And just like that, my world collapsed into rubble. For the second time, she’d left me.
Chapter 19
Charlie
I stood in front of the Formica counter and listened to the storm outside. Thunder rolling, lightning blinding me with its vibrant white light and the rush of pattering rain on the roof.
“Miss?” The woman in her navy blue airport uniform stood waiting for a response. “Do you need help?”
“I – uh, are any of the planes flying out tonight? With the storm I mean?” I raked fingers through my hair and gripped my bag in one hand. I’d packed just the necessities to beat a hasty escape without the baggage. Now, the emotional baggage, that shit would hound me for years. Melissa had offered to pack up the rest of my stuff and ship it once I got in touch with her.
“The planes don’t take off if there’s a risk of wind shear or an electrical storm, but a little bit of rain shouldn’t stop them,” the woman said helpfully. Her name tag read Linda, and she had kind eyes. Deep, brown and soulful. I wanted to curl up in the fetal position and get lost in them. “Would you like to purchase a ticket for this evening?”
“I think so,” I said and took out my wallet. I didn’t have much in my bank account, just what I’d been saving in my emergency fund. I couldn’t think of a more glaring emergency than this.
“Where would you like to go?” Linda’s fingers hovered above the keyboard, her eyes trained on my face. Answers. Everyone wanted answers, and I still didn’t know. I just wanted to run.
Dad told me I wasn’t a quitter, that I couldn’t escape my problems, but terror had taken a hold of my heart. I’d been hurt by Nolan, and I couldn’t trust him. I couldn’t trust anyone. Not even myself.
“Where can I go? I mean, which flight takes off first?” I opened my wallet and slipped my card onto the counter. The lights overhead gave me a steaming headache, and I massaged my temples. “I need to be out of New York as quickly as possible.” My lips said the words, but my heart screamed that it was a mistake.
Don’t do it, Charlie. You can’t run from these feelings. They’ll follow you even if you land halfway across the world.
My conscience sounded a lot like my dad.
Linda typed with her long red fingernails. As they ticked the keys, she looked up at me. “Our first flight out leaves in fifty minutes for Honolulu.”
“Hawaii,” I said then snorted a laugh. A little lei. A little Pina Colada. I locked eyes with Linda. “Yeah, why not.”
She picked up my card.
You need to talk to him, Charlie. You need to find out the truth before you make this decision. You’re in pain. You’re not thinking straight. What if Diamond Head decides to roar back out of dormancy and covers you in molten hot lava and ash before you’ve even talked to him?
“Wait,” I said and slapped my hand on top of the empathic woman’s. Linda snatched her fingers back and blinked a couple of times in confusion. “I, ugh, I’m sorry, Linda. There’s something I need to sort out before I can leave. I’ll be back later, okay?” I picked up the card and slipped it back into my wallet.
“All right, but the fastest flight out might not be Hawaii later on. You could end up in Fargo.” Linda replied and tapped the side of her nose. “You betcha that won’t be as tropical as the main island.”
“I’ll have to take that chance,” I said as I chuckled and waved before turning my back to retreat. I hurried through the airport, past crowds of tourists and folks buying plastic Statue of Liberty’s and t-shirts emblazoned with I heart NY. I’d talk to him in person and sort out my confusion once and for all.
But what if Nolan didn’t have a valid reason for what he’d done? Could I handle that truth? I chewed the inside of my cheek until I tasted the metal of blood.
Minutes later, I dragged my bag – thankfully it had wheels at the base that spun in every direction – out of the exit doors of the airport and walked straight into the rain. Fat drops splattered the top of my head. I raised my face to the weather and welcomed the sting of the pelting water. It made me feel alive.
I closed my eyes to the splutter and hurried along the side of the road, raising my hand to shield my eyes from the driving rain. Thunder rolled overhead again, and I was having a hard time spotting an open taxi. This was crazy. I should’ve just called a cab from inside the airport, rather than running out here like–
I slammed into a solid muscle of man and stumbled back.
“Sorry,” I yelped and looked up at him. The breath whooshed from my lungs.
Nolan stood in front of me, sopping wet, his shirt sticking to his chest and abs. His suit jacket hung loose on either side of it.
“Charlie,” he said, his voice barely audible above the driving wind. Splatters of wetness permeated every inch of his skin, and his hair hung like a halo around his forehead.
I shivered against the chilly wind and soaking wetness. “What are you doing here?” I could barely hear my own raised voice, so I coupled it with some frantic hand gestures.
“I had to come. Melissa said you were leaving. Probably home to Atlanta. Is that where you’re going?” he asked in that charming tone. The one that could move mountains. And hearts. Except this time, it held a hint of vulnerability.
I stepped backwards, and he moved toward me again. I was in his sights now. I didn’t have time to gather myself, to create a rebuttal or a speech. It was the two of us, wet in the rain, with a valley of emotion separating us.
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“Did you forget something?” he asked, blinking water and glancing towards the front of the airport.
The shock of seeing him had worn off, replaced by pain. Such searing fucking agony I could barely breathe. This man who’d loved my body and touched my soul. And then proceeded to drag me over the coals. Again and again.
“No. I didn’t,” I said and then turned and did what I seemed to do best. Run. In all my life of facing obstacles and overcoming them, it seemed I couldn’t do anything but flee like Cinderella minutes before midnight.
But I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t think when I looked at him, it was stupid to believe that I could. I needed to go. Far, far away. Think. Heal. Give myself time to sort through everything raging inside of me.
I might be too late for Hawaii, but I could go somewhere else. The world was my oyster. I probably wouldn’t be able to afford rent for an apartment, but at least I’d be alone.
And safe.
“Charlie, stop,” Nolan called out. “Don’t walk away from me. Please.”
I froze in my tracks and spun to face him. “Why shouldn’t I walk away from you, Nolan Banks? You leave nothing but pain and shattered hearts in your wake.”
“Because you haven’t given me a chance to explain.”
I jabbed my index finger towards him. “I’m not sure it’s deserved. Chances are earned, not demanded.”
Chapter 20
Nolan
“Stop being a lawyer for five seconds and listen to me,” I yelled at her. “This isn’t court so there’s no need to argue your case. I’m not on trial here.”
But I was. On trial with myself and I’d already rendered the guilty verdict.
She stared at me, hair flat against her forehead and neck, sopping from the rain. Shit, she’d catch her death of cold in this; we needed to go inside. In spite of the drowned rat look, Charlene de Monaco had never looked more beautiful.
“Come with me to the car,” I pleaded as I held out a wrinkled and blue hand to Charlie, begging her with my eyes. Take the damn hand, woman. It’s a lifeline. “Let’s talk about this.”
Charlie didn’t move to close the gap between us. She didn’t move closer to me; she didn’t drop her bag. She was so distant, her eyes peppered me with icicles and fear curled around my heart, squeezing and constricting the blood flow. What if she ran after all? What if my words meant nothing to her, and she left me anyway?
“Charlie, I love you.”
“You don’t get to
say that to me,” she replied, shaking her head. Water flew from her long hair and streamed down her cheeks. I couldn’t tell whether it was from the rain or her crying. “You never get to say that again. I won’t be manipulated by you this time, Nolan Banks.”
“I didn’t manipulate you, and I didn’t lie about my feelings.”
“Why should I believe anything you have to say?” she screamed. Cars drove past, bright lights hazed by the spattering rain. Their wheels sluiced water onto the sidewalk. “You headhunted me for your bed like I was a common hooker.”
“It wasn’t like that,” I said, gulping for air and getting rain instead. “I didn’t pick you out of a line of headshots and decide I wanted to fuck you.”
“Oh yeah? Then explain it to me. How and when did you decide that I was the one you wanted to hire into the legal department at Banks for The Grant Project?” She stepped forward a few paces, closer than we’d been this entire time. “And why?”
“My dad’s company wanted to give something back to graduates, so he partnered with a few other large businesses to set up the scholarship fund. For lawyers only.”
“Yeah, I get that part,” she said, hands on her curvy hips and head tilted to the side.
“Right. Yeah,” I said and ran my fingers through my sopping wet hair. I shoved them in my pockets to keep from reaching for her. “He asked me to listen in on a couple of those interview tapes. You remember that day, don’t you? You gave this impassioned speech about helping others.”
“Social entrepreneurship,” she replied. “I remember.”
I nodded once. “My dad couldn’t attend, so I went instead, except I was late.” Typical of me, of course. Late to an important event because I’d been screwing some chick in the back of the limo. Making her scream my name and then not even remembering hers when I dropped her off at the curb in front of her walk-up.
I’d felt sleazy afterwards, disgusted with myself. And then I’d walked in on Charlie’s speech and it had been like my dark soul had flooded with light. For the first time in my life, I felt like I could be a part of something. Like I could be a part of her.
“You were amazing. Jesus, Charlie, you were so passionate. You spoke with conviction, and I knew in that moment I had to meet you. To see if it translated into real life from the cold, flatness of the videotape.” I bowed my head to hide my embarrassment. “Maybe that’s crazy, but that’s who I am. I saw you, and I wanted to know who you were. As a person and as a woman. Never as a lawyer. But it was more than that.”
She was quiet for a couple moments, just staring at me with those gorgeous eyes, lips slightly parted. “How? How was it different? How was it more?”
“I went home, and I couldn’t get you out of my mind. I researched you, I watched your progress once you’d gotten the scholarship, and then I reached out to a local headhunter and I made sure she hired you for Banks Realty. I would have done anything. Paid anything.”
“That’s creepy, Nolan,” she said, her eyes narrowed, raindrops moistening her lush eyelashes.
“I know. I became obsessed with you. Your light shone like a beacon, and I couldn’t think straight. And fuck it, even though I knew it was wrong, I stalked the hell out of you.” Man, she’d definitely run now. She’d probably think I was a serious psycho stalker. “Because every time I saw you, I felt something. Something other than numb and dead.”
Charlie didn’t run away this time, even after my deepest, darkest confession. She stared at me, waiting for more of an explanation. Giving me a chance I didn’t deserve.
“Then you arrived in the office, and I tried to stay away. I tried to reason with myself. Shit, I even called myself crazy for wanting you, for pulling you toward me. But I couldn’t stay away.” I choked up for a second, pounding my fist into my palm. For the first time in my life since Reese Littleton had hit me in the arm with a baseball bat in the third grade, shattering my wrist, I cried. Rivulets of tears mixed with the raindrops. “I still can’t stay away.”
“Why?” she whispered. I couldn’t hear the melodic tones of her velvety voice, but I could read her lips. She stood still. Immobile.
Was there hope?
“Because I’ve loved you since the moment I saw you,” I screamed, ignoring the honk of a passing taxi as he sprayed dirty rainwater on my leather lace-ups. “And not because I wanted to fuck you or pick your brain for Banks Realty. Because of your soul.”
She shook her head and sobbed, shoulders shaking. I couldn’t wait one second longer. I reached out my hands and placed them on either side of her neck, tipping her head back to lock eyes with mine. She needed to see my sincerity.
“Charlie, you shine. You don’t even realize how brightly. Like the fucking northern lights in Svalbard. You’ve been through so much shit in your life, and you’ve clawed your way to the top in spite of everything. Can you blame me for wanting to be a part of that?”
“I don’t know what to say,” she said, trembling now, not only her shoulders but her entire, beautiful body.
“Do you blame me for wanting to cling to you? Shit, that’s the wrong way to phrase it.” The rain had let up slightly. It was a drizzle now instead of a downpour, and the thunder had faded to background drum rolls. “You’re a rocket, Charlie. You’re waiting to launch into the stratosphere, and the only thing that’s holding you back is self-doubt.”
She stumbled towards me, and I dropped my arms so I could wrap them around her and plastered her wet forehead with kisses.
“I love you,” I whispered fiercely. “I loved you before I knew who you truly were, and now that I know you, I love you even more. Please, give me a chance to prove it.”
She looked up at me, raindrops dripping from the tip of her nose. “Okay.”
