by Kara Hart
A few miles later we were on the highway. The tractor couldn’t go much past 20mph and I could tell Hope was angry with me. “How do you think I feel? My new bike is stranded at the steakhouse.” I said. She was doing her best to give me the silent treatment. I hated the silent treatment. “Alright. You want me to say it? I’ll say it. But it don’t change nothing. Here it is. You ready? I’m sorry. S-O-R-R-Y. I’m sorry baby, cutie pie, sweetcheeks, and beautiful…” I tried every name I had on her. Eventually she had to give in and laugh a little.
“What do you think was in that tea we drank?” she asked me.
“Hell if I know. I told you earlier. It’s probably poison.” I shrugged.
“No, I’ve seen poison. Pretty sure it kills you. This stuff just brought out the bad thoughts I had buried a long time ago. Stuff I probably should have dealt with.” She stared into the darkening desert sky.
“I didn’t see nothing.” I mumbled.
“You didn’t see anything? Nothing? It’s hard to believe, Avery. They knew what they were doing. They gave us something real; it wasn’t just in my head.”
“Let’s just drop it.” I said. There were too many memories I needed to forget. So many brothers I had watched die. Both my parents … My whole past, present, and future were fucked. So when I told her to drop it, I meant it. It wasn’t something I enjoyed talking about.
“But Avery, you said that you loved—”
“I said, drop it.” That shut her up real quick. Frankly, I didn’t mind coming off as an asshole all the time. With people like her, I kinda had to play that character. She would never understand the things I had seen, the people I called my family, nor would she be empathetic to my plight. I was as guilty as I was a pawn in the system of economics. I grew up poor and abused so I abused the world and robbed everyone in sight. Who’s gonna be sympathetic to someone like that? Ghandi? Jesus? Bullshit.
There was no love for a guy like me. It was too bad. These desert skies, as they faded to dusk, got me pretty lonely. And Hope? Well, she was a perfect creature. God spent a little extra time on her. She deserved more than I did. So I guess in that moment, I decided I would actually try and help her. Why not?
Hope
We made it back. We actually made it back. Although, I wasn’t sure what was worse: being in the presence of The Sapo Boys or hanging out with the Courage MC. Both were equally torturous for a woman like me.
We were quickly brought into the strip club, amidst half-naked women calling me ‘baby’ and ‘honey.’ “Just ignore them Avery said, shielding me inside. We walked to the back of the main room where Bruce announced we would be having a big dinner together, a celebration of sorts. Avery had settled the score and the higher ups were happy. Maybe this meant I’d get my house back.
Avery pulled the chair out for me, like a gentleman. It was odd, but ever since our little mind exploration in the desert last night, he had been treating me unusually well. He was already at the drinks; however, pouring himself full glasses of whisky and smoking cigars with Bruce. With every celebration came bad news. I knew that much. With every award ceremony came with a set of angry losers. The ‘winners’ built their own world, made of fragile glass.
He gave a toast to the members of the MC. “To business and the return to better days. Some of you remember the 90’s and the glory this crew had seen. We’re still enjoying the benefits of it, myself included. But there’s more to be had. There’s more to give to everyone, every last one of you.” Upon hearing these words, Bruce’s face seemed to contort. He looked at Angelo and rolled his eyes. They weren’t having his wealth distribution speech. The workers of the MC didn’t deserve the better fruits. They were succumbed to the scraps left on the marble table.
Bruce raised his glass in faux solidarity. “Yes. To a long life of Courage. Let’s all enjoy this night together.”
All of the men cheered and swallowed down their drink. It was a sight to see as the powers were now shifting to an uncomfortable degree. The bikers were excited of course, but what about the ones that ran the place? Were they going to give everything to Avery and his men so soon? Was it ever in their sights? These are the things a woman thinks about in moments like these.
“I want you tonight.” Avery leaned over and whispered. “I’m hard just thinking about you…”
I smiled and felt his hand caress the inner part of my thigh, underneath the table. I instantly felt my wetness soak through my cotton panties. He went further up and felt my core, only letting go because some commotion broke out near the entrance. All of a sudden, there was yelling. A man, covered in dirt and bruises came in the front and addressed everyone.
