by Harlow Brown
I decided to find another bathroom to use. There were several to choose from. I went to the powder room downstairs off the living room, then made my way to the pot of morning gold.
No one was here, but there were plates and coffee cups in the sink. I looked outside and tried to see who or if anyone was out there. I saw Whiskey and Briar.
As I walked their way with my coffee in hand, they stopped talking.
“Morning.”
“Same to you.”
“Hey, since Creed is getting the house, I’m going to look for a place to rent. Would y’all know of anywhere?”
“Why wouldn’t you stay here until you are on your feet?” Briar asked.
“Things would be a bit awkward, I imagine. Fury made it crystal clear last night that he didn’t want anything between us.”
“He did what? You realize he is shitty drunk and probably didn’t mean anything he said or did last night, right?” Briar continued.
“He was stone cold sober when he and I talked. He made it clear that he isn’t willing to give me what I need in order to proceed with a relationship. It’s best if I just move. I wouldn’t ask him to. Hell, he isn’t even from here, so he needs to get adjusted and settled first.”
“You’re seriously trying to put him first when he has made it clear, in your opinion, that he isn’t willing to do whatever that you asked of him? Is that right?” Whiskey asked.
“It’s the nice thing to do. I’d do it for anyone.”
“Look. I see the look on your face. You don’t want this to be over. You’re tired, and those red rimmed eyes say it all. You wouldn’t have woken me up crying if you were done. I don’t know what happened between you two, but I know that it ain’t over.”
“I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry.”
“No one ever does. It’s fine. Just don’t be hasty. Remember that whatever you need might come a little slower for Fury. He doesn’t do emotions well.”
“Clearly.” I said and rolled my eyes.
“If you want to look for somewhere to rent, I will keep an eye out.” Briar said.
“I think that would be best. Thanks guys.”
I walked on, coffee in hand, and allowed my thoughts to run wild. Did I want to give him more time? If he didn’t trust me enough last night, how would he trust me enough when he finally decided to open up? What would change? Why wasn’t it enough then? Who was he? What was he hiding that was so bad that no one could know? All the questions flooded, and I still had no answers. I couldn’t do it again. I had to know about his past. I knew he was honest about everything, except that. If I let him slide and not tell me, then how do I know he wouldn’t up and leave me, too?
I began thinking about Crosby again. Had he been open and honest with me, I would have known he needed help. I would have known he was clearly depressed, and his depression was the reason for the drinking. I would have known why he thought he wasn’t good enough for me, and why he thought my life was better without him.
Had Creed been honest with me, I wouldn’t have wondered what happened to him for two years. I put my life on hold for him. He could have told me he wanted to be a marshal, and I wouldn’t have stopped him from fulfilling his dream. I would have encouraged it, and let’s face it, if he were really that upset about me, he wouldn’t have had another woman in the house so soon. He would still be trying to win me back.
I couldn’t risk it. Fury had to tell me. My life couldn’t handle being that shaken up again. I couldn’t handle being that messed up again. Mentally, that was rough.
As I sipped the warm blonde liquid, I stopped and leaned up against a tree. I leaned my head back and shut my eyes. My life really was cursed, and I was convinced that I had done something to piss off the gods that aligned the planets and stars.
Work would distract me. I decided to clean up and get ready for my shift. While showering, I heard the door open.
“Umm, showering here. It’ll be a sec.”
“You can’t run if you are soaking wet and locked in the shower. I choose now to talk to you. It seems as if drinking myself stupid turned out to be an awakening of sorts. Look, I want to tell you everything, but I can’t no...”
“Yeah, you’ve made that clear. Weren’t you sleeping? Could you go back to it? It’d be so much easier if you would just leave me alone. We could both move on.” I said in a hateful tone.
“I wasn’t done. I would rather be sleeping. I feel hammered as hell and this headache is a reminder of what I need to get off my chest. So, listen. As I was saying, I can’t tell you here. It has to be just you and me. No one else can know. I am trusting you with literally everything I have worked for. Call in. Let’s go on a ride. We can go back to the creek if Charlie will let us take the key.” He pleaded.
“Fury, I can’t just skip work. They depend on me, and I need to think about this. Why is it okay for you to talk to me today, but yesterday you couldn’t? This isn’t making sense. It’s really hard to believe you right now. I want to, but I just don’t.”
“Let’s just say I drank until I figured out that whiskey doesn’t fix anything. I drank until an old friend reminded me of what was important. It took getting so fucked up that I could hardly move to realize that I had pushed away the best thing to ever happen to me. Dare I say, even better than what I’m protecting. Rumor, I need you. Just work with me.”
I wanted to. Honestly, I did, but I needed time to think, time to digest all of this. As the hot water continued to beat down on me, I told him, “I’m going to work. You can pick me up at two o’clock. Be there or we don’t have a chance. This has to be it for me.” I stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. His eyes skimmed over my body. He looked at me in a way that I have never been looked at before. He wanted me. Not for my body. He genuinely wanted me. I walked over to him with the towel draped around my chest, put a hand on his face and looked up into those hazel eyes.
