I shifted on the stool. “I took it off …during. Now things are…back to normal.”
She looked worried. “So that’s it, then. This thing with Redford was just a fling?”
“Right. It was always just sex between me and Redford. This was…my last hurrah before settling down.”
“So he goes back to Kentucky—”
“And I stay in NewYork, where I belong,” I finished.
Footsteps sounded in the mudroom, ending our conversation. Redford stuck his head in the kitchen. “Sorry, I knocked.”
I busied myself drinking from my cup. Mine and Redford’s conversation this morning had been brief and stilted. Worse, I could barely look at him without wanting to go at it again. I was pathetic.
“We don’t stand on ceremony here, Redford,” Kenzie said. “Come on in. Coffee?”
He wore his hat and coat, and his cheeks were red from the cold. “Sounds good.” He glanced at me, his expression unreadable. “I started the truck to warm it up. Looks like the roads will be fine for the drive back.”
“Good.” I had called my office from the clinic and told them I wouldn’t be in today.
Kenzie handed Redford a cup of coffee and he thanked her. “Sam’s truck is gone. Has he left for the day?”
Kenzie nodded. “He asked me to give you his regrets. He got a call about an expectant cow mom in distress on a farm across the county.” She grinned. “I figure if I get as big as a cow with this baby, he’ll feel right at home.”
“Are you feeling better this morning?” I asked, standing.
“Much.”
“Are you coming back to the city this week?”
She sighed. “I hope so. I have to admit, I’m getting cabin fever on this mountain, especially since it’s too cold to go outside. I miss the city. And you girls.”
I gave her a hug. “Call me when you get back and we’ll have lunch.”
“You bet,” she said. “Redford, it was a pleasure meeting you.”
He nodded and thanked her for the hospitality. “Good luck with the baby.” He smiled. “And with the foal.”
She followed us to the door. “Good luck to you guys tomorrow on the audit.”
I closed my eyes briefly—one more thing to dread.
The drive back to the city was, shall I say, loooooong. If we exchanged ten words, it was a lot. We listened to music and I plowed through the rest of the tax documents. But even though we didn’t talk, Redford’s body communicated with mine, sending out vibes that kept my senses on edge. Scenes from the previous night kept flashing into my mind. By the time we began to see signs for the city limits, I was almost frantic to be away from him.
“I left some cash in the apartment to cover the damages,” he said suddenly.
“Oh…that was good of you.”
“How’s your foot?”
It throbbed. “It’s okay, just a little sore.”
He rolled his shoulders. “I’m sore all over.”
I averted my gaze to my hands…and my ring.
He made a rueful noise in his throat. “I have the distinct feeling that you have regrets about last night.”
I exhaled slowly and looked out the window. “Don’t we all have regrets about things in our lives?”
“Absolutely. Vegas, for instance.”
My chest tightened. “Right. Vegas.” At least we agreed on one thing.
I was never so happy to see my apartment building. Redford pulled in to a rare empty parking space in front, then reached across the seat and picked up my hand. The gesture was unexpected, and sent my pulse spiking.
He rubbed his fingers across my palm. “Denise, I’m sorry about last night.” He glanced up with a wry smile. “I feel like I’m always saying I’m sorry.”
I swallowed hard. “Redford, you don’t have to apologize. You gave me a choice, and I made my decision. I went to you with my eyes wide open.” I just hadn’t realized my heart had been ajar, too.
He looked thoughtful and kept stroking my palm, sending little shivers up my arm. “It wasn’t fair of me to put you in that position.” He turned my hand over and fingered my engagement ring. “I know you feel guilty about what we did. I feel as if I’ve stormed through your life…again…and messed up your plans.”
I didn’t say anything, especially since I could barely speak when he touched me like that. He was trying to apologize for last night, and heaven help me, all I could think about was him kissing me again.
