Here And Now (American Valor 2)

by Cheryl Etchison

  “What do you know about my father?”

  “That he’s about as worthless and lazy as a man can get. Why are you asking?”

  “I don’t mean your father. I mean my father. Mom just admitted she had an affair.”

  His eyes widened in surprise. “With who?”

  “I thought you might know. She said he promised to take you all away, except he left and never came back.”

  “Holy shit.” David rose to his feet and scrubbed a hand over his face. “I’m gonna need a drink for this,” he said, immediately heading back into the kitchen.

  She sat on his sofa, listening to the cabinets and refrigerator opening and closing, to the clink of ice in a glass. He returned a few minutes later with two very large glasses of what appeared to be Scotch and water. After handing her one, he took a fortifying drink, then collapsed into the sofa next to her. Already having an achy feeling in her head and her stomach, she placed her glass on the coffee table.

  “I remember there was a guy that kept coming around for a time.” David rested his head on the back of the couch and stared up at the ceiling as he spoke. “I think he might have taken us all to a carnival in Sherman. Adam probably remembers better than I do. But I remember him coming around quite a bit for a while.”

  “Where was Dad at this time?”

  “Where Dad always was. Who knows?”

  “Do you remember what he looked like? His name? Anything?”

  David shook his head. “Nothing more than a vague recollection, really. He drove a huge pickup truck. A crew cab dually.”

  Rachel nearly laughed, despite it not really being funny. “You remember his truck but nothing else about the man?”

  “He used to take us out into an empty pasture and cut donuts in that beast. It was really fun, especially since Dad never did anything like that or had a truck like that. When you’re in first grade that’s the kind of stupid stuff that makes a lasting memory, I guess.”

  “You didn’t think it was odd Dad wasn’t around when Mom ended up pregnant?”

  “Come on.” David rolled his eyes. “What did either Adam or I know about the birds and the bees back then?” He chuckled and bumped her shoulder with his. “I mean, I know I’m the smartest kid in the family, but cut me a little slack here.”

  She offered a halfhearted smile that soon faded and segued into several minutes of silence.

  “Did you ask Mom for a name? I have people that can track him down for you.”

  Rachel shook her head, disgusted with herself. “I didn’t even think to ask. The room started spinning and I couldn’t breathe. I had to get out of there.”

  “How about this?” he said, patting her knee. “Why don’t you stay here for the weekend?”

  “I didn’t bring any clothes or anything.”

  “Don’t worry about that. I’m sure you can borrow something from Stacie. We’ll call Adam to see what he remembers, then I’ll call Mom and see if I can get some answers out of her.” Her brother gave another pat to her knee as he rose to his feet, then disappeared down the hallway to his bedroom.

  In a matter of hours, her life had gone topsy-turvy, no way of knowing which way was up or down. While she didn’t want to impose on David’s family, she didn’t really want to go home either. After all, what would she do there? Sit in her bean bag chair and wonder if what her mother said was right? That men didn’t keep promises to women like them?

  As long as she stayed here, she could focus her energy on finding out what she could about her father. Where he lived. Why he never came back. Whether or not she had other half brothers and sisters out there in the world.

  At this point, it would be a very welcome distraction from spending another day wondering whether or not Lucky would be coming home soon or if he was gone for good.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  SINCE IT WAS Sunday and Bull didn’t have any physical therapy or other treatments scheduled for the day, he and Lucky headed out to one of the many rec centers on the Walter Reed campus. This one, however, was specifically for single military. While it was nice the hospital had made so many spaces family friendly, sometimes guys wanted to be guys. They wanted to be loud and obnoxious and swear at the television without worrying about offending someone’s delicate sensibilities.

  Just as the broadcast began, Lucky’s phone rang and a number with the Durant area code appeared on the screen. It wasn’t Rachel’s number, or his dad’s, or Brenda’s. So he sent it to voice mail instead. He looked up from his phone when the National Anthem began to play on the big-screen TV as part of the Sunday Night Football pregame ceremonies. He and Bull along with the rest of those in the room sat in rapt silence as a majestic bald eagle was released from the upper deck of the stadium. As the anthem continued to play, the bird filled the frame, its wings spread wide, soaring around the stadium until it finally landed on its handler’s glove. Right on cue, the crowd went wild, the anthem ended, and the network cut to commercial.

  “I have to say that is fucking fantastic,” Bull said with his drier than dry tone. “Because nothing says freedom like a captive bird.”

  And of course Lucky laughed. It was nice to see that despite all the shit he was going through at the moment—the recovery, the divorce—Bull had somehow managed to hang on to his sense of humor.

  His phone buzzed in his pocket, indicating a voice mail had been left. Since the game hadn’t yet started, he decided to dial in.

  “Hey, Lucky. It’s Dottie. I just wanted to check in on Rachel to see if everything’s okay. I tried her phone a couple of times but it went straight to voice mail. Anyhoo . . . if there’s anything I can do, don’t hesitate to call.”

