by Riley Adams
“Derrick! It’s okay! She’s pretty! And I don’t think she has troll manners or anything, either!”
In fact, thought Lulu, Peaches seemed practically perfect. She gave Derrick a big hug when she greeted him and said, “Gran always knows the best people in the world, so I knew you’d be a great guy!”
She had on a darling outfit, thought Lulu, in a very flattering style for her tall, thin figure. She had long blond hair and sparkling blue eyes. Derrick seemed stricken instead of smitten, though.
It’s his nerves! thought Lulu. His old insecurity is rearing its ugly head. Maybe he’d have done better with a really introverted girl or maybe even a less attractive or self-assured one.
But Peaches was quick to try and put him at ease. “I’ve been looking forward to this like you wouldn’t believe,” she said. “It’s horrible moving to a new town and not knowing a soul. I go a little crazy when I get cooped up inside for too long. Derrick,” she said, “you can be my guide for the evening, okay? What’s good to eat at Aunt Pat’s?”
Peggy Sue chortled and leaned in closer. “I’m dying to hear the answer to this one. Peaches, the boy’s got to say that everything’s wonderful. The owner of the restaurant is right here!”
Derrick looked uncertain, his face red as he stammered, “W-well. It is all good.” He looked helplessly at Lulu to rescue him, but then remembered, “But the Brunswick stew is supposed to be really great tonight. Maybe you’d like a little bowl of that on the side.”
“What kinds of food do you like best?” asked Lulu. “We can get you set up with a barbeque sandwich or ribs. Or you could even have a veggie plate if that’s what you usually like.”
“I think I like everything,” said Peaches, laughing. “I can eat the barbeque and veggies, too.”
“Well, Ben whipped up some black-eyed pea salad that’s just one of the best things you’ve ever put in your mouth. It’s got this green pepper and red onion in it and the tastes all combine really well.”
“Ooh. That sounds delicious! I definitely want some of that.”
“Would you like some iced tea?” asked Derrick, shyly. “Lulu makes the best.”
“Why thank you, Derrick!” said Lulu, beaming. “I’ve got two different ones right now, too—a spiced iced tea with orange juice in it, and a regular sweet tea.”
And she wondered, as Peaches and Derrick figured out their order, if this date was such a good idea. Would it give Derrick confidence or make him feel even worse about himself? And here he was with a huge audience—Big Ben, Morty, Buddy, and all the Graces.
Plus Oliver, added Lulu as he walked through the door and up to the group. “I thought I’d run by and just make sure we’re on the same page with the plans for the wedding—like when we’re planning to start cooking that day,” he said.
Lulu felt reluctant to leave Derrick, who was still shooting her helpless looks. “Tell you what, Oliver, why don’t you run back to the kitchen and talk to Ben while he’s cooking. It won’t take long for y’all to figure out the plan for the day.”
Then, to Lulu’s relief, things started going a little better. Derrick smiled a little more and looked more relaxed. Peaches seemed genuinely intrigued by her quiet date and focused on pulling him out of his shell.
Oliver came back out of the kitchen a few minutes later. “Got it all set,” he said to Lulu as he pulled up a chair and joined the group. “I just wanted to make sure I knew the plan.”
Lulu figured it was more likely that he really didn’t have anything else to do except drive Tudy crazy at home. “I figured you two experts wouldn’t have a problem getting the wedding plans arranged. Y’all just tell me when to be there and I’ll make sure I make it then,” she said.
There was a lull in the conversation and Peggy Sue was diametrically opposed to conversational pauses.
“Wasn’t it awful about poor Ginger?” She reached out and patted Peaches’s hand. “That’s why Evelyn isn’t here right now. She’s that cut up about it. You see, her friend Ginger was murdered yesterday.”
Oliver suddenly looked like the breath was knocked out of him. Peggy Sue noticed it and said, “Oh, you didn’t know? Yes, it really looks like there’s a killer on the rampage—shooting people right and left. It’s awful, isn’t it?”
Jeanne said, “Oliver, I saw you the other day with Ginger—you were friends with her, too?”
Oliver quickly said, “No, you must be mistaken, Jeanne. Ginger and I weren’t friends. We really barely knew each other.”
