The Art Of Falling

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The Art Of Falling Page 6

by Julie Jarnagin


  Obviously in work mode, she wore black pants and a suit jacket and carried a clipboard. She met him on the grass in front of the house. “You ready for this?”

  He leaned in to hug her, but she seemed to tense at his touch. He blamed it on the pressure from the upcoming event, but a voice in the back of his mind worried it might be more than that.

  Ready to make a video—not really. Ready to spend an afternoon with Heather—absolutely. “Let’s do it.”

  “Scott, the videographer, will be here soon to set up the equipment.” She looked down at her clipboard. “We’ll get a few shots of you on horseback. Some video of the barn and the pasture. Don’t worry. It will be easy.”

  After the morning he’d had, easy would be good. “I can handle that. It has been quite a day.”

  She cocked her head to the side, like she was reading his mind. “How’s your mom?” she asked, instantly softening. “I’ve been thinking about her—and you.”

  Of course Heather would remember his mom. “I just got home. This whole thing is rough. My aunt is with her now. I’m going back over there when we’re done here.”

  Tears formed in Heather’s eyes. “What can I do for her? How can I help?”

  Her deep sympathy for a woman she’d only met on a few occasions amazed him every time he saw it. He didn’t know how her little body carried around such a huge heart. “When she’s feeling a little better, you could give her a call. She has been asking about you.”

  “Do you think she’s still going to come to the fundraiser? She seemed so excited about it.”

  The doctor had recommended his mom avoid being around groups because of her compromised immunity, but she’d lectured him about how this disease didn’t get to rule her life. When Wyatt had tried to back the doctor up, she’d shut that down. “Trust me. She’ll be there.”

  “Lorraine is so strong,” Heather said, her voice shaky.

  Heather had that strength too. She just didn’t know it yet. He could tell by the way she cared about people—his mom, her family. Having a heart as open as hers wasn’t for the weak. “She’s a survivor.”

  “Lorraine must be strong to be able to watch you on the back of those bulls.”

  Even after all these years, it still made his mom nervous when he competed. “She’s always supported me, but I think it’s still hard for her to watch.”

  Heather crossed her arms. “I can see why. A few days ago, I saw a video of you riding.”

  She’d watched videos of him? His stomach sank. Much like his mom telling him to stay off the online medical sites, watching bull riding videos would only make things worse for a worrywart like Heather. “How was it?”

  Her face scrunched. “It was awful. I could hardly stand it.”

  His mind raced through the rides she could have seen. He’d had plenty of injuries in his career. “The ones where I get injured look worse than they actually are.”

  “That’s the thing. It was supposedly a great ride, and it was still terrifying.” She stared at her hands. “I like you, Wyatt, and the thought of something happening to you scares me.”

  Those simple words—“I like you”— sent a charge through him. “Sometimes it looks like the bulls come closer to making contact than they do,” he said, doing his best to ease her fears. He’d given his mom the same explanation many times. Of course it never seemed to work, and by the look on Heather’s face, it wasn’t going to do the trick with her either.

  He rubbed his hand on her arm. “Hey, please don’t worry about me. I’m fine. I’m not a newbie anymore. I have experience on my side.”

  She shook her head. “You don’t understand. I’ve seen what can happen when people take big risks. I’ve seen the aftermath, and I can’t imagine having to go through that again.”

  He tipped her chin up where he could see her eyes. When a tear escaped and ran down her cheek, his chest felt like it might cave in. “Please don’t cry.” He wrapped his arms around her. Dealing with a bull he could handle, but he definitely was out of his depth with a woman’s tears.

  She pulled away, wiping away the wetness under her eyes. “When are you competing next?”

  Not wanting her to worry about him, he debated on whether or not to tell her, but her stern gaze pressed him for an answer. “I’m riding in Fort Worth this weekend.” His mom was usually there cheering him on, but he doubted she’d feel up to it. It would feel strange, looking up in the stands and not seeing her there.

  She blew out a shaky breath. “I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to you.”

  “It won’t.” He gently pressed his lips to her forehead. He’d just told a boldface lie, and they both knew it. No rodeo rider could promise that he wouldn’t get hurt or even worse, killed. It was a chance he took every time he climbed onto a bull, adjusted his glove, and waited for the chute to open.

  A van drove up the driveway.

  Heather pressed her fingers against her face, trying unsuccessfully to hide the evidence of her tears. “This is so unprofessional.”

  Wyatt touched her arm. “Why don’t you take a few minutes? I’ll see if he needs any help getting his equipment to the barn.”

  She nodded. “That would probably be best. Thanks.”

  He watched Heather walk away. Seeing her cry killed him, and he was the one responsible for causing her so much pain.

  Chapter Seven

  Behind the chutes at the arena, Wyatt rolled his shoulders, doing his best to relax and concentrate on his first ride, but his gaze shifted to the stands. His mom not being there was a bittersweet reminder of all she was battling. And his thoughts kept spinning back to Heather who’d pulled away again after the video shoot.

  Focus. He forced his mind back to the task at hand and stretched his arm out in front of him. He needed to stay loose, to keep his mind from wandering back to—

  Heather rounded the corner, and his heart froze at the sight of her. What was she doing here? She was the last person he’d expected to show up, and the one he was most excited to see.