And suddenly, he was kissing me. First tenderly, then hungrily. We devoured each other, our tongues parlaying, our lips sliding, our teeth clicking. He hauled me across the seat into his lap and I ran my hands over his chest, his arms, drove my fingers into his hair.
“We could do it right here,” he murmured raggedly, unbuttoning the top button of my blouse.
A memory chord vibrated…the very words I’d said to Barry, tempting him to do something naughty…
But when Redford stroked my nipple, I was willing to do anything he asked.
I loved him, I realized with a burst of adrenaline. I loved this man.
I returned his kiss like a starved woman, our hands roving, hunting for buttons, snaps.
A sharp rap on the window startled me—and Redford. My first thought was that it was the police and we were about to be booked for public indecency. But when I saw the astonished face of the person on the sidewalk, my stomach bottomed out.
“Mom?” I whispered.
“Mom?” Redford said, his voice panicked. “That woman is your mother?”
“And that man is my father,” I murmured, utterly and completely horrified to see them staring in at us. Although, in fairness, they looked equally horrified. I slid off Redford’s lap, straightening my clothes, gasping for air. “Omigod, omigod, omigod. Redford, when I get out, just drive away.”
He frowned. “I’m not going to drive away like some teenage kid. I’m going to introduce myself to your father.”
I was starting to hyperventilate. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“We’ve done a lot of things this weekend that weren’t particularly bright. Come on.”
There was no time to calm myself. I opened the truck door and climbed down, my heart jumping in my chest at the sight of my parents standing there, the epitome of upper-middle-classdom in their prim winter resort wear, surrounded by suitcases, looking shell-shocked.
“Mom…Dad…what a surprise.”
My mother drew herself up. “That’s obvious, dear.”
“We tried to call you,” my dad piped up, “but you weren’t answering your cell phone, or your phone at work. We thought we’d take our chances and see if you were home.”
“I th-thought you were in England.”
“The weather was miserable, so we decided to cut our trip short and stop here on our way home to congratulate you—” her eyes cut to Redford suspiciously “—on your engagement.”
I wanted to evaporate. After a few seconds of gluey silence, I cleared my throat. “Um, Gayle and Harrison Cooke, this is Redford DeMoss.”
Redford removed his hat and shook their hands. “How do you do, ma’am, sir?”
“And how do you know our Denise?” my mother asked sharply.
Oh…my…God.
Redford turned to me, his mouth slack with surprise. “Ma’am, I’ll let Denise explain it.” Then he put his hat back on his head. “After I leave you folks to enjoy your reunion.”
Without being asked, he picked up the suitcases and carried them to the landing, then came back and tipped his hat. “Ma’am…sir…Denise.” He looked at me, his eyes hard. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning?”
The audit…of course. “I…I’ll meet you there.”
He nodded curtly, then climbed into his truck and drove away. My heart caved in when I saw him glance in the rearview mirror, then look away. Watching him leave was jarring to my senses. But I would have to get used to it.
I turned and gave my folks the best smile I could manage
under the circumstances. “We need to talk.”
My mother gave me a disapproving look. “I believe so.”
I couldn’t even bring myself to look at my poor dad—no doubt to his great relief. As we entered my apartment, I experienced age regression. By the time we had deposited their suitcases in a corner of the living room, I felt about twelve years old. The day of reckoning had arrived—the day my parents discovered that little Denise, squeaky-clean honor student who never caused them a day of trouble, wasn’t perfect after all. Not even close. I thought I might be sick.
We had barely removed our coats before my mother crossed her arms and demanded, “Denise, who was that man you were kissing on the street?”
I turned to look at them and sighed. “please sit down.”
They sat on my couch and looked at me expectantly. I took a deep breath and on the exhale said, “Redford and I were…married.”
My mother clutched her chest. “What? When?”
“Three years ago.”
She shrieked and grabbed my father’s arm. “You’re married, and you didn’t even tell us?”
“No,” I said, holding up my hand. “We were married. For six weeks. I had the marriage annulled.”