“Don’t hurt me, Fury. I don’t think I can take it again. Third time is a charm, yeah?” I said sincerely as I walked to get dressed. Before I got all the way out the door, I turned to him, “Brush your teeth, shower, and for the love of all things good and holy, take a nap. You look like hell.” I winked at him, found my work clothes, and when I looked back at him, he was staring at me with a stupid half grin on his face.
“What are you looking at?”
“You.”
“Why?”
“Here I am trying to be sweet to keep you from doing what I originally said to do and instead convince you to stay, and you gotta go and make light of the situation.”
“Fury, I’d like to talk. Honestly, but the deal is, you smell like a distillery and vomit. You look like you haven’t slept in days. I don’t want to be around you hung over like this. Find yourself some Gatorade, a couple of ibuprofen, and go to sleep. I’ll give you the chance you asked for.”
“I have already taken some and drank a Gatorade, but this headache is legit keeping me awake. I tried to sleep. Epic fail.”
“Next time just come to me. That’ll teach you,” I walked off. Before I got out of the door I turned and said, “I mean it, do those things. It will make you feel better. See you around two.” I went down the stairs, out the door, and headed to wait tables. This had been a very interesting morning.
Work dragged by. The hours were slow, and the customers were few. Thoughts of my afternoon plans kept me in a trance. I heard the door ding and saw a man walk in, walk to a table and sit down. As I approached the table, I realized that the last customer of the day was none other than Creed.
“Creed. What are you doing?” I rolled my eyes at his presence.
“Eating. How about you?”
“Oh, ya know, herding elephants.” I stared at him like he was a moron. “What the hell does it look like I’m doing?”
He stared at me for too long, then leaned in and got too close. “You know we aren’t over right? You can’t seriously just throw away what we had. I told you I had to leave. I didn’t
have a choice. Why can’t we make this work?”
“Creed.” I sighed and sat opposite him. “After I saw the mystery woman’s clothes on our floor when I came to get some things, I was done. If you seriously wanted me, you wouldn’t have had someone in our bed so quickly. The truth is, things worked out just as they were supposed to. It is what it is. I’m not going to force it, and, again, you didn’t have to up and leave me. You could’ve talked to me, or at the very least broke things off with me so I would have some kind of inkling of what happened, and I could have moved on with my life. Oh, but wait. You were selfish and wanted me to wait on you to return.”
He didn’t say anything. I continued, “You took away something from me that no one can give back. You took my time. I can’t get back all the hours I sat and cried or worried about you. I can’t get back all the times I stayed at home while friends went out, hoping you would call. I can’t get back the piece of me that you broke forever. I used to be a trusting person, but I’m a skeptic now. Because of you, I feel like people are always hiding something from me, just waiting on the other shoe to drop. That is no way to live. This is why I’m not coming back. I won’t have this discussion again. Enjoy your meal. I will have someone else come wait on you.”
I got up and went to the back and I found the owner. I needed a breather.
“Hey, would you do me a favor? My ex is out there, and I am not comfortable waiting on him. Would you mind?”
“Sure, honey. It’s two anyhow. I’ll see you later. Go enjoy your day! If the hunk of a man on the motorcycle at your car is any indication of how it’s going to go, I envy you!”
Fury. There he was. Commanding the space while not even trying. He looked tremendously better than when I left this morning. Sleep and a shower did wonders. Now I had to find out if I was about to lose two men in one day.
Chapter 24
Fury
THERE SHE WAS. Right at 2 o’clock, she walked out of the restaurant to me as she promised. I had a hard time believing my eyes, as I didn’t deserve the chance, I was given. I had to pull out all of the stops this go around. She made it clear to me that she wasn’t accepting anything less than what she deserved.
“Hey.”
“Hey back.”
I looked back and saw whom I assumed was Creed sitting in the restaurant.
“Is there something you want to tell me?” I asked, my tone was a little harsh.
“No, that isn’t how this is going to work. You’re the one that has things to tell me, remember?”
“What’s he doing here?”
“Trying to get me back.”
I looked at her and appreciated her honesty.
“I’m here with you, not inside with him, so chill out. Let’s go to the creek or wherever you want to go.”
“Hop on.” I pointed to my bike.
“Let me get my suit.” She grabbed her bathing suit out of the front seat and stuck it in the saddlebag.
I looked at the sad guy in the window and waved as I took off with the one thing that I was going to avoid giving back to him. He shouldn’t have left her.
With the wind in my face and her arms around me, I had a sense of peace and a calmness that I didn’t realize I needed. I hadn’t realized I was so tense. My bike was my sanctuary. Nothing much got to me here. Except Rumor. I welcomed her touch and hoped she could see the me she already knows, which is the only one that matters. The person I was about to tell her about died, and she needed to know that.
We pulled up to the creek where we all had the big idea for the restaurant operation. Charlie was kind enough to lend me the key. I held out my hand and offered to help her down. She touched my hand and I felt electric currents shoot through my chest. I needed her to be okay with my story. Our eyes closed in on each other and for a moment, we stared at one another. I hesitated, made an effort to kiss her, but backed off. I didn’t want to push myself on her.
