Shaking his head, Sam laughed lightly and then went outside to get what was left of Sara’s birthday cake. Returning, he said, “Well, one thing for sure, we have plenty of dessert.”
“Mmm...yummy,” Amanda replied. “I love cake.”
“Sweets for the sweets, right?”
At that precise moment, Sam looked up and his gaze locked with Amanda’s. An instant heat rushed to her face as she remembered the way he’d held her in his strong arms only minutes before. The problem was, she had a feeling he was remembering, too. Then, just as quickly, that same heat began to spread slowly down the rest of her body.
Needing to break the spell, she quickly glanced away and said, “Where are the girls?”
“Probably in the living room watching TV.”
“Need any help with supper?”
“Nope,” he replied.
Amanda cleared her throat. “Well, okay, then. What do you say I go and see what the girls are up to?”
“That’s a good idea. In fact, tell them to pick up the toys I’m almost positive they have scattered all over the den.”
No sooner had Amanda turned to go to the living room, than the girls came running into the kitchen. “We’re hungry, Daddy,” Caroline said.
“I’ll have supper ready in a jiffy. In the meantime, make sure you’ve picked up all of your toys in the den.”
Both little girls hung their heads.
Amanda saw the girls’ reaction. Standing a safe distance behind Sam, she decided to lighten the moment by giving Sara and Caroline a look that said, Ain’t your father a stick-in-the-mud? She didn’t mean anything by it. It was almost a spontaneous reaction. But Caroline and Sara started laughing.
Obviously dumbstruck by their reactions, Sam just stared at his kids. Finally, though, he must have gotten the hint that something was going on behind his back, and he glanced over his shoulder at Amanda. “What are you doing?” he asked.
“Who me?” Amanda replied, all innocentlike. This time the girls giggled even harder.
“Yes, you,” he said with a grin, turning suddenly and grabbing hold of Amanda. He sat in a kitchen chair and pulled her into his lap.
“I didn’t do anything,” she said, taken by surprise.
“Oh, yeah,” he replied, laughing. “Well, let me show you what I do to sneaky females who make funny faces behind my back.” Then he began tickling her—mercilessly—and she squealed with laughter.
It was torture to be tickled that way.
And yet, it was wonderful.
She gasped for air.
He tickled her across her ribs, over her abdomen and all the way up to the base of her throat Sam had such strong fingers, and they danced across her skin in a firm, yet gentle way. He was giving her more pleasure—and pain—than she could stand.
“Stop—stop,” she gasped. “Girls—someone—help me.”
Caroline laughed. But, apparently, Sara took Amanda’s pleas to heart. “Daddy, stop,” she cried out. “You’re hurting Amanda.”
Sam finally let go of Amanda, and she jumped to her feet and began straightening her clothing.
“Sara, honey,” Sam said, “I wasn’t hurting Amanda. We were just playing.”
“That’s right,” Amanda said breathlessly. She was glad the child’s confusion had put a stop to Sam’s strange behavior. She couldn’t have taken much more of it. But at the same time, she couldn’t let Sara think that Sam was actually hurting her. Because he wasn’t. She just had to get control of herself first. Her heart was pounding like mad. Her legs were trembling like a newborn colt’s. In fact, she felt all discombobulated. She could just imagine what her hair looked like.
“See, Sara, honey,” Sam said, smiling at his youngest daughter. “It was all playlike.” Turning to Amanda, he said, “You’re all right, aren’t you?”
Amanda was still breathless. “Yes, of course,” she replied, quickly trying to comb her hair back from her face.
With one final glance at Amanda, Sam turned and got busy with supper preparations. Amanda followed Sara and Caroline to the den and helped them pick up their scattered toys.
For the first time in years, Amanda’s emotional guards were on shaky ground. If she wasn’t careful—which, of course, she was trying to be—she was going to find herself with one big heartache on her hands. A heartache, she now feared, that was in the making. Already Caroline and Sara had become very special to her, and she had something very basic in common with them. She, too, had had to grow up without a mother. But even though the girls had been through a lot in their young lives, they were sweet and innocent and expected absolutely nothing from her. Every moment with them was precious to her.
