by Marilyn Lee
“No, I didn’t know that. Your Auntie Deb didn’t tell me.”
“She doesn’t know. Daddy said it was going to be a secret for me, RP and him, but I thought you’d want to know.”
“Not if he doesn’t want me to,” she said bleakly.
“Daddy says we have to be nice to her until she’s gone, but it’s really hard because she’s so useless. She can’t cook and she makes us wash our hands before we touch her and she doesn’t like cuddling and kissing us like you do.”
“She’s too pretty to get dirty,” she said, working hard to be fair. “And who wouldn’t like cuddling with you and RP?”
“She wouldn’t! And anyway, we don’t much like cuddling with her either. And besides,” Ria went on as if proving her point, “Auntie Deb is prettier. And you’re younger and much nicer.” She looked up into Annalise’s face. “Do you think Daddy’s old?”
“Oh, no, sweetie. Your daddy’s the perfect age.”
“That’s what I told Daddy!” she said smugly.
Annalise bit back the urge to ask if Ria and Reed had been discussing a possible relationship between Reed and herself. “Well you told him right,” she said.
“I knew I did. You’re not like her always trying to chase us away so you can have Daddy to yourself. And when we peek in the living room, there she is, trying to kiss Daddy. Only he doesn’t let her anymore.”
The picture Ria’s words conjured up was too much. Annalise bounded to her feet. “Sweetie, you know I love talking to you, but we can’t talk about your Daddy’s private life. What he does with Taylor is none of my business and you shouldn’t tell me about it.”
“Why not?”
Because she couldn’t stand to hear it. “What he does with Taylor is none of my concern,” she carefully explained.
“But I thought you’d want to know that he doesn’t let her kiss him anymore,” she said indignantly.
“I don’t.”
“But how are you going to get Daddy away from her if you don’t know what she’s doing? If you don’t hurry up, she might win him back even though he doesn’t love her!”
Maybe he didn’t love Taylor, but he’d never said anything about loving Annalise either. “Ria, you have to trust him to do the right thing for you and RP. He loves you both very much.”
“I know that!”
“Good.” She ruffled Ria’s hair. “Now, how about we get down to some serious skating?”
“Okay.” Ria giggled and took off toward the rink. Annalise followed more slowly.
“Where are you?”
Reed looked down at Taylor, who sat on the living room sofa next to him. “I’m right here with you.”
“Physically? Maybe, but what about the rest of you? Your mind, for instance. Where’s that?”
“Here too.”
She smiled and laid her head against his shoulder.
He barely resisted the urge to draw away from her.
“This is nice, but how long can it last?”
“What do you mean?”
“I keep expecting Maria and RP to come charging in any moment. Where are they?”
“In Philly.”
She tensed beside him. “With Deb and Dave, I hope.”
“They’re with Annalise.”
She pulled away from him. “Why are they with that woman, Reed? I thought we agreed that they shouldn’t see her anymore.”
“You said you thought it was a bad idea for them to go on seeing her,” he countered. “I don’t agree. They’re very fond of her and she’s fond of them.”
“Is she? Is she really so fond of them or is she just fond of you?”
“Her feelings for them have nothing to do with me,” he told her coolly. “You need to understand that I have no intentions of stopping them from seeing her just to please you.”
She recoiled as if he’d attempted to strike her. “Then who would you do it for?”
“They’ve had too much misery in their lives as it is. They love her and she loves them. I’m not going to take that away from them.”
“What about my relationship with them? Since they’ve known her, we’ve drifted so far apart that sometimes it’s difficult for me to…relate to them.”
“Really? Then we have a problem, Taylor. We’re a packaged deal. Love me. Love my kids.”
Her face softened and she leaned up to kiss him. He turned his head and her lips brushed his cheek. “Oh, don’t be like that, darling. It’s just that sometimes they make it hard. RP’s nice enough, but Maria...”
He stiffened. “What about Ria?”
She shrugged. “Well, you know.”
“No. I don’t. What about Ria?”
“She’s not exactly the easiest little girl in the world to get along with, is she?”
He stared at her. He could only thank the Lord that Annalise had come along before he could marry this woman with such an obvious lack of affection for Ria.
“Oh, Reed, don’t look at me like that.”
There was no kind way of saying what he had to say. He’d already wasted too much time waiting for her to realize they were no good together. For all he knew, he might even have blown any chance he had with Annalise in the process. “I’m sorry, Taylor, but this isn’t going to work.”
She drew away from him. “What’s not going to work?”
“Our relationship. Ria and RP need and deserve a step–mom who loves them just as they are.”
“Why do I get the feeling you think I’m not right for them, Reed? Do you maybe have someone else in mind? Someone like their precious Annie?”
“She is precious to them, Taylor. She loves them. They love her.”
“And what about you, Reed? Does she love you too? And do you love her?”
When he didn’t answer, she stood up. “I guess I can take that as a yes. Oh, Reed! Why did you lie about sleeping with her?”
He stood up, extending a hand to her, anxious to make this easier for her. “I didn’t lie. We never slept together. If you still think differently, I’m not sure what exactly it is you feel for me.”