My father looked completely lost. “Is that legal?”
“Yes. It means our marriage never happened.”
He lifted his hands. “Who is this man and how did you meet him?”
Another deep breath. “I was in Vegas for the holidays. He was a Marine, on leave from the Gulf. That’s where we met and…were married.”
“In Vegas?” My mother looked horrified. “Harrison, it’s our fault. That’s the year we went on the Bahamas golf trip with the Sutherlands. If we’d stayed home, Denise would have been with us and this would never have happened.” She teared up. “I didn’t want to go on that trip—it was your idea—and just look what happened!”
Dad handed her his handkerchief. I pinched the bridge of my nose.
“Oh, Denise,” she cried, “tell me the wedding at least took place in a church, not in one of those tacky chapels.”
I winced. “It was in a tacky chapel.” I cleared my throat—in for a penny, in for a pound. “Actually, in the drive-through.”
My mother looked faint. “Harrison, get my heart pills.”
My dad dutifully reached for Mom’s purse and rummaged through the various prescriptions before handing her a bottle.
“Did that man take advantage of you?” he demanded. His face turned red. “Were you…with child?”
This was going well.
“No, Dad, no. Redford was…is a complete gentleman.” I thought of the scene they’d witnessed outside and swallowed hard. “Ninety-nine percent of the time. We got married on the spur of the moment and when I came back to New York and he went back to the Gulf, we realized we’d made a mistake. That’s all.”
“That’s all?” my mother asked. “Denise, marriage isn’t something to take lightly.”
I balked. “I know that. I’m not proud of what I did, which is why I didn’t tell you.”
“I don’t understand,” my dad said. “If you had the marriage annulled, then what is that man doing here?”
“He had to come to New York because our joint tax return is being audited by the IRS. We have an interview in the morning.”
Now my dad looked truly horrified. “The IRS can ruin your life.”
My mother’s head bobbed. “Do you remember the McGoverns? Their 1040 form went astray and they lost their house. The IRS came and threw all their things out in the yard for anyone to take. Miriam lost her mother’s silver—she said the mailman took it.”
I rolled my eyes. “Mom, the IRS doesn’t take that kind of action simply because a 1040 form wasn’t filed. Besides, ours is just a routine audit.” I hoped.
“Where does this young man live?” my dad wanted to know.
“Kentucky. He’s retired from the Marines and works in his family stables.”
My mother frowned. “He’s a stable boy?”
“Um, no. They run a horse breeding business.”
She made a face. (My utterance of the word “breeding” was as close to a “sex talk” as my mother and I had ever gotten.)
“So when did you and Barry break up?” she asked.
I swallowed. “We didn’t.”
Her gaze flew to my finger and she gasped, temporarily diverted. “Your ring is gorgeous!” She reached for my hand and scrutinized the diamond. “Oh, my, it looks flawless.”
“It is.”
She glanced up, then her eyes narrowed. “Where is Barry?”
“In L.A.”
“So you’re kissing this Redmon fellow in the street while your fiancé is out of town?”
“His name is Redford.” And I was guilty of so much more than kissing.
“Your father and I raised you better than that, Denise.”
I squirmed. “I’m sorry you and Dad had to see that. It…just happened…and it was a mistake.”
She frowned. “Well, considering that ring on your finger, I hope it doesn’t happen again. Why aren’t you at work today?”
I didn’t have time to think of a lie. “I went with Redford to upstate New York yesterday to look at a stud horse, and the weather was too bad for us to return last night.”
My mother’s eyebrows shot up and I didn’t want to know what was going through her mind. A lump formed in my throat and I felt very, very dirty.
My dad stood abruptly. “Gayle, we’d better go. Denise has a lot on her mind right now. Honey, we’ll call you in a few days.”
He gathered their coats and suitcases and shepherded my mother toward the door. But at the last minute, she turned back and wagged her finger at me. “Denise, a wise person learns from their mistakes.”
