by Kitty Parker
"Alright, dinner is served!" Johnathan announces with a smile from the doorway of the dining room as behind him, Annette sets the table with the bowls of homemade tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches.
And they are just all sitting down as they hear the engine of an approaching vehicle and then a minute later, there's a knock on the door. Daisy sits in her chair with her heart lodged in her throat because even though she tells herself to not get her hopes up, she can't help it. It's him. It has to be.
Johnathan gets up to answer it and Matty's on his heels and seconds later, Daisy hears Matty exclaim "Jack!" and she feels her heart stop beating completely.
…
Daisy knows Maybelle thinks she's acting casual but she's not. At all.
She gets up with a smile on her face and tells Jack to have her seat because she's left-handed and she doesn't want to keep bumping elbows with Daisy. And Maybelle's not left-handed and Daisy frowns at her because doesn't she think that Jack will notice that right away? Maybelle just smiles at her though and goes to sit on the other side of the table and Jack eases himself into the now vacated seat beside her.
Her heart is beating again, this time in little flutters in her chest.
"Happy birthday," he says to her in his low gruff tone and she gives him a small smile.
"Thank you for coming," she manages to say and she's so proud of herself for not having her voice quiver as she speaks to him.
Annette serves everyone bowls of the soup and the plate of sandwiches are passed around.
Daisy tries not to look at Jack as her daddy quickly pulls him into a conversation about the farm and the purchase of a new-used tractor. She listens as Jack agrees to take a look at it before he leaves that evening and he turns down Johnathan's offer of paying him for his services. She busies herself with making sure Matty is using his napkin and he doesn't slurp and she tries to eat her own birthday dinner even with her stomach flapping around.
She introduced Spencer to her family at Matty's birthday and though the meeting hadn't been a bad one – everyone had been perfectly nice to everyone – she still can't quite figure out why having Jack there for dinner feels so different than when Spencer was there.
Spencer is her boyfriend. Was. She's actually not too sure.
He came over the day before – leaving the office early and coming over before Matty got out of school – and he had a bouquet of flowers in his hands. No one other than her daddy had ever gotten her flowers before and he had stood there, saying how sorry he was for how the party with his colleagues had gone and that she had left, being so upset.
She felt like Rachel because she told Spencer that she needed a break for a while and even now, she's still not entirely sure what she means.
She knows she's not in love with Spencer. She likes him. He's nice to her and he likes her in return. At least, she thinks he likes her. His inability to stand up for her to his colleagues and say that she's more than just a baker certainly is a strike in the negative column.
She knows she really likes the man sitting next to her tonight for her birthday dinner. The man she invited before she could stop herself and she definitely doesn't know if Jack even likes her. He must though because he's here and he sat next to her on the stairs and told her that she's great. Too great for him. Why would he ever think she's too great for him? He's gruff – yes – and seems to have more mood swings to him than a pendulum but most of what she's seen of Jack Belton from across the hall, he's not a bad man. Not at all.
But even though that's the truth, it doesn't matter. He already has a girlfriend and she knows Carolina to be quite nice when she's not drunk. She won't call her and Carolina friends but she likes her and she's never been the sort of girl to even think of taking someone else's boyfriend as if he is a piece of property and can't make up his own mind.
He already has. Daisy kissed him and Jack showed that he would rather kiss Carolina instead.
She can't be mad at either of them just because Jack isn't attracted to her. He's here tonight and that means he likes her in a friendship sense of the word. Does he want to be friends with her? Does she want to be friends with him? She would have liked something more but that's not going to happen and the sooner she just closes the door on the thought, the better off she'll be. She'll be able to look at Jack as nothing more than a friend and she'll be able to focus completely on Spencer and figure out what she's going to do.
…
After they're all filled up on grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, Annette goes back into the kitchen and returns a moment later with the cake in her hands with four candles all lit, ready to be blown out.
"Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday dear Daisyy.
Happy birthday to you!"
They sing – Shawn loudly and purposely off-key – and Daisy smiles and laughs at it all, her cheeks warm with a blush. She loves singing herself for people but she's always felt a certain level of embarrassment when she's the center of attention like this. Her eyes float over to Jack sitting beside her and he's not singing but his lips are twitching in a smile at the scene and she smiles softly in return.
When the song ends, she pulls Matty into her lap and together, they blow out the candles.
"What did you wish for, mama?" Matty asks her.
"She can't tell us or else it won't come true," Johnathan smiles from his seat at the head of the table and Annette begins making cutting slices of cake for everyone.
"I wished for all sorts of things," Daisy tells him honestly without giving anything away.
"I thought you only got one wish," Matty frowns.
"Nope," Daisy smiles and shakes her head. "How old you're turning, that's how many birthday wishes you get to make."
Matty gasps. "I didn't know that. Grandpa!" He then whips his head to Johnathan. "You must get to make like a million wishes!"
Everyone laughs at that as Johnathan gives his grandson a frown he doesn't mean.
"Presents!" Matty then exclaims once they're all down with their plates of cake and he's going to be climbing on the walls that night from too much sugar and Daisy can't help but be a little relieved that they're spending the night at the farm and her parents can help her with reigning him in.