  In a bright red shirt, she looked beautiful, even with the color drained from her face.

  He jogged over to her, his chaps thumping against his legs and his spurs clanging. “What are you doing here?”

  She swallowed, anxiety written all over her face. “I talked to your mom.” Her voice wobbled. “When she told me she couldn’t be here, I decide to come fill in for her.”

  Just when he thought she couldn’t get any more selfless, she surprised him. He leaned in and kissed her softly. “Heather, that’s so sweet, but you coming by is enough. You don’t have to watch me ride.” A video clip of him riding had driven her to tears, but here she was, ready to be there for him.

  She frowned. “I want to do this. For you and for Lorraine. I can represent her.”

  “I know how many emotions this kind of thing stirs up for you.” After what happened with her brother, he didn’t fault her for them. “There’s no reason to put yourself through it.”

  Stepping away from him, she stood straighter. “Everyone is always telling me not to face anything I’m afraid of. Where has that gotten me? You and your mom take everything head on. That’s what I need to do.”

  Well, shoot. Who was he to argue with that? “You sure about this?”

  She nodded a little too fast, much like she had on the back of the horse.

  His hand, already wrapped in the white tape he wore under his leather glove, took hers. “You have no idea how glad I am you came.”

  She pointed at one of his fellow riders wearing a helmet with a face guard. “Do you have one of those things?”

  Right now, he wished he’d brought his just to put her mind at ease, but he’d never gotten the feel for riding in one. He put his hand against his chest. “I have this protective vest, my chaps, my hat…everything I need.”

  Her brow wrinkled, and she bit the inside of her lip. “You’re going to be okay, right?”

  “Remember, I do this all the time. It’s an
other day at the office for me.”

  She nodded again.

  He put both hands on her face and kissed her, riding a surge of emotion. She’d come to watch him. “I love you, Heather.” The words emerged in a rush of honesty, before he could think about how she would react. But he did love her, and he wanted her to know.

  Her mouth parted, but then, her expression shifted from surprise to a tentative smile. “I love you, too, Wyatt.”

  She hugged him, and he breathed in her sweet scent.

  Her arms squeezed him even tighter than usual. “Now, please be careful.”

  He laughed. “I will. I promise.”

  She started walking away but turned and looked back at him with a grin. There went any hope of getting relaxed before his ride. Adrenaline pumped through him as if he’d already ridden, but he didn’t care. He’d wanted to tell Heather he loved her since…well, almost since the first time he’d seen her. Every day they’d spent together had only confirmed it.

  “Lawrence,” someone yelled from the chutes.

  It was time to get to work.

  Focus.

  As he lowered himself onto a bull named Bloodvein a few minutes later, it hit him he might be in trouble. The routine he usually went through leading up to rides had been missing, and he felt out of his regular rhythm. He wasn’t focused or relaxed. Right now, his heart was thudding, and everything felt…off.

  Readjusting his hand, he searched for a comfortable position. He could do this. He was ready. He could get through the ride. Focus.

  Running out of time, he gave the nod before he could talk himself out of it. The gate opened, and the bull thrust them both out into the arena. Bloodvein kicked and spun, and Wyatt’s hand still felt wrong. Instead of concentrating on gaining points from the judges, he needed to simply make it until the eight-second ride clock sounded.

  Then the bull changed directions, and Wyatt felt himself slip further out of position. The next thing he knew, he was airborne and then, down with the dark underbelly of the bull above him. On instinct, he rolled as hooves fell. Then he felt himself being dragged through the dirt. He looked up, and two men were pulling him away as a rodeo clown grabbed the attention of the bull.

  At the edge of the arena, one of them held Wyatt’s hat out to him. “You okay, man? That was a close one.”

  Taking what felt like the first breath since he’d been bucked off the bull, he nodded. “Yeah. Too close.”

  He put his hat back on his head and waved at the crowd to let them know he was okay. Cheers rose from the stands.

  His gaze quickly found the red shirt, and his heart broke when he saw Heather’s pale face, streaked with tears.

  #

  In her car, shame chased Heather all the way back to her townhouse, where she punched the code into the alarm keypad by her door. Back home where she belonged, she chided herself for not waiting to tell Wyatt goodbye. All she could think of after his ride was getting out of there. She’d thought she could handle it, but when she’d almost seen her worst fear come true right in front of her eyes, she discovered she’d been wrong.

  Memories of finding out about her brother’s accident had come crashing back to her. That moment she’d collapsed under the weight of the grief and prayed that it was only a bad dream.

  She dropped her keys and phone on the counter and pressed her back against the cool wall of her kitchen. It hadn’t just been the near accident that rattled her. She’d told him she loved him, and she’d meant it with everything in her. But she was terrified. Afraid of what might happen to him. Afraid she might let him down. Afraid she couldn’t be the supportive woman he needed by his side.

  One ride had wrecked her? How was she supposed to stand by him when she couldn’t even watch a single rodeo without feeling like the anxiety would crush her?

  She did love Wyatt, but today was an ugly reminder of why this couldn’t work. Loving Wyatt wasn’t something she was cut out for. He deserved someone stronger.