She stared at him with what he thought were the beginnings of tears in her eyes. He sighed. He was becoming a regular pro at driving women to tears.
“I felt...I feel...love. And I thought you did too. What’s changed?”
He swallowed several times. “I’ve changed. Ria and RP have changed. They need someone to love them.”
“I’ll learn to love them! I just need a little time.”
“She already loves them.”
“And does she already love you too?”
“I’m not sure what she feels.”
“But you know what you feel.”
“Yes,” he admitted. “I know what I feel.”
“I see. So if all your time spent with her was so innocent, exactly when did you fall in love with her?” She bit her lip. “So you want to be rid of me so you can be with her. Is it because she’s so much younger than I am? Does she make you feel young again?”
“Her age has nothing to do with this, Taylor. I’m sorry if I hurt you—”
“If?” She slapped his hand away. “Okay. So it’s over. Great. I’m going for good. That should make Maria a very happy little girl.”
That snide remark about Ria did it. He let her go with no feelings of guilt. He was finally free! Now if only Annalise was still willing to trust her heart to him.
Chapter Twelve
Getting on with her life was easier than Annalise had expected. True, she had an occasional sleepless night and she sometimes dreamed of Reed arriving unannounced with dozens of roses, begging her to marry him. But she didn’t sit waiting for Reed to call.
The first weekend in October, she arrived at Deb’s wedding in time to see Reed walk Deb down the aisle. Her resolve to forget Reed strengthened when she saw Taylor sitting with Ria and RP. She left right after the wedding ended and didn’t attend the reception.
Three weeks later, she met tall, dark, and handsome John
Handle when she accompanied Charlie on a visit to a sister congregation. She accepted when he called a week later to ask her out.
They met for lunch at a Center City restaurant. She wore a pair of burgundy dress pants and a matching jacket. She arrived first and sat sipping a cup of decaf until John slipped into the booth across from her.
“Hi.” He glanced at his watch. “Am I late or are you early?”
“You’re late,” she said, without consulting her watch.
“Hmm.” He nodded. “I thought as much.”
She grinned. “You know, I think I’m going to like being friends with you. You say all the right things.”
“Good. I could use a friend.”
Over lunch, he told her how losing his wife to cancer a year earlier had changed his life. “The house in Delaware held too many memories. So I packed up and came to Philadelphia.”
“Oh, John. I’m so sorry for your loss.”
“Thanks.” He sighed and shook his head. “What about you? Is there anyone special in your life besides your admirer across the room?”
“What?”
He nodded to a point just beyond her. “There’s a man at a table across the room who has been staring at you for the last five minutes. His date can’t be happy.”
She glanced over her shoulder and looked straight into Reed’s eyes. The woman seated opposite had blond hair! A sense of anger and betrayal filled her. After all his talk about giving him time to set things straight with Taylor, he was dating someone else!
“Do you know him?”
She turned back to face John. “He’s my friend’s brother.”
“That’s it? From the way he’s staring at you…here he’s comes.”
She froze, then tingled when Reed and the woman, paused by their table. She saw with dismay that this woman was even more attractive than Taylor and a lot younger.
“Annalise, this is a nice surprise.”
She gave him a cool stare. “Not for me.”
“Aren’t you going to introduce us, Annie?” John asked after an awkward silence.
She shrugged. “Sure.” She nodded in Reed’s direction. “John, this is Reed Phillips, my friend’s much older brother. Reed, this is John Handle.” She glanced at the woman at Reed’s side. “And this is...?”
“This is Rachel Smith, Annalise.” His blue eyes narrowed. “Rachel, this is Annalise Lewis.”
“Well, now that we’ve all met, don’t let us keep you two,” she said, uncaring that she was being unforgivably rude. She just wanted him to go away.
“May I call you?”
She shook her head. “I can’t think of anything you have to say that I want to hear.”
“Annalise—”
“Please, Reed…go.”
He touched the arm of the woman with him and they walked away.
Back at his office, Reed sat staring out his office window. The words of Down The Aisle echoed in his thoughts. Instead of Patti Labelle’s voice, he imagined Annalise promising they would live in bliss through the years and that she was his. So what was she doing with another man?
Jealousy warred with regret, confusion, and anger. Annalise had grown tired of waiting for him to end his relationship with Taylor. He’d ruined not only his chance of future happiness, but also Ria’s and RP’s—unless he could change her mind.
If so, he’d need to make a move quickly. He called her.
She answered it on the fifth ring, as he was about to hang up. “Hello.”
“Hi.”
“Reed…I can’t imagine why you’re calling me.”
He was going to have to fight for her. “I must be a glutton for punishment,” he said.
She laughed before sobering. “I never expected to see you cheating on your one woman.”
“Cheating? Is that why you were… I’m disappointed that you think so little of me, Annalise. Rachel is my secretary. I took her to lunch today to celebrate her second anniversary with us.”
“Oh…I guess I owe you an apology.”
“I don’t want an apology.”
“What do you want, Reed?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “I need to talk to you.”
“I don’t want to talk to you.”
