“Because you’ll be more comfortable there.”
She rolled over so she was facing away from him. “You mean you’ll be more comfortable there.”
“We’ll both be more comfortable there.” As he threw the covers back she immediately pulled a pillow over her head. “Come on, Shortcake. I’ll get the shower running for you.”
Lucky went into the bathroom and turned the water to hot. He pulled a fresh towel out of the cabinet and set it on the counter. As he stepped out of the bathroom, he was happy to see she was climbing out of bed. But his heart dropped when she stumbled a little as she went to stand. Immediately he was by her side, steadying her with one hand and wrapping an arm around her waist. “Tell me what’s going on?”
“Just a little dizzy. That’s all.”
“Because you need to eat.” She hadn’t had more than a few crackers here and there since he’d returned from Maryland. And considering the state he found her in, there was no telling how long it had been since she’d had a real meal.
He guided her to the bathroom, helped her undress and step over the side of the tub. She’d barely pulled the shower curtain closed when he stripped off his own clothes and followed her in.
Rachel only turned halfway around, her arms and hands strategically placed so they covered her front. As if he hadn’t spent an ample amount of time in the past month worshiping all those bits and pieces she now hid from view. “Taking your job a little too seriously, don’t you think?”
“Says the woman who nearly fell down only a few minutes ago.” He backed her into the warm spray of water so it soaked her hair. “The last thing I need is to be hauling you into the ER after you’ve passed out in the shower and cracked open your head.”
There weren’t any further protests from her as he worked the shampoo into her long red strands, his fingers easing through tangles and massaging her scalp. If anything, she relaxed more into his touch.
“Where did you learn this kind of bedside manner?” she asked as he rinsed her hair. “Is this one of those differences in military versus civilian medical training you’re always talking about?”
Lucky smiled at her jab because it showed there was a little spunk left in her even though she wasn’t feeling well.
When they were done, he dried her off and combed her hair, going as far as using a hair dryer for the first time in his life. Afterward, she pulled on plain black yoga pants and an oversize sweatshirt she’d stolen from his closet weeks before. Within the hour, they were headed across town to do a little grocery shopping at Walmart.
Lucky could tell Rachel wasn’t thrilled about the idea, but he hoped something would set her stomach to rumbling. Steaks. Popcorn. Donuts. He didn’t really care what she ate, only that she ate something. Once they arrived, he decided to forego the shopping cart for a small basket so he could keep one arm around her waist. “What sounds good?”
“I’m not really hungry.”
“I know that, sweetheart, but you need to eat.”
“I’m sure it’s just a bug. It’ll pass in a few days.”
At the front of the store he grabbed a few honeycrisp apples because those were her favorite along with some blueberry muffins from the bakery. Then they added a few cans of chicken noodle soup. He offered to make her soup from scratch, but she didn’t want him to make a fuss and said she preferred the canned kind anyway.
They continued wandering through the store at a snail’s pace, up one aisle and down another, until they reached the meat department. He was on the verge of suggesting spaghetti and meatballs when Rachel covered her mouth and raced off toward the back of the store. It was the fastest he’d seen her move since he’d returned, so her darting off took him by surprise. He rushed to catch up with her just outside the bathrooms.
“Are you going to be sick?”
She’d stopped to take a deep breath and shook her head. “I think I’m okay now. It was just the smell of raw meat.”
“That bad, huh?”
Rachel looked up at him then, her skin even paler than before. She only nodded, like answering took too much energy. Then, without any prompting, she closed the space between them, leaning heavily against him as she rested her head on his shoulder. They remained that way for a minute or so, his hand drifting up and down her spine as she took slow, measured breaths.
“Have you been nauseous a lot lately?”
“Just the past few days. It comes and goes.”
He eased away from her, cupping her cheek with his hand so he could look in her eyes. “Should we get a pregnancy test?”
Her eyes widened in panic. “But I took the Plan B. You watched me take it.”
“I’m not suggesting you didn’t.” Lucky smiled at her, hoping to put her at ease, while he tucked a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. “But come on, Shortcake. Accidents happen. And you know as well as I do that nothing is a hundred percent.”
AS RACHEL MADE her way across the store to the pharmacy area, she was counting the days in her head. A month had passed since that afternoon she and Lucky had sex on his couch. And that little revelation meant she was definitely late. She should have paid better attention, but the craziness of the last two weeks had distracted her.
Finally, she reached the aisle filled with feminine products and, more importantly, pregnancy tests. Lucky had wanted to come with her, but she worried about drawing unnecessary attention to themselves. If she went down that aisle by herself and someone she knew saw her, they wouldn’t think anything of it. But if someone from the hospital saw the two of them go down that aisle together, the gossip would be racing like wildfire.
Even as she stood there staring at boxes, each proclaiming to be the earliest detector or most accurate, she knew she didn’t need a damn test. She already knew what the result would be. Not because the possibility of being pregnant had crossed her mind until Lucky suggested it. No, it was because in her entire life she’d never caught a break.