Jeanne’s thin face was serious. “But, Oliver, it was you. I was driving away from Graceland after my docent duty and I saw you and Ginger talking in a parking lot. I remember it all very clearly because it was so far out—you know how Graceland is a bit of a drive—and because I didn’t realize y’all knew each other.”
Lulu raised her eyebrows. Jeanne, who read her Bible several times a day, was not telling a lie. Of course, she could have been mistaken, which was what Oliver clearly wanted her to think.
Peggy Sue’s eyes opened wide. “Oh! And did Ginger call you? Because she was asking Evelyn if she had your cell phone number. I think she knew somebody who knew somebody who owned a restaurant or something. So Evelyn gave it to her.”
He gave a tight smile. “Maybe she never got around to it before her sudden demise. But, no, Jeanne, it wasn’t me you saw. One of the things about being graying, balding, and stout is that you look like every other middle-aged man out there. It’s an easy mistake to make. Besides, I had a long dental appointment that afternoon. And, believe me, I’d rather have been hanging out in a parking lot than getting that dental work done.” He rubbed his palms against his jeans and Lulu wondered if it was because he was perspiring from nerves.
Jeanne opened her mouth to say something else, but then pressed her lips together tightly. She must have decided not to argue, figured Lulu. Which made sense, because Oliver obviously wasn’t going to suddenly admit to being Ginger’s mystery man.
“Looks like Evelyn is ready to take on the world again,” said Buddy with a nod at the door.
Lulu walked over to greet Evelyn but was beat to it by Big Jack Bratcher, who was just leaving with a to-go box. He gave them both hugs.
“Hi, darlin’,” he said to Evelyn. “I wanted to see if you wanted to come to my fund-raising dinner at the lake this weekend.”
Evelyn put her hands on her hips, “Didn’t I already max out with donations this year? I mean, really, Big Jack.”
“You sure did—I told you that you were one of my top donors! No, this is just a big thank-you for everything you’ve done. Everybody else has to pay to attend. And, Lulu, why don’t you come along with her? You’ve helped me out a lot by hosting fund-raisers here at Aunt Pat’s.”
Evelyn was still hemming and hawing. “But we have to schlep three hours out to the lake.”
“For crying out loud, Evelyn! You have a mansion sitting right on the water. And one of them fancy saltwater pools. . . . Don’t you go there about every weekend? So you and Tommie just pack up, bring Lulu along, and come to my party. I’ve got that fabulous New South chef—Taylor Franklin—to cook for us. We’re going to have some pan-roasted duck. Or, if you want something else, he’s also doing a baked grits with some country ham and mushrooms. And his cornbread rivals Lulu’s. It’s not spicy, though—it’s sweet.”
Lulu’s stomach growled ominously. “Evelyn, let’s do it! You could definitely use a break and I could use one, too. I can get away from the restaurant if it’s just for a day. Couldn’t we head over there early Saturday morning and then come back early on Sunday?”
Evelyn shrugged. “Why not? Except maybe I need to let the Memphis police know where I’m going to be.”
Big Jack’s eyes widened. “You’re not headed out to the pokey, are you, Evelyn? Good Lord. I sure don’t need my biggest supporter locked up.”
“No! I mean, I guess I’m not. I didn’t do anything. Well, I didn’t do anything but what I’ve told y’all about�
��wrecking Adam’s condo. But who knows what kind of skullduggery the Memphis police thinks I’ve been up to.”
Big Jack nodded solemnly. “They talked to me, too, Evelyn. But we knew that was coming. Since I left that message on the machine.”
“How did it go?” asked Lulu sympathetically. “Were they rough on you with the questioning?”
“Oh sure! Yeah, they want you to think that they know you did it. They get you all worked up until you think you did do it. They’re hoping to get you to slip up or confess or something. But I just told them . . . I’d screwed up and done something stupid. That stupid thing was to cheat on my wife—not kill somebody. And I’d been doubly stupid in that I was out in public misbehaving and this twerp took my picture with the lady with his cell phone.”
“How did that go over?” asked Lulu.