The party moves from the dining room into the living room and as if sensing his hesitation, not too sure where to go, Daisy watches Annette talk with Jack and gesture towards one of the arm chairs and he gives her a slight head nod, going to sit down.
He seems to be nervous now to her for some reason – stiff with an uneasiness he didn't have just minutes earlier as they ate at the table.
Daisy sits on the sofa with Maybelle on one side and Matty on the other and as she unwraps each present, she has Matty help her because she just can't seem to do it all on her own and she needs him to help her.
She gets clothes from her mom and Maybelle – a soft yellow cashmere sweater and a new pair of boots and a few dresses as well as a new lightweight scarf with flowers on it that she can wear in the springtime and fall. Nathaniel gets her a Friends trivia board game – which Daisy declares that they must play later that evening – and Shawn gets her a bottle of perfume, which he says that the lady at the counter was very helpful with him making a decision. Rosita gets her a new rolling pin and a collection of dessert refrigerator magnets and her daddy gets her the cookbook made of recipes seen on the Great British Bake Off.
She loves everything and is so overwhelmed with all of the presents that she doesn't even realize that she hasn't gotten anything from Matty or Jack. But that doesn't matter because Matty doesn't have to get her anything and Jack just being here is enough for her.
"Happy birthday, mama!" Matty then exclaims and pulls something out of his jeans pocket. It's a multi-colored beaded bracelet and Daisy smiles the instant she sees it. "Ms. Espinosa helped me make it yesterday during craft time!"
"I love it, Matty," Daisy smiles and she means it. She t
akes the bracelet and instantly slips it onto her wrist before grabbing Matty and hugging him tightly, kissing his head.
"One more present, Daisy," Nathaniel says, carrying one more box over to her. "And it's heavy."
Jack sits up in his chair and leans forward. "You don't gotta open that in front of everyone," he says and Daisy notes that he's looking uneasy, almost shifting nervously.
Suddenly, he looks like he wishes he was anywhere else in the world.
She hesitates. She can offer to take it home and open it when it can be just him and her and Matty instead of her whole family sitting around, watching. She has no idea what he bought and she wonders why it would make him so nervous. Nathaniel's right. It is heavy.
"Oh, don't be silly, Jack," Annette says, perched on the arm of the chair Johnathan is sitting in and speaking to Jack as if they've all known one another for years. "I want to see!"
Jack doesn't say anything to that as everyone echoes their agreement and Daisy keeps watching him. He just looks at her through his hair hanging in his face and she hesitantly rips at one of the corners. He doesn't say anything in protest and she rips the rest of the paper away. The box is from the department store in town and she lifts the lid.
She instantly gasps. "Oh my gosh…" she says and can't think of anything else to say.
He has gotten her so much. There's an apron and oven mitts and a new spatula and whisk and ladle. There's a three tier cooling rack and the most beautiful yellow ceramic muffin pan. There's a jar of cashews – how does he even know she loves cashews? – and a small box of raspberry crème chocolates. And the last thing makes tears rush into her eyes. It's a medium-sized chalkboard, edged in wood, and etched into the piece of wood at the top, Daisy's Bakery is carved.
Daisy stares at it for the longest moment and she feels as if her heart is in her throat.
"Where did you find this?" Maybelle is the one to ask, looking to Jack.
Jack shrugs then as if he's found it right down the street but Daisy knows that he hasn't.
Daisy lifts her head to look at him and he's looking at her and he's so tense, she can see it from across the space between them. Even with tears in her eyes, she smiles widely and exhales a shaky breath.
"Thank you," she manages to say and she wishes she could hug him but she doesn't want to embarrass him more than he already is.
Jack is still staring at her and he gives his head a slight nod towards her. "Happy birthday," he says in a quiet mutter and Daisy hugs the chalkboard close to her chest.
…
Jack's making himself scarce again and she has no idea why. She's knocked on his apartment door a few times to invite him to dinner but he never answers and she doesn't know if he's even home or if he is and just ignoring her.
And she should be used to this. Him being around and then disappearing but after her birthday and him coming and giving her those gifts, she just thought that things would be better. She thought that maybe things would change between them. She hates that she's so disappointed because why has she been expecting anything to be different?
The town has an area-wide arts and crafts fair at the high school every year in May and Daisy signs up for a table. She busies herself, baking cupcakes and using her new pan to make extra large ones and cooling them on her new cooling racks and on the board, she works out which ones she's going to make – deciding on chocolate peanut butter and banana cream cheese, which seem to be her most popular two.
The fair is on Saturday and Matty comes as does Maybelle and they help her set her table up and spread the cupcakes out – each one having been put in their own individual little box and on the chalkboard she has brought with her, Daisy writes down the prices. Two dollars each and four dollars for the jumbo size. She makes sure she has plenty of business cards out as well that customers can take. She hopes the summer will be busy with kids having birthday parties and pool parties for the next three months.
"Mama, can I go get something to eat?" Matty asks after an hour and even though it's only ten o'clock, the cupcakes are selling in a steady stream. She'll be sold out in a few hours.