  Lucky immediately rose from his chair and headed into the hall where it would be easier to hear. He dialed Rachel’s number first, and just like Dottie had said, his call went straight to voice mail. Just as it had done the night before. And the night before that. Immediately he dialed the most recent unknown number on his touch screen.

  “Hey, sugar,” came Dottie’s voice on the phone. “How are things?”

  “You tell me. I’ve been in Maryland for the past week and haven’t spoken to Rachel since Thursday.” He didn’t dare add that he ignored her phone call on Friday.

  “Well, I don’t really know what’s going on. She called in to work Friday afternoon, said she would be out the weekend due to a family emergency. Aside from that, no one really knows anything.”

  “Is she expected in tonight?”

  “Not as far as I know.”

  Shit. He looked at his watch and calculated what time he’d arrive in Durant if he left now. And the answer was not soon enough.

  “Thanks for giving me a call, Dottie. I appreciate it.”

  “You heading back?”

  “Just as soon as I can.”

  After promising to call or text her just so she’d know he made it back to Durant all right, he ended the call and went back into the rec room where Bull had been keeping watch from a distance.

  “Everything okay?” Bull asked.

  “Not sure. But I gotta get back to Oklahoma.”

  “Your girl?”

  Lucky nodded.

  “Well, I would say the smart thing to do would be wait until the morning before heading out, but if it were me in your situation, nothing would stop me from getting home.”

  “You got that right. If I leave now and drive straight through, the earliest I’ll be there is tomorrow afternoon.”

  “Well . . . I hope you don’t mind if I don’t get up to see you off.” They both laughed and Bull held out his hand, which Lucky grasped before he leaned down for a farewell hug. After a few seconds and a few final thumps to the back, they let go of each other. “Go take care of your girl instead of babysitting me.”

  “Tell your mom I said goodbye.”

  Bull smiled. “Absolu
tely. Now get the hell out of here.”

  Lucky ran from the building to the visitor parking lot and within thirty minutes he’d checked out of the hotel and was heading west on the 495. If it had been any other weekend, he would’ve called his dad and asked him to go by her place and check on her. Unfortunately for him, Duke and Brenda had gone to Kansas City for the weekend and they wouldn’t be back until the following night. As a matter of fact, if Lucky could keep the hammer down and not run into any problems, he could beat them home.

  Fueled on copious amounts of caffeine and fear, Lucky drove straight through the night. In Nashville, he ran into some bad weather. A little hail, some heavy rains, but thankfully no sleet or snow. He kept his phone on the charger and volume cranked up in the event Rachel called because each time he tried her it was more of the same. Straight to voice mail.

  The rest of the time he kept trying to puzzle out what Dottie told him. The fact Rachel had taken off work due to a family emergency. It couldn’t possibly be her mom or dad, because if that was the case, they’d most likely have been brought into the ER. So it had to be someone out of town, which meant she could be damn near anywhere in the country since her remaining siblings had scattered to the four winds.

  Somewhere around the Mississippi River he’d convinced himself she’d likely lost her phone or she’d killed it somehow and was waiting on a replacement. Either way, the moment he got back in to town, he was going to get Walter’s number in case of future emergencies.

  A little after five, just as the sun was setting, Lucky arrived in Durant and found himself equal parts relieved and angry when he saw her truck parked out in front of her trailer. Forgetting the chocolates and other gifts in the car, he raced up the steps to her front door. He yanked open the storm door and, in true Rachel fashion, the damn front door was unlocked and he walked right on in.

  The first thing he noticed was the new Christmas tree and that the light over the kitchen sink she always left on at night wasn’t on. Which meant her whole place was shrouded in darkness. He flipped on the entryway light and made his way to her bedroom, fearful of what he might find. In the dim indirect light from her bathroom, he could see her curled up on the bed, facing away from the door. He didn’t know if she was sick or hungover or just dog-assed tired. But if she were sleeping soundly, he’d probably scare the shit out of her if he tried to gently wake her. If he yelled at her, he’d scare the shit out of her. Either way, it was a lose-lose situation.

  “Rachel, sweetheart?” She stirred only a bit, so he tried again. “Rachel!”

  She shot up in the bed, gasping for breath, her eyes unfocused, her hair wild. He rushed to her bedside. “Hey, Shortcake. It’s me. I’m home.”

  The moment her eyes focused on him, she threw her arms around his neck and clung to him as if her life depended upon it. Lucky pulled her into his lap and held her as tight as he could, not wanting to ever let her go.

  IN THE MORNING he opened up her blackout curtains, letting in the bright early morning sun for two reasons: one, so he could get a better look at her since her bedroom lacked an overhead light, and two, so it would hopefully keep her awake long enough that he could get some answers. Within a matter of minutes she woke, climbed out of bed to use the bathroom, and returned just as quickly. That was it. Nothing to drink. Nothing to eat. Obviously if they were going to have any kind of conversation, he would have to be lying down nose to nose with her.

  So he climbed back into her bed and pushed the hair off her face. “Dottie called me. Said you had some kind of family emergency. Want to tell me what’s going on?”

  In the light he could see how dull her eyes were, how they lacked their normal everyday brightness. Her lids were swollen and dark circles shadowed beneath. Her skin was pale, including her lips, which were closer to white around the edges than their normal rosy pink.