And then, of course, there was Sam. And, she supposed, he was her biggest problem of all. Since her ex-fiancé’s rejection, she had never allowed a man to get close enough to her to crack the steel plate of armor she had erected around herself. But Sam hadn’t asked her permission to get close. He had simply found a weakness in her armor and barged right in like the seasoned soldier he was.
Once Amanda and the girls were finished picking up toys in the den, they returned to the kitchen to find Sam in the middle of preparing supper. They pitched in to help him by setting the table. Finally, they were all seated at the table, and the meal turned out to be relaxed and fun. Amanda found it amazing how eating hot dogs could bring out the kid in a person—including herself.
The girls finished and Sam excused them from the table. “How about one more?” he said, giving her a daring grin.
“I’m stuffed,” Amanda replied. “I couldn’t possibly.”
“Ah, come on. Just one more. It’s only a hot dog.”
Amanda laughed. Surprisingly, she really was enjoying herself.
Suddenly, Sam grew quiet and instinctively Amanda did, too. Then, he reached across the table with his napkin in hand and gently wiped one corner of her mouth. “You...uh...had a dab of mustard,” he said, gazing into her eyes.
“Oh,” Amanda replied, mesmerized by the intensity of his gaze and by the sweet way he had handled what could have been an embarrassing moment for her.
It was outrageous the way one look from this one particular man could make her feel all breathless inside. Trying to ignore her racing heart, Amanda scooted her chair back from the table. “Well, it’s getting late. I should be going. Thanks for supper.”
“Just my luck,” Sam said with a snap of his fingers, “that you should decide to leave just when I was going to ask a favor of you.”
“Oh? What kind of favor?”
Sam grinned. “Well,” he said. “I was going to ask you to supervise the girls’ bath while I cleaned up in the kitchen. They need supervision, otherwise they flood the bathroom floor.”
“Me?” Amanda said.
“Yeah,” he replied. “Why not?”
“I’ve never done anything like that before.”
“Well, don’t you think it’s time you did? In fact, you seem to enjoy my kids so much, I have to ask again why you don’t have any of your own?”
Amanda wasn’t in the least bit prepared for that question, and it shook her right down to the tips of her toes. If he knew the real reason why she didn’t have children, what would he think of her as a woman? “I had to make a choice a long time ago. I chose a career.”
Liar. Fate had made that decision for her.
In fact, right at this moment she wanted kids so bad the ache was palpable. But she would never tell Sam the truth. He would only look at her with pity—or disgust. In either case, she knew she couldn’t handle it.
“I’ll stay long enough to supervise the girls’ bath,” she said, hoping to change the subject. After all, it was the least she could do after having stayed for supper. But then—no doubt about it—she would have to go. If she was going to salvage any part of her heart, she simply had to.
“I’ll make us some coffee for afterward.”
This was her moment, Amanda thought. Just say no.
She took
a deep breath. “Not tonight,” she replied.
“Just one cup,” he said, grinning at her.
Amanda hesitated for a moment. She felt as though she were being pulled apart. One half of her wanted to stay; the other half wanted to go. “Maybe just one,” she finally said.
His grin widened. “Yeah, just one,” he replied.
As soon as Amanda left the kitchen, Sam paused a moment to try to figure out what he was doing. He had vowed on his wife’s grave that he would take care of their children, that nothing else in his life would ever take precedence over them. Not his job as a navy SEABEE—which was why he had retired—and especially not another woman.
And, heaven knew, he was the last man on earth who would be looking for a stepmother for his kids. He had grown up under the critical eye of a scheming stepmother who’d always managed to make him and his brother look bad to their father. And even though Amanda didn’t seem that kind of person, there was no way he was ever going to take the chance of having that happen to his girls. They deserved better.
Whatever it was he wanted from Amanda Lucas, he knew one thing for sure—it was nothing permanent.
