by Desiree Holt
“I’m sorry.” Her face flamed, heat suffusing her skin.
Reno jumped up from his seat, agitation lining his face. “Here. Let me help you.”
She brushed away his hand, blotting at her skirt with her napkin. “Thank you. I can handle it. I’m sorry for being so clumsy.”
He stood so close to her his arm touched hers. The spicy scent of his aftershave, the heat radiating from his body, his overpowering masculinity threatened to suffocate her, and for a moment, she couldn’t catch her breath. This was not the time for arousal to take over her senses. She needed a clear head to understand this totally unexpected situation. Then he moved, and she breathed again.
“Please don’t apologize.” His voice was tight. “I know this has to be a shock to you.”
“Now there’s an understatement for you.” She waved her hand at him. “Please sit down. I’m fine.”
No, I’m not, but it won’t help if you hover over me.
She took a deep breath, steadying herself. “Reno, is this some kind of joke? If so, it’s not very funny.”
“I assure you there’s nothing humorous about it.” His voice was earnest, pleading. “And right now, it’s especially important for me to have the right person there.” He paused. “Luis Aguilar was being transferred today, the vehicle was in an accident, and he’s escaped.”
She felt the blood drain from her face. “He threatened to get his revenge on you.”
“I remember. I already have Nick arranging for a more sophisticated security system. But I need someone with Molly who knows how to protect her. And you fit the bill.”
Sarah didn’t know what to say. She loved her job as it was, but the chance to care for a child, as well as use her skills to protect her…for the first time in a long time she really felt necessary. Valued.
Sarah, you don’t get married to be a bodyguard.
She swallowed a laugh, but she couldn’t ignore how appealing the idea was.
“How exactly would this work? I mean, I have a job now as you well know, and I like financial independence.”
Reno nodded. “Understood. I hope it wouldn’t offend you if I said I’d continue your salary, the only thing that would change are your job responsibilities.”
She sat back in her chair. “A salary. To be your wife. And bodyguard and mother to your child.”
He nodded. “I have a child who needs permanence in her life. I can’t give it to her. I can’t tell you why, so you’ll just have to accept that. I know you’ve been worried about your father and his health problems. And I’m sure he’s concerned about taking care of your mother, since he can no longer work. Besides your salary, I propose to take care of your parents financially in exchange for you serving as the child’s mother. And my hostess when I need one.”
Sarah’s pulse accelerated. Hostess. His hostess. What else would he expect?
“Again, this would be strictly a business arrangement,” Reno went on to assure her. “You could hire someone to do the cleaning and laundry. I certainly wouldn’t expect that of you. It would be nice if we could have dinner together, maybe share some time on the weekend. We do seem compatible, and we’ve known each other for five years. But that’s strictly up to you.”
“Dinner.” She tried to follow everything he said. “Weekends.”
“Yes. Sometimes, I go out to visit Nick and Lindsey at their ranch. Nick and I have known each other since our college days at UT, and we’ve been a good fit as partners in the business. You’ve probably been able to see that.”
“Yes. That’s true.” Lindsey Vanetta was a sweet-faced blonde, and she and Nick were so obviously in love the air around them nearly crackled with flames when they were in the same room.
“She’s really domesticated Nick. I think you’d enjoy spending time with them if you wanted to come along.” He shifted in his chair, nervously crossing and uncrossing his legs. “There might even be other things we find we’d enjoy doing together.”
“We’d be the same as housemates.” She couldn’t believe she was sitting here so outwardly calm, discussing this outrageous proposition. She grinned. “Except I’d also be a bodyguard.”
“Yes.” He actually smiled. “Housemates. A good description. You’d have your own room. Your entire focus would be on the child. Caregiver and bodyguard.” He shifted his gaze away. “Of course, there’d be no expectation of intimacy.”
Intimacy. The word brought her up short. If she said yes to this, they’d be living together. No going home at five o’clock. How on earth would she share a house with a man she lusted after without ever letting it show?
And what did he plan to do about sex? He wasn’t the kind to cheat on his wife, real or otherwise, with a series of discreet affairs. But he also was a man known for his strong sexuality. How would that factor into things?
“I’ll take care of the bills,” she heard him say, “but you’ll be in charge of everything else—the running of the house, normal chores and activities—those kinds of things. And the child. Especially the child. She’d be your primary focus.”
“I see.”
“We’d have an agreement so that, if it happened not to work out, you’d suffer no financial hardship.” He looked down at his hands. “I had my attorney draw up a contract just in case you agreed.”
Unexpectedly, she burst out laughing. “I can’t believe I’m actually considering this. Just out of curiosity, how many others have you interviewed?”
“No one else.” His voice was stiff. “Sarah, I didn’t mean to offend you in any way. I…”
“It’s all right. I’m just…stunned and not quite sure what to say.” She took a sip of water, trying to collect her thoughts. “Reno, I’m curious. If you’re so concerned about your daughter, why do you refer to her as ‘the child’? Why don’t you ever use her name? And why don’t you want to play any role in her care?”
Lines of misery etched his face. “Please believe me when I say I can’t tell you that. Sarah, you’ve known me for five years, and we’ve developed a comfortable relationship. I think we can take measure of each other. Can I just ask you to trust me on this and not ask any questions when I say there’s a real need here?”
The amount of pain in his words shocked her. What kind of tragedy had he faced that he couldn’t deal with a tiny child?
“But how can I make such a life-changing decision without all the facts in place? And why me?” That was the real question. “Surely there must be others you’d consider. I’d think you could have your pick of a dozen women. A hundred.”
“You overestimate my present market value.” A tight smile twisted his lips. “Especially these days. In any event, they would demand a commitment from me that I’m unwilling to make.”
“Ah.” Understanding dawned. “The intimacy issue.”
“Among other things. Considering the trouble my libido has gotten me into, I’m pretty sure I could live without sex for the rest of my life.”
She burst out laughing but immediately swallowed her laughter. This was not a time for it.
“I just find it strange,” she said, “that you’re willing to live in a celibate relationship.”
“Believe me.” Now his voice was bitter. “Celibacy has its virtues. I want a situation that won’t be complicated by sex.”
Sarah’s eyes widened and her hands tