by Laura Wright
Show Emily he was going to be there no matter what.
Maybe show himself that too.
“What are you doing?”
He poked his head out of the closet. His mother was standing just inside the door, looking around, curious. “Just cleaning up.”
“Why?” she asked, confused. Then without waiting for an answer, her hands flew to her cheeks, and she gasped. “Oh, Blue, are you moving back into the house?”
The pure, undisguised joy on her face made his gut wrench. It was hard sometimes to face the truth that this woman wasn’t just the person who’d lied to him his entire life. She’d also been his caretaker, his nurse, his friend, his supporter. Goddamn, he missed it. Missed her.
But anger and resentment was a stronger force than sentimentality.
“I may be moving back in,” he said. “But I won’t be alone if I do.”
Again, Elena looked confused. “Are you talking about your brothers?”
He sniffed with derision. “Don’t have brothers.”
She gave him a look. Pursed her lips. No doubt she was getting tired of hearing his passive-aggressive bullshit. Didn’t stop her from trying to reason with him though. “Blue, ’course you do. And they want to build this bridge you keep tearing down.”
He turned away. He wasn’t up for talking about the past or the present. He was doing something for the future. That’s all he wanted to think about.
“If it’s not for a Cavanaugh,” she pressed him, “who’s it for?”
Six months ago, Blue would’ve told her everything. No doubt with a huge smile on his face. She would’ve loved it. She was going to be a grandma. Every mama’s dream. But it was a gift. That knowledge. And right now, today, it was a gift he wasn’t ready to give.
“I’m going to keep working on this,” he said.
She didn’t say anything for a moment. Then, “I can help you. I’d be happy to.”
“No.” He looked back at her once again. Was resolute. “Thank you. I’ve got it.”
He felt the weight of her disappointment. It saturated the air between them. There was a part of him that despised himself for treating Elena like this. No matter what had happened, what she’d done, she was still his mother, and she deserved his respect. But the rest of him, the raw nerve he was now, just couldn’t allow it. When you are vulnerable with someone, to someone, and they betray you, that bond, that respect, is severed. Who knew how it could be fused again. Or if . . .
For a moment, as Elena stood there in the doorway, Blue thought she was going to keep pressing him, ask him to reconsider. But she didn’t. Without another word, she turned and left the room. And his gut wrenched once again.
* * *
Emily didn’t make it a habit of showing up at people’s homes or work, but this morning she’d woken up with an urgency that couldn’t be ignored. She imagined she’d be feeling a lot of that over the next nine months.
“I want to talk to the owner.”
Aubrey was seated behind her metal desk in her small office at River Black Properties. Her makeup was expertly applied, but when she smiled up at Emily, there was a bit of pink lipstick on her teeth. “Oh, honey, is that why you’re here? I thought you did the smart thing and asked your parents for the money.”
No, she hadn’t asked them. Hell, she hadn’t even told them about her little crescent yet. She wanted things in place before she did. “I think if I could just explain things, we could work something out.”
“Emily,” Aubrey began with that look that begged someone to just stop right there, since whatever they were about to say was futile.
But Emily was immune to nonverbal negativity. Especially when it stood in the way of her future. “The thing is, people who grew up here in River Black . . . You know, there’s an understanding, a respect for hard work and . . . special circumstances.”
“What special circumstances?”
She shook her head. Aubrey wasn’t getting that news yet. Not before her family did. “All I’m saying is, they want to help each other out.”
“Of course, but—”
“And I have a sizable down payment,” Emily added quickly.
“There’s an offer on the table, hon.” Aubrey looked sheepish, like it was really the last thing she wanted to tell her eager client. “All cash.”
Emily stopped, stared. “No.”
“I’m sorry, hon.”
This couldn’t be happening. Really. Her head started to spin. The property she’d been coveting and working toward owning for two years suddenly had an offer on it. Granted, people came around to look at the space from time to time, but no one committed. It was so small . . . “Is it a client of yours?”
“No,” Aubrey told her gently. “It’s an out-of-towner actually. Well, sort of. He used to live here when he was a boy. James Cavanaugh.”
Her guts flipped over. Cavanaugh? “The horse-whisperer guy?”
Aubrey nodded.
And Blue’s half brother. “Why in the world would he want business property in town? He’s a celebrity who travels. This doesn’t make sense.”
Aubrey shook her head. “No idea. Except maybe he’s moving back? Got that fiancée now, horses on the Triple C property. All the Cavanaugh brothers seem to be showing their faces ’round here lately. And no one’s decided on who’s going to take over that ranch of theirs.”
A sullen quiet came over Emily, and her shoulders fell. It was the last thing she’d expected in coming here. She gave Aubrey a forced smile. “Okay then.”
“I am real sorry, Emily. But when you’re ready, we’ll find you another place. Just as good. Better!”
“Sure” was all she could say. As she left the office, her stomach felt like a lead balloon. When she was ready? She was ready now. Like, big-time ready. And she didn’t want another property. Hell, there weren’t many to be had around River Black. And the few she’d seen were too big, too expensive, and didn’t have the office and living space she wanted.
