“And there’s nothing wrong with that. It sounds like you’re apologizing for being you.”
You have no idea, he thought. She was an insightful woman.
Trevor finished his coffee and got up off the couch. “Sometimes,” he said softly.
Serenitee took the empty cup he offered and placed it on the coffee table. “You shouldn’t.”
He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans half afraid he might try to touch her. “I, uh—it’s getting late. I better get going.”
Serenitee didn’t know why she felt a heavy disappointment settle in her stomach, but she did. She nodded and walked him to the door.
Trevor felt like kicking himself for being ‘that jerk’ again. Against his better judgment, he bent down and kissed her cheek with a feather light touch. He heard her heart pick up speed.
Maybe that wasn’t such a good idea. When he looked into her eyes, he knew he was lost.
Dear God, help him. He bent down again, only this time pressing his lips to hers. The fire had ignited and he didn’t know how to stop it from engulfing them both.
This intensity he felt for her scared the living hell out of him. He wanted to be gentle but it wasn’t in his nature. And now, he couldn’t stop tasting her. He picked up on a hint of chocolate. His tongue felt the softness of her velvety mouth. She moaned against his mouth and it only flamed the predatory beast inside.
He somehow found the strength to lift his head. He needed to get a hold of himself.
Serenitee gave him a questioning look. “Is something wrong?”
He cupped her face in his hands. “I just don’t want to ever hurt you,” he said so softly and genuinely, Serenitee felt tears stinging the back of her eyes.
Serenitee lifted on her tip toes and kissed his scruffy chin. “I trust you.”
Trevor’s jaw clenched and his lower lip quivered slightly. “Please don’t.” His plea was strangled and tortured.
“Don’t trust you?” He nodded. “Why?”
He stepped away from her and opened the front door. “Forgive me, but I think it’s for the best that I go.”
Serenitee watched him walk away, confusion etching her face. She closed the door and went to clean up the kitchen before going to bed.
Chapter Four
Serenitee went to bed early but her curiosity got the better of her and she opened the Van Holden journal once again.
“’September 6, 1865:
“’With the war finally ending three months ago, I sincerely hope the United States finds some order and peace.
“’As for me, peace keeps eluding me. It only taunts me in my grief.’”
Serenitee read on. She felt like weeping so many tears for Trevor’s ancestors. Their torment was just so tangible to her. She could definitely relate to their pain.
Yes, they both suffered differently, but they still suffered. The tragic deaths in the Van Holden family; the tragic deaths of her parents. Both had lost the people they loved in ways that could numb a person forever.
She had made it all the way to Trevor’s great grandfather’s entry in 1912 when she couldn’t hold her eyes open any longer. She fell asleep with the journal on her belly.
Serenitee was jerked from sleep when she heard a piercing scream rent the night. She shot up, the journal hitting the floor.
She knew those terrible sounds were coming from Trevor. His cries of pure anguish pulled at her soul and ripped at her heart. What was so heart wrenching to Trevor that made him cry out in such a way? She wanted to go to him, but the way he always tried to distance himself made her hesitant. He wouldn’t appreciate her interference. So, what could she do but sit and listen to his screams split the air. She could swear they invaded her dreams. In these dreams, he’s running. To or from something, she couldn’t be sure. Sometimes, his intensity frightened her a bit. Not so much that she wouldn’t let him into her bed. It was that same intensity that her fantasies ignited beyond her control.
She didn’t think there was anything she could do about it. He was torturing himself over something. It must be bad. She still thought he was being too hard on himself.
Serenitee bent down to pick up the book and put in on her nightstand. She put her head back on her pillow and tried to go back to sleep.
Trevor stared at his calendar. One day until the full moon. He felt his insides coil tightly at the thought of what he had to do. It was time for another shot.
He went to the bathroom to prepare the needle and to grab the alcohol and cotton balls. After he had everything sterilized, he went to the garden and picked a couple of Acinitum.
