by M. A. Innes
As we started to hit the button for the elevator, the doors opened. Out walked the two guys from the meeting. I stared in shock, losing their names for a minute. Bryan recovered first, although I could see he was surprised as well.
“Hey, guys. I didn’t realize you lived here.”
“Yeah. We’re that one.” The taller one pointed to the apartment next door to ours.
“Cool. Looks like we’re going to be neighbors, then.”
“That’s great. When are you moving in?” The shorter one, whose name I thought was Kevin, gave us a big smile.
“This afternoon. We’re heading down to sign the papers now.” I’d recovered enough to find my brain, but I still couldn’t believe the only people on campus who knew about the private part of our relationship lived right next door.
“Come on up when you’re done signing everything. You guys hungry? We can order some pizza. Then we’ll help you move.”
Bryan looked over to me and I nodded. We could use the help and the new friends. Bryan smiled and looked excited as we entered the elevator. “Sounds good. We’ll see you in a few minutes.”
It didn’t take long to fill out the paperwork. There’d be more to fill out if we renewed the lease next year, but for now, it was pretty basic. As we walked back over to the apartment, we started talking about everything we would need.
“Do you think your mom has a spare mattress?” I couldn’t remember seeing any around the house that wasn’t being used.
Bryan shrugged. “I don’t think so. That’s probably something we’ll need to buy. How much do you think they run?”
“I have no idea. The only thing I can picture is those expensive ones from the commercials and we don’t need something like that.” There had to be cheaper ones.
“So you don’t want to spend a couple of thousand dollars on a mattress?” Bryan was teasing but it still sent a shiver down my spine.
“No, thanks. I think we can have fun on something cheaper.”
He pretended to be offended, tilting his head and giving me an exaggerated frown. “I think I’m worth more than a cheap mattress.”
“I plan on doing all kinds of things to you and not only on the mattress, Baby.” Growling out the words, I watched him blush as he hit the button to go back up to the apartment.
By the time we knocked on the guys’ door, we both looked reasonably normal. At least, I hoped we did. They knew we were a bit unique but I still wasn’t sure how much of us I was ready to show other people. And not like naughty stuff…but just the little things like teasing.
We’d work it out eventually. But for now, I thought trying to downplay it might be the best choice. Maybe. Hell, I didn’t know. I hadn’t felt the need to hide things from Sarah and Richard. This probably shouldn’t be any different. I wasn’t sure what their take on the lifestyle was, but they didn’t seem to feel the need to judge ours. I was overthinking, but I couldn’t help it. I’d feel better once I could get a handle on them.
When Kevin opened the door—Bryan had laughed at me earlier when I’d double-checked their names—he seemed honestly glad to see us. “Great timing. Pizza should be here any minute. Pepperoni okay?”
“Sounds great.” Bryan seemed relaxed but I could see the tension in his body. He was trying, though. I knew it was for my sake.
“Sure.” I was starving. Breakfast hadn’t been big enough.
Walking into their place, it was so put together and like a real home, I was surprised. I’d been expecting typical dorm stuff, but this felt like a house.
“Nice place.” I hadn’t thought about how ours should look yet. I’d just been thinking about necessities and basic stuff. Suddenly, I felt like I hadn’t been planning it right. I hadn’t been jealous too many times in my life. It was weird.
“We’re going to have to get you guys to help decorate.” Bryan’s laughing words echoed my thoughts.
“What do you have so far? You were in the dorms, right?” Jeremy was in the kitchen getting glasses out of the cabinet. “Soda okay? I’ve also got milk and water.”
Bryan looked at me and I could see the wheels turning in his head. Decision time. Soda would be the normal option, but he’d already had coffee this morning. I was in charge, so it was up to me to set the tone. “Water for me, thanks. And milk for Bryan.”
Bryan’s cheeks pinked a little but he didn’t say anything. He just started looking around like he was analyzing the furniture. Jeremy seemed to relax at my choice. Maybe he took it as a sign we were going to try and be ourselves around them? Maybe it was that we weren’t trying to deny what they’d learned about us the other day? Maybe I was overthinking things again? Quite possibly.
As Jeremy got our drinks, Kevin leaned against the counter and watched us. “So you don’t have anything yet? When were you planning on moving in?”
Bryan piped up before I could say anything. “Tonight. I don’t mind the floor.”
Jeremy laughed, “Dorms didn’t work, huh?”
“No. That would be an understatement.” Jeremy reached out to hand me my glass. “Thanks.”
“Not a problem. We’re just glad to have better neighbors.”
That had Kevin nearly rolling on the floor laughing. Bryan looked at him like he was crazy. “What?”
Jeremy shook his head at his husband and looked back at us. “FYI, the walls are a little thin. And the people who recently moved out…well, let’s say they weren’t the most tolerant of loud noises.”
Kevin managed to catch his breath enough to talk. “You should have seen them the first week we were here. They gave us such dirty looks.”
“So you two are loud, huh? Screamers?” I shouldn’t have teased but I couldn’t help it.
Jeremy laughed and this time it was Kevin’s turn to blush. “Possibly.”
