by Shayla Black
And this is not the time for this shit. Not if I want to keep her alive.
Taking a deep breath, Ryder shoved the fury back and focused instead on the problem at hand. He was about to let go of Lily’s arm and step into the hallway, when he heard a deep voice say, “Drop the gun and kick it over to me or I shoot her.”
Fuck! The gritty, accented words had come from across the hall, where Yuri Radovich was now standing in the open doorway to Ryder’s room, gun in hand. The sound he’d heard had probably been when his door was opened, and he thanked God the asshole had chosen to search that room first.
“You can’t shoot her if you don’t have a shot,” Ryder replied, tightening his grip on Lily’s arm. But the monster wasn’t fooled. With a low laugh, Rado eyed the position of Ryder’s body and the visible portion of his arm, then shifted his aim. If he fired the powerful 9mm now, the bullet would go right through the wall and into Lily.
Son of a fucking bitch.
As if she could read his mind, Lily said, “Don’t.” Her low voice vibrated with anger. “Don’t you dare do it, Scott. You know he’s going to kill me anyway. Don’t you dare give him your weapon and leave yourself unprotected!”
“Smart girl, your Lily. But do you really want to stand there and watch her bleed out, knowing you could have prolonged the moment?” Radovich murmured. “Maybe have even given the men who will no doubt be rushing to your rescue a chance to get here in time? We disabled several of the alarm systems you had in place. But who knows if we got them all, eh?”
The bastard was right. He had to buy them more time. Dropping his gun to the floor, Ryder kicked it across the hall, Lily’s shocked gasp echoing in his ears as he watched Radovich squat down to retrieve the weapon.
With a gun in each hand now, Radovich moved forward, nearing the doorway to Lily’s room, and Ryder yanked her behind him, using his body as a shield as he backed away from the door. With Radovich standing in the semi-lit hallway, he had a clearer view of the terrorist, and the man was just as ugly as he remembered. Tall and bulky with an oily head of thinning hair and jowls like a bulldog, he had a crooked nose that sported red veins from too much vodka over too many years. He smelled like sweat and smoke and something sour, the combination enough to turn your stomach if you took too many deep breaths.
“I know what you were trying to do at the club tonight, Mr. Ryder,” Rado drawled with a gloating smile, his Slavic accent adding a guttural edge to his words. “You wanted to draw me out. And it worked.” His smiled widened. “Just not quite the way you wanted, eh?”
“You came alone?”
“Of course not. My men are dealing with the sheriff’s brother as we speak. So I’m afraid he won’t be much help to you this evening.”
Ryder shoved any worry about Mike to the back of his mind, knowing he couldn’t let it get to him. Not now, when he had to find a way to get Lily through this alive. Stalling, hoping like hell that Mike had gotten the chance to call Ben, he asked, “How did you know where to find her?”
Rado’s heavy-lidded eyes glittered with triumph. “Given what I know about you, I thought it a safe bet that she would run here for help. Who better to protect her than the man who would die for her?”
“What do you know about me?” he demanded, the hairs on the back of his neck rising as dread slithered through him like a knife. “What the hell are you talking about?”
Radovich glanced at the right side of his face, then smirked. “The night I gave you that pretty scar, Mr. Ryder. The night you and your men destroyed nearly everything I’d built before you were captured. You made your feelings regarding the girl painfully obvious.”
He shook his head, trying to remember, to understand what the jackass was talking about. He remembered Rado’s threats . . . but not what he’d said in response. Only what he’d been willing to do in order to stop him.
Obviously relishing the sound of his own voice, Rado said, “I was enjoying myself that night, telling you about your friends who had already died, then promising you that I would take out Heller and everyone that you had ever cared about in this world. That’s when you came at me like a rabid dog, screaming the name Lily as you tried to kill me. You had so many injuries you could barely stand, but you kept coming, somehow staying on your feet, swearing that you would gut me before ever letting me touch her. When you were close enough I slashed your face. I just wish I had taken the time to kill you then, instead of leaving you half-dead on the floor to deal with later. I’d wanted more time to properly see to your torture.”