“Avery is trying to take control of the MC!” he shouted. All the heads of the table stood up and grabbed their pistols and shotguns, including Avery. “You see? They point their guns at an unarmed brother! And look where Avery is sitting? Right next to the boss with his new beautiful woman. Oh how the mighty have fallen.”
“Luke.” Avery muttered. “You shouldn’t have shown your face in here. If you have any sense in you left, you turn around and leave.”
“Is that so? Well, I guess you call the shots now, Avery. You’re the new boss right?” The crowd of bikers started whispering to each other. The room was filled with tension. Some of the men even put their guns down. I was looking for an exit, ready to run right out and never look back. “Bruce, did you sanction this?” he asked.
Bruce walked forward, arms out to his side. He had set his gun down on the table in an honorable display of truce. “I’m the boss, Luke. You know that. Now put down the damn gun and walk out that door.” He kept moving forward, as slow as he could.
“You’re the boss, huh? Well, that ain’t what you were saying a few days ago. Remember? You called me in for a secret meeting in that back room. You were there, Angelo. Same as you Avery. Remind me again, what was the topic of that meeting?”
Angelo stepped forward this time. “Put the fucking gun down, hot head.” he said. It was a bit much, but tensions were escalating quickly. I looked at Avery who was holding his gun with as much aim and precision as a Marine at war with his enemy. He looked so powerful, so perfect. He was a true soldier, ready to give his life for his family at the drop of a hat. I needed him. I needed him to carry me out of this hellhole, to pick me up and pin me against his wall, and have his with me. It was all I could think about, as I slowly backed away towards the emergency exit.
“YOU!” Luke shouted. “Avery’s hot mamma. Get the fuck back over here.” His gun was aimed right at me.
“You keep aimin’ that gun at my girl and I’ll blow your head straight off.” Avery said through his coarse throat. My girl? I wanted to show him what being his girl was like. I wanted to give him everything he wanted. I wanted to be his dedicated woman. I would ride to the ends of the desert with him, wielding our guns, and fighting off any enemies that came our way. I wanted to.”
“You mean the girl you were trying to set up?” What? I looked at Avery in heartbreaking confusion.
“You don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, Luke. I’m giving you ten seconds to leave or bullets will fly into that flesh of yours. 10!” But Avery was shaking. Something had been said that shouldn’t have. There was so much I was being kept in the dark about. What the fuck is going on?
“Avery? What’s he talking about?” I whispered.
“Ain’t nothing. He’s a psychopath.” he said to me, though I could smell the lie coming straight from his mouth.
“Tell her, Avery. Tell her how you’re just using her to get to Bobby Farole. That you used her to fix The Sapo Boys deal. And now you’re gonna use her to be the figurehead for you, the ideal biker wife. Look, she’s already wearing that dress you bought the last woman.” Luke said, giving us a sinister smile.
“Avery, I…” I nearly fell to my knees from the pain. How could he do this to me? He used me. He took me in when I was vulnerable and made me agree to do his bidding in exchange for my life back. But h
e wasn’t going to give me that. No one could but myself. All he had was his gun and a gang of derelicts and drunks. I turned and ran out of the building, promising myself I wouldn’t stop for anyone. This was it. It was time to come back to my senses. I loved the bad boys, but it was no life for me.
Goodbye, Avery. We had our fun. Now it’s time for me to leave and figure things out. I called Jack. “Hope?!” he cried out into the receiver. “Is that you?”
“It’s me, Jack. And I need help.” Tears were streaming down my eyes. I could hardly even breathe. How could he have done this to me?
“I saw the headlines. Are you really with that biker? Hope, you need to get out of there. That guy is bad news. He’s been in prison three different times now. People think he’s killed people.” If Jack only knew the truth. He’s probably killed more than a few people. He’s in the god damn Courage MC.