Chapter Six
Caroline and Sara were delighted when Amanda told them that she was going to supervise their bath. Giggling, they led the way down the hall and into the bathroom.
“Remember, no splashing,” Sam yelled out from the kitchen.
Smiling, Amanda closed the bathroom door then turned to face the girls. “Okay,” she said, “let’s get started. I’ll get the water going while the two of you undress.”
The girls shimmied out of their clothes in no time at all. The tub was just beginning to fill up.
“Can we get in?” Sara asked.
Amanda nodded.
“Our hair,” Caroline said suddenly. “Daddy always pins it up so it won’t get wet.”
The idea that Sam took the time to pin up his daughters’ hair before they bathed set a warm feeling spiraling through Amanda.
“He uses those,” Caroline continued, pointing to a small basket on a shelf above the tub. Reaching for it, Amanda saw it was filled with ribbons and hair clips of all sorts and colors. She could only gaze at them and wonder about the man who cared enough to place them there. Finally, though, she realized that Sara was talking to her.
“It’s my turn to go first,” she said. “Daddy says we have to take turns. Caroline was first last night to get her hair pinned up. See,” she continued, pointing to the wall. “We have a chart.”
Following the child’s line of vision, Amanda saw a handwritten sheet of paper taped to the wall. Once again, a warm, gut-wrenching feeling sliced its way through her. This should have been her life. Only, it wasn’t. How unfair. She would have done her very best to be a good wife and mother. “Okay, then,” she said gently. “Come here, Sara, and let me pin your hair up.”
It took Amanda only a few moments to get both girls’ hair pinned up. By that time, the tub was half-filled.
“Can we get in?” Caroline asked.
“Sure can,” Amanda replied. “Just be careful.” She ended up helping Sara climb over the rim.
“Can we put bubble bath in the water?” Caroline asked.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Amanda replied. She glanced up at the shelf above the tub and saw a pink-and-white box that was plainly marked by the manufacturer as Bubble Bath. For just a fraction of a second, she thought to go and ask Sam if it was all right to use it, but then decided that she was supervising this bath and the decision was up to her.
“Okay,” she said, reaching for the box. Opening it, she poured a small amount of granules in the palm of her hand. After smelling the strawberry fragrance, she dumped them in the tub.
“Put more than that,” Caroline said. “Daddy says our water is hard.”
“He does, does he?” Amanda said, grinning at the child.
“Uh-huh,” Caroline replied.
Widening her grin, Amanda said, “Okay, then. Here goes.” This time, she poured a generous amount of soap granules near the open faucet. Within seconds, thick layers of bubbles began to form. The girls grabbed handfuls and began blowing them into the air. Enjoying the moment, Amanda did, too. The three of them were laughing and having the best time when all of a sudden Amanda realized that the bubbles in the tub had risen more than she’d planned.
“Oh, my goodness,” she said, suddenly jumping to her feet and reaching for the faucet that was now somewhere below the bubble line. Finally, she found it and quickly turned it off. But the tub was so full of water that bubbles had begun to ooze over the rim.
The girls were still giggling and blowing bubbles from the palms of their hands. They had bubbles in their hair. In fact, there were bubbles just about everywhere.
Oh-oh, Amanda thought. They were in trouble.
There was a knock at the door. A moment later, Sam opened it and stepped inside. For a second he just stood still, staring at the sight of them. Finally, though, he glanced down at Amanda. “What in the world’s going on in here?”
“I—uh...I haven’t the slightest idea what you mean. You asked me to supervise the girls’ bath, and so I’m in the process of doing so.”
“You call this supervising?” he asked, gazing around the bathroom as though in awe.
“It’s really not that bad. It’s just bubbles,” she said, defending herself—and the girls, too.
“We’re having fun, Daddy,” Sara piped in with a giggle. “Can Amanda be our new mommy?”
Suddenly, the bubbles were the least of Amanda’s problems.
Of all the questions for Sara to have asked. Immediately, she felt her insides lock up. If only the innocent child knew how much she wanted to be someone’s mother.