Ryder tried to remember, but his memories were hazy. He just recalled being driven beyond sanity by Rado’s threats, knowing he needed to kill the bastard before the terrorist harmed Lily. He’d been fueled by raw emotion, rather than tactical skill, and it had nearly cost him his life. In his blind rage, he’d allowed the bastard to cut him. But like Radovich had just said, he’d been left alone when something had drawn the terrorist and his men to another part of the building. When Ryder had finally pulled himself back to his feet, he’d almost done the unthinkable and blown up the entire city block using the explosives that were stored in the room just to ensure that the bastard was killed. But then Rado had returned. And he’d been alone. Knowing he had only moments before the rest of Rado’s men arrived, Ryder had shoved the knife that’d been hidden in the sole of his left boot right through Radovich’s heart. The terrorist had collapsed, blood pooling beneath him as more bubbled on his lips, and Ryder had escaped out the second-story window, managing to make it to the safety of his team’s mobile command center by sheer force of will.
He’d never realized what he’d revealed in those telling moments that he and Radovich had faced off against each other. Even after Lily had run to him, he’d been thinking the terrorist wanted her because of Heller. But it’d been because of him.
Son of a bitch. He couldn’t deal with this now. Had to somehow shove it down with all the other shit he would have to face once this fucker was no longer breathing. It didn’t matter that Rado had the guns. He wasn’t going to let this bastard win. If he had to give his own life to save Lily’s then he would. He had no qualms about dying to keep her alive. But if it came to that, he was taking the jackass with him.
“And what now?” he asked, curling his lip in a sneer. “Are you really such a pussy that you’re going to just shoot me?”
Radovich lifted his bushy brows. “What do you suggest?”
His voice was low and controlled. “Put the gun down and fight me, man to man.”
“Last time we did that, you didn’t fare so well,” Rado drawled, eyeing his scar.
Ryder gave him a sharp smile. “Then what are you afraid of?”
Color rose in the terrorist’s face and his eyes narrowed. “I’m not afraid, Mr. Ryder. But I’m also not stupid.”
Going straight for the bastard’s ego, he shook his head and laughed. “I know a pussy when I smell one, Radovich. What’s the problem? Are the years catching up to you? You just don’t have the balls to fight me now, do you?”
Radovich came a step closer, radiating cold, deadly rage. “I think, instead, I will enjoy putting bullets in your most vulnerable body parts, one by one, to make up for the shit you forced me to live through after stabbing me in the heart. I spent nearly six months in a coma, then another three in recovery. Almost a year went by before I could climb out of bed and deal with the scum that had tried to take over my crew while I was healing. And finally, when I was once again at the top, I knew it was time to come after the man who had tried so hard to destroy me.” Rado’s gaze slid to Lily, and his eyes gleamed with malice as they came back to Ryder. “But first,” he snarled, spittle spraying from his wide lips, “I wanted to take away everything that had ever meant anything to him. I wanted to start with what meant most. Which is why I plan on leaving you alive just long enough for you to watch me take your woman, ripping her into pieces, before I finally take your life!”
“Better yet, asshole, why don’t you ju
st drop the guns?” Mike rasped, the barrel of his 9mm pressed against the back of Rado’s head. “Drop them and kick them over to Ryder. Now! Before I decide these walls will look more lively with your fucking pea-sized brain splattered all over them.”
The pistols made a heavy clunking sound as they hit the floor, Rado’s kick skidding them toward Ryder, who stopped them with his foot. “Take it,” he said to Lily, after picking up both weapons and holding Rado’s out to her.
Slipping his own gun into the back of his jeans, he shot a glance at Mike, thankful as hell to see him. “The others?” he asked, wondering about the terrorist’s men.
Mike’s voice was flat, his gaze hooded. “Dead.”
Cracking his knuckles, Ryder said, “Hear that, Rado? Your dumbass goons failed. It’s just me and you now.”
“Scott,” Lily whispered, touching the back of his arm. “You don’t have to do this.”
He looked at Mike. “Get her out of here.”