Trevor finished mixing the Monkshood for his monthly injection. He washed his hands and then filled the small hypodermic needle to the correct dose of the liquid, wiped his hip with an alcohol soaked cotton ball and pushed the needle into his hip. The medicine stung a little under his skin.
Sometimes he wondered why he even bothered with this. He knew his body had been building a resistance to the Monkshood over time. The men in his family tree mentioned this in that blasted old journal he still hadn’t found.
They had all used different methods of calming the beast only to have the effects weaken over a certain period of time.
He didn’t know if increasing the dose would help. He knew Monkshood was deadly to humans around the forty milliliter range. He wasn’t quite that human so he might be able to get away with a higher dose. The side effects were pure hell to put up with, making him so sick to his stomach, he couldn’t eat all day. He could only lie in bed while his head swam and the room moved in circles.
It was only a once a month injection. He only needed two when the full moon happened to rise twice in one month. Thankfully, August was the only time it had happened this year. He was relieved to find that next year would not have but one full moon a month. And it wouldn’t happen for another three years.
Since tomorrow was a full moon, he had to inject the medicine today and ride out the nausea as best he could.
And try to avoid Serenitee at all costs.
Serenitee didn’t hear from Trevor for three days now. She just hoped he was okay. After hearing those heart twisting screams a few days ago, anyone would think otherwise. The fact that everything was so eerily quiet at his house scared her more than his screams. At least then she knew he was still breathing.
Serenitee had been working in the yards all day today. She might not have a green thumb but she knew how to handle a rake. A couple hours later, she had neat piles of brown and orange leaves and some fallen twigs. It wouldn’t be too long that she would have a lot more to do once all the trees lost their foliage.
She breathed in the clean scent of the coming autumn. A couple of more weeks, fall would be at her doorstep. That meant getting ready for Halloween, one of her favorite holidays. She couldn’t wait to buy pounds of candies to distribute to the trick-or-treaters.
Even with the cooling weather, Serenitee wiped a healthy dose of sweat from her face. As soon as she bagged these leaves, she was getting a long, cool shower and a big glass of homemade lemonade, courtesy of Rue. Bless the matronly woman. She had stopped by with a large pitcher, floating with thinly sliced lemons, earlier that day. They had sat on the porch swing, sipping at a frosty glass and making small talk. Until Rue brought up Trevor.
“How’s is goin’ with your new neighbor?”
Serenitee smiled. “He’s been a great help. There were some things that I needed done that I couldn’t do myself. He has strength enough to spare, I can tell you that.”
Rue sat silently, seeming to consider carefully her next words. “He’s been behaving himself, hmmm? That’s good.”
Serenitee was taken aback by her statement. “He’s been very nice to me. What makes you say that, Rue?”
Rue made a sympathetic noise. “Poor thing’s been through so much in his short life. I guess he deserves to feel some bitterness. His sorry mama left him without even a backwards glance. Lost his daddy when he was young. I think Craig was only fif
ty when he passed on. A real shame to lose someone so close.”
Serenitee set her glass down and faced Rue with a serious look. “Rue, what happened to his father? Was it a horrible death? Trevor hasn’t said much about him—actually he said nothing about him but the fact that he died very young.”
Rue clamped her mouth, looking as if she was thinking about how much she should actually tell her young friend.
“Well, sugar, Craig had some kind of illness. He would be fine for a while then it would hit him, torture him. His body had taken such a beatin’ over the years and it finally gave out. His death was somewhat of a painful one, sad to say. I hate to mention this to you since you and Trevor seem to be gettin’ along nicely.” She stopped, not sure she should go on.
Serenitee touched her shoulder. “Please, Rue. What is it?”
“This….illness…..has been passed down to all the men in the Van Holden family. I’m sorry but Trevor suffers from it, too. I don’t know any of the Van Holden men that didn’t have it.”
“Rue, you’ve lived here all your life, right?”
“Sure have.”
“Did you know Craig?”
Rue nodded. “I knew Craig’s father—Trevor’s grandfather---John, too.”
