by Crymsyn Hart
“Where did they come from?”
The god grinned mischievously. “I happen to know the grocer.”
He put the tray down. Before she could protest, he hoisted her up, and flung her over his shoulder. With his other hand he grabbed the tray again. She started beating his back with her fists while he carried her into the bedroom.
“Oh help! Please, help me! Someone is trying to kidnap me,” she yelled weakly.
Lugh said nothing. He was about to drop her onto the bed. A tickle started in her nose. She tried to hold it. It was no use. She sneezed. In that moment, her whole apartment trembled like a mini-quake had hit it. The bed lifted off the ground a foot. The sudden movement of furniture and the levitating bed threw the god off balance. He stumbled. The strawberries scattered all over the carpet. Kalliope was pitched headfirst onto the covers slamming her forehead hard enough to see stars. These were not the good kind he normally made her see.
“Are you okay?” asked Lugh.
She rubbed her head, noticing the bed was still floating and her carpet was strewn with strawberries. However, the other furniture was not. A wave of pleasure overtook her. Instead of answering Lugh, she forced his lips to hers. He tried to pull away. The more she kissed him, the more her lust grew. Her condition was getting worse. Sweat broke out on her body. She yearned for Lugh to be deep inside of her again. Nothing else mattered. One hand let go of his chin and trailed down to his hard member. She began to stroke it. Lugh forgot about his question and kissed her back. The pain in Kalliope’s head faded to a dull ache. Her body craved to be touched. It hungered for an orgasm. Lugh slid inside of her slick depths. All she needed was a couple of strokes and she would be sated.
“Ahem.”
Kalliope thought she heard something. She ignored it. She was so close. Lugh’s tongue circled her nipples. His fingers fondled her flesh lightly from her rear up along her torso. The friction between them was building. Her muscles were tensing. The sudden heat that had risen was almost as intense as Lugh’s power, but this was something else. It was wanton, primal. Oh God, just one more stroke.
“Can’t you guys get a room? Icck!”
Lugh stopped kissing Kalliope. She was lost in her daze. After a moment realizing nothing was happening, she opened her eyes and sneezed. The bed crashed to the floor, causing their unexpected visitor to jump back. Lugh fell on top of her.
“We had a room until you interrupted us. What do you want?” Kalliope asked. Anger tore through her. This was not the best time for them to have an uninvited guest.
Lugh got off of her and handed her a sheet. Kalliope stared at her ex-roommate. He had dirt brown skin, matted dark green hair and a long, pencil thin nose with three warts on the end of it. The goblin’s eyes were almond shaped and vibrant electric blue. He had sharp pointed teeth and long, thin fingers matching his nose. For years, she thought he was a poltergeist the way he rearranged her pots and pans until Lugh had allowed Kalliope to see him.
“Ickleberry, what are you doing here?” She wrapped the sheet around her. She was shivering and feeling feverish. I really gotta be coming down with something. The floating furniture and the gratuitous behavior must be a side effect. I’ve never had this happen before. I’ve gotten hot and bothered over men, but nothing like this. I keep thinking of Lugh being an entrée. Come to momma. Screw the goblin; I need me a man—No. This is worse than the need for chocolate. I’ll have to ask Morgaine about it the next time I see her. Maybe it’s a common symptom in magickal beings.
None of the beings she knew ever got sick. Even her ex-goddess turned human roommate, Flidais, hadn’t gotten a cold. Dagda had banished Flidais because the goddess had originally given Kalliope the apples that made her magickal. In order for her to rejoin the gods, she needed to eat five Oak Apples. Lugh had now given the ex-goddess three of the five apples she needed. In her heart, Kalliope figured Dagda loved Flidais and wanted her back. However, pride and supreme law of the gods made him follow protocol.
The goblin hopped up on the bureau to scrutinize himself in the mirror. He licked his hand before smoothing it over his dark green hair. “Dagda wants to see you.”
“Go back and tell Dagda I’m busy.” Lugh turned to Kalliope and kissed the exposed skin of her shoulder.
She started to relax and drift away in Lugh’s embrace as if she were in a warm bubble bath. Calgon, take me away!