  She swallowed hard, like she knew it would be a struggle to speak. “I tried calling you Friday.”

  “I know. I was in the middle of something at that moment.” He continued smoothing his hand over her hair, carefully raking his fingers through her tangled strands. “I called you back that evening and it went straight to voice mail. And I’ve called a bunch of other times since.”

  Her eyes drifted shut as she gave her head a gentle shake. “My phone died when I was at David’s and I didn’t have a charger.”

  “You went to your brother’s house? Was that the emergency?”

  “There wasn’t an emergency.”

  She drew in a deep breath as if she was about to fall back to sleep, but he couldn’t let that happen. He needed to know what was going on with her, because this woman he was talking to was not the same woman he left just nine days before.

  “Rach, I’m sorry, but I’m not following.” He brushed his thumb across the apple of her cheek. “Can you please just tell me what’s going on? Because I drove twenty hours straight to get to you and I don’t want to play twenty questions.”

  When her eyes opened this time, he saw the tears in them.

  “It would seem my dad is not my dad.”

  “What?” If this came out of left field for him, he could only imagine how she must be feeling.

  “I was talking to my mom about you and the next thing I know she’s telling me that the man who I thought was my dad isn’t.” For the first time as she spoke, her eyes truly focused on his. “And I was so upset I just drove and ended up at your house and that’s when I called you.”

  Lucky swore under his breath. “I’m so, so sorry that I didn’t answer. If I had known—”

  “Then, all of a sudden, I couldn’t breathe. And I just had to get away from here.”

  “That’s when you went to David’s?”

  Rachel nodded.

  “Did he know about all of this?”

  She closed her eyes and shook her head. “No. He’s trying to help me find him though. But I wasn’t feeling well so he suggested I stay the weekend. By the time I came home on Sunday I felt terrible and all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and never leave.”

  A couple of tears spilled over onto her cheek and Lucky quickly brushed them away with his hand.

  “I don’t even know why I’m crying. After all I’ve put up with from him . . .”

  That same anger he felt at Ethan’s funeral all those years ago rose to the surface. This time, however, he wouldn’t let her suffer all alone. Lucky pulled her into his arms; her head rested on his chested, snuggled beneath his chin. “I’m sorry, Shortcake.”

  He held her for a long time and she was so still he believed she’d fallen back to sleep. Then her hand drifted across his chest, almost where it was tucked beneath her head. But then he realized she had placed her palm directly over his heart.

  “I missed you.”

  The sadness in her voice, the way it broke around her words, nearly did him in. “I missed you, too.”

  “I don’t want you to ever go away again.”

  Oh, God. He needed to tell her sooner rather than later. But it felt like he would be piling on to her misery if he told her now.

  She must have sensed his tension because she moved back to her earlier spot in the bed and looked at him, that little crease appearing between her brows. “What is it?”

  He ran his palm over her shoulder and down her arm, back and forth, over and over, wanting to soothe her as much for his own sake as it was hers. “Bull and I spent a lot of time talking about what makes me happy. How what seems like a good idea at the time might turn out to be a really bad one. So the better decision might be to go with what I know for sure makes me happy. Then I went to get some lunch near the hotel and ended up talking to a couple of guys who were recruiters.”

  “You reenlisted,” she said matter-of-factly.

  Lucky nodded. “I did.”

  Using what little strength she had, Rachel pushed herself further away from
him as she tried to escape his reach, when he wanted nothing more than to drag her back into his arms and give her that minuscule amount of peace she seemed to have only minutes earlier.

  “How long?”

  “How long is my contract?”

  Rachel shook her head. “No. How long before you leave?”

  Right then he knew his answer would be the final blow before he even delivered it.

  “I have to report to Fort Benning in three weeks.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  FOR THE TWO whole days he’d been back, Rachel stayed in bed. She hardly ate, her skin was pale. She was literally wasting away before his eyes. And to know he played a part in this was killing him.

  He wanted to fix things so badly, but he just didn’t know how. If he stayed here, it’d just be more of the same. Hating college classes. Not having a job or any real sense of purpose. He’d be miserable. And in the long run he’d make her miserable as well.

  Not that long ago he thought he had two years to show her there was more to life than this small town. Then he went and blew that timeline straight to hell. Now, he had a little over two weeks before he reported to Fort Benning. Two weeks to convince her she could have the life she wanted beyond the city limits. Two weeks to convince her they were meant to spend a lifetime together.

  But first he needed to get her up and out of bed. And if he really wanted to push the envelope, he’d get her out of the house, too. Even if it was just for an hour or two.

  Lucky sat down on the edge of her bed, brushed those fiery strands from her pale cheek. Her eyes drifted open and the look she gave him nearly killed him. Those eyes that were usually so bright and full of sparkle were dull, glassy.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Not the best.”

  He pressed a kiss to her forehead to check her temperature, caressed her cheek with his hand. “I don’t think you have a fever. Why don’t you get up, take a shower, and then we’ll go to my place.”

  “Why?” she groaned.