Despite everything I feel excited. I can’t wait to see the band perform again. This time there will be no reservations. I know Jax loves me and I fully intend on worshipping before the altar of this Rock God who commands the masses who pour in to adore him.
I’m going to watch the show with Logan and Sammie. Carter will be by my side and I very much doubt that anyone would get near me with him standing there. Tonight, I will just relax and watch my man at work.
The stadium is full and there is the general buzz of excitement and anticipation that goes with staging a large show. The fans are impatient and even the loud background music doesn’t drown out their shouts for their idols.
Carter has decided to stick to me like glue and I am grateful for it. I’m trying not to think about what happened today. The only thing I have let it control is my appearance. The pink wig is back as are the glasses. I am taking no chances at being recognized.
Sammie and Logan are watching from the VIP area. There are many local celebrities and media types there. The usual crowd at these events who score a free ticket in return for a good write up. Carter thought it best that we watch from the control booth. No awkward questions to answer and no prying eyes. It suits me as the last thing I want is a conversation with anyone.
The lights suddenly dim and the background music changes. I feel the excitement all around me as the lights change and the stadium plunges into darkness. The music gains in volume and we hear the opening bars of one of the band’s hits. Then the lighting kicks in revealing the four—almost superhuman, rock idols on stage. The noise is deafening as the crowd reacts. I grip Carter’s arm and look at him with excitement. He just laughs as I turn back to the only man I have eyes for.
Jax stands before us and the screen beside him zooms in on him. My heart tightens as I see him as he joins the guys in playing the loud, rock music that stands heavily in the air. They build anticipation and the noise is off the scale. Then he sings, and the crowd goes wild. I am mesmerized. He is in total command and I watch him come alive before my eyes. He is where he feels most at home, doing what he was born to do. The tears build behind my eyes as my heart bursts with pride. He is magnificent.
Time has no meaning here. Nothing else matters but this moment. If there is a world outside this room, it ceases to matter. I think of nothing but the present. Any problems I may have do not exist here. This is a bubble that I am happy to inhabit. For two hours, I forget. I forget how fragile my happiness is and I forget how quickly that happiness may shatter. In here my heart is free and my mind filled with nothing but admiration for the four guys on that stage.
Then it is over. With the last flash of fire and the last chord of the guitar. The only sound left is that of the fans chanting for their return. The lights brighten and the show is over.
As the stadium begins to empty my fear returns.
Carter looks at me with amusement. “You enjoy that, Emily?”
I laugh, nodding frantically. “Didn’t you? It was amazing.”
He grins and nods towards the exit. “Come on, we’d better go and find your guy. He will be waiting for you.”
We head backstage and my heart thumps in my chest as I approach the room allocated to the after party. The VIPs are invited to stay behind for drinks and to meet the band. I feel a little nervous and pull Carter back.
“Listen, is this such a good idea? I mean, my picture is all over the news and these people are the ones responsible for reporting it. I think I should keep away.”
Carter nods in agreement.
“You’re right. It’s probably best if you wait in the dressing room. I’ll tell Jax and I’m sure he will make his excuses.”
I watch as he heads off and I walk towards the dressing room. This all sucks. Even now I can’t be with the man I love in public. Am I always destined to remain a secret?
I laugh when I enter the dressing room. Empty bottles litter the floor and junk food packaging is discarded all around the room. Rolling my eyes, I start to tidy.
It must only be five minutes later that the door opens and I look up in surprise.
A woman stands there, wearing the most revealing dress, almost indecent really. She has long dark hair and a full figure which is very much on display. She looks disappointed.
“Oh, I thought this was where the band were.”
Shaking my head, I smile politely.
“If you’re looking for the after party, it’s down the hall, three doors to the left.”
She nods and then steps inside looking at me with curiosity.
“Do I know you?”
I try to shake off a very uncomfortable feeling.
“No, I don’t think so.”
Her eyes narrow and I can tell she is trying to place me. She looks around at the mess and smiles.
“You got the rough job then. Clearing up after those guys is no easy task.”
I just nod and look down. She is staring at me and I feel extremely uncomfortable.
I wish she would just leave but she leans against the door and smiles. It’s not a smile that makes me warm to her, in fact, totally the opposite.
She laughs softly.
“So, tell me…?”
I blush. “Emily.”
She nods. “So tell me, Emily. I’ll level with you. Jax and I have a certain arrangement and he expects me to be waiting for him. This seems as good a place as any, would you be so kind to go and fetch him for me? I would really appreciate it and then it may be best if you leave us to it. By the time we’ve finished, the room will be a whole lot messier.”
I think I freeze all over. This woman is something else. I don’t know what to say and she looks at me with a hard glint in her eye.
“Well, go on then. The sooner that man is inside me, the better I’ll feel.”
Now I want to slap that red lipstick right off her face. Ugh how dare she.
She moves over to the couch and flicks the items of clothing off the cushions. “Hm, this will do just nicely. It’s been a long time coming, but he is about to learn what a real woman tastes like.”
