They came up to Emerald. “Prince Dolin, this is Princess Emerald,” Tartan said, formally introducing them to each other. “And we are faced with irony: each of you needs to marry, but it seems you are not for each other.”
They shared details, and agreed. The two continued to talk as the group walked the path.
When they came to a fork, Dolin chose the one that bore south. Then one that bore west.
The Prince turned out to be an unassuming, decent chap. Tartan liked him, and knew that Tara liked him better. Even Emerald found him acceptable, maybe because he accepted her as she was and made no moves on her.
A castle came into view. “Oh, my,” Tara said. “That’s Caprice. In a new location. Not the maid.”
“The maid?” Emerald asked.
“We’re supposed to get in touch with a maid named Amara, whom we should encounter along the way,” Tara said.
“Caprice?” Dolin asked.
“Do what we do,” Tartan said. “Consult internally with your host for background information.”
Dolin paused. Then his face lighted. “The castle that travels!”
“That’s it,” Tartan said. “We came from there yesterday, when it was elsewhere. This is either a remarkable coincidence, or your talent wants you to meet Princess Dawn.”
“I do not know why. My host tells me she’s married, with children.”
“She is,” Tara said. Then a bulb flash over her head. “Her talent! She knows all about any living thing she touches.”
“She might know about me,” Dolin said.
“Are you allowed to know about yourself, yet?” Tartan asked.
“I do not know. But I assume that if I learn about myself during our travels, this is acceptable, or my talent would not allow it.”
They went to the door and knocked. The door opened. There stood Dawn. “What are you doing here?” she asked. “I thought you were on your mission.”
“We are,” Tartan said. “Princess Dawn, this is Prince Dolin, and Emerald Dragon. He does not know his personal history, and she can’t marry a prince. We thought you might help.”
“I’ll be glad to,” she said. “May I touch you, Princess?”
Emerald put out her hand, and Dawn touched it. “So you see,” Emerald said.
“I do indeed. Your mission is vital. I know King Ivy is eager to find an avenue for peace between our species. But this is beyond my expertise. I have no advice to offer you.”
If there had been any doubt of her nature, there was none now. Dawn knew.
Then Dawn extended her hand to the prince. He took it.
Dawn looked astonished. Then she stepped into Dolin and hugged him closely. Then she kissed him. “I love you,” she said, and fainted.
Fortunately he caught her before she hit the ground, and the four of them steadied her in place. “Should I have paused at a pool to wash myself?” Dolin asked, bewildered.
“You smell great,” Tara said. “It must be something she learned about you.”
Dawn recovered. “Oh, this is amazing,” she said.
“Please, Princess, what is it?” Dolin asked. “I did not mean to offend you.”
“Oh, you could never do that, Prince,” Dawn said. “I just wasn’t prepared.”
“So what is it?” Tartan asked.
“I can’t tell you.”
The three of them stared at her. “You know, but you can’t tell?” Tara asked.
“Exactly. There’s a geis.”
Oh, that again. “So what’s next?” Tartan asked.
“I think you should go to Hades.”
“I did give offense!” Dolin said ruefully.
Dawn laughed. “Not at all, Prince. Go there to see my sister Eve. She’s the mistress of Hades. I know she will want to meet you. I’ll mirror her and tell her you’re coming. Just follow that path.” She indicated a glowing path that Tartan was sure had not been there before.
That quickly they were on their way to Hades. “This may not be completely pleasant,” Ted said.
“I could turn dragon if there is danger,” Emerald said. “But I prefer not to, because it ruins my clothes unless I take them off first, and I don’t like going nude when there are men present. They can get ideas.”
“Understandable,” Dolin said, and she flashed him a smile.
Tartan noticed that this path was paved. Each tile was printed with the words GOOD INTENTIONS.
Surprisingly quickly they passed a sign saying HADES—TOURISTS UNWELCOME.
