Continued bitching was thwarted as a woman staggered into the bathroom. We exited and made our way through throngs to the bar. Scanning our crowd with jaundiced eyes, we exchanged a nod. Drinks at the bar would be a better option. Andy and Martin joined us.
‘Had enough substandard conversation?’ Shona said.
Martin rolled his eyes and put his arm around her. ‘Yeah, the latest topic was an argument she’d had with her boss, who does everything to make Bianca’s life miserable.’
Brigid sniggered. ‘Give me her phone number. I’ll call and thank her.’
Laughter lifted our mood. Our evening was more fun, although, with Eddie cozying up to Bianca, it was marginal for me.
Frustrated, I simmered.
Back at home, by silent agreement we ignored each other, sleeping as far away as the mattress permitted.
✽ ✽ ✽
Lisa and I had arranged to meet at the station the next day. I’d been waiting ten minutes when my phone vibrated.
I took one look at the text message, instantly pissed off. Lisa was running ten minutes late. For a full minute I dithered, torn between ditching Lisa and catching my train, or waiting for her. My better side won, begrudging the wait, impotent as my train arrived and departed. Shuffling from cold foot to cold foot, I found a handy niche to wait away from weekend workers and the cold December wind. Just as the next train pulled in, I saw Lisa shoving her way through the jostling masses.
She wasn’t alone.
My heart sank to my boots. Bianca, with a huge smile, clutched Lisa’s hand, stumbling along behind her.
Shit.
Forcing a smile, we barely had time to say hello before we were shoved en masse through the doors onto the train, landing breathless in an aisle. Standing room only on this trip. Stuffy and smelling of sweat, greasy hair and the great unwashed, we were packed like sardines, with no opportunity to talk. A brief respite, before the train pulled into King’s Cross and we erupted from the carriages. Stepping out, I yanked Lisa and Bianca to one side, letting everyone surge ahead. When the crowd slowed to a trickle, I turned to them.
‘That’s much better. I know this great cafe not far from here. C’mon.’ I led the way up and out into the winter chill.
Situated near a group of boutiques, a mini supermarket and homewares store, my cafe of choice served as a bookstore as well as an eatery. We nabbed a table and sat down, pink-cheeked, stripping off scarves and hats. A brief glance at the shelves of books, followed by a reluctant glance at my companions told me good manners were in order. I couldn’t meander around the bookshelves while coffee brewed, not today. Stifling frustration, I smiled as a waitress headed to our table.
Given that Lisa said she’d have breakfast, I ordered toast, eggs and bacon, only to find both Lisa and Bianca had already eaten and wanted only coffee before heading off to the shops.
Wrongfooted, I nearly turned to cancel my order, but the words died in my mouth – why let these two women spoil my appetite? They exchanged a look I knew I was meant to see, but at the same time was unreadable. A pinprick, meant to demoralize. Seeds of uneasiness washed through me. My fun day had been hijacked by two spiteful women.
A headache pulsed in time with my heartbeat. I rubbed my neck, fingers clumsy, blinking back tears.
‘Problem?’ Lisa asked, her eyes cool.
‘Headache.’
Lisa’s eyes shifted sideways to Bianca. I caught the immediate malicious glee on her face. Red hot loathing swept from my gut right down to my toes and then just as fast up to the top of my head. Lightheaded, anger exploded inside. I kept my face still. Letting them see they’d upset me would be handing them a gift.
I speared Bianca with an icy gaze. ‘Why is it funny to you that I have a headache?’
‘It’s not funny at all,’ she said, with total lack of sincerity. ‘But it’s typical that you’d accuse me of something nasty.’
I didn’t want to rise to the bait. ‘Perhaps it’s just typical that you would think that of me.’ I twisted round in my seat, willing breakfast to arrive, grateful to see our waitress bearing down with coffee.
With drinks on the table I tuned into their discussion about shopping lists. Pointedly excluding me, even with shopping list in my hand, there wasn’t the slightest flicker of interest from Bianca. Lisa gave me a cursory flick of her eyes a couple of times.
Bianca was discussing her boyfriend’s gift for Christmas.