“We might have to set some ground rules then, so everyone can get some sleep. No scenes between ten and six.” Everyone laughed and I was saved from having to hear what they thought of my teasing when the pizza arrived.
It didn’t take long to get the food dished out and we all sat down. They even had a real dining table. I was used to eating on the couch or in the cafeteria. It was a little weird. I’d just taken a bite when Jeremy spoke up.
“What kind of help do you guys need? We know how hard it is to start from scratch.”
I had to think for a minute while I chewed. My to-do list was crazy at this point, so I wasn’t going to turn down help. “We need to get our stuff from the dorms and some basic things like groceries. Bryan’s mom sent us with a big box of kitchen stuff that will get us started there. I guess the other big thing that we need to figure out right away is a bed.”
“And jobs,” Bryan said taking a sip of his milk.
Kevin looked like he was ready to tackle everything on our list. “We can help with the moving and show you the store where we got our bed. It’s not great, but they’re cheap and might even be able to deliver today.”
“What kind of jobs are you looking for?” Jeremy leaned back in his chair, looking at us both.
“No idea,” I told him, shaking my head. “We’ve got a little time to figure it out, but I can’t put it off too long.”
“What’s your major?” Jeremy seemed to be a planner; I could see the wheels turning in his head.
“Accounting with a minor in finance. But I’m not sure I’ll be able to find anything part-time that relates to it.”
“Are you any good? Not judging, but what I mean is, do you have any experience with any of the software that’s out there?” He looked like he was afraid he’d offended me.
I wasn’t sure where Jeremy was going with the idea, but he had me curious. “I’ve got a little. I’ve played around with a few programs and I’m doing well in my classes.”
“Have you thought about starting up a bookkeeping business? Like doing the accounting for small companies and people who run their own business? I do freelance graphic design and it’s hard to find someone who won’t charge
an arm and a leg to help out with that kind of stuff.” Jeremy paused and leaned forward to take a bite.
It wasn’t what I had been expecting to hear. I could see even Bryan was surprised. I hadn’t thought about starting my own company. When I’d thought about jobs, it was always working for someone else. “I hadn’t thought about it. I’m not sure what to say.”
“Jeremy’s a planner.” Kevin looked over at his husband, love clear on his face.
“I thought that if you have some time before you had to have an income coming in, it might be an idea. I could help get a website set up for you and help with some basic marketing. No charge. We’ll call it the friends-and-neighbors discount.” He smiled and cocked his head, watching my reaction.
I looked over at Bryan. “What do you think?”
He smiled. “I think it’s a great idea. It’s more long-term than we were thinking, but that’s probably the right move anyway.”
I had to agree. “No point in getting a job doing something that doesn’t relate to accounting at all. At least if I can make this work, it will look good on my resume later if I decide to work for someone else.”
And I’d be home more with Bryan. I wouldn’t have to leave him alone and spend hours doing something boring. He could play in the evenings while I got work done. I was starting to like the idea more and more. I glanced back over at Jeremy. “You don’t mind helping me set it up? I don’t want to take up too much of your time, but it would be great if I could make it work.”
“No. I’m working on a few small projects right now but nothing that will make it hard to find time to fit your stuff in. It will be fun. Besides, I’m counting on some help with my books. I can do the designs, but I need a good system for the money side of things. And there aren’t many accounting companies willing to work with college students starting a business. We don’t look real enough for them to want to bother with.”
“I don’t mind helping at all.” It sounded like a fun challenge but nothing that would be impossible.
Kevin spoke up, “Back to the practical things that need to be done first. How about Bryan and I get his stuff from the dorms and then groceries? You two can go buy the mattress and then get Maddox’s stuff from his room. That way we can get everything done today.”
Bryan looked at me, nodding. “Sounds like a plan.”
If he wasn’t nervous about spending time alone with Kevin, then I wasn’t going to argue. It would make everything easier and it would give them time to get to know each other. Bryan needed more friends who understood him and made him comfortable. “Agreed.”
Finishing up lunch, we helped clean up and then started out the door. When we got to the cars, I gave Bryan a quick kiss. “Don’t start anything with your roommate. If he’s there, ignore him and get everything packed up as quickly as you can. Text me if you have a problem.”
He gave the other two guys a quick look and took a deep breath before leaning in closer to me, whispering into my ear. “I’ll be fine, Daddy. Love you.”
I gave him another kiss on his cheek. So cute, but he was trying. “Love you too, Baby. I’ll see you back here in a couple of hours. You have your key, right?”
I meant the key to the apartment, but Bryan blushed an interesting shade of purple before he realized what I was talking about. “Um, yes.”
Kevin laughed. “You have to tell me what that was about.”
I wasn’t sure how Bryan would react. But he managed to give Kevin a small smile, shaking his head as he climbed into the car. “Hell, no.”
Keeping my fingers crossed he would be okay, I turned to Jeremy. “Ready to go?”
He gave me an understanding look. “Kevin won’t drive him too crazy. We already had a talk about being nosy.”
I laughed, glad he understood my concerns. “Bryan’s shy. We don’t have that many people who know anything beyond the fact that we’re boyfriends.”