“Excuse me.”
She opened her eyes while picturing horrible things being inflicted on the goblin. Instead of seeing him chopped into little pieces, he floated and started laughing hysterically. He rolled around on his back in mid-air while holding one of the lost strawberries.
“Kalli,” Lugh’s voice broke her concentration. The goblin tumbled to the ground. Several of the fruits cushioned his fall with a squish.
“What?” she grumbled.
“Magick doesn’t work that way. It can, but you have to have an evil heart. You, love, don’t have one to kill or hurt anyone. Even Ickleberry. I know how you feel, though. I was just getting started.”
She sighed. It was obvious Ickleberry was not going anywhere. “What do you want? I suggest you tell me before I get the heart to kill you.”
“Wouldn’t be the first time…”
“What did you say?” the witch asked.
“Nothing.” The goblin picked a few seeds from his teeth. “Look, I wouldn’t have come here at all, but Dagda thought it would be a good idea for you to see a familiar face. I’m doing him a favor. I was getting bored at my new pad since the tenants are gone. I’m getting hungry. Do you have any Chinese food in that magick fridge of yours? These berries are too sour for my taste. Hey, Lugh, can you whip me up some Peking Duck?”
“Ickleberry. Enough. Focus. Please. I’ll take you to China so you can dumpster dive if you want. What does my grandfather want?” Lugh asked.
The goblin crossed his arms over his chest. “He wants the witch. Says it’s time for her to make good on her promise.”
Kalliope looked between the two of them. A feeling of dread washed over her. Before it set, she sneezed. This time the whole apartment shook. The bed jumped almost to the ceiling. “Oh boy!”
Chapter Two
“Kalli, love. Are you okay?” The bed slammed to the floor.
She wiped her hand across her nose. The god handed her a tissue. “I think I’m getting sick.”
“I figured that. Why don’t you lie down, and I’ll get you some chicken soup.” Lugh started to tuck her in, but Kalliope was overtaken by another bought of lust. She pulled him down on top of her. He didn’t seem to mind when she kissed him deeply. His hands began to wander underneath the sheet.
“Humans are so annoying. Universe to Lugh! Dagda wants her now! I won’t have his wrath on me!”
The god gave the goblin a dirty look. “Obviously, she is not herself. I don’t think it’s a good idea for her to go.”
“Lugh, I have to,” Kalliope protested.
“No. You don’t.”
“Yes, I do. I’ll be fine. Promise.” She pushed him off her and stood up on wobbly feet. Dizziness overtook her. Whatever the illness was, it was hitting her fast. Her body burned with fever. She even found herself eying Ickleberry.
Ewww! But it has possibilities. No, that is disgusting! What am I thinking! Thinking about the goblin, in a sexual way was not appealing. Kalliope would do what she needed for Dagda and then come back and convalesce with Lugh many, many, many times!
“I’m taking a shower first. Who knows how long I’ll be gone.”
The goblin protested. The grin on Lugh’s face got bigger by the second. “Lugh, sweetie. I’m going this one alone. Can you be a dear and clean up the strawberries please?” Lugh’s expression reminded her of a crushed child who found out ice cream was gone forever. She turned to Ickleberry. “You. Deal with it!”
Kalliope hurried out of the bedroom and into the bathroom. There she found some out of date cold medicine, but it was better than nothing. Hopefully,
it would fight her unusual symptoms. She turned the water on and jumped into the stream. Once she lathered her hair, she sneezed. The water separated around her and the shower curtain fell down. She sniffled, not caring that the water was going everywhere. If she didn’t go, Dagda would come get her. After seven months, he finally wanted her to make good on the deal she had struck.
After getting the soap from her eyes, she wrapped her hair in a towel and looked at the mess in her bathroom. Water had pooled on the floor. Her shower curtain was half in the toilet. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. In her mind, she pictured the bathroom the way it was: clean, dry, and perfect. She held the image in her mind. Power built up inside of her. It felt like she would sneeze again. The energy shot down her right hand. Once the energy departed, she opened her eyes and was amazed.