“No!” She moved to the far side of the room, holding her hands out in front of her, as if she could stop Mike from grabbing her. But she was looking at Ryder as she said, “Please, don’t make me leave you.”
Mike forced a furious-looking Radovich into the bedroom ahead of him, his gun still pointed at the fucker as Mike made his way over to Lily. But he didn’t try to force her out. He simply positioned her in the open doorway, and put his body in front of hers, making it clear that he would protect her with his life. Satisfied that she was safe, Ryder turned his attention to the man he was going to enjoy the hell out of killing. “Now we deal with this in a fair fight, you ugly son of a bitch.”
He would have been lying if he’d said he thought it would be easy. He knew from the intel he’d collected on Radovich that the terrorist had grown up on the streets in one of the poorest cities in Eastern Europe, where he’d had to battle daily for survival. The man also had nearly three inches on Ryder and outweighed him by a good fifty pounds, with a right hook that felt like a fucking wrecking ball. But Ryder had speed and training on his side, and the bone-deep determination to wipe the floor with the asshole for what he’d done to Lily and her family. They traded a dozen punches, landing hammering blows to the other’s ribs, kidneys, and face. A stream of red poured from the terrorist’s nose, while Ryder’s lip was busted open, his tongue tasting the sharp, metallic tang of his own blood. He could tell Radovich was tiring, his fondness for vodka taking its toll on his stamina, and Ryder moved his head from side to side while retaining his fighting stance, anticipating the bastard’s next move. When Rado suddenly rushed him, trying to take him to the floor, Ryder spun to the side and rammed his knee into Rado’s belly, doubling him over. He followed with a swift uppercut to his chin that snapped his head back, then a powerful right hook to his jaw that sent the asshole crashing to the floor. Radovich groaned, looking dazed, not even trying to get up.
Taking his gun from the back of his jeans, Ryder aimed the barrel at the center of Rado’s greasy forehead. Then he lifted his gaze and looked at Lily, who was peeking around Mike’s arm. “Go to my room.”
Tears filled her eyes, her gaze darting to the scar on his cheek. “I don’t want to leave you with him,” she whispered, the words thick with fear.
“I know. But I need you to do this for me, Lil. And I don’t need an argument. Please. Just go.”
She frowned, but nodded. She didn’t look back as she made the short walk across the hallway, then closed the door to his bedroom behind her.
“I’ll wait in the hallway,” Mike said, making it clear that he didn’t object to what was about to happen.
When they were alone, Ryder looked back down at Radovich. “You can’t shoot a man who’s already down,” the terrorist said with a gritty laugh.
A cold smile twisted Ryder’s mouth. “That just shows how little you know me.”
“You’re a lawman. A soldier,” Rado sneered in his thick accent. “Your honor ties your hands and makes you weak. Your mercy makes you pathetic.”
“You came after my woman and you think I’m going to show you fucking mercy, you miserable piece of shit?”
Radovich wiped at the blood on his face, his upper body twisted to the side as he braced himself on an elbow. “You don’t have any choice,” he muttered.
“If the choice is between my honor and her safety,” Ryder said in a low, deadly voice, “then it isn’t any choice at all.”
As if he was finally starting to get the picture, the terrorist’s eyes widened. “Are you serious? You’re going to let a little snatch decide your actions?”
“She’s my fucking heart, you stupid prick. And you’re nothing more than a dead man.” He lowered his aim, then fired, shooting the bastard straight through the heart, killing him instantly. But he put a second bullet through Rado’s forehead, and would have kept firing if not for the fact that Lily was waiting for him.
Stepping over Radovich’s stinking body, Ryder intended to find her and just . . . hold her, but Ben and a small army of deputies suddenly arrived and almost two hours had gone by before Ryder finally made his way to his bedroom. He found her inside, talking on the phone, making arrangements for what sounded like a car service to take her to the airport.
“Lily? What’s going on?” he demanded, shutting the door to the room behind him.