Jeremy nodded in agreement but he had the strangest look on his face. I couldn’t figure it out. “I can relate to that.”
He didn’t volunteer anything specific, but I could tell he was still deciding how much to share. That was okay with me. I’d feel the same way if the situations were reversed.
“All right, where’s this bed store? No matter what Bryan said, I have no desire to sleep on the floor tonight.”
“It sounds like it would be better than sleeping in the dorms. From the look on Bryan’s face, you guys had it rough.”
“You have no idea. We got stuck with crazy this year.” Climbing into Jeremy’s car, things were starting to look up. We had our apartment, an idea for a job, and some new friends who seemed to be open-minded. Maybe I’d been worried over nothing.
CHAPTER 15
Bryan
I was hoping Kevin would take it easy on me while it was just the two of us, but no such luck. As soon as we pulled out of the parking lot, he turned to look at me, curiosity clear on his face. “So, the milk thing. That was him being in charge, right?”
Dear God, someone save me.
“Um, yes.” Maybe that would be enough?
“Why?”
Huh? I shouldn’t have encouraged him but I did anyway. “What do you mean?”
Kevin paused, and with a quick glance, I could see he was trying to figure out how to say what he was thinking. “Why the drink? Why make that a thing between you?”
“Why let him have control of that decision?” I was doing better with this conversation than I expected. I think having to focus on driving was helping. I’d had a good idea what I was getting into when we went over for lunch. Me, myself, and I had a long conversation, while Maddox was finishing up grilling the management lady, about what I was going to do.
We decided I was going to try and be open. Try being the operative word.
I couldn’t decide how much I was willing to talk about, but I figured I could wing that part and clam up when I got too nervous. It would probably happen automatically anyway. I hoped I didn’t do something stupid like try and hide or pass out. Maddox wanted friends, but it was more than that. Kevin needed someone. I wasn’t sure what they were into, besides the obvious, but it was clear he wanted someone who could understand them.
If I could help him, I would. I’d felt so alone for so long that if I could keep someone else from feeling that way I would. They loved each other, but sometimes you needed a friend to talk to. A friend you could vent to who would understand. Kevin was too curious and too excited about us to have anyone else to fill that role.
I had to think about how to answer his question. And take a few seconds to psych myself up to talking about it. “I…I like being reminded that he’s in charge. It’s not just…like…it’s not just in the bedroom. It’s bigger than that for us.”
I wasn’t sure if it made sense. I tried but it was more like I was tripping over the words than talking in real sentences. Kevin didn’t seem to mind though, because he nodded.
“I can understand that. How long have you guys been in this kind of lifestyle?”
This was one that I knew I could handle. “We’ve known each other for a while but only got together at the beginning of the summer. I’d been hiding what I needed out of a relationship from him and pushing him into the friend box. He found out and things went from there.”
“That’s cool. So he got it right away? No freaking out or thinking it was too much?” Kevin asked the question cautiously; it was another one of those moments with him that I knew there was more to his question than I was understanding.
“Basically. He heard me talking and knew I was hiding something, so he looked stuff up online to try to figure out what it was. He had a list of a few things he’d seen that didn’t do it for him but overall, he was great. I got lucky.” Was that enough of an answer? “We talked a lot and he did more research, but he was understanding.”
Kevin was looking out the side window now, trying to appear casual. It wasn’t working. “That’s awesome. I’m glad he didn’t freak. So he’s o
pen-minded then?”
There was that phrase again. What were they into? “I think so. I think we both try not to judge just because someone likes something different or because a couple loves a different way. It’s not our business what people are into, basically. I think we could be friends with someone even if we didn’t quite understand what they were into.”
“What kind of stuff would you guys not understand?”
That was a harder question. I was getting a little taste of what Mad must have gone through when I was grilling him. Deciding how to answer, I figured I’d start with easy things that I didn’t think would relate to their situation. “Something where people were being mean to each other. Not non-consensual, because that’s obvious, but hurting each other emotionally. I can’t think of that many. Even if we didn’t get it, as long as it wasn’t something that we had to constantly see I think we could ignore it. Like if someone were into a fetish that had them wearing costumes all the time it might be hard. Can’t ignore the guy in the big squirrel outfit.”
That made Kevin laugh. “Very true.”
Pulling into the dorm parking lot, I had to congratulate myself. I’d been so functional. Turning to Kevin, I gave myself one last push. “You know if you ever need to talk about something, I’m here.”
“No more panic attacks or fainting?” He smiled teasingly.
“I make no promises. I didn’t say I would be conscious; I said I would be here. There’s a big difference.” Laughing together, we climbed out of the car and headed for the building.
“So is there anything I need to be prepared for? Like, is your roommate going to go postal or something?” He looked like he was trying to tease, but I could see he wanted to know if he needed to be prepared for crazy.
“No, it should be fine. There were some issues of privacy and rumors, basically. He’s not that bad and isn’t the type to start a fight or something.” If anything, Jay was going to be hurt that I’d left. Now that I had some space from what happened, it was easier to see that he hadn’t been sure what to do. That didn’t mean I wasn’t pissed or wanted to keep living with the guy, though.