It had worked. The floor was perfectly dry. The toilet seat was back down and shower rod free. Even the curtain hung back in place, but it was not the one she had started with. Replacing the nice, black, thick plastic one was a clear plastic curtain. Adorning the curtain were green dancing frogs with red umbrellas.
You’ve got to be kidding! Whoever is up there, you’ve got to be kidding! Kalliope had an aversion to frogs. She wasn’t afraid of them. She just didn’t like them. Even Kermit the Frog gave her the willies. The curtain was the exact one she had sacrificed when she had called 911 on Lugh the night he first appeared naked in her bed.
Magick was fickle. Now it was playing a practical joke on her. Kalliope closed her eyes again, envisioning her black curtain. The power built and left her. She heard the rustling of the shower hooks against the metal rod. When she opened her eyes, the shower curtain was still there, but the frogs were doing something different. Their umbrellas were over their opposite shoulders and their free hands were—
They can’t be, she thought. She stepped closer and rubbed her eyes. I’ll be damned. The frogs were flipping her off.
“Ribbit.”
She pulled the curtain back and peered in the tub. Inside was a green bullfrog the size of a small dog holding a red umbrella in its fingers. Kalliope shut her eyes, thinking she was hallucinating. When she opened them again, she was peering into the bulging eyes of the largest frog she had ever seen.
“Hey toots. How they hanging?” The frog leaped onto the edge of the tub and sized her up. She felt dirty from his once over.
“What’s the matta? Don’t ya like what ya see? Come here, babe, and give me some suga’ on these luscious lips o’mine.”
Kalliope turned and hightailed it out of the bathroom. The magickally conjured frog could wait. She could fix it, or ask Morgaine to help her fix it later. Right now she had to get to Dagda because the god was not going to wait for her. She just ho—
“A-aa-achho!” All her living room furniture jumped about a foot. Maybe the cold medicine was kicking it. She hoped so.
“Bless ya!” she heard the echo from the bathroom.
She didn’t answer, but returned to her bedroom to find Lugh flipping absently through the television channels. Ickleberry rifled through her sock draw. As requested there was no evidence of the strawberries on her carpet.
“I don’t have any odd ones. Your brother is on his own.”
The goblin smiled at her innocently. He tucked something into his pants. She bet it was a pair of her blue socks. It had better not be her favorite pair. “You ready?”
She pulled on some jeans and was about to put on a t-shirt when she saw Ickleberry shaking his head out of the corner of her eye.
“What?”
“I think Ickleberry is trying to say what you’re wearing is not presentable to stand in the presence of a god.”
Her eyes narrowed. She tried to be mad at Lugh, but couldn’t. But she did muster a little annoyance. “I wear this with you and you don’t complain.”
Lugh smiled. “I never grumble about what you do and do not wear. Since this is official business, I think this would be more appealing.”
Lugh snapped his fingers before she could protest. In a blink, Kalliope was attired in a deep green dress. The neckline plunged to the top of her breasts leaving her arms bare. The material fell in folds to her knees. Her feet were adorned with soft sandals with laces wrapping around her calves. On her right arm were the three snake bracelets Morgaine had given to her. Her hair was pulled away from her face and fell in ringlets around her shoulders. A fine silver chain with a crimson stone hung around her neck. When her fingers moved over the stone’s smooth surface, it was warm and pulsated.
“Do you like it?” asked Lugh while he fingered the stone.
Kalliope smiled and entwined her fingers with his. “It’s beautiful. What kind of stone is it?”
“It’s not a stone. It’s a piece of my heart.” Lugh studied her reflection. Gone was the fun loving god she was used to. His eyes gazed intently into hers. Kalliope realized he was telling the truth. She turned in his embrace.
“You mean that?”
“Oh yes. You’re always with me, Kalli. I want you to know that I’m always with you no matter where I am.” He leaned in and kissed her.
“What do you mean?” she asked him when they broke the kiss.
“I’m concerned about what Dagda wants from you. Sometimes his requests are nothing more than getting him some obscure coffee made in Antarctica. Or it could be worse. I want you to know I’ll always be there to protect you even if I can’t be. If you need to, place your hand over the stone and think of me. The power will be there.”