She set the phone down on the bedside table, then turned to face him. Her face was tense and pale. “Now that Radovich is dead,” she said quietly, wrapping her arms around her middle, “I . . . um, called one of my friends in Virginia. She’s bought me a plane ticket home and paid for a car to pick me up. I just needed to give the driver the address.”
“What the fuck? You’re just gonna up and leave?” he scraped out, while inside he was thinking No, don’t do this. Don’t make me lose you. Not now . . .
She sniffed, then took a deep breath before saying, “I’ve had some time to think while I was waiting for you, and I . . . I know you well enough to know that what he said about you being the reason he came after me is only going to push you away from me again. I can’t go through that,” she whispered, swiping at her tears with her fingertips. “Not again. I have to get out before it happens.”
“That doesn’t make any fucking sense!”
Her mouth trembled. “I’m sorry, Scott. I just . . . I know we won’t be able to get through this without something strong holding us together. Without something that’s permanent and lasting. I know . . . I know you care about me. But that’s not going to be enough.”
Christ. This was such a fuckup, and he didn’t know whether to be pissed that she had so little faith in him . . . or if he should just kick his own ass for failing to make his feelings for her clear. “You think I care about you? Like the same way I’d care about my elderly neighbors or a pal at work?” He moved closer, hating the pain he could see shimmering in her beautiful eyes. But, damn it, he was hurting, too. “After last night, is that honestly what you think, Lily?”
She bit her lower lip, and her gaze slid away. “I don’t want to fight with you.”
Bitterness sharpened his voice. “Then you should have thought of that before trying to sneak out on me.”
Her head snapped back in his direction and her eyes went wide. “I wasn’t sneaking anywhere. I was going to talk to you before I left.”
“Yeah? Then call back and cancel that damn car.”
“Scott, I—”
“There’s a hell of a lot we need to say to each other,” he growled, cutting her off, “and we can’t do it here. At least come back to my house with me. You owe me that much.”
She sucked in a sharp breath, then reluctantly nodded, calling the car service to say that she’d be in touch with a new address and pickup time as soon as possible. Working his jaw, Ryder grabbed their bags—a deputy had brought hers from across the hall earlier—then followed her out of the room. They came across Ben in the living room, which was still crowded with deputies, and Ryder told him he was taking Lily home. Ben nodded, cas
ting a worried look at her pale face, no doubt thinking she was upset because of what had happened with Rado, and Ryder didn’t correct him. But he knew Lily well enough to understand that even though she’d been concerned for his safety, she was as thankful as he was that Radovich had finally been dealt with, once and for all.
They made their way out to the Jeep after finding Mike and thanking him, and the drive to his house was quietly tense, the air heavy with the weight of everything that needed to be said. No matter how many ways he turned it over in his head, Ryder knew that the crux of the matter was the fact that she trusted him. Since coming back into his life, she’d trusted him with her body, with her heart, and with her well-being. It was far past time that he trusted her, too. And maybe, just maybe, he needed to trust that together they were right where they were meant to be.
Fuck, there was no maybe about it. He was meant to be by this woman’s side. Today. Tomorrow. For fucking eternity. And there was nothing he was going to let stand in his way. Not fear. Not his past. And sure as fuck not his desire to protect her. It was what he’d been made for. If he was crazy and overly protective at times, Lily would handle him. Hell, that’s what she did best.
After all this time, he finally got it. He’d always felt like he was getting it wrong with Lily because he hadn’t done what he should have done the second she was legal. Which was claim her sweet little ass by putting a ring on her finger, his name after hers, and make sure his fucking stamp of ownership was on every inch of her. And he didn’t feel like a possessive ass for wanting it, because he expected her to claim him in the same fucking way.
The sun was only just coming up as he parked the Jeep in his driveway and climbed out, not bothering with their bags, just wanting to get her inside as quickly as possible. She followed him up the walkway and he opened the front door, letting her go inside first. Then he went in and locked the door behind him. If he could have barricaded the damn thing to keep her there with him, he would have. He couldn’t stand the thought of her leaving him. Of not going to sleep every night with her soft little body in his arms, and waking up to her beautiful smile.
