled. “I’ll ask around about a little girl fitting Maggie’s description, tell a few of the local shop owners that I saw her running around here alone.”
“Nathan. Tell me what you’re going to do when you find the cartel, or worse, when they find you.”
He scrubbed his chin again and then gave in. “I’ll demand to meet with Adrian Juarez. Maybe the deal is something I can still deliver. Maybe I can earn his goodwill back. Long enough to find out where they are keeping the kids.”
I shook my head, and my eyes filled with tears. “It’s too much. Too much could go wrong.”
Nathan leaned forward and wiped tears off my cheek. “Let’s sleep on it. Everything will seem more hopeful in the morning. The important thing is Maggie is with us. She’s safe.”
I nodded and crawled into our makeshift bed on the floor. Above me, the little girl let out a soft sigh that eased my tension. Nathan was right, the important thing was Maggie was with us and we were all in this together.
Nathan laid down next to me. He hesitated, shifting on his portion of the thin blanket, and then he wrapped his arm around me. I turned over and buried myself in his comforting arms.
“Thank god you’re back,” Nathan whispered into my hair. “I know I couldn’t do this without you.”
I wriggled closer into Nathan’s strong arms and felt myself falling deeper in love. It didn’t matter what my head told me, my heart had already decided. I was with Nathan until the end.
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Nathan
Bree returned from the store to find me pacing the room with my arms crossed.
She dropped both bags on the motel room floor. “Is Maggie gone? Did she run?”
I swallowed the urge to tell Bree that would have been easier. “No. She’s freaking out and won’t come out of the bathroom,” I said.
Bree rushed over to the bathroom door and pressed her ear to it. “About what? Maggie, honey? Are you okay?”
“She’s fine,” I said. “But I’ve had to go to the bathroom for almost an hour.”
Bree turned on me with an impatient frown. “Her clothes are probably still wet, which is why I went to the store in the first place. She doesn’t have anything else to wear.”
“She was fine, all wrapped up in two blankets,” I muttered. My first impasse with a pre-teen girl had convinced me never to willingly get into a confrontation with a woman.
Thankfully, Bree ignored me and continued to talk through the bathroom door with honeyed words. “I got a few new outfits for you. Nothing special but they’ll work long enough to get you home. Remember? You’re going home this morning.”
Something about the way Bree said that at the same time as her eyes flickered in my direction made me uneasy. “You’re both heading home this morning,” I reminded her.
So much for never provoking a female.
Bree rounded on me. “You’re not the only one who gets to make decisions around here,” she snapped.
I held up both hands. “As long as she decides to come out of the bathroom before my bladder bursts.”
“I got snacks, too,” Bree told Maggie through the door. “As soon as you get dressed, we’ll pack up a new bag for you.”
“Not some dumb kid’s backpack?” Maggie asked.
Bree grinned at the closed door. “No. I got you a purse. You’re too old for princess backpacks.”
The door eased open, and Maggie’s suspicious face peeked through. “What kind of clothes?”
Bree held up a bright tank top and a pair of floral shorts. “I also grabbed a plain pair of shorts and a hooded sweatshirt. All the other shirts were for tourists.”
Maggie nodded and snatched the plastic bags from Bree’s hands. She emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later in the plain shorts and tank top with the hooded sweatshirt zipped all the way to the top.
“And a purse?” she asked.
Bree handed her a woven backpack purse, and Maggie happily began stuffing snacks inside.
In the meantime, I squeezed into the bathroom and contemplated myself in the mirror. I had to change my identity again but it had to be subtle. If I was going to evade border security as well as Adrian Juarez and the cartel men who recognized me, I had to go undercover.
Bree had argued that I had no idea how many of the New Mexico City Cartel might recognize me. She had a point but I insisted on taking a chance.
Maggie had squeezed her eyes shut and tried to count how many children she remembered were kept with her. Her memory put my estimate at somewhere between eight and twelve children. All those mourning families, all those scared kids just hoping to get home.
I had to make that happen.
“Wearing a wig will only make it worse,” Bree said through the open bathroom door. “It has to be simple. Otherwise, you’ll end up sticking out instead of blending in.”