She walked down the sunlit street toward the property she felt was meant for her. Her flower shop. Her future. This baby was coming—and its mother just had to be settled into a solid career and a business of her own before it did.
As she passed the diner, she spotted the eldest Cavanaugh brother, Deacon. Tall and broad like his half brother, the man was seated at the counter having breakfast. Emily knew Deacon had purchased land just outside town, had built a massive ranch property, and had married the Triple C’s foreman, Mackenzie Byrd. Were those boys back home to stay? Was Aubrey right? And if so, what did that mean for Blue? His life, his work—where he belonged?
You need to worry about yourself and this baby right now. Blue can take care of himself.
She inhaled sharply. Maybe there was something she could do . . . maybe the person she needed to talk to wasn’t the current owner of the property—but the potential new one.
James Cavanaugh.
Eleven
Mucking stalls was pretty much the worst job on the ranch. But hell, he’d lost a bet with Frank, so there it was. Kicking some shit off his boot, Blue headed into the next stall. He had six more to go before he could stop for lunch, and boy was he hungry. Breakfast had pretty much been a bust, and that cooler over by the door was calling his name.
That is, until someone else did.
“Hey there,” came an old, grizzled-sounding voice Blue knew as well as he knew his own. “Found this little lady wandering around. You ever seen her before?”
“Sam,” the woman chided. “For cripes’ sake, you know me. And I know you. Burger, rare with sharp cheddar, bacon, and plenty of hot sauce.”
Blue turned, his gut tightening at the sound of Emily Shiver’s voice. It had this sweet, smartass quality to it. Out of bed anyway, he thought as he stood up and looked over the stall door. Christ Almighty, he shouldn’t be thinking stuff like that. And yet, as she walked toward him, the Triple C’s barn manager beside her, all Blue could do was think about it. Her hair was in a sort o
f side braid with a few small white flowers tucked in. She was wearing a pale pink sundress that was tight up top and at the waist. And if that wasn’t bad enough, the pretty thing was cut to midthigh, and Emily Shiver had the longest, sexiest legs he’d ever seen.
Wrapped around me and holding on tight, even better.
His nostrils flared. Shouldn’t be thinking things like that. Emily Shiver was not his woman. She was the mother of his child—and he needed to keep that straight. Especially as the months rolled on, and they became closer . . . friends.
“Hey, Blue,” she said as she approached, her expression a little wary. Or was it shy? He didn’t know. Hell, he didn’t know all that much about her, and yet he wanted to. Really wanted to.
“Howdy.” He touched the brim of his hat. He might be an irritated jerk most of the time lately, but his mama had raised him to be a gentleman. And that didn’t leave a body once it was ingrained. He gave Sam a wry look. “The lady is here to see me. So feel free to get back to whatever you were doin’.”
“Why’d she be here for you?” Sam challenged with a snort. “That’s like a rainbow seeking out a bucket of horseshit.”
“A little too on the nose there, cowboy,” Blue said dryly, knocking his chin in the direction of his pitchfork.
“Actually,” Emily said with a little shrug, “I came to see James.”
“Ha!” Sam said with a chuckle, pointing at Blue with glee. “What’d I tell ya?”
Blue’s upper lip curled, heat snaking through him. A wicked heat. One he hadn’t felt in a long time. Strange . . . What was that? A jealous heat? Cripes, no. Couldn’t be that. With grit, he pushed the feeling down below the surface of his skin, but that kind of heat refused to be repressed.
“Haven’t seen him around,” he told her with just a hint of irritation. “Why you lookin’?”
With the toe of her boot she kicked a single horse plop he’d yet to pick up. “Just need to discuss something with him; that’s all.”
Discuss something? With James? Did they even know each other? And how well? Blue’s gut twisted. He didn’t like this at all. He put the pitchfork against the wall and came out of the stall, nearly colliding with that scuffed up wheelbarrow full of manure, the one that had no doubt been used for the same job for the past fifty years.
“Hey, Sam,” he said. “My mom made fried chicken for lunch. I know she has extra if you’re interested.”
The old man’s eyes narrowed. He looked from Blue to Emily, scrunching up his lips. Hell, he could contemplate all he wanted to, but no one could resist Elena’s fried chicken. Not even for some potentially juicy barn drama. In seconds, the man was shrugging, giving up, wishing Emily well, and heading out of the barn.
“So is James staying here?” she asked. “Or is he in town? At the hotel?”
Blue took off his gloves and tossed them on a nearby bench. “What do you want with him?” he asked a little too brusquely. “You know he’s engaged, don’t ya?”
Her chin lifted and her eyes locked with his. “Of course I know that.” Those eyes narrowed and her lips thinned. “What are you implying?”
He blew out a breath. What was he implying? More like imagining. Not wanting to imagine. “Look, I’m sorry,” he said at a near growl. “Didn’t mean anything. He’s coming by later. I can tell him you want to talk to him.”
She held on to her ire for a couple more moments, then seemed to shake it off. “Okay. Thanks.”
He nodded.
“See you.”
“Yeah, see you.” He waited for her to turn around and leave. After all, she hadn’t come by for him . . . But she didn’t move. Just stood there surrounded by all the ancient tack and hay bales. “Are you all right?” he asked her with a gentleness he hadn’t believed still existed inside him. “You feeling okay?”