“They all died the same way?” Serenitee found that extremely odd.
“More or less.”
Curiosity was eating at Serenitee. “What is this illness?”
Rue patted her knee and stood up. “Can’t say for sure so I don’t say nothing. If you really want to know, you have to ask Trevor. It is his genes cursin’ him. He’ll know more about than I ever will. Or would probably want to know.”
Serenitee had a sneaking suspicion that Rue knew more than she was letting on. But she admired the woman for not saying anything she was unsure about.
“Well, duty calls. I have the supper shift. I’m the only one that can make the buttermilk biscuits the way customers want ‘em.” She gave Serenitee a motherly hug. “Come down to the café when you get a chance. I might be covered in flour but you’re welcome to sit with me when I get a break.”
Serenitee grinned. “I’ll do that. What’s on your special tomorrow?”
Rue gave her a hearty chuckle. “Good to see you enjoyin’ Southern cookin’. It makes this old woman feel right proud of herself.” She began tipping off the items with her fingers. “The special’s gonna be pot roast, rice and gravy, collard greens and homemade yeast rolls with whipped butter. Dessert’s my homemade lemon meringue pie. I’m makin’ my famous peach iced tea, too. I always put some peaches up for servin’ in the fall. Our county’s known for having the best peaches in the state. They only last a short while. I can ‘em by the case load, it seems. Yet, by the time peach pickin’ comes around, my Mason jars are cleaned out.”
Serenitee’s stomach rumbled, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast. And that was hours ago. “Sounds wonderful. I can’t wait to try the tea.”
Rue heard the unmistakable hunger pangs and a grin spread across her face. “Be sure to come by and get a plate.”
“I’ll do that.” She waved as Rue got into her old Chevy and drove off.
Serenitee finished bagging the leaves and put them at the end of her driveway. After stashing the rake out back, she went in for that much needed shower. And a cold glass of lemonade.
Chapter Five
Trevor had been pacing all day. He needed to talk to Serenitee. She had said he was welcome at her place any time, day or night.
Hell, he knew she was just being neighborly but he was about to take her up on her offer. Besides, he hadn’t seen her in days, though it felt like weeks.
He put on a pair of black jeans and a dark red T-Shirt and made his way to Serenitee’s home.
He knocked. When there was no answer, he knocked again. After a few minutes went by, he felt a panic. Her car was here so she was at home. He saw her raking leaves earlier today. He knocked once more and when she didn’t come to the door, he tried the door to find it unlocked. Coldness settled into his chest.
Being from New York, surely she would have been in the habit of locking her doors. True, some people around here really didn’t lock their doors all the time, but she wasn’t from around here. She couldn’t have gotten comfortable with the notion just yet.
He went inside and couldn’t find her downstairs. He raced up the stairs two at a time.
The bathroom door was slightly ajar and he heard the shower running and music playing.
No wonder she didn’t hear me, he thought, relieved.
He knew she had told him that she didn’t need a bodyguard but he couldn’t help himself. He knew what he was and she didn’t. In a sense, that gave him every right to make sure she was protected. He could honestly say that he didn’t care if she liked it or not.
He heard the shower cut off. His gut clenched when he saw a flash of white. Serenitee was wrapped in a towel. Not a very concealing one but she thought she was alone so she probably didn’t see the need for one.
Through the tiny slit in the door, Trevor could see little beads of water cling to her soft skin. All he could think about was taking his tongue and licking off every droplet of water right down to the dewy beads clinging to the sweet curls between her legs. He would lick her dry while still making her wet.
He swallowed as his crotch tightened. Seeing her wrapped in nothing more than a flimsy towel, all wet, glowing and smelling of her flowery bath soap, challenged his celibacy. For once, he decided to let his impulses win. She wanted him, for that he was sure. He definitely wanted her. Why wait?
The door creaked slightly as he pushed it open.
Serenitee gasped when she saw Trevor on the other side. She should feel intruded upon. She should tell him that it wasn’t polite to walk in on someone showering without their knowledge. She should tell him to wait outside until she was dressed.