“Yeah, I know. That’s why I’m calling. I need a car to take me somewhere.” I whispered, running along the side of the road. I looked behind me to check if anyone had followed. Nothing. In the distance I heard a gun shot.
“What was that?” Jack screamed. “Hope?!”
“Just send the damn car!” I shouted, finding cover behind a large bush. It wasn’t the best of hiding places, but it was something.
“Alright. Send me your address. I’ll get you here safely.” he said.
“I’m not going to your house.” I calmly stated. “I need to go somewhere much further.”
“Hope, where are you going? You need to tell me. I’m your manager.”
“Were my manager. I’m going to Kansas. I’m going to see my sister.” I hung up the phone and sent him the address, heart beating directly against my bones. This was going to be a long couple of days…
Avery
I can’t believe the bitch left me. She left me with a gun to my face. As the exit doors swung shut, Luke’s revolver pointed straight at me. Looking down the barrel of a gun is like staring into an infinite void. Your life: past, present, and future, shines before you, as the cycle of life and death continues all around the desolate shores of our universe, speeding fast into motion. What you see is the eye of your creator. And once that trigger is pulled, it winks at you and whispers, “BOO!”
If there was one thing I hated most, it was looking into that void. Realizing the finality of everything was never my strong suit. Those who did weren’t fit to walk a day in our shoes. They were normal individuals, complete with families, homes, dogs, and happiness. Sure, I wanted all of those things. But the way of the bullet was how I lived. Bang. You’re born into this world. Bang. You hit your target and fly back home. I was a soldier of the road. I was a soldier…
Luke’s gun went off in a flash and time slowed down. Angelo dove under the table, Bruce was cackling to himself like he always did, realizing the trivialities of life, while the rest of the men opened fire. I could see the flames of passionate rage flash within Luke’s eyes. He was aiming right for me. The bullet was a straight line connecting us to Hell.
I jumped out of the way, feeling the power of the bullet whiz by my left eye. I wasn’t done yet. This wasn’t over. The bullet hit the back wall, right through a picture of Bruce’s niece. By the time, we could figure out what was going on, Luke was out the door, speeding off on his motorcycle. Bruce grabbed his shotgun and ran steadily out the door. “Son of a bitch.” he muttered. He pulled down that trigger as Luke sped away. Two shots. One ricocheted off a rock in the distance, while the other seemed to spray his shoulder. Luke wobbled, but managed to stay on his bike, though I could tell Bruce got him good.
He turned around and addressed the men. “He’ll be back.” He said, shaking and out of breath. We slowly walked back inside.
“Well, this is a celebration, boys. A celebration of all out fucking war.”
“War?” Angelo called out. “Boss. It’s one guy. And he was one of our own. What are you talking about a war for?” The men’s voices in the club echoed off of the walls. Everyone was in a disagreement with each other. Conflict was rising in the ranks. This wasn’t good. God dammit, Luke. I could barely think. We had grown up together. We were best friends in grade school. We took the world by storm. And now he was my enemy.
“I said it’s a god damn war!” Bruce screamed, punching his fist clean through the table. “Get your guns. We’re attacking anyone who stands in our way. Avery, suit up.”
“Boss, I don’t think this is a good idea. Remember the 90’s? Remember what killed the golden era for us? We can’t afford another war, not now. Tensions are too high. We’ve got a lot of money on the table, a lot of people waiting to get their product.” I said.
Angelo backed me up. “Once news of our talks of war hits the streets, there’s no telling what will happen. All production will get cut off from us. The distribution channels will want nothing to do with the Courage MC. Our name will be tainted for years, even decades. Bruce. I’m begging you. We find Luke, but that’s all we aim for. Maybe Bobby Farole when the time comes, but our efforts need to be focused on Luke.” Angelo knew better than anyone. He bit the bullet head on.
“I said suit up. Anyone who disagrees with me will get dishonorably discharged, leaving in shame and humiliation. You will no longer be a brother to anyone here. You will have to pack up and leave. Because if one of my soldiers catches you, he’ll shoot you dead cold. You hear me, people?!”