“I’m fine.”
She didn’t sound all that convincing, and it made his instincts flare. Dammit. What’d she want with James? How were they connected? Was his half brother going to make her feel better? Put that pretty smile of hers back on her face? Christ . . . he didn’t like that. Really didn’t like that. Not that he was going to show it. Vulnerability was an unforgiving asshole. You opened yourself up to it and ran the risk of being destroyed.
And yet, the pull of something beyond logic and reason and lessons learned was in play . . . “I want you to know,” he began. “I’m here for you and this baby.”
Her eyes widened, but she didn’t say anything.
“Things started how they did,” he continued, “and that can’t be changed. Hell, wouldn’t want it changed. But like I said last night, I want to be around.”
“I know, Blue.”
What was that, he wondered, in her eyes? Sadness? Worry? He was trying like hell to alleviate some of that. “Not just a few hours here and there either.” His gaze dropped, momentarily settling on her flat stomach. “I want to see it grow. I want to feel it move.”
She released a breath. Weighty. And a sudden softness touched her expression. “I would like that, Blue.”
A bit of her hair had escaped her braid and was sort of covering one eye. She looked so damn beautiful. Without thinking, he reached up and tucked the strand behind her ear, then let his fingers drift down her cheekbone. She had the softest skin.
Her breath caught and she leaned into his touch.
His eyes searched hers. “What? What’s wrong?”
“How do we do this? You? Me? The baby?”
His nostrils flared and his chest expanded. “We’ll figure it out.”
She didn’t say anything.
“Yeah?” he prodded. He needed to know she believed him.
She nodded, her cheeks going pink again. He couldn’t help himself. He ran his thumb over that cheek once again. Oh yeah. Softest goddamned skin on the planet. Christ, he wanted to kiss her. Just a taste. The bottom lip . . . that full one . . . just one taste; then you let her go. Without thinking too hard on it, he leaned in. Right away, she closed her eyes. Parted her lips. Pink and full, and so ready. Blue stared at her mouth. Seconds ticked by. What was wrong with him? The breeze off the meadow came rushing into the barn. The Triple C’s barn. Shit, what was happening to him? His entire body humming with a need he hadn’t felt since that night . . . that night they’d created the life inside Emily.
Overtaken with far too many emotions he refused to deal with—not now anyway—Blue eased back, releasing her.
Instantly, Emily opened her eyes. And when she realized what had happened—and what hadn’t—she turned bright red.
Blue’s chest tightened. He was such an ass. He wanted to kiss her. Like a drowning man wanted air. And she’d wanted him too. So what was he doing pulling back?
She moved away from him. “I should go.” Her voice was slightly breathless.
No. Fuck no, she shouldn’t go. She should stay here until he figured out what screw was loose in his brain, what piece of his wrecked heart was missing.
“Let you get back to mucking stalls.” She forced a smile. Didn’t get anywhere near her eyes. She was upset, confused, embarrassed.
And he was the ass who had made her feel like that.
“I appreciate that,” he said dryly, then gave her a sort of half smile that was supposed to carry an apology along with it. “Nothing I’d rather be doing.”
She returned the tight smile. “I’m sure. How’d you get stuck with that job anyway?”
“Lost a bet.”
She laughed softly, shook her head. “You boys and your bets.”
“Yeah,” he said. Goddammit, he was always so afraid of getting close whenever he was around this woman. He wanted her. Just wanted to taste her, feel her lips on his. Again. Sober this time. Then grab her, idiot. Fuck the fear and take her in your arms and kiss her like you want to—like she wants you to.
But he didn’t. Pussy. He stayed where he was and cracked a joke. Best medicine there was for keeping distance between people. Lose the emotion and go hard on the humor. �
��That’s why you’re really taking off, isn’t it?” he said. “Between the sweat and the manure, you can barely stand to be around me, right?”
“Clearly I can stand it just fine,” she said dryly.
Oh yeah. He was an ass. A stupid, scared ass.
“Besides,” she continued, “I come from ranching people. Sweat and manure is a special brand of cologne ’round these parts.” Her eyes filled with a sad warmth. “You wear it well, Blue.”
He stared at her then. The humor he’d been clinging to falling away. This woman. Not only did she cast fear into his cold heart, but she made him question things. Like what he was doing. Why he was doing it. If maybe something good and real could actually be possible in his life. And then the weight of all that had gone down over the past month snaked through him again, biting at every hopeful thought.
“Better get to these stalls,” he said, turning away. “But I’ll make sure to tell James you stopped by. If I see him.”
“Okay,” she said.
Blue heard her walking away, then stop.
“I’m telling my parents tonight,” she called out to him.
His head came up and his eyes connected with hers. “That won’t be easy.”
“Maybe not. But I suppose it’s got to go better than how you found out.” She gave him a half smile and shrug.
He laughed softly. “Hopefully it won’t end in anyone’s arrest.”
“Right,” she agreed. “Okay. Well. See you later?”
“You will,” he said.
She nodded, then turned to go.