“Fortunately we’re not exactly tourists,” Tara said.
Now the forest gave way to a bleak landscape where obscene shapes danced. Before long the shapes realized that someone was coming in, and formed into two luscious women and two handsome men, each of them beckoning seductively.
“Don’t step off the path!” Ted warned.
“But suppose one of them is a princess?” Dolin asked plaintively.
Immediately crowns sprouted on the heads of the females.
“Monica says not to believe anything the spooks say,” Tara said. “They just want to get us off the safety path so they can consume us.”
“My host says much the same,” Dolin said.
“Monica says it’s too bad we don’t have safety pins,” Tara said.
“What are those?” Dolin asked.
“She said they are magic pins you can take with you that will keep you safe as long as you keep them. Even in hell.”
Tartan laughed. “I would have guessed another use for them, such as to hold up diapers. But what do I know? I’m hopelessly Mundane.”
“Are you sure I shouldn’t turn dragon?” Emerald asked.
“Don’t,” Tartan said, speaking for Ted. “You wouldn’t fit on the path, and the spooks would get at you in human or dragon form. That would be hell, literally.”
“It would,” Emerald agreed.
But the spooks had overheard. Now a handsome woman appeared, beckoning to Emerald, along with a lovely female dragon.
They ignored the spooks, much to the spooks’ frustration. The females even yanked up their skirts to flash their panties, but the men kept their gazes strictly on the path. Even so, the peripheral images were like fires.
The path led to a somber castle. As they came to the main door, it opened. There stood a beautiful dark-haired princess. “Tartan. Tara, Prince Dolin, Princess Emerald,” Princess Eve said. “Do come in. It’s so nice to have human or similar company.”
The castle interior was much nicer than the exterior. Soon they met a seven-year-old boy with a modest young woman. “This is my son Plato,” Eve said proudly. “And his governess, Zosi Zombie.”
“Zombie?” Tartan asked, taken aback. “I must say you don’t look dead.”
“Not at the moment,” Zosi said. “I am alive at present, but my normal state is as a zombie.”
“Yeah, she’s great,” Plato said. “Sometimes we visit the zombies. They’re real yucky, with bits of rotten flesh falling off.”
“Zosi’s perfect for him,” Eve said. “If he misbehaves too much, she kisses him. He hates that.”
Plato made a face, agreeing.
“I’m a dragon,” Emerald said.
Plato eyed her. “You look just like a woman,” he said disapprovingly.
Emerald reached toward him with one hand. The hand shifted and became a dragon’s claw. “I’m not.”
“Wow! Let’s go flying!”
“Plato, these folk did not come to play with you,” Eve said sternly.
“Come on, Plato,” Zosi said. “These folk have private business with your mother.”
“I know,” the boy retorted. “That’s why I’m staying.”
Zosi pursed her lips in kiss formation. The boy quickly changed his mind, and they departed. The others managed to
avoid smiling, at least while the boy was in sight.
Eve contemplated Dolin seriously. “Dawn wouldn’t tell me exactly what she knows, except that I would be interested. But I have my own source of information, as she knows. I know all about any inanimate thing I touch. Do you have any associated object?”
Dolin held out his hand with the ring on one finger. “This is my essence.”
“Excellent. Let me touch it.”
She touched it. She straightened up. “Oh, my!” Then she stepped into him and hugged him, as her sister had, and kissed him. “I love you!” Fortunately she didn’t faint. Quite.
“Please, what is it?” Dolin asked.
“Oh, I can’t tell you. There’s a geis.”
The four shared a subdued groan, along with their hosts.
“I’m sorry,” Eve said. “I didn’t mean to tease you. I was caught off guard despite Dawn’s warning. But it’s true I can’t tell you. You need to find a princess to marry first, or at least to find out for yourself.”
“I am hoping to find one.” He paused, considering. “Are there princesses in Hades?”
“A number,” Eve agreed. “But they’re dead. You need a live one.”