“What about a pillow in my shirt to make me look fat?” I asked.
Bree shook her head. “Your face doesn’t look fat; it won’t match up. Besides, what would you say when someone punches you in the stomach?”
I laughed. “Why do you sound so sure that’s going to happen?”
“Wishful thinking?” Bree couldn’t keep a straight face.
She went to help Maggie with her long hair that had somehow become a rat’s nest again overnight. I thanked my lucky stars that I hadn’t been expected to take a brush to that snarled mess. Maggie would have been bald, and we both would have been in tears by the time I got us untangled.
I shook my head and turned back to the mirror. There wasn’t much I could do with my own hair either. The best choice was to leave the shaggy length and just dye it another color.
“Did you pick up hair dye?” I asked Bree.
She tossed a box into the bathroom with a stern look. “Are you sure red is the right color?”
I figured red would be blend in with my already dark hair, but give it enough of a change. “I’m just not a good blond,” I told her.
She returned to Maggie and they turned on a loud gameshow while I contemplated a longer mustache. I hooked my thumbs in my belt loop and started practicing a Southern drawl.
“Please tell me you’re not going to do an accent.” Bree appeared in the doorway again, shaking her head.
“I served with a man from Georgia. He talked enough that I’m sure I can still hear his voice in my head,” I told her.
“Georgia? You really think people are going to buy that you are a Southern gentleman?” Bree asked.
I hooked her around the waist and dragged her into the bathroom. “Well, ma’am, I believe they just might.”
“Nice try but I’m not quite a ‘ma’am’ yet,” Bree said.
She tried to pull away but I couldn’t let go. Her lips were strawberry red and still curved in a smile at me. I had to taste them.
I leaned forward and brushed my mouth over her slight smile. Bree didn’t give into my pull but she leaned forward just enough to prolong the kiss. I rewarded her with a deeper, more insistent return.
Bree put one hand on my chest to push me away while another fluttered around my waist and seemed to want to keep me close.
“No, I can’t. We can’t.” Bree gestured out into the motel room where Maggie was watching the loud game show.
I let Bree go. Every muscle in my body hummed with the desire to catch her close again, feel her body pressed against mine, but I crossed my arms and held firm. Bree was leaving; someone had to take Maggie home.
It was for the best. Bree had come to her senses a few times now but never managed to get
away from me. Now she had Maggie to care for. The girl was proving she’d adjusted to her dangerous independence but Bree was already acting the protective mother.
I didn’t want her to go. I could admit that much, to myself at least. It was just that Bree deserved more. And I needed to know that she was safe before I put my hare-brained scheme into action.
There was no safe way to find an in with the cartel and what I had to do was too dangerous for Bree. I needed to be on my own; it would be better that way.
Bree gave me a sad look and disappeared into the other room. I couldn’t bear to lose sight of her yet, so I abandoned my undercover planning and followed her out of the bathroom. It was all I could do not to take her hand and hold it tight.
Luckily, Maggie was the perfect distraction.
“Wow, you clean up good,” I said.
Maggie looked up at me shyly but smiled. “Thanks. Bree did the braid.”
The intricate weave of the braid had completely transformed Maggie’s wild unkempt look. She was now a prim young girl. The clean clothes and tidy hair made her look like someone who had never seen a minute of trouble. It was almost enough to make me forget Maggie had been in the cartel’s control for almost a month.
“You look wonderful,” I said. “I might have done everything else wrong, but at least I was lucky enough to see you heading home.”
“We never would have found her if you hadn’t insisted on coming here,” Bree said. “I think it was more than luck.”
I blinked, surprised that Bree had forgiven me for the border crossing so soon. Then I remembered we would probably never see each other again.
“I’m glad it all worked out in the end,” I said.
Bree’s forehead knit. “But it’s not the end yet, Nathan. This doesn’t feel right. I mean, it’s great that Maggie is heading home, but what about you? You shouldn’t be staying here alone.”
Maggie nodded. “The bad men are really bad. Everyone should stay away from them.”
“I know, but someone has to help all those other kids,” I told Maggie. “Besides, I made a mistake a while back and I need to fix it. No one else can do it for me.”