“I’m not marrying Taylor.”
“So Ria told me—weeks ago.”
“And you didn’t care?”
“What do you want, Reed?”
“I was hoping I could persuade you to come visit Ria and RP this weekend. I could pick you up after work and we could drive over together in my car,” he offered.
“Ria and RP are coming to me next weekend to help with the food drive at my brother’s church. I think we should leave it at that.”
“Fine. Would John mind our having dinner tonight?”
“What makes you think I’m interested in having dinner with you?”
“When we first met you said something about wanting me to take you to a romantic dinner some starlit night. The stars will be out tonight and I’m feeling very romantic.”
“That was a long time ago.”
“Does that mean you’re no longer interested in...” he trailed off. How could he ask her if she was still in love with him without sounding like a conceited heel?
“If you’re wondering if I’m in love with you, Reed, I am now firmly in possession of my own heart again.”
That meant John didn’t have it either. So just maybe it was up for grabs. “I can pick you up at six–thirty.”
“You’re not picking me up.”
“Okay. Why don’t you meet me at the new Italian restaurant on Columbus Boulevard? I hear the food’s great.”
“Reed—”
“I’ll see you there at six–thirty,” he said and hung up before she could refuse.
He sat for several minutes, waiting for her to call back and refuse to see him. After twenty minutes, he knew they had a date.
Annalise paced her living room floor. She glanced at her watch. Six–twenty. He’d be there in ten minutes. Then what? It was one thing to tell him over the phone that she didn’t love him. Could she pull it off while looking into his too blue eyes?
She glanced at the bouquet that had arrived an hour earlier. A combination of white and yellow Gardenia’s this time. And an enigmatic, message, “To new beginnings. Reed.”
Just what was she supposed to make of that? She knew what she’d like to make of it, but she was not going down that road again. Her resolve weakened when she saw the interior of the restaurant he’d chosen with its’ dim lighting and tables in intimate recesses.
She turned to look up at him. “This is not a good idea, Reed.”
He urged her forward with a hand on her elbow. “It’s a great idea. The food is excellent here.”
She waited until they were seated and had ordered before she tried again. “That’s not what I meant. I meant the atmosphere. It’s not the sort of place friends of the opposite sex come.”
“Of course it is,” he said. “We’re here.”
“Well, we shouldn’t be. It’s the kind of place you should have taken Tay...” That’s probably what he’d done. She stared silently at him.
He stared back, shaking his head. “I’ve never been here, Annalise. And it’s over between us.”
“You took her to Deb’s wedding.”
“I didn’t take her. Deb had invited her and even though we’d ended our relationship by then, she showed up and sat next to Ria and RP. What was I supposed to do? Ask her to leave or not sit next to my kids? She didn’t attend the reception.”
If only she’d known, she could have stayed and enjoyed Deb’s special day.
“My relationship with Taylor is over, Annalise. She didn’t love my kids and they don’t love her. Ria and RP deserve a step–mother who loves them.”
“Do you…have anyone in mind?”
“Yes. You.” He reached across the table to take her hands in his. “Will you walk down the aisle with me, Annalise? Will you marry me?”
She swallowed the urge to scream a happy yes. He’d said nothing about love. “Why would I do that?”
“For the usual reason: love.”
She managed not to blush as she stared into his eyes. “I told you I’m no longer in love with you.”
“I heard you. I meant that you love Ria and RP. You do love them, don’t you?”
She nodded. “Yes, I do, but—”
“And they love you.”
“But you don’t.” She tugged her hands free and rose.
He leaned across the table and pushed her gently, but firmly back into her seat. “Do you have any idea how often you occupy my thoughts?”
She felt her heart begin that now painful thumping that left her breathless. She wasn’t going to get excited because he said she occupied his thoughts. It wasn’t his thoughts she wanted to occupy. It was his heart.
“Yeah? Well, come back and ask me when you can tell me your heart belongs to me. Maybe then I’ll consider marrying you.”
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair and she watched, remembering how silky it had felt under her fingers. “I was hoping you’d consider it now. I...was hoping to avoid a long drawn out engagement.”
She stared at him. “Why?”
He glanced away from her and ran a hand along the inside of his collar. “Well, I...it’s been over three years since Maria died and I...I’m not made of stone, Annalise. I have feelings and... needs...I really need to marry you.”
This time she felt herself blushing. “So I’m supposed to marry you quickly because you have...physical needs? Charming proposal, Reed. And so romantic.”
He brought his blue gaze back to her flushed face. “I’m sorry, but you did ask.”
“If your...needs are so pressing, I suggest that you pray and then go marry Taylor because I am not prepared to marry without love.”
He sighed. “So we have to do this the long, hard way? Okay. You want to be wooed? So okay. I’ll woo you.”
She stared at him silently. Defiantly. Why shouldn’t she want to be wooed? And loved?
He reached across the table to reclaim her hand. He stared directly into her eyes as he lifted it to his mouth and pressed his lips against her knuckles. “I’m sorry. It’s no more than you deserve and it’s what you’ll get. It’s just that...I really want to marry you. I need you.”