  Her phone buzzed on the counter.

  Wyatt.

  She hit the button to ignore it, not knowing what she could say to him right now.

  The fundraiser was next weekend. She needed to get through it, and then they’d figure out the rest. Maybe by then she’d have the strength to do what she knew she needed to do—tell Wyatt goodbye.

  Chapter Eight

  Wyatt walked through the lobby of the museum, anxious to see Heather. She’d avoided his calls after the rodeo, and when she’d finally talked to him, she’d been distant, only saying she was fine and that she was going to be busy this week getting ready for the fundraiser.

  Technically, today was a business meeting to go over all the details of the event in a few days, but anything that got him in the same room with Heather would be an improvement.

  He understood if his near-accident had shaken her. It had unnerved him too, but if she regretted the “I love you’s” they’d exchanged, that might destroy him.

  Wyatt found Heather with two other people at a round table in the corner of her office.

  “The caterers are going to be making beef tenderloin with braised rapini and bacon wrapped serrano shrimp,” a blond with a huge binder in front of her said. “It will be elegant enough for the guest list but have enough of the rustic elements to fit the theme.”

  Wyatt didn’t know what braised rapini was, but beef and bacon sounded good to him. He knocked on the door frame. “I’m sorry to interrupt. The receptionist told me to come on back.”

  Heather smiled at him, but something had changed. There was sadness behind her smile. “We just finished up.”

  After a quick round of introductions, the event planner and Heather’s coworker left him alone with Heather. He kissed her on the cheek, and he thought he felt her tense. He chalked it up to it being such an important time at work for her. He wouldn’t allow himself to consider other possibilities. “So how do you feel about the event?”

  She blew out a breath. “There’s still a lot to do, but other than a few little fires we had to put out, everything is going according to plan.”

  Studying her, he wished he could read her mind. “You’ll be great. When this is all over, we’ll get to see each other.” Wouldn’t they?

  “Uh huh,” she said, picking up a stack of papers. “Let’s go over the agenda for Friday night.”

  His heart sank. This didn’t look good. “Heather, wait. We need to talk.”

  Her gaze didn’t meet his. “About what?”

  “The ride the other day. I had no idea it would end up being so dramatic.”

  The mask she’d been wearing melted, and her shoulders slumped. She lowered herself into her desk chair. “It’s not your fault. It’s just that… I don’t know if I can… This is harder than I thought it would be.”

  Panic rising in his throat, he sat in the chair beside her. “It’s not always like that, and you don’t ever have to come to watch me if you don’t want to. I’ll completely understand.”

  She swallowed. “We’re so different, Wyatt. You live on the edge, and I’m not comfortable being out there with you.”

  His chest tightened. “What are you saying?”

  Staring down at her hands, she shook her head. “I don’t know if I can keep doing this.”

  “Then I’ll stop bull riding.” He was surprised the words had popped out of his mouth, but he would give it up for Heather. He would quit, right then and there. With everything his mom was going through, he realized what was most important in life.

  Her gaze moved up to him, compassion in her eyes. “This isn’t an ultimatum, Wyatt. I don’t want you to give up your dream for me. You deserve to be with someone who can embrace all of you.”

  He bolted to his feet. “I don’t want someone else!” The words emerge louder than he’d meant them to.

  She stood. “I wish I had the strength to be the right person for you.”

  He searched for a way to change her mind. “You are strong, Heather. You don’t give your
self enough credit. It’s okay to be afraid. There are things I’m scared of too.” Like losing you.

  Her expression was calm, too calm, like she’d already made up her mind. “I can’t live in constant fear of losing you. Like I lost Craig.”

  Heather was slipping further away from him. He knew she carried the hurt of losing her brother everywhere she went. “I know you miss your brother. I know you never want to go through anything like that again, but you can’t throw what we have away because you’re afraid. You could miss out on the life that God has planned for you.” He took her hand. “I love you, and you love me. That’s enough.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know. Is it?”

  His chest felt the blow of her words. He’d escaped the bull, but he hadn’t been able to escape this. “It is for me.”

  “Let’s just focus on getting through the fundraiser,” she said quietly.

  “And then what?”

  “And then we both do our best to go on like we were before.”

  Impossible. Heather had changed him, and he didn’t know how to go back to the man he’d been before he met her.

  Chapter Nine

  At the Gala, Wyatt smiled for everyone he met, but inside he was unsettled. Seeing Heather tonight was nearly unbearable. It didn’t help that she looked unbelievably gorgeous in a long black dress cascading down her like water.

  He held his breath as she approached, doing his best to put on a good face. The least he could do was try to make her night a success.

  She stood between a man with slicked back hair and a woman wearing a diamond necklace. “Wyatt, I’d like to introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Harrison. They are wonderful supporters of the museum.”

  Which meant they gave large sums of money. He tore his eyes from Heather to shake their hands. “It’s great to meet you.”

  The man moved around beside him and slapped him on the back. “We were excited you’d be here tonight. We’ve heard you’ve had a lot of success on the circuit. Looks like you’ll be a contender in the World Championships next year.”

 

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