“Oh, well, they were convinced that I killed him, still. Or at least they acted like they were. But they finally let me go. And so far Lisa doesn’t know and I’d really like to keep it that way. I’ve learned my lesson: cheating is for losers. Believe me; I’m not making that same mistake again.”
Evelyn covered her mouth, looking like one of those “speak no evil” monkeys. Lulu said, “We won’t say a thing about it. And thanks for inviting us to your party. Sounds like fun!”
Chapter 14
The next day, Lulu stood in her closet door and stared at her collection of floral dresses. What kind of occasion was this? She’d hosted Big Jack’s fund-raisers before at Aunt Pat’s, but they’d always been really casual and fun. They were the kind of events that if a person wore a floral dress they might be overdressed for it. She picked up the phone.
“Evelyn? It’s me. This fund-raiser for Big Jack—what are you wearing?”
“Oh, Lulu. It’s more than a fund-raiser—it’s a gala. I read something about it in the paper this morning. It’s going to be all glitzy and some folks from the Memphis Journal are going to be there taking pictures.”
Lulu’s heart sank as she looked at her choices. “Well, I have that navy dress. I suppose I could wear that one. Do you remember my navy dress?”
There was a pause on the other end of the line. “Do you mean your funeral dress? The one you pull out for graveside services?”
“Won’t that be okay?”
Another pregnant pause. “Tell you what, Lulu. I could use a new gown anyway. Let’s go out shopping and find something really fun. Do you mind if I call up Tudy Hatley and see if she can come along? I’ve been promising myself I’d take her out to do something fun. She’s been so bummed out about Oliver and losing the restaurant. And then I saw her when I was grocery shopping yesterday and she looked just awful. I guess he really must be driving her nuts or something. We can kill two birds with one stone. Shopping and lunch! A girl’s day out! Fun-fun!”
Lulu said, “Okay, Evelyn. As long as y’all can give me some advice about what to buy. I just don’t have any idea what to wear to this thing.” She hung up and sighed. The word “gown” meant “expensive” in Lulu’s book. And shopping, as an activity, rated only slightly lower than cleaning out the refrigerator.
Evelyn squinted at Lulu as she hesitantly walked out of the dressing room. “Now that one is a little better. Don’t you think that one is better, Tudy?”
Tudy, who’d been very sweet but remarkably unhelpful said, “Lulu, you look beautiful!” just like she had the last five times Lulu had shown them a dress.
Lulu looked at herself in the tri-fold mirror and grimaced. “It’s cinching my waist and making the fabric poof out in the back. My fanny looks huge!” She turned around and looked over her shoulder at herself in the mirror. “It’s not, is it?”
Both women erupted into soothing noises, “No, of course not!” “It’s the dress—it’s just not the right one.”
“That type of fabric gets all bunchy, honey.”
Lulu gloomily slouched into the changing room to try on the next dress. “Funny how Evelyn was able to find something right away. Must have something to do with being a size four.”
It took three more tries, but finally there was a simple, long black dress that made Lulu feel great when she put it on. With her height (although Lulu was dismayed that she’d been shrinking a little each year), they discovered that she could carry off a longer dress, that black was slimming, and that simple was better. With a huge sigh of relief, Lulu paid for the dress (gulping a little at the price).
As the ladies made their long walk to the food court, Lulu kept looking sideways at Tudy. Something just wasn’t right with her. She seemed really distracted and not caught up in Evelyn’s conversation about evening bags like she’d ordinarily be.
“Okay, Tudy,” said Lulu abruptly. “Spill it.”
Tudy knit her brows. “Spill it?”
“What’s bothering you, honey? Here Evelyn is having a passionate monologue about beaded evening bags versus sequined evening bags and you’re not even jumping in to give an opinion. As girly as you are, you should be telling us all kinds of things about glamorous pocketbooks—where to buy them, what’s in style. So tell me—what’s on your mind?”
Tudy blinked hard and walked even slower than she had been. “Oh, y’all. I don’t know where to start. Oliver is making my life miserable right now!” She sniffed loudly but seemed determined to keep the tears at bay.
“The reading-out-loud thing again?” Evelyn shrugged. “It’s annoying, but I think I could overlook it. Or do like Derrick does and just plug yourself into an iPod and nod every once in a while when he’s talking to you.”