Sullen shouts were heard around the room. The support was divided, that was for sure. This wasn’t going to end well. I knew that much. When disagreements turn ugly, the people turned to bickering and inner struggle, often resulting in the destruction of the civilization around them. It was no different in the MC. Governments ran the world. We ran the streets. And the president of the United Streets of Courage Town just declared total war on anyone who disagreed with him. I couldn’t stand by it. I just couldn’t.
Bruce turned to me and spit at the floor. “You find that girl.” He said. You find her and you bring her to me. She’s going to get Luke, Bobby Farole, and whoever else deviates from the wisdom of our leaders. You got that? You’re in charge.” He slapped my back and walked outside, hopping on his bike. Who knew where in the hell the man was headed to?
“Hey, Avery!” Someone in the back shouted. “You got my vote.” He said.
“Who said that?” I called out, amidst the cigarette and gunpowder smoke. “Who the fuck said that?”
The man walked forward with a cigarette sitting against his lips, pistol holstered around his waist. He was a heavy set man with a heavy walk. And I knew just who the hell I was looking at. He took off his hat and smiled. “When are the elections?” He asked me.
“Bobby Farole…” I whispered.
“Damn straight son. Good to see you’re still standing. Just wanted to pop in and give my respects. But I guess things ain’t so great around here no more. Too bad. Things are great back home, with the old Darkhorse MC.” The men aimed their guns at him, ready to fire.
“Let me know when I can shoot this son of a bitch!” One of them yelled.
“Put your guns down.” I called out.
“That’s right, boys. I’m unarmed, ‘cept for the pistol on my waist. I come in peace. You know, Avery. We could use a leader like you. Stop in sometime.” He smiled and threw his cigarette onto the floor, stomping it out with his heavy black boots. He tilted his hat at the men and said, “Boys.” And with that, he walked out of the building.
I remained silent for a good minute or two, thinking about what all just happened. I needed to come up with a plan, and fast. I needed to find Hope. “I’m not your boss.” I said to those who were still even listening. “I can’t tell you what to do. I can’t tell you to go to war or give you the authorization to shoot an unarmed enemy. I don’t have that authority. My suggestion to all of you, is that you get the idea of me being boss out of your head. We listen to Bruce. No one else.”
The men cheered and shot off their guns in the air. To them, this was fun. This was somet
hing they had been waiting for, ever since they got their first motorcycle, MC emblem, and gun. They didn’t care what happened. They were just here for the action. I knew things had changed. The days of our young crew were over. The days of respect had been lost. It was wartime and my leader was an enraged tyrant. We were all so doomed…
Hope. I had to find her. I just had to.
Hope
I made my way to Kansas in search of someone who had left me long ago. My sister, the only one who had my back growing up. Of course, all that changed once our father died and our mother became a recluse. Slowly, our little happy family melted away into nothing. Jealousies occurred, misunderstandings built up into blackened curses, and the house was shut and boarded up for good.
Yet, here I was, standing in front of her new apartment building with Jack. We asked around and this where everyone said she lived. Only problem was that her new ‘roommate’ was a drug-fueled psychopath from out west. I was told he used to deal meth. Used to, until he figured out it was more fun to smoke the stuff.
“Are you sure about this?” Jack asked me, rubbing my shoulders.
“Yeah. I’m sure. I need a fresh start. I need my family back.” I said.
“Well, it’s about time. I’m right behind you if you need me.”
“Thanks.” I took one step further and felt my body shiver. This was going to be harder than expected. But I saw something the other night when we were with The Sapo Boys. Somewhere in that nightmarish tea, my sister revealed herself to me, telling me this is where I needed to go. Her being there simply pushed me in the right direction. I rang the doorbell and held my breath.
The door slid open about a half inch, connected by the chain inside. “Who’s there? What do you want?” A woman’s face peered out to look at us. She was probably around 28 years old, and yet she looked around 40. It was terrible what hard drugs could do to your body, just terrible. “Sammy? Is that you?” I asked, hesitating a bit to reveal myself.