I wonder what the sentence is for murder these days because I am now totally in the mind of one. What do they call it? Oh yes, a crime of passion. I am sorely tempted to try out one of Carter’s pressure point moves on this vile woman planning to get down and dirty with the man I love.
Instead, I play at being the subservient little assistant that she thinks I am. I just smile respectfully.
“I’ll leave you to- um- prepare yourself then. I’ll go and get him.”
She smiles triumphantly and even before I am out of the door she is shrugging off her dress. As Jax would say, “Fuck me!”
Now I’m stuck. I can’t go in there and I can’t go in the party room. I can hear laughter from down the hall and feel miserable inside. This sucks.
So, I sink down on the floor with my back against the wall and wait.
It must only be five minutes later that the door opens down the hall and Jax rushes out. My heart leaps as I see the anxiety in his eyes as he sees me sitting there. Before he can speak I put my finger to my lips and gesture to the dressing room. With the questions burning in his eyes he moves quietly towards me. I stifle a giggle and as he reaches me stand on tip toe and whisper in his ear.
“Right now, there is a woman- probably naked, waiting for you in there. She told me to come and get you—apparently you have an arrangement.”
The look on his face makes me giggle again, and he shakes his head.
“I think I know who you’re talking about. Victoria bloody Montgomery. I told security to keep her away from me. I never thought she’d be so brazen though.”
He grins and pulls me beside him. “Come on, let’s go. I’m done with this scene and the only woman I want to be inside is you.”
He grins wickedly and takes out his phone. I watch him text someone and he laughs softly.
“There, that should keep the guys amused for a while.”
He drags me o
ff after him and we head to the rear of the building. He nods to security and we get into the usual black car that waits for us.
We sink back into the black leather upholstery and he pulls me beside him. The look in his eyes is one of complete and utter lust.
“Come here, baby. I’ve missed you and all I want is to fuck you on every surface in our hotel room in every way possible. I want to pass out with ecstasy whilst still inside you and wake up and do it all again.
I smile sexily. “I couldn’t have put it better myself.”
***
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Jax
The guys are in high spirits as we leave Lansing, bound for Illinois. Emily is sleeping after I wore her out last night. I fully intend on joining her but thought she needed a little sleep before I rudely awaken her.
Cody laughs and takes out his phone.
“You should have been there, Jax. Victoria’s face was a picture.”
He shows us the photograph of a naked Victoria trying desperately to cover up in front of a room full of VIPs. I had texted Cody who wasted no time. He told everyone that the party was moving to the dressing room and proceeded to burst into it with the press and celebrities in tow. Apparently, Victoria was spread out in all her glory and screamed the place down when they all crowded in. River laughs.
“I think every phone was capturing the moment. I’ll bet half of them are on, You Tube already. I haven’t laughed so much in years.”
I laugh with them. I don’t feel bad. She deserves it. What sort of woman does that, anyway? Maybe she will think next time she tries to grab somebody by the balls.
The tour is now well under way and sprits are still high. Eddie has deserted us for the next leg and Emily is stepping up again. I stretch out and close my eyes, picturing her sleeping just a few feet away. It feels good having her here. I’ve always been a bit of a loner and never met anyone I want to be around for longer than it takes to fuck them and leave them. Emily is the first girl I have ever loved. She is sweet and caring, with the body of a stripper. She’s not afraid of getting downright dirty with me and matches my sexual appetite. She makes me laugh and I love hearing the stories she tells. All in all, she is my perfect woman and I’m not letting anything happen to her.
Cody picks up his guitar and starts playing. River does the same and Tyler starts drumming with his pen on the table. I start to sing and they join in. The guys from security gather around and break open some beers. Then I see a sleepy Emily coming towards me looking like an Angel. She is wearing an oversized t-shirt and her hair is messy. She looks fantastic. She smiles, and it dazzles me.
I carry on singing and she sits beside me and puts her head on my shoulder. I put my arm around her and hold her close as I sing the ballad. Moments like this don’t come around too often. When all the stars align and the world rights itself. Everyone is in harmony and singing the same tune. I will hold onto this memory and carry it in my heart.
Emily
Hearing Jax and the guys stirs my soul. The music washes over me like a warm, cozy blanket. I feel blessed to be included in this tight circle of brotherhood. Surely life can’t get any better than this.
Logan and Sammie left for New York. Logan promised Jax that he would sort the Insurance policy out—whatever that meant. Carter has stayed with the tour and is currently sleeping in a room at the back. It feels good to have him here, and it makes me feel a whole lot safer.
By the time we reach Illinois, I feel calmer and able to carry on with my job.
And so it continues. We travel across America repeating every day the same as the one before. Jax and I grow even closer and the guys become my family. There are still pictures of Ashton and Amelia everywhere. It’s as if I’m in an untouchable bubble and they are strangers that have no part in my life.
Then two weeks later we reach Denver Colorado.
“Hurry up guys, the car needs to get you to the studio. You can’t be late.”
Cody grumbles.
“This is starting to get old. If one more person asks me what my favorite song is, I’m gonna hit them over the head with my guitar.”