“No,” said Lulu. “It’s the fact he’s trying to reorganize her kitchen right under her nose. That’s just something we cooks don’t take lightly.”
Tudy shook her head violently. “No, y’all. It’s even worse. Oliver killed Adam Cawthorn. And he was having an affair with Ginger!” This time a dogged tear managed to slip out before Tudy angrily swiped it away. “And he’s going to end up spending the rest of his life in the big house!”
Evelyn and Lulu gave each other quick, gawking looks before shutting their mouths and putting an arm around Tudy.
“Now what makes you think such a thing, Tudy? It’s hard for me to picture Oliver as a gallivanting murderer,” said Lulu.
Tudy gave another sniff. “I told you about the way he looked all beat up that day Adam died. I know he must have gotten in a fight with him. And I was wrong to think it was about the restaurant. I mean—the fact he blamed Adam for putting us out of business was part of it. But now I know the reason that Adam was fighting him . . . because Oliver has been having an affair with Ginger! And Adam was jealous!”
Evelyn winced at her logic. “Whoa. Tudy, I just don’t believe a word of this. Remember that Adam and I were having a fling and Adam didn’t give a rip about Ginger anymore. In fact, he was trying to get rid of her.”
“I think he didn’t want Ginger for himself, but he didn’t want anyone else to have her, either.” Tudy’s chin was set with determination.
Lulu said, “What makes you think that Oliver and Ginger were having an affair, Tudy?” Try as she might, she couldn’t picture Oliver Hatley and Ginger Cawthorn together.
Tudy’s mouth wobbled for a moment until she regained control. “Well, you know how secretive he’s been, right? After his fight with Adam that he hasn’t even admitted to. He just seemed sneaky and that’s not like Oliver. The day that Ginger was killed? I’d driven out to Graceland to have lunch with Jeanne after she got off of her docent duty there. And Jeanne and I saw them—in a parking lot right on the side of the road.”
“Saw them doing what?” asked Evelyn with horror.
Tudy waved her hand around. “Saw them talking! Does it matter? They were together. And I saw her number in his cell phone, too.”
Evelyn flushed guiltily. “Oh. I gave Ginger Oliver’s cell phone number. She said she had some possible ideas for restaurant openings for him.”
Tudy shrugged. “No matter how she got the number, the resul
ts would have been the same.”
“Tudy, Oliver was in the restaurant just yesterday and Jeanne mentioned that she’d seen him with Ginger—she didn’t mention you—and he denied he’d even been there.”
“It was him, Lulu. Believe me, I know. I saw them talking together. And I totally lost my appetite after that; I called Jeanne up—she was following me—and told her we’d have to take a rain check on lunch. I went home and took to my bed for the rest of the day. I didn’t even lift my head up off the pillow.”
Lulu tried to reason with Tudy, who seemed about as stubborn as Lulu had ever seen her. “But what about Ginger? If Oliver killed Adam and was in love with Ginger, then who killed Ginger? It just doesn’t make any sense, honey.”
Tudy said, “I can tell you haven’t been watching All My Children lately, Lulu. If you had been watching the soaps you’d know that when it comes to love, all your buried passions come bubbling up to the surface. It’s clear to me that Oliver killed Ginger. Think about it—she was jolted when Adam was murdered and realized her true feelings for him. She was consumed by guilt and renewed feelings of love! So she told Oliver that they couldn’t continue seeing each other. In a fit of rage, Oliver kills Ginger.”
Lulu’s mouth dropped at this melodramatic logic. “But what about his dental appointment? Oliver says he went to the dentist that afternoon.”
Tudy’s face darkened. “Except the dentist’s office called to tell us they were assessing us with a twenty-five dollar missed appointment fee. So wherever he was, it sure wasn’t getting his teeth cleaned.”
Evelyn and Lulu both bit their lips to keep from telling Big Jack’s story. But a promise was a promise. They both tried to cheer her up by reassuring her that Oliver was devoted to Tudy and would never dream of cheating on her.
Fortunately, a nice distraction unexpectedly came their way or else Lulu would have still desperately been wracking her brain to think up something else to talk about. They were standing in line at the Chinese buffet when Tudy motioned to the back of a man’s head.