*
KENZIE GASPED. “No, they didn’t.”
“Yes,” I said into the phone miserably. “They did.”
“Oh, my God, you were making out in his truck? In broad daylight?”
I closed my eyes. “Yes, but we weren’t naked…yet.” Thank goodness for small miracles.
“Well, what did you tell your parents?”
I sighed. “The truth.”
“What did they say?”
I teared up. “They were shocked. My mother said that they raised me better than that, and then they left.” I sniffed. “I can’t imagine what they think of me.”
Kenzie made a sympathetic noise. “They probably think that you’re human, and that everyone makes mistakes. Give them some time to come around. Besides, Denise, you’re an adult.”
I pressed my lips together. “Which means I can be deceitful or even immoral without being accountable?”
“Of course not. But you have to decide for yourself what’s right and what’s wrong for you. You’re the one who has to live with your mistakes.”
“But my mistakes affect other people’s lives, too.”
“So explain to your mom that this thing between you and Redford was just a blip. That you were having cold feet after Barry proposed.”
My throat ached from the lump that formed there. “Except I’m starting to think that it wasn’t a blip…for me.”
She gasped. “Are you in love with him again?”
“Maybe…yes.”
“And what are you going to do about it?”
“Nothing. Kenzie, Redford thanked me for filing for the annulment, said it had allowed us to get on with our lives.”
“So what about last night?”
I gave a little laugh. “Obviously, we’re still attracted to each other. But sex is the only thing Redford and I have in common.”
“It’s about the only thing that Sam and I had in common.”
“And look—” I stopped and bit my tongue.
“And look, what?” Kenzie asked lightly. “Look at how my life has changed?”
“Yes,” I said finally.
“Hmm, let’s see—before I met Sam I worked eighty hours a week and had no soci
al life. Now I get to do the job I enjoy at a sane pace, and I have a husband who loves me and his baby in my belly.” She sighed. “Denise, yes, my life has changed, and I couldn’t be happier. I’m not saying that the way I did it would work for everyone, but sometimes you have to be willing to take a risk…like you did in Vegas.”
I frowned. “But that was a disaster.”
“Only because you came back and allowed everyone to convince you that it was a crazy thing to do.”
“But it was a crazy thing to do.”
“So? Just because it was crazy, doesn’t mean it was a mistake.”
I was quiet, digesting her words. “I guess I need more order in my life than most people. As much as I care about Redford, I just feel so…reckless when I’m around him. I can’t live like that, Kenzie.”
She sighed. “Then it sounds as if you’ve made the right decision to write this off as a fling and go on with your life.”
I murmured my agreement, but I didn’t feel as good as I’d hoped to feel.
“So, where is Redford tonight?”
“At his hotel, I assume. The scene with my parents caught him off guard, but he handled it well. Shook my father’s hand and looked him in the eye before he left.”
“Hmm…not easy to do after you’ve been caught with your pants down.”
I sniffed. “Tell me.”
“So he left?”
“He said he wanted to give us privacy. Basically, he was giving me an out if I wanted to lie to my parents. Again.”
“Very chivalrous of him.”
“Yes.” Redford was nothing if not noble, which is why he would have stayed in a quickie Vegas marriage, even after he had realized his mistake. “Anyway, I’ll see him tomorrow at the audit, and that will be the end of it.”
Kenzie made a doubtful noise. “If you say so. Let me know how the audit goes.”
I hung up the phone, leaden with despair. I found the plane tickets to Vegas I had bought as a Valentine’s Day surprise for Barry and wavered. Maybe Barry and I simply didn’t have enough fun together. Maybe I wasn’t being fair. Then I stared at my laboratory-engineered-diamond engagement ring until my vision blurred. On top of everything else, the money already spent on our relationship was giving me an ulcer. And second thoughts.
With my heart pounding in my ears, I picked up the handset and dialed Barry’s cell phone.
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