River groans. “The one I hate the most is when they ask where we see ourselves in five years. How do I fucking know, I’m not psychic?”
Tyler laughs. “No, just psychotic.”
Jax grins as I start to get annoyed.
“Stop talking and start walking. Honestly, you guys will make me old before my time.”
He picks me up and hauls me over his shoulder, whacking my ass—hard. I shriek as he laughs.
“What do you say guys, shall we ditch the show and spend the afternoon annoying Emily instead?”
The guys laugh and Cody pretends to be angry.
“It’s ok for you two. I’m fed up with hearing your amorous antics in the bus. Spare a thought for the rest of us sad and lonely dick tugging dudes.”
Tyler snorts.
“From what I’ve seen you don’t need to tug your own dick. There’s been no shortage of girls to do it for you.”
Cody grins wolfishly. “Plenty more heading our way. I fully intend on fucking my way across America. One in every state and there will only be one winner—me.”
Tyler rolls his eyes. “You take the term- man whore, to a whole new level. One day you’ll be hit by that lightning bolt and I am gonna enjoy every minute.”
Cody laughs. “Right back at ya, bro.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever, now come on before I get a call from Eddie screaming at me for slacking in my job.”
We set off- finally and I am unrecognizable. I have a dark curly wig on and the usual glasses. The guys love my various changes of image and it has become a great source of amusement. Jax insists on fucking every one of my alter egos which I have no complaints about at all. He slides his arm around my waist and whispers.
“You look hot, Emily. Curly hair looks good on you.”
I shake my head. “Come on, Casanova, you’ve got work to do.”
He grins. “I’d rather do you.”
The guys laugh as I roll my eyes and say, “Fucking Rock Stars.”
The television studio is a huge building in the center of the town. Once again, security has to guide the guys through a sea of screaming fans and we are soon inside. Carter, as usual, sticks close to my side as we head up to the studio. They have assigned somebody to assist us and I wonder at the choice they made. The young pretty girl looks terrified as she tries to organize the guys. Cody is his usual predatory self, and she doesn’t appear able to deal with his advances very well. I do what I can, but she is about to learn the hard way what dealing with these guys involves.
The guys are soon whisked off to do their interview and I wait with Carter in the dressing room assigned to them, leaving them with the young girl.
We watch on a monitor in the room and everything seems fine. Carter is on his phone to his wife Sally. As I hear him speaking in a low, sexy voice to her I feel bad that I have dragged him away. He never complains but he must miss her very much.
I look at the TV again and my heart wrenches as yet another picture flashes up of Ashton. I’m prepared to see more of her as we are in her home state, but seeing her looking out at me with so much innocence tugs on my heart strings. I wonder where she is now?
I turn up the volume and see a man sitting in what appears to be her childhood bedroom. The look in his eyes destroys me inside. There is total devastation in that look, a father dealing with the trauma of losing a child and not knowing what has happened to her. In front of me is the grim reality of what those guys have done and it makes me angry. They have ruined these people’s lives for a sick moment of pleasure.
Then I feel a huge wave of guilt wash over me. I am no better than they are because I have kept my silence. Suddenly, the enormity of it all consumes me. I almost can’t breathe under the weight of responsibility. I can’t just sit around and do nothing; how can I possibly live with that?
Carter finishes his call
and I move over and whisper,
“Carter, I need your help.”
He raises his eyes. “Anything, honey. What do you have in mind?”
I wave towards the TV screen.
“I want to help Ashton’s father. He’s hurting and I have information about the possible person responsible for her disappearance. Is there any way I can get the name to him without anyone finding out about me?”
Carter looks thoughtful and I wait for him to work it out. Then he smiles and his eyes flick to the screen as another image of Ashton fills it as a young girl. His eyes darken and harden and he nods grimly.
“Leave it with me, honey. I will make sure he has the name and leave the rest up to him. He won’t know who sent it but I’m betting every lead is followed up and ripped to pieces.”
I sigh with relief and look at him gratefully. Whoever this Donahue is, deserves to be caught. There’s no telling how many other girls have disappeared by his hand and I may be next.
***
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Jax
I feel nervous, but then again, I always do before a live show. The other guys are also fairly quiet; even Cody seems preoccupied. Eddie arrived with his wife Helen. She’s a good friend of Emily’s and I’m glad she has someone female to talk to at last. It must be quite hard for her listening to our crude talk 24/7.
Emily is watching the show out front tonight in the VIP area. Hopefully, it will be dark enough to hide her identity but she is taking no chances and is wearing one of her crazy wigs.
Carter will also watch from the VIP area, which I’m glad about. He doesn’t say much, but he’s a good guy, I can tell. He must be very fond of Sammie and Logan to take this job on. If we are found to be sheltering Emily, then we will all have some explaining to do.
Not that I care. I would run to the furthest place up the highest mountain to keep her safe. Shaking myself, I try to switch my thoughts away from what hangs over us every hour of every day. Being without Emily would be like a part of me is missing—the most important part.
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