“We should be on our way,” Tara said.
“Oh, stay the night. It is late, and I’m delighted to have company. You’re safe as long as you stay in the castle.”
“It’s more complicated,” Tartan said. “Tara and I have to return to Mundania to, er, recharge. We’re just ghosts here.”
“Oh, of course. Dawn mentioned that too. But your hosts can stay, and Dolin and Emerald. Oops.”
“Oops?” Tara inquired nervously.
“I just remembered we only have two vacant suites. Ted and Monica can share one, of course, but it may be awkward for the prince and princess.”
Dolin and Emerald exchanged a cautious glance. “I appreciate the problem,” Dolin said.
“We can be friends,” Emerald said. “We just don’t want to have a romantic relationship or to marry.”
“Honesty compels me,” Dolin said. “I must say the right thing. Your human form is most attractive. I would have thoughts if I saw more of it than is proper.”
She was evidently intrigued. “Even though you know my true nature? That my attraction is to females, not males? That I am not remotely human, apart from my appearance?”
“I understand that you were in tears when the Mundanes met you, because of your bad alternatives. That suggests that you have human feelings.”
“That’s right,” she said, surprised. “The human form must bring human sentiments. They must be necessary, because if I married a human, I would have to play the role to make the marriage work.”
“That seems likely,” he agreed. “You wish to do the right thing by your partner. That makes you appealing in another way. I do not wish to cause you distress, but thoughts are already threatening to reach me.”
“That’s sweet. I suppose I could pretend you are female, in the dark.”
“Please no. It is better that I not see or feel you in dishabille.”
“You really are trying to do the right thing.”
“It is my nature.”
“Suppose I turn dragon?”
He laughed. “That would do it. Just promise not to consume me.”
She smiled. “I promise.”
“I will avert my gaze when you strip so as to change without spoiling your clothing. Just let me know when.”
“I will,” Emerald agreed thoughtfully.
“Then it seems it is settled,” Eve said, relieved.
“We will rejoin you here in the morning,” Tartan said. “I’m sure you’ll find Ted and Monica perfectly compatible.”
Tartan and Tara took hands and turned ghost, zipping back to their natural bodies. Again they had to scramble for the bathroom, having forgotten to take a midday break. Then, relieved, they came together and kissed. “Do you still find me interesting,” he asked, “after seeing Prince Dolin?”
“As interesting as you still find me, after seeing Monica, Dawn, Dara, Emerald, and Eve.”
“Touché!” Then they plunged into another vibrant ellipsis. There was no doubt they found each other interesting.
. . .
“You know, Dolin and Emerald do seem to like each other,” Tara said as they ate dinner. “Just not as romantic partners.”
“Yes. It’s too bad, because they could do each other a lot of good.”
“A marriage of convenience. Maybe if they don’t find what they want, that would suffice. It would be better than suffering failure and possible extinction.”
“If they only see it that way,” Tartan said.
“We don’t seem to be any closer to accomplishing our own mission.”
“Tomorrow is another day.”
“You know,” she confessed as they turned in together, “I wouldn’t much mind if the mission took a long time. Fabulous fantasy days, and nights like this.”
“I agree. For the first time my life has meaning. Day and night.”
“Day and night,” she agreed, and kissed him.
Chapter 6
Amara
In the morning they prepared themselves and made the change back to their Xanth hosts. Ted and Monica were ready. “Now to rejoin Prince Dolin and Princess Emerald,” Tartan said.
They knocked on the door of the adjacent suite. The prince opened it, rubbing his eyes. “I may have overslept,” he said apologetically. “There were so many things to learn yesterday, I was more tired than I realized. So was my host.”
Behind him was curled a beautiful sleeping dragon, pure silver with emerald green edging on her scales, her wings embracing her body like a cloak. “Emerald must have been tired too,” Tara said.