“You have a mommy,” Sam replied.
“Yeah, but she’s in heaven and can’t play with us anymore.”
For one brief moment, Sam’s eyes met Amanda’s. She knew that Sara’s question had shaken him. Of all the women in the world, undoubtedly she was the last person he would have considered being fun. She didn’t even think he particularly liked her. He tolerated her because of his girls, which was just fine with her. The strange part was, the more she was around him, the more she found she admired him, both as a father and as a man. And in his own way, he was beginning to be kind of fun, too—even if at times he acted like an old fuddy-duddy.
Like now.
Sam stepped forward and knelt down at the side of the tub. “I know you miss your mommy,” he said to Sara in a soothing voice. “I’m trying very hard to do the things for you that she used to do. But if I’ve forgotten something, all you need to do is tell me.”
Suddenly, Amanda felt uncomfortable. As if she were an outsider, intruding on a private conversation. She stood and cleared her throat. “Maybe I should be going now.”
“Oh, no,” Sara cried out, her big eyes suddenly filling with tears. “Don’t go.” She glanced at her father. “Daddy, pwease, make Amanda stay.”
“Look,” Sam said. “You don’t have to go. The girls want you to stay. Besides, I’ve already made coffee.”
Amanda gazed at him for a long moment She wanted to stay with this family more than she’d ever wanted anything. “Are you sure?”
“Positive,” he replied.
Amanda took a deep, steadying breath. “Okay, I’ll stay,” she said. Dropping back down to her knees, she picked up a washcloth and soap. “Girls, I guess we need to finish what we started.”
“I can help,” Sam said. “I’ve finished in the kitchen.”
For the next few minutes Sam and Amanda worked side by side getting Caroline and Sara bathed and then ready for bed. From time to time their elbows would bump together, sending tiny shock waves of emotion through Amanda’s body. Never in her wildest imaginings had she ever pictured herself in a perfect family setting as this one. She reveled in the moment, and yet, she knew it would be over soon.
“Okay, girls,” Sam said. “It’s time for bed.”
Soon after Caroline and Sara were tucked in their beds for the night, Sam turned out the light in their room.
“Good night, girls,” he said, standing in the doorway. Amanda was right behind him, trying desperately to keep her emotional guards from collapsing. After hugging the girls good-night, her feelings were swelled up in her throat like a giant tidal wave.
“Good night, Daddy,” they replied. “Good night, Amanda.”
A piercing pain struck Amanda’s heart. Just how much bittersweet joy was she supposed to handle in one, single night? The truth was, this should have been her life, period. Permanently. And it wasn’t fair that it wasn’t. “Good night, Caroline—Sara,” she finally said, trying hard to keep her voice steady. The last thing she wanted was to alarm them by starting to cry. Besides, she was tougher than that—wasn’t she? “Take care of your puppy. What’s her name again?” she asked with a teasing smile.
“Sugar,” they replied in unison.
“Then take care of Sugar.”
“We will,” they replied.
Sam shut their bedroom door, and immediately Amanda turned and marched down the hall toward the front door. Somehow she knew she had to get out of the house—fast—otherwise, she was going to get swallowed up in that tidal wave of hers.
“Wait a minute, Amanda. What about the coffee?” Sam said, following at her heels.
“It’s getting too late for me to stay,” she said, making up any excuse she could while not missing a step on her way out. Suddenly, though, she felt as if she were running for her life. As if she had to get out of there, or else. And, indeed, it was the or else that had her moving toward the door like a roadrunner.
Just as she entered the living room, she stepped on something round—a toy, perhaps—that rolled forward a couple of inches and threw her off balance. She tripped over some other contraption on the floor, and before she knew what was happening, she was sprawled, belly-down, across the armrests of a big, brown leather recliner. Needless to say, the wind was knocked out of her. And her shoes... She had no idea where they were. One thing for sure, they weren’t on her feet.
What a spectacle she must have made.
The Daddy And The Baby Doctor Page 8