‘I really want to have Tiffany diamond earrings, you know, something swanky I can show off at work.’ she said, finally looking at me. Avid for my attention, she assessed my interest. ‘I’ve seen three different pairs I really want. He said he’d choose for me.’
I didn’t give a flying toss what she wanted. My foot tapped, impatient with these two, wishing we could get going. Breakfast had become an essential nuisance.
My face showing polite interest, I waited for her to push her one-upmanship, no doubt hoping I’d be jealous.
Her boyfriend must have a stack of money, considering all the expensive extras she’d had to date.
‘That’s nice,’ I said, making no effort to gush. ‘Who’s your boyfriend? He gave you that ring, didn’t he?’ My politeness bordered on indifference.
‘Oh, just someone I met a while ago. Yeah, he gave me this promise ring. He’s planning another one for our engagement. Like yours.’ She held up my hand, diamonds glittered in early sunlight. Then she held up her hand, seeing both sparkling together. ‘Yeah, just like yours.’
I made no comment. Encouraging one-upmanship would be tedious and meaningless.
Bianca couldn’t resist exulting in her anonymous paramour. ‘Yeah, he’s gorgeous and great in the sack, too. A real stud.’
Lisa snorted, turning it into a cough when I eyed her sharply.
They had a secret. And obviously wanted me to know, without divulging details. God, how old were they?
Tired of this sly subterfuge, I turned to Bianca. ‘When are you going to bring him to meet all of us? And what’s his name?’
Bianca smirked. ‘You’ll all get to meet him, when he’s ready. He likes me to call him Dick, on account of his, you know....’ She gestured crudely.
Lisa had a prolonged coughing fit, eyes watering. She dabbed a tissue to her eyes. Puzzled, I sat back to watch them. Somebody was being laughed at. Me, of course, but someone else?
Lisa nodded and sipped her coffee, eyes brimming with laughter.
‘Mind you, ‘I’ve taught him a thing or two.’ Bianca sniggered. ‘His wife’s a real drag and he finds her useless in the sack, like a lump of lead. She’s one of those wives who’s stopped trying now she’s married. More fool her.’
Ah, so he was married. No wonder we hadn’t met him.
‘Are there any children?’ I tried to keep my tone neutral, but don’t think I was convincing. Bianca was the pits. Fancy bragging about a sordid affair with a married man.
‘No, thank Christ. Just as well, really. I don’t fancy being a stepmum to somebody else’s brats.’
‘He’s leaving his wife for you?’ I tried not to sound skeptical.
‘Yeah, Rose. He really is.’ She said, her face sour. ‘Do you think it’s impossible for someone to love me?’
‘No, that’s not what I meant.’ I should have kept my mouth shut. She was sharpening her barbs on my careless words.
‘What did you mean then?’
Fortunately, my breakfast arrived at that point. I was able to avoid further conversation. As I ate, I wondered why the husband hadn’t already left his wife if he was so determined to be with Bianca.
Bianca and Lisa had already downed their coffee and watched me, itching to hurry me. Self-conscious, eating became uncomfortable. Impatient, Bianca jumped up.
‘Shops should be opening now. I saw a great little boutique down the road a bit. I’m just going to take a look while you finish your brekkie, okay?’
Relieved and annoyed, I nodded. Go already, I silently urged.
‘I won’t be lo
ng.’
I didn’t believe her and I didn’t know what to say. My day was a bust. These two were determined to ruin it. Should I ditch my day, or ditch these vacuous women?
‘Why don’t I go with you, Bianca?’ Lisa turned to me. ‘You don’t mind if I go, do you? We’ll only be about ten minutes and you can finish your breakfast in peace.’
I nodded again, torn between wishing they’d go and wondering how much this would stuff up my day. I knew only too well they were already relishing my discomfort. ‘Where will I find you?’
‘Oh, don’t worry, we’ll be back in a jiffy. Better we find you, than you come looking for us.’ Lisa assured me, turning to leave.
They clattered across the cafe in their high-heeled boots. Torn between relief and exasperation, I watched them go.
Happy they’d gone, I snagged a newspaper from the next table and settled back to my meal.
Ten minutes later I glanced at my watch and peeked outside. No sign of the others. I returned to the paper. Another ten minutes passed and I folded the newspaper, frowning. Where were they? I sat for a couple of minutes fiddling with my teaspoon, glaring through the window. Twenty minutes or so wasn’t a lot of time if the others were trying on clothes, but this was my shopping day, too. And the day had only just started.
Ten more minutes passed. Now I was really hacked off. Lisa had promised only last night not to hold me up, and here I was waiting for her. Why on earth did I agree to this? I vacillated for another five minutes, my body tensing until I was taut as a bowstring. Pulling out my phone I called Lisa’s number, only to hear it go to message bank. I left a terse message and hung up. It was now forty minutes. Mightily pissed off, I grabbed my handbag and stalked up to the counter to pay the bill.
‘Gone and disappeared, have they?’ the waitress said, eyes sympathetic.
‘I’m not really sure.’ Lips tight with anger, I added, ‘do you reckon forty minutes is too long to wait for them?’
‘Gawd,’ she said, ‘I wouldn’t bother. Give them some of their own treatment and leave them to wonder where you got to. Then you can do what you want to do. That’d be me, anyways.’ She shrugged with casual indifference.
‘I might just do that. I didn’t even see which way they went.’
A heavyset woman joined me at the counter, clutching her bill. ‘You looking for them two bimbos?’
My mouth curved into an involuntary smile. ‘That about describes them, yes.’
‘Well, they just got on a bus heading uptown,’ she announced with evident satisfaction. ‘Left you in the lurch they have.’ She thrust a five-pound note at the waitress.
‘What? Oh, you must mean someone else.’ I wasn’t ready to believe this.
‘Well, love, they were sitting with you when I came in and I don’t think my eyesight’s too bad.’ She pointed at her glasses. ‘New glasses last week, see? No, it was them alright, given you the bum’s rush, they have.’
With that she turned and left, leaving me standing there, tears pricking my eyes.
‘Never mind, pet. Go and enjoy your day without them.’ The waitress smiled, eyes world-weary.
I shrugged. ‘You know what, I think I will. Little fuckers.’
‘That’s the spirit.’
‘Thanks, the food was great. I guess I pay for their coffee.’ I left a generous tip and stepped outside. I gave one last searching look both left and right, just in case they turned up. But with no-one in sight, I headed up the street and caught the tube to Piccadilly. I sat and stewed, wondering why they’d dumped me without a word.
Tucked behind the newspaper, I’d missed their exodus. That would have disappointed them. They’d still be laughing at me, but they hadn’t had the added humiliation of hoping I’d chase after them. Bitches!
With a final shrug, I banished them from my mind, pulled out my phone and switched it off. Sod them.
I didn’t enjoy my day. They’d succeeded in spoiling my fun and laughing at my expense. I had no idea why. Lisa lost all my respect. Somehow, I didn’t think she’d care. Bianca didn’t give a shit about my opinion of her.
Later that day, loaded down with gifts, I caught the train home, hoping I didn’t run into the backstabbing liars. My luck held and I travelled home in peace.
Eddie was home, engrossed in a newspaper on a sofa. My stomach sank. A spurt of disappointment confused me. Had we grown so far apart I was happier on my own? Dismayed, I greeted him with more enthusiasm than usual.
‘What’s all this about?’ He pulled back from our kiss with a smile.
‘Maybe I missed you,’ I said, forcing a light tone and a bright smile.
‘I’ve been busy while you were out.’ His eyes slid away from mine, ignoring my implied invitation.
‘Not too busy to be ready for me, I hope.’ This time I was more blatant.
He ducked his head and I held my breath. Was he about to spurn my clumsy hints?
‘No, of course not.’ He smiled as brightly as me, but I didn’t miss the hesitation.
Determined, I pushed on. ‘In that case, I want you upstairs and naked in five minutes.’ I pulled him to his feet and moved in for a serious kiss. He responded slowly at first, then his body hardened against mine and he pushed me onto the sofa.
We didn’t make it upstairs, making full use of the rug in front of the gas heater, afterwards lying entwined for a few precious minutes.
‘How was your day?’ he asked, drawing lazy circles on my back.
‘Not bad. Although, it started out a bit weird.’
‘How so?’
I gave him the whole sorry saga. Somewhere in the story his hand slipped off my back and I sensed his withdrawal.
‘You mean you dumped them and went shopping on your own?’
‘Um, no. The boot’s on the other foot, Eddie,’ I said, voice sharp. ‘They dumped me. And before they did that, they deliberately excluded me from some sordid secret about Bianca’s affair with a married man.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous.’
I rolled away from him, yanking my jumper over my embarrassing extra weight. ‘It’s not ridiculous. She told me herself. I asked if there were any children and she said she was only too happy not to be a stepmum, so she believes he’s going to leave his wife for her.’
Eyes like gimlets, he asked, ‘What else did she say?’
‘Why do want to know? Does it make you realize she’s not the changed person you insist she is?’
He shook his head, distracted. ‘No, that’s not what I meant. I mean, did she say it’s anyone we know?’
I shrugged, not interested in where this was going, especially as our lovemaking – the first time in weeks – had just taken a backseat.
‘No, she was cagey about him.’ I wished I hadn’t told him. ‘Maybe we know someone who knows them, but she wasn’t saying. She said his wife was boring in bed, a useless lump of lead. That’s pretty cruel, I think.’
It was his turn to shrug. ‘She was probably joking around. You know what she’s like.’ He scrambled to his feet. ‘I’m going to shower and watch telly, what about you?’
‘I’ll have a long soak in the bath after you’ve showered. Had you planned anything for dinner?’ Intimacy had come to an abrupt end, my voice came out flat. Stung by his sudden disengagement, I retreated inside myself.
‘Sorry, love, I thought you’d have eaten a huge lunch with the girls and would only want toast for supper.’
‘Well, that didn’t happen.’ I tried not to snap. His lack of interest stung. ‘I got dumped, so I ate on the fly between shops, and I’m starving. What are you going to eat? Maybe we could share.’
Uncomfortable, he shifted his feet and edged to the door. ‘I ate before you got home.’
I shot him a filthy look. Before I could bite his head off about never eating together, I gathered my shopping bags and headed upstairs, feeling ill-treated and unloved. He didn’t follow me. He could miss his damned shower. I didn’t care.
In the bath my mind lo
oped in circles over the why of it all, when I wasn’t gnawing on that, I turned in endless circles about the obvious secret they’d giggled and snorted over, gloating on leaving me out, followed by thoughts of Eddie’s total lack of interest.
As the bath water cooled, instead of wallowing in self-pity, I made a decision there and then: I was through with Bianca. Lisa, too. One person treating me like dirt in my teens was shame on her, two people perpetuating the insults in our twenties was shame on me. Toweling myself dry, I determined to excise them from my life, like a scalpel cutting out cancer. No matter what.
Chapter Eleven
After that, with Christmas imminent, I managed to avoid the evil pair. I didn’t say another word to Eddie about my hideous shopping trip. He was on another planet entirely, and he’d made it clear he didn’t support my side of the story. Staying under the radar kept me from saying anything I’d regret.
Shona and Martin flew out to Australia a few days before Christmas. They wouldn’t return until the end of February. Brigid had scored ten days off work, and flown with her parents, siblings and their partners, plus a niece and nephew to Canada for a white Christmas.
With friends gone, Friday night hangout would have been a nightmare. I stayed home. Eddie went, of course, leaving me to reflect on how different my life had become from a year ago, when Eddie couldn’t bear to be apart from me.
Christmas was depressing. With my husband’s defection from time together, I’d been at a loss when it came to a gift. Most nights, during his absence at the gym over the three months I’d worked at the doctors’ surgery, I’d knitted a dark green jumper for him. But when I stitched it together it seemed worthless, a waste of time. A year ago he’d have loved it. Now, I couldn’t guess. And I didn’t care.
Most of Christmas Day was spent with his family. His two older brothers regarded me with the sort of condescension bestowed on unimportant people. After nosy and insulting inquiries regarding plans for children, they ignored me. Eddie had become the only family member to have a university degree, and was granted deference from everyone. My nursing degree was ignored. In their opinion, I had nothing to say.
Promises Made- Promises Kept Page 15