Despite being a relatively good person and doing her best to help others, it seemed the universe had had it out for her since, well, forever. So of course the test would be positive. Of course she’d be pregnant by a man she was not married to. A man who was leaving town in a matter of weeks.
She grabbed a box with two tests in it because false positives happened. And what she wouldn’t give for a false positive. Or a positive negative. She didn’t care which as long as the stick said she wasn’t pregnant.
“Wow. Changing tactics in order to keep a man, Rach?”
Rachel spun around to find her old friend Tamara standing there with a basket dangling from one hand and a smug grin on her face.
“You’ve said for years that you wanted to get married, have two point five kids, and the whole white picket fence thing, but I never thought you’d stoop to this level to get a man to marry you.”
Rachel’s heart pounded in her chest, her head began to throb, and the nausea was trying to make a comeback. She opened her mouth wanting to deny Tamara’s accusations, to tell her it wasn’t true. But somewhere in the back of her mind a little voice questioned if her former best friend was right.
“Are you ready to go?”
Rachel turned around to find Lucky standing there, despite the fact she’d told him to go away and let her do this on her own. But now that he was there, she couldn’t help but think the man had impeccable timing and she’d never been so glad to see anyone in her entire life.
“We haven’t met.” Tamara pushed her way past Rachel, even knocking her in the hip with the shopping basket as she extended her hand to Lucky. “I’m Tamara. I’m a friend of Rachel’s. Best friend actually.”
Rachel fought to cover her mouth, suddenly queasy from watching such a gag-worthy display.
“Lucky,” he said politely while shaking the hand Tamara offered. “Best friends, you say?”
“Oh, yes.” Tamara s
miled brightly and batted her eyelashes. “We’ve been friends since elementary school.”
Lucky looked at Rachel, then back to Tamara, who was now sporting her own shade of bottled blond. “Is that right?”
Tamara was practically twirling right there among the tampons and maxipads because she momentarily had the notice of a man as fine as Lucky.
“As a matter of fact, you and I went to school together, too. We even had an English class together once. But you sure didn’t look like this back then.” Tamara made a show of looking him up and down and that earlier nausea Rachel had felt came back with a vengeance.
With a smile he took the pregnancy test from Rachel’s hand and tossed it in the basket. “Sorry, but we need to be going,” he said, wrapping his hand around hers, bringing it to his lips to kiss the back of it as he led her away from Tamara’s presence.
But then Lucky surprised her. Stopping short at the end of the aisle, he turned back to face her former friend. “One last thing.”
“Yes?” Tamara’s eyes were bright with anticipation.
“I need to thank you for being such a great friend to Rachel. You know, for fucking her ex. In their bed. Because if you hadn’t made that sacrifice, being her best friend and all, they might still be together. So, thanks again.”
This time Rachel covered her mouth, not from nausea, but to keep from laughing right out loud. As Lucky tugged her around the corner, she caught one last glance of Tamara trying to pick her jaw up from the floor.
From there they headed straight to the checkout where, thankfully, the fifteen items or less lane was empty. “What a piece of work.” Lucky placed their items on the conveyor belt and pulled his wallet from his pocket. “What did she say to you?”
“I don’t really remember,” she lied.
“Well, whatever it was, it mustn’t have been nice. I thought you were pale earlier. It didn’t hold a candle to when I found you standing there with that—” Lucky stopped himself, choosing to shake his head in disgust rather than say what he was really thinking.
God, he was cute. And polite. And so damn nice.
She loved how he let her fight her own battles, but always had her back. That he was always there, quick to step in and fight on her behalf if she needed him to. She loved so many things about him. Really, she loved everything about him.
After paying, he handed her a chilled bottle of ginger ale. “Drink some of this if you can.”
She raised up on her toes and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” he said, probably thinking she was talking about the soda.
Then he grabbed the plastic bags in one hand, placed the other at the curve of her back, and walked her out to his Jeep.
The soda helped settle her stomach and by the time they reached his place she’d even managed to choke down a couple more saltine crackers he’d taken from her place and stashed in a Ziploc bag. But despite feeling a bit better, the guilt was still eating her up inside.
What if what Tamara said held some truth? Had she risked getting pregnant intentionally?
When they arrived at his house, Lucky grabbed the food and the small duffel she’d packed earlier. After dropping her bag in his bedroom, he placed the grocery bags on the kitchen island and dug through them until he found what he was looking for.
“No time like the present,” he said, handing her the pink and white box. “And since it’s a two-pack you might as well do both tests just to make sure.”
Rachel looked into those dark brown eyes as she took the box from his hand. She couldn’t get a read on him. Calm, cool, and collected Lucky had returned, and while a part of her was dying to know what he was thinking at the moment, the other part felt like she’d be asking for trouble if she asked. He wasn’t smiling, but he didn’t look upset either. If this had happened with any of the other guys she’d dated, they’d all be ranting and raving right now, telling her that in no way were they gonna marry her. Hell, they would’ve packed their stuff and hightailed it out the door by now. Or they would’ve taken her things and tossed them on the front lawn.