“All this lovey feely crap is about to make me barf. Are you ready?” Ickleberry asked.
Kalliope sniffled and rechecked herself in the mirror once more. “You made me look like a Greek goddess.”
“Greek, Roman, whatever. You’re always a goddess in my eyes. Besides, I was hoping, when you get back, we could go to Mount Olympus. I want you to meet Apollo. He’d love you. You remember all the fun we had the last time we were there. You were wonderful. If I remember, you took to it like a wild nymph.”
His hand caressed her breast through the thin material. Her nipple hardened. A small flush of lust moved through her. Her body pressed against his perfectly. Yup, the cold medicine was kicking in because she did not feel compelled to throw him down on the bed, and lather him with whip cream which she would clean up very slowly with her tongue. She kissed him quickly and reluctantly pulled away.
“Hey toots. You ain’t leavin’ without me are ya?”
She turned to the doorway. The bullfrog had gotten rid of the umbrella and waited for her expectantly.
“What is that?” asked Lugh.
“I’ll tell you later.”
The frog hopped in her way. “What are ya waitin’ for? Let’s go.”
She shrugged, picked up the amphibian, and held him under her arm. She tried to repress a shiver.
“Oh, babe, a frog could get used ta this!”
Lugh peered down at the frog. “Don’t get any ideas! Understand!”
“Ribbit.”
Kalliope shivered from touching the bullfrog and followed the goblin into her closet.
Chapter Three
Once she stepped over the threshold, a gust of warm air and the aroma of flowers greeted her. It was a smell she remembered from being imprisoned in the Oak Tree months ago. Once she got used to the light, she put the heavy frog down and looked around. The wall she stepped through was already re-carving another scene instead of her bedroom. The magickally self-playing harp plucked Back in the Saddle Again by Aerosmith. The harp had a sense of humor. She had hoped Dagda would forget about the deal she had struck with him. It was pointless because Flidais ended up a mortal anyway. Now whatever Dagda wanted her to do, she would. No questions asked. Well, maybe a few.
Kalliope looked up at the chandelier overhead. Vines had woven together with lily trumpets acting for the lights. Fairies, with their long, squirrel-tales, swung from the vines. The throne was made from wood. The head of a stag with a large rack of antlers adorned
the top of it. The King Stag. That was what Dagda was. And with that thought, he appeared in the throne. His hair was dark brown with red and gold leaves woven into it. His beard was short and shot through with green moss. He was tan, sculpted, shirtless, and dressed in dark red leather pants. When she had first met him, he was turning cartwheels and bouncing off the walls because he was coming down off a caffeine high. Now he seemed more composed.
“It’s about time, Ickleberry. I sent you to get her hours ago.”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t pull her away from Lugh. They seemed to be joined at the hip. But here she is.”
“I can see that. Thank you.” He dismissed the goblin. With a pop, Ickleberry disappeared back to wherever he was haunting now. Kalliope was glad the goblin wasn’t waking her up at six in the morning with the banging of rearranging her pots and pans.
“You rang.” She felt a sneeze coming on, but the instinct was suppressed. Thank God for that. She didn’t want anything levitating in front of Dagda. He stood silently, sizing her up. He ran a finger along her cheek. Before Kalliope had eaten the magick apples, she would have melted in a puddle at his touch. Now she hardly blinked.
“Sorry, Dagda. Not gonna work.”
“Damn! A man can try, can’t he?” He grinned and then threw his arms around her, giving her a crushing, bear hug. She could barely breathe from the force of his grip.
The god backed off with an obvious pout. This was the god she knew. The one who was slightly child-like but definitely a hunk in his own right. Kalliope looked him in the eyes, not daring to examine anything below the waist that demanded her attention from the bulge in his pants. Her face flushed red when she let her eyes drift.
“Oh, Kalli, things have been so dull these past months without you here. And you brought me a present too. Goodie!” He clapped his hands together and picked up the frog. “I haven’t had frog legs in forever.”