I pressed my lips against hers, and we melted into each other as I’d dreamed from the start. My heart opened. It soared. Everything was out in the open now. All the secrets and fears.
Our first true kiss. And Charlie smiled. This smile was so open and real, so filled with relief and pleasure that I felt it had been created only for me. This woman I loved had never looked this way for anyone else and she never would again. I drank the expression in, holding it inside my heart and soul.
Finally, I broke away from her and dropped to my knees, soaking my pants in a puddle as I held her hands. I looked up at her. “Be mine, now and always.”
“Nolan?”
“Marry me,” I said, trying to make her understand everything I felt for her in the words. “For real this time.”
For a brief yet powerful moment, one word flashed through my mind.
Forever.
Chapter 21
Charlie
I ended up in Hawaii after all. The irony of that was too strong to ignore, but instead of hating every second in the sun, I basked in it, standing beneath the shade of the hotel veranda, staring at the distant arch on the beach.
“You look gorgeous, sweet girl,” Dad drawled, stepping up beside me. He offered his arm, and I drew in a deep breath.
My plain white dress flowed around my ankles. I’d picked an obscure designer, Josie McDermott. A woman who’d been homeless until five short years ago and raised by her single mother. I’d felt a kinship with her when I’d seen her story on Entertainment Tonight. She’d gotten a shot during New York Fashion Week, and I’d solidified it by having her design my wedding gown. It was important to me to pay it forward. I didn’t need Vera Wang, I needed a meaningful moment with the man I loved on our wedding day.
The string quartet started the music, a haunting melody of love and loss, and my stomach clenched tight. Okay, maybe I was a little nervous for this moment but only because I’d never expected to reach it.
This wasn’t fake. The engagement ring on my finger was elegant and less ostentatious than the canary original. A perfect representation of our love. The emotion in my heart overflowed at the thought of Nolan.
“It’s time, love.” Dad stroked my forearm. “You’ll always be my daughter,
you know that right? You’ll always be my girl. I’m so proud of you, Charlie. From where you’ve been to where you’ve now arrived. It’s nothing short of a miracle.”
“And you’ll always be my favorite guy,” I replied. “No matter what.”
He tugged my arm to start me down the aisle, but I held him back for a moment. Nolan and I had agreed that this was the perfect moment to tell him the truth.
“Honey, you can’t be late to your own wedding. I’m sure the groom is itching to marry you. And who could blame him? I’ve never seen a woman as beautiful as you are today. Except, maybe, your mother.”
“He can wait a second longer,” I said and grabbed both my dad’s hands. I looked into his eyes, making sure I had his focus. “Dad, Nolan and I have done a lot of talking about you lately.”
“Uh oh,” Frank said and pulled a goofy dad face. “Am I in trouble?”
“I know you don’t take handouts, but we want you closer to us. Closer to home. We’ve bought you an apartment in Manhattan. It’s close to our place, within walking distance actually. You’ll be able to retire or take up a hobby. Start a new business, even. Intern at Banks Realty. Anything you want.” If I knew my dad, he wouldn’t settle for sitting around at home all day. He’d want to get out there and do something with his life.
“You’re kidding,” Dad said. “Charlie, don’t you kid around with me like this.”
“Dad, I’m totally not kidding. I need you close by, and Nolan wants to get to know you better. Will you agree to this? It would make us both so happy.”
Dad welled up and cleared his throat, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down in an effort to dismiss the emotion. “Of course. I’d be honored. Thank you. But I’ll pay you back. It’s just a loan, okay? You know Frank de Monaco doesn’t accept handouts.”
I nodded as we embraced and then finally turned to face the arch. “Now, I’m ready.”
Dad guided me down the aisle at a slow pace, and I gazed ahead to lock eyes with Nolan. He stood beneath the arch, overflowing with lavender orchids, beaming from ear to ear. He wore a beige linen suit and looked like… well, looked like only Nolan Banks could. Dreamy. I drank him in, mentally sketching a portrait of him this way so I would always have it with me.
Bait: Alpha Billionaire Romance Boxed Set Page 25