Once again, Lucky was proving he was different from all the rest.
She looked down at the box she held in her hands. “I need you to know that I didn’t plan for this to—”
Without warning, his mouth covered hers, effectively silencing her with a searing kiss. His hands moved to her face, holding her in place as his tongue stroked hers. She clutched the front of his shirt in her fist, holding on for dear life until his lips softened and they eased to a finish.
“Now then.” Taking hold of her shoulders, he spun her around until she faced the hall to the bathroom and gave a little swat on her butt. “Go pee on some sticks, Shortcake. I’m gonna make spaghetti.”
Rachel stepped into the bathroom and flipped on the overhead fluorescent light. She stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, at the puffy lids and dark circles that shadowed her eyes. At the hair hanging loose from the messy knot on top of her head and her paler than pale skin. It was safe to say she looked the way she felt.
And yet when she narrowed her focus to her lips that were rosy and swollen from his kiss, she felt beautiful. The same way she always felt when Lucky looked at her.
She took care to follow the instructions since that was the number one reason why most pregnancy tests gave the incorrect results. After setting the plastic wands on the back of the toilet, she washed her hands and headed into the kitchen. Just as she expected, he was standing there at the ready, cell phone in hand.
“How long?” he asked, his finger hovering over the timer app.
“No less than three. No more than ten.”
“Seven minutes, it is, then,” he said, keying the numbers into his phone. “Why don’t you go sit down in the living room? Watch some TV. I’ve got things under control here.”
She wandered into the living room and grabbed a throw blanket from the back of the couch before settling into one corner. It took a minute or two before she realized she was sitting in the same place where their lives changed in a matter of minutes.
It wasn’t as if her birth control had failed that day since she wasn’t taking any at the time. She’d stopped taking her birth control pills months before so she wouldn’t have sex with Curtis. By stopping the pills, she effectively cut him off since he refused to wear a condom. Then, even after she moved out, she didn’t bother to refill her prescription, telling herself it was a way to prevent herself from falling straight into bed with the next guy that came along.
Only that reasoning didn’t work either.
When she closed her eyes and thought back to that afternoon, all she could see was the pain on Lucky’s face, hear the anguish in his voice. How he clung to her as if his life depended upon it.
Her whole life, that’s what she’d been desperately seeking. Not someone who wanted her. People always wanted and wished for things and after a time they’d tire of whatever or whomever it was only to discard them. Throw them away like yesterday’s trash.
She never needed to be wanted. She’d wanted to be needed. And on that day, Lucky had needed her.
His footsteps pounded on the floors as he made his way through the house. Next thing she knew, he was standing there in the doorway, test sticks in hand.
Rachel pulled the blanket up to her chin. “It hasn’t been seven minutes.”
“So I shortchanged it a bit by a couple of minutes.”
“It’s positive, isn’t it?” One corner of his mouth lifted as he nodded. “And the other one?” she asked even though she knew what his answer was going to be.
“Same as the first.”
She buried her face in her hands as her whole world fell apart.
This was her fault. She did this.
He was drunk and distraught and not thinking clearly. And she took advantage. And now . . .
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This was all her fault.
He settled on the couch next to her and she immediately shot to her feet. “I need to go lie down.”
“You don’t want to talk about this?”
“I can’t. Not yet.”
She raced from the living room, not wanting to see the look on his face.
“What about dinner?” he called after her.
“Not hungry.”
She closed the bedroom door behind her and climbed into his bed, clutching his pillow tight in her arms.
What was she going to do now? She could barely take care of herself, let alone a baby. And to do it all on her own? She didn’t even own a couch. How on earth was she going to afford a baby?
Several hours later, with her pillow now damp with her tears, she heard him turn off the TV, lock the doors, and switch off the lights as he made his way through the house. When the low creak of the bedroom door announced his arrival, she feigned sleep, because she wasn’t ready to hear what he had to say.
The covers lifted and the bed dipped as he climbed in beside her. Even though he whispered her name, she didn’t open her eyes, didn’t move the slightest bit. He waited a moment for a response, then curled his body around hers, wrapping a protective arm around her waist, his hand resting just inches from where their baby grew.
For now, she’d soak up his warmth and the security of his arms, because within a matter of weeks he’d be gone and this would all be over.
Chapter Twenty-Three
LUCKY COULDN’T SLEEP at all, his mind racing with the possibilities of a future with Rachel. It was selfish to think it, but their unplanned pregnancy might be just the thing to convince her to leave this small town and join him wherever the army sent him after RASP.
He couldn’t help but find it funny that what he wanted from life now was so very different than what he imagined just a few months ago. He had never completely ruled out the possibility of a wife and children, but it wasn’t a must-have in his book. And now, he couldn’t imagine a life without her and a herd of redheaded kids with bright blue eyes.
Here And Now (American Valor 2) Page 22