“You should’ve kissed me.” She said, which caught me by surprise.
So, I did. I held her head in my hands and kissed her like I hadn’t seen her in a month.
“Why did that feel like a goodbye kiss?” She asked, as she searched my eyes for any answers.
“It might be. You might not be able to handle what I’m about to tell you. I’m trusting you here, Rumor. Turns out, the only other person that knows this secret is dead. I didn’t even know he knew. It has to stay between us. Charlie, Raige, Hazel, none of them can know. So much depends on this. I’m only telling you because I can’t be without you. I have to fight for you, step out of my comfort zone, and show you that I am serious. After all you have been through, you deserve the truth. Brace yourself. You’re going to need to, trust me.” We went over to the dock and she sat Indian style in front of me. We were both obviously nervous.
“Let’s get this started, I can’t take the suspense anymore. Did you kill someone? Are you wanted? My mind is all over the place and I need answers.” She shook her head. “I need the truth. Why is it so hard to have that?”
“Rumor, my story isn’t pretty. It’s not easy to talk about. I left my entire life behind to better the life of someone else.”
“Well that doesn’t sound so bad.”
“Just promise me that when I’m done, you’ll remember that I’m not that person anymore, and the guy you know, is the only person I am now.”
“I can’t. I don’t know what I am promising. I promise to keep an open mind and not to judge you.”
I took in a deep breath and shut my eyes. I decided I needed a smoke. I couldn’t do this without one. As I inhaled the tobacco, I felt my nerves start to loosen. When I opened my eyes, I saw Rumor and her clear, blue eyes begging for information. Begging to know me. I started at the beginning and spilled my deepest secret, the one that I was sworn to never repeat. The one I would only repeat to her, because I couldn’t lose her, and this is what it was going to take to keep her.
“The police banged on the front door to my house. That's what I saw as I stood in the distance, hidden in the bushes across the road. I watched them beat on the door to the house where my girl and my unborn baby were sleeping. She wiped the sleep from her eyes as she answered the door. The reflection of the police car lights cast red then blue hues on her beautiful face. I could see her shaking her head and I read her lips as she said, “No, no, no you're wrong. There is a mistake, Eric is alive.” As the officer spoke to her, I watched her crumple into a weeping pile of tears, wrecked with emotion and sorrow as they told her that I was dead. I watched the fire burn out of her eyes. I watched her cry as the flames that burned inside of me died, too. When the officer handed her my hat, she screamed my name, and cradled the hat as she rocked back and forth. I would have given anything to run up and hold her. To tell her that everything was going to be okay, to let her know this was a misunderstanding and I wasn’t leaving her. It wasn’t an option, not if I wanted them to have a fighting chance.
I did what I had to do. I saved Daisy and our son. This life wasn’t for them. She didn’t know what I was involved in. She trusted that I would make all of the right choices and I didn’t. I got into bed with the wrong people, and they turned on me. They told a bunch of lies and kept the money and dope for themselves, and to my suppliers, it looked like I stabbed them in the back and tried to rip them off. We’d had run-in's before and I was already on thin ice with them. The Ray brothers were out for blood, and when they sent word, that was something they never went back on. I had no choice but to turn to the law. In return, I had to leave and be put under witness protection. I needed them safe. I promised her I would do what it took, and I delivered. I had to leave them and never look back…or not get caught anyhow. I loved her so much that I let her go that night. I knew she would be okay without me. She was strong, probably the most emotionally strong person I know. Truthfully, she is better off. However, it doesn’t take the soul-crushing hurt and sternum-splitting ache away. I honestly felt my heart breaking as I watched her crumble apart. Since I knew
I was the cause of her anguish and I wasn’t able to do anything to comfort her, I tried to give her the best gift I could that night, a new life and a clean slate. The rest of the night was a blur. I sat hunkered down in those bushes until the front door shut and the rotating red and blue lights ceased to spin. My world as I knew it was over. I needed to move on and not come back because if I did, they would kill Daisy and the baby. That wasn’t an option. I was off to find my way in a town I didn’t know. I had to make a new life for myself in Panama City Beach, Florida. That’s where the witness protection program sent me, all set with a new identity as Legend Morrow.”
I tried to gauge her reaction for a minute. She was still, wide-eyed, and her mouth was wide open.
“Rumor, say something.”
She moved her eyes to mine and closed her mouth.
“Not what you thought, huh? Do you see why I have been so closed off now? Why I couldn’t open up to you? It isn’t like I didn’t want to, because trust me, I did. My life would have been so much easier. I have a son and an ex-fiancé to protect.”
“Are you clean now?”
“Yes. I haven’t touched it since.”
“You are Eric from the picture.” She paused. “You are Eric!”
“Shhh. Yes. I am Eric Martin. I died in a horrific fiery crash and they identified my remains through dental records. I was cremated. I got here and was given a new name, Legend Morrow. The club dubbed me Fury. I know it’s a lot to take in but understand that I couldn’t tell anyone. Chief had a friend that was a lawman in PCB and he called in a favor. Chief agreed to watch over me. After Chief and I talked during our first meeting, the ball started rolling and I eventually came to be a Chosen One.”