"I'll take him," Maybelle volunteers. "You can hold down the fort for a little bit?"
"As long as you bring me back something," Daisy smiles and Maybelle smiles, too.
"Let's go, Matty," Maybelle says, holding her hand out and Matty grabs it, skipping away.
A few more customers walk by, some looking over the cupcakes but not buying as they move on, but she sells two more in the next ten minutes.
"Hey," a familiar voice greets her and she lifts her head from where she's putting the money safely away in the lock-box.
It's Spencer and she smiles when she sees him.
"Hey," she greets back. Even though it's Saturday, he's been at the office. She can tell because even though he's dressed casual in jeans and a Dartmouth sweatshirt, he still looks so put together. "I didn't think an arts-and-crafts fair would be your scene," she teases.
He smiles a little. "Heard there's a girl here selling her cupcakes at basement level prices."
She laughs at that. "Would you like one?"
"I'll take a jumbo banana," Spencer says, pulling out his wallet and as she takes the money, she hands him one of the boxers. "Keep the change," he then quickly says as she begins pulling bills out of the lock-box.
"Spencer, this is a twenty," she reminds him.
He just shakes his head. "Your cupcakes are worth more than that."
And Daisy's not sure what to say. Except with that incident regarding his colleagues at the law firm, Spencer has never been nothing but nice to her. And he doesn't go weeks ignoring her only to come back into her life for a little bit of time before disappearing again.
…
After pouring Matty a bowl of Cheerios and watching him settle on the floor in front of the television to watch his cartoons, Daisy goes into the kitchen to start brewing a small pot of coffee. Every Sunday, she and Matty go to church with her parents and then they go back to the farm for most of the day and Annette cooks a Sunday evening dinner for them all.
There's a knock on the door and Daisy sees that it's barely seven o'clock. When she peeks through the peephole, her stomach drops. It's Carolina.
"Hi, Daisy!" Carolina greets happily as soon as Daisy unlocks and opens the door.
Daisy looks at Carolina – at her tousled hair and she's only wearing underwear and large tee-shirt, clearly belonging to a man. Obviously belonging to Jack.
The back of her throat is beginning to burn.
"Hi, Carolina," she somehow manages to say.
"Do you have butter and maple syrup? I'm trying to make Jack French toast for breakfast and he has bread and eggs. No butter or syrup though. Jack said that you probably do," Carolina says, smiling and cheerful and she doesn't seem to notice Daisy's pale face.
"Um, sure," Daisy says before turning and going for her refrigerator. She takes a moment to close her eyes and take a deep breath and there's absolutely no reason to cry.
But she looks at the Daisy's Bakery chalkboard hanging on the wall and that's exactly what she wants to do. That's all she wants to do right now.
Instead, she takes the butter and syrup to Carolina still standing at the door. "Here you go."
"You are the best," Carolina smiles at her and Daisy does her best to smile a little in return.
It's not Carolina's fault. Jack doesn't belong to her and it's not like there's anything going on between her and Jack that Carolina should know about. All Carolina sees is an available handsome man, an unattached man, who likes her. Why shouldn't Carolina spend her nights with Jack?
After she shuts the door, she locks it and turns away from it. "I'm going to take a shower, Matty," Daisy says in a voice that is beginning to sound shaky to her ears.
Matty doesn't answer. He just chews his cereal and keeps watching his cartoons and Daisy hurries down the hallway into the bathroom. She barely gets the door shut and the water turned on before the first
of the tears start streaming down her cheeks.
…
Matty's getting too big and heavy to carry but the day has already not been the best one without Daisy admitting to herself that her son's growing up too fast.
After church and the farm and the chicken and dumpling dinner they ate, Matty has fallen asleep in the car on the way home and now, Daisy carries him in her arms towards the building. She sees a figure sitting on the front steps, smoking a cigarette, and when she's closer and can see clearly who is it, she wishes she could just scream.
He is the absolutely last person she wants to see.
But she wants to get inside and she has to walk past him to do that. Jack stands up when she's closer and he flicks his cigarette away. She's noticed that he always does that when she or Matty are nearby. She hates the walking contradiction this man is. He doesn't like her enough to treat her like she's more than a stranger to him but he doesn't want to give her and her son second-hand smoke?
Daisy has every intention of ignoring him.
"Need me to carry him?" Jack asks in his gruff voice but for the first time, it doesn't give her butterflies. It just makes her stomach clench and her spine stiffen.
"I got him," she answers tersely and walks right past him.
She manages to unlock the inner door and begins walking up the stairs, very aware of the fact that Jack is following behind her. She reaches her door and unlocks it, pushing it open, all doing so quietly and slowly so Matty doesn't wake up.
"Daisy."
Jack says her name and even though she yells at herself not to, she can't help but turn around towards him, looking at him, wondering what he wants.
But he doesn't say anything. He just stands there and looks as unsure now as he did when he was at her parents' house for her birthday.
His silence is just grating to her though and she can't help it. She can't take it anymore. Either he's in her life or he's not and he just can't come and go whenever he damn well pleases. She's sick of being jerked around by him.