She should. But she wouldn’t. Seeing that carnal look in his feral eyes didn’t make her scared of his intrusion. No, what she felt was aroused beyond belief.
“I knocked outside, but there was no answer. I got worried.” He was looking her up and down.
Serenitee tingled with lust. “Checking up on me?” Her voice throaty and low.
“I had to see if you were all right.”
“You see me. Do I look all right?” She was teasing him and loving it.
Trevor growled. “You look more than all right to me.” He walked to her until they were a breath away from touching. He bent down to her ear and whispered, “I want you, Serenitee.”
When he looked up, he saw the approval in her heated gaze. That’s all he needed. She didn’t have to voice an answer. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that she wanted him at this very moment. The room suddenly felt too hot and cramped. Electricity filled the space.
Trevor grunted as he removed the towel from her wet body. Just as he had fantasized, he let his tongue glide over the column of her neck. He caught the water beads as they traveled between her breasts. He licked her nipples clean then moved downward. He dipped his tongue into her belly button. Serenitee let out a sharp cry of surprise as he got every bit of water from between her legs. They trembled as his tongue worked her. Trevor worked his way back up and found her lips ready to be kissed. He did so, thoroughly, as he grabbed Serenitee by her waist and placed her on the vanity. The coolness of the marble was a sharp contrast to the fire flowing through her blood and heated skin.
Serenitee reached for his shirt and pulled it over his head. His fingers moved swiftly to pull down his zipper. He couldn’t be inside her fast enough. He pulled Serenitee’s hips to the edge and grabbed her legs to wrap around his waist. As Serenitee’s hand caressed his cheek, he plunged inside her, never once taking his eyes from hers.
Serenitee’s eyes drooped and her head fell back in a soft moan. That position exposed her luscious neck for Trevor to enjoy. He brought his lips to the pulse of her neck, massaging the tender skin. He pulled out of her slowly bef
ore diving back into her soft folds. Serenitee snaked her arms around his hips and squeezed his hard backside, pushing him into her harder as she crushed her lips into his. They bit, sucked and nibbled each other. Trevor buried himself deeper and deeper into her slick, moist heat.
Trevor moved away for a second to turn Serenitee around so she could face the mirror. She used one hand against the mirror to brace herself. The other hand, she planted on the marble counter.
Trevor pulled her hips to him and again, let his manhood disappear inside her. He watched her facial expressions in the mirror. He smiled at the seductive sway of her breasts, blushed in arousal, as he pumped into her. He could see the veins bulging in his arms from exertion and mounting tension. Trevor bent forward and put his arms around Serenitee to palm each of her breasts. He gave them a playful squeeze, letting his index fingers tease her taut nipples. He buried his face in her soft tresses. His body tightened as his hands squeezed her breasts harder.
Serenitee let out a loud moan. “Unh. Trevor,” she whispered. “---so good.”
“Yes, Serenitee. Yes.” His manhood throbbed with a need to release. “Let go for me. Let me hear you. See you.”
He felt her tighten around him, squeezing his manhood, wanting him to explode.
Serenitee threw her head back. Trevor saw her come apart for him in a loud cry, making his own sweet surrender a powerful completion.
Trevor carried her to the bed and there they rested in one another’s embrace.
Serenitee woke up feeling more rested than she had been in a while. She looked over to find Trevor still sleeping soundly. Her body still tingled at what took place last night. Never in her wildest dreams had she felt this way. Trevor was an excellent lover. He knew how to use his body to her advantage.
Trevor had the sheet just up to the edge of his hips. He slept on his back and it gave Serenitee the perfect time to admire that gorgeous, hard chest, nice sized biceps and the muscles in his abdomen.
Of course, when she first met him, she saw none of these features. Even now, with him naked and beautiful, his intense green eyes were still what had drawn her in. It was the way he looked at her. Like he could see more than you wanted him to but didn’t care.
Shadow of the Wolf Page 3