by Joan Jonker
Malcolm smoothed his Brylcreemed hair, put on his Clark Gable smile and entered the fray. He was shaking hands with the more mature guests when he saw Jill and Doreen come through from the kitchen and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. Blimey, he thought, we’ve got three smashers here! Then he saw Steve, tall, dark and handsome, follow the girls and his hopes were dashed. He was wondering which one of the blondes with the film-star looks belonged to him, when Steve put his arm around Jill’s waist and pulled her close. Well, Malcolm consoled himself, that still left two pretty, unattached girls. All was not yet lost.
‘Come on, son, open yer presents,’ Molly said. ‘I can’t wait to see what yer’ve got.’
Rosie waited patiently while Tommy unwrapped each present, bypassing hers in what seemed like a deliberate move. Ties, socks, gloves, carpet slippers, hankies and cufflinks. Each present was greeted with oohs and aahs, much to the delight of Tommy who held each one up for inspection. Then came the moment when there was only Rosie’s left to open. He tore the paper off, looked at the picture on the front of the book and let out a loud ‘Yippee!’ His face agog, he turned the pages. ‘This is just what I wanted! Oh, the gear!’
Rosie let out a long, silent sigh. At last she’d done something that pleased him. She didn’t expect him to single her out to thank, not when so many people had given him presents, but the delight on his face was satisfaction enough. Her present was definitely his favourite.
Malcolm was looking for a way to get near Rosie, but she had planted herself firmly between Bridie and Bob on the couch and the expression on her face said she was staying put. So until the opportunity arose, he decided to while away the time by turning his charm on Doreen. It was with amusement that Doreen listened to Malcolm bragging about his dancing skills. She’d had him taped from the minute she’d set eyes on him. With his plastered hair, false smile and affected man-of-the-world air of nonchalance, he really fancied himself as a heartbreaker. As he rambled on about his prowess on the dance floor, Doreen’s eye caught the two photographs standing on the mantelpiece. They’d been taken at Jerome’s in London Road, when Phil was home on his first leave and they’d gone into town with Jill and Steve. They’d ordered three copies of the photographs so Nellie and Molly could have one each, and Molly had been so proud of her daughters and their boyfriends she’d had them framed and given them pride of place over the fireplace.
Doreen reached up and took down the one of her and Phil. ‘This is my boyfriend, an’ if yer think you can dance, yer want to see him.’
Fighting back his disappointment, Malcolm feigned interest. ‘It’s a good photograph. Where is he tonight?’
‘Somewhere overseas.’ Satisfied that she’d put a damper on his interest, Doreen put the photograph back. ‘He’s in the army.’
‘Oh.’ Malcolm started to move away. It was no good wasting his time on someone who was spoken for. ‘I’d better go over to Tommy; after all, it is his party.’
Tommy and Ginger were bent over the sideboard, turning the pages of the new book. But even though his head was filled with the pictures of the different German aircraft, Tommy still managed to keep tabs on Malcolm. If his workmate caused any trouble he’d clock him one. But when he saw Doreen giving him a polite brush-off, he knew he needn’t concern himself over her. And as for Jill, if Malcolm was soft enough to try and chat her up, he’d be asking for trouble because Steve would punch him so hard he wouldn’t know what hit him.
‘Don’t forget yer owe me a tanner.’ Tommy couldn’t help the hint of sarcasm in his voice. ‘Yer’ve no need to pay me tonight, I’ll wait until next pay day.’
‘I wouldn’t bank on it,’ Malcolm said. ‘The night’s only young.’ He let his eyes wander round the room, thinking this wasn’t his idea of a party. ‘It will liven up, won’t it?’
Tommy grinned. ‘Just wait until the drink starts to take effect.’
‘Yeah,’ Ginger chortled, ‘keep yer eyes on Mrs McDonough, she’s the one who starts the fun.’
‘Is she the big fat one?’
Tommy counted to ten. Keeping his voice even, he said, ‘The big fat one, as you call her, happens to be my auntie Nellie, an’ I think she’s a smashin’ woman, so just watch it.’
Ginger looked from one to the other. He’d never seen Tommy lose his temper before and hoped it wasn’t going to come to fisticuffs. Mind you, Malcolm was so vain he would rub anyone up the wrong way. And he was out of order, what he said about Mrs McDonough. Like Tommy said, she was a smashing woman and the world would be a happier place if more people were like her. Always the life and soul of a party, she was.
Then, as if on cue, Nellie’s raucous laughter filled the room. ‘Did yer hear that, girl? I offered to sing a song an’ my feller wants to know how much I’ll take to keep me mouth shut.’
‘Nellie, we’d all have a whip-round to pay yer not to sing! I’ve told yer, the hooters on the ships in the Mersey have more tune to them than you have.’
‘Charming, that is!’ Nellie put on her woebegone face. ‘Well if someone else sings, I’m goin’ to hum along with them whether yez like it or not. If a ruddy bee can hum, then so can I.’
‘Sure, Auntie Bridget will give us a song, won’t you?’ Rosie pulled on Bridie’s arm. ‘Aren’t yer singin’ all the time at home?’
‘No sweetheart.’ Bridie tugged her arm free. ‘Perhaps a bit later.’
‘Oh, come on, Ma,’ Molly coaxed. ‘Someone’s got to start the ball rollin’ an’ you’re the only one with a decent voice.’
‘Oh, no I’m not!’ Bridie smiled. ‘Rosie has a beautiful voice.’
‘Then we’ll sing a duet, that’s what we’ll do.’ Rosie jumped up and reached for Bridie’s hands. ‘Yer’ll have to stand, Auntie Bridget, ’cos I can’t sing sittin’ down.’
Reluctantly, Bridie allowed herself to be pulled up. ‘Just the one song, that’s all.’ Then she whispered in Rosie’s ear and before they began to sing, they joined hands.
‘I’ll take you home again, Kathleen, across the ocean wide and wild,
To where your heart has ever been, since first you were my bonny bride.’
Bridie had a sweet clear voice, but Rosie’s was stronger and filled the room. After a while Bridie stopped singing, and, wiping a tear from her eye, listened to the song that she loved so much but which always reminded her of home and made her sad.
And Bridie wasn’t the only one affected. The haunting words, sung in a voice as clear as a bell, were playing on everyone’s heartstrings.
‘And when the fields are fresh and green, I will take you to your home, Kathleen.’ Rosie finished on a high note, unaware that everyone listening had a lump in their throat and a tear in their eye.
‘That was lovely, sweetheart.’ Bridie kissed a pink cheek. ‘Thank you so much.’
There was a round of applause and even Tommy was shouting for an encore. But Nellie didn’t like feeling sad at a party, so after she’d sniffed hard and wiped the back of her hand across her nose, she said, ‘Can’t we have somethin’ lively? I don’t want to spend the night cryin’ in me beer.’
Steve put his hand on his mam’s shoulder and showed his dimples when he grinned down at her. ‘Mam, ye’re not drinkin’ beer.’
‘I know I’m not, soft lad! But if I was, then I’d be cryin’ into it.’
‘Is it somethin’ lively yer want, then, Auntie Nellie?’ Rosie grinned. ‘Sure don’t I know the very thing to liven yer all up? But yer’ll have to move yer legs out of the way ’cos I can’t sing this without me feet tapping, and that’s the truth of it.’
When a space had been cleared in front of the fireplace, Rosie straightened her shoulders and stood as stiff as a ramrod. Under her breath she counted ‘One, two, three,’ then began to sing.
‘Have yer heard of Phil the fluter from the town of Ballymuck
Times were getting harder – the man was nearly broke.’
Rosie’s legs and feet moved rapidly as she performed an Irish jig in
time with her singing. The steps were intricate and fast-moving, but her feet and voice never faltered. And when Bridie started to clap, everyone in the room joined in. Even Malcolm dropped his pose to clap and stamp his feet. What a girl! He couldn’t let this one get away.
The dancing stopped and Rosie held her arms wide as the song came to an end. ‘Oh, hadn’t we the gaiety … at Phil the fluter’s ball.’ The rafters rang with cheers and applause.
‘Oh, sunshine, that was absolutely marvellous,’ Molly said. ‘How the hell yer managed it I’ll never know ’cos I was breathin’ for yer.’
‘The sweat’s pourin’ off me, an’ I was only watchin’!’ Nellie wiped a hand across her forehead. ‘Now, can I do me party piece?’
Molly groaned. ‘Oh, no, Nellie, please?’
Jack leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He winked at Molly. ‘Have yer got any cotton wool, love, to shove in me ears?’
‘Ay, we’ll have less of that off you, Jack Bennett!’ There was a stiff expression on Nellie’s chubby face. ‘At least I’m willin’ to have a go, which is more than can be said for you, or my feller.’
‘Go on, Mam,’ Tommy egged. ‘Let Auntie Nellie sing.’
There was a roar of approval from Steve, Jill, Doreen and Ginger. ‘Yeah, let her have a go.’
Nellie tilted her head back and looked down her nose at Molly. ‘Yer see, girl, I’m in great demand. The trouble with you is, yer taste is in yer backside.’
‘I wish me ears were in me backside, then I wouldn’t have to listen to yer.’ Molly pretended to sigh. ‘OK, go on, get it over with.’
Nellie left her chair and elbowed Rosie to one side. ‘Make way for the main attraction, girl! Don’t yer know I’m top of the bill? An’ like all the best singers, I like to stand when I’m performing.’ She placed the palm of one hand over the other and held them in front of her mountainous bosom. ‘Now can we have a bit of hush please, ’cos the least noise will spoil me concentration.’ She nodded her head knowingly at Molly. ‘When Joseph Locke sings, yer can hear a pin drop.’
‘Nellie, with the best will in the world, Joseph Locke you ain’t! Now will yer get on with it before the people in the gallery start throwing squashed tomatoes at yer?’
‘Ooh, hark at her! Don’t cry, girl, there’s no need to get out of yer pram, I’ll pick yer dummy up!’ After pulling tongues at her friend, Nellie put her hand to her mouth and coughed softly. Then she fluttered her eyelashes, gazed at the ceiling and opened her mouth.
‘Auntie Mary, had a canary, up the leg of her drawers …’
George leapt from the chair, his hand leading the way to cover his wife’s mouth. ‘That’s enough, Nellie, behave yerself.’
Nellie pulled away from him. ‘Spoilsport!’ She flicked an imaginary speck off her dress. ‘The trouble with you is, yer’ve got no appreciation of good music.’ Her chubby face creased as she smiled sweetly. ‘Seein’ as me husband didn’t like my previous song, I’ll sing yer me speciality.’
George pulled a face before sitting down and holding his head in his hands. ‘God help us.’
Nellie couldn’t start for laughing. After all, she knew what was coming. Then, getting her feelings firmly under control, she placed a hand on each of her ample hips and struck up a pose.
‘Oh, Frankie and Johnny were sweethearts, oh, lordy how they did love,
They swore to be true to each other, just as true as the stars above,
He was her man, he wouldn’t do her wrong.
Now Frankie went down to the corner, to get her a bucket of beer,
She said, Mr Bartender, has my lovin’ Johnny been here?
He is my man, he wouldn’t do me wrong.’
With her wide hips swaying and mimicking the sultry voice of Mae West, Nellie cut such a comical figure everyone in the room was in stitches. Even George had his hankie out wiping the tears from his eyes. And Nellie was thoroughly enjoying her moment of fame. She winked at Molly before changing her stance and her voice to become the bartender.
‘I don’t want to cause yer no trouble, don’t want to tell yer no lie,
But I saw yer lover about an hour ago, makin’ love to Nellie Bligh,
He is your man, but he was doin’ yer wrong.’
Nellie didn’t have the nipped-in waist of the famous Mae West – in fact Nellie didn’t have a waist at all! But her swaying hips, the sultry voice and the trademark curling lip were spot on. To all those people crowded into the tiny living room of the two-up two-down terrace house, it was as good as sitting in the best specks at the Liverpool Empire.
She finished to thunderous, rafter-raising applause and foot-stamping, and she loved it. With her hand on her tummy, she bowed to the four corners of the room, giving a delighted Miss Clegg a special wink. Then she held up her hand for silence. ‘Now for my grand finale.’
George was wiping his red-rimmed eyes when Nellie swayed towards him in slow motion. With her hands on her hips and her eyes narrowed, she spoke out of the side of her mouth. ‘Why don’t yer come up and see me sometime, big boy?’
‘Behave yerself, Nellie.’ George could appreciate his wife when he was one of the crowd, but not when she put him in the spotlight.
‘D’yer know what?’ Nellie stood in front of him, shaking her head. ‘I bet if Mae West herself walked in, yer wouldn’t turn a ruddy hair!’
‘Take no notice of him, sunshine, we all thought yer were great.’ Molly rubbed her aching ribs. ‘Yer best performance to date, I’d say. We’ll see yer name up in lights yet.’
‘Yeah, an’ when I’ve made it big I’ll remember who me best mates are, so watch it. When me name’s up outside a big London theatre in flashing bulbs, only me very best friends will get complimentary tickets to come and see me.’
‘Nellie, there’s no lights flashin’ anywhere these days, so why don’t yer settle for the Metropole in Stanley Road? It’s only tuppence on the tram from here.’ Molly pursed her lips. ‘Trouble is, yer can’t get rotten eggs for love nor money, so we’d have nowt to throw at yer.’
Never lost for an answer, Nellie jerked her thumb at Jack. ‘Yer can throw your feller at me! They say a change is as good as a rest. An’ I might find out the secret of that smile yer sometimes have on yer face first thing in the morning. I’ve often wondered about that smile, girl! Perhaps Jack knows somethin’ my feller doesn’t.’
Molly noticed Ruthie sitting cross-legged on the floor, her eyes watching and her ears listening. If Nellie wasn’t shut up now, as sure as eggs she’d come out with something that shouldn’t be said in front of the young ones. ‘Now there’s a lull in the proceedings, I think we’ll have somethin’ to eat.’ Molly pushed herself up from her chair. ‘Then our Ruthie can go to bed: it’s way past her bedtime.’
‘Shall I give yer a hand, Auntie Molly?’ Rosie was still standing in front of the fireplace. ‘As me mammy always says, many hands make light work.’
‘Your mammy doesn’t know my back kitchen, sunshine! Get three people in there an’ yer can’t move.’ Molly gave her a smile. ‘Thanks for the offer, but Jill an’ Doreen have got everythin’ organized.’
Miss Clegg was deep in conversation with Bridie and Bob, and Steve was listening to his father and Jack exchanging views on the worsening situation in Europe. This left Rosie on her own, and gave Malcolm the opportunity he’d been waiting for. ‘Have yer tanner ready,’ he said with a smirk before sauntering over to Rosie.
‘I really enjoyed yer singin’ and dancing.’
‘Thank you!’ Rosie said with a smile. ‘Sure it’s kind of yer to say so, and I’m pleased yer got pleasure out of it.’
Ginger prodded Tommy in the ribs. ‘Yer shouldn’t leave Rosie on her own with that smarmy so-and-so.’
‘She seems to be enjoyin’ his company, she’s got a smile on her face,’ Tommy said. ‘Anyway, she’s got a tongue in her head, she can tell him to scram if she wants to.’
‘I’m surprised at her, I thought she had more sense than to
fall for his patter.’ He suddenly straightened up. ‘She’s certainly not smilin’ now, Tommy! In fact she doesn’t look very happy at all.’
Tommy looked over to see Rosie looking red in the face and not in a happy frame of mind. If it was up to him he’d let her get on with it. She usually said what she thought and to hell with the consequences, so why was she putting up with Malcolm’s shenanigans?
Tommy sighed. If his workmate upset Rosie he’d get it in the neck off his nan, so he’d better see what was going on. He walked up and stood behind Malcolm, just close enough to hear what was being said.
‘Go on, change yer mind,’ Malcolm said. ‘We can go to the pictures one night an’ I’ll show yer a good time.’
Behind his back, Tommy was shaking his head and mouthing, ‘Say no!’
‘It’s kind of yer to ask, Malcolm, and I’d not like yer to think I didn’t appreciate it.’ Rosie’s eyes never flickered. ‘But yer see, I already have a boyfriend.’
Malcolm was taken aback. ‘Tommy never said yer had a boyfriend!’ Then he smiled. ‘You’re pullin’ me leg.’
‘Now why would I be doin’ a thing like that?’ Rosie didn’t return his smile. ‘Tommy Bennett doesn’t know yet that I’ve got a boyfriend, and I’ll not be tellin’ him until I’m good and ready.’
Tommy walked back to Ginger. ‘She’s put him in his place – I’ll be gettin’ me tanner off him.’ But he was puzzled. She had sounded dead serious about having a boyfriend, but how could she when she was round here every night making a nuisance of herself? Perhaps it was someone she’d met at work and hadn’t told his nan yet. Yeah, that was probably it. Anyway, it had nowt to do with him, she was free to do as she chose. One thing Tommy was sure of, when Malcolm went out of that door tonight he’d never get back in again. He wasn’t to be trusted where women were concerned. Not that Rosie was a woman, but to be fair, with her birthday in three weeks, she was as near to being a woman as he was a man.