“Yes. We talked last night before she changed. She does not have much experience associating with humans, and it may have been a strain on her. She’s a nice person.”
“I hope she finds a suitable partner,” Tartan said. He was careful not to suggest that Dolin might be such a partner, if it came to the starkest choice. Half a loaf was surely better than none.
Dolin snapped his fingers. “Emerald, it is morning,” he said.
The dragon’s eyes snapped open. A burp of fire issued from her mouth. Suddenly she was the woman, naked, utterly shapely. Dolin put his arm up to shield his gaze, too late. He was suffering a thought. Not quite a freak. So, for that matter, was Tartan. And Ted. So she was a dragon. Who cared?
“Oh for pity’s sake,” Tara snapped, and Monica’s endorsement was in her tone.
“Oh, I forgot,” Emerald said, chastened. “I should have waited for you to close your eyes. Did I freak you out?”
“No,” Dolin said through his arm. “Please dress.”
Now Tartan turned away as Emerald picked up her panties, knowing those would wipe him out. In barely (as it were) a moment and a half she was done. “I’m decent.”
The men were relieved. So, evidently, were Tara and Monica. It seemed the women weren’t eager to have the men feast their eyes on either bareness or panties.
“You were never indecent,” Dolin said gallantly.
She flashed him an appreciative smile. It was evident that despite their formidable differences, the two were coming to like each other.
Princess Eve appeared. “We have breakfast awaiting you downstairs,” she said. “Did you sleep well?”
“Almost too well,” Tartan said with a quarter of a smile.
In due course they were on the path out of Hades. “We’re lucky,” Ted said. “Regular visitors have to be ferried across the River Styx, and sometimes the boatman makes moves on the ladies. But this path bypasses that.”
“I wonder how the ferryman would feel about a lady dragon?” Tara mused, and the others smiled.
The demons along the sides tried again to tempt them. Now they even assumed the forms of dragons, changing to luscious bare girls. “Oh cut it out!” Emerald snapped. “You’re not lesbians.”
The spooks actually seemed taken aback. They didn’t know how to handle this. They faded out. The foursome moved on, sharing a smug smile.
They emerged in Xanth proper. “Now where were we going?” Tara asked.
“Eve mentioned Castle Roogna,” Dolin said. “It seems there’s someone I should meet there.”
“Not Amara?” Tartan asked.
“We won’t find her, she’ll find us,” Tara reminded him.
“No, this is one Princess Electra, Dawn and Eve’s mother,” Dolin said. “The name almost seems familiar.”
“She had an interesting history,” Ted said.
“Tell us,” Tartan said, and turned the mouth over to him.
Ted talked as they walked, guided by Dolin’s choices of the right paths. “Electra was an ordinary girl, nigh nine hundred years ago, helping the Sorceress Tapis, who made magic tapestries.”
“How long ago?” Emerald asked.
“In historical times,” Ted explained. “I said it was interesting.”
“There’s one of the tapestries hanging in Castle Roogna now,” Monica said, also speaking for herself. “It shows whatever is happening in Xanth, past and present. The Sorceress Tapis had a marvelous talent.”
“Tapis needed the Heaven Cent,” Ted continued. “That’s a whole ’nother story. Electra’s talent was electricity, so she was there to help Tapis get the Cent charged. At that time a princess, actually Tapis’ daughter, came to ask Tapis to make a coverlet for her, so she would not get cold during her long sleep.”
“Which is another whole story,” Monica said. “She was supposed to sleep a thousand years, then be awoken by a handsome prince who would marry her and they’d live happily ever after.”
“Meanwhile the Magician Murphy was skulking around,” Ted said. “His talent was to make anything go wrong that could go wrong. Tapis didn’t like him. She even sent him a tapestry that opened on Hades. That made him cautious. But his curse affected them, and it was Electra who bit the poisoned apple and fell into the casket, taken by the sleep spell. The poor princess was left out. I understand she was most annoyed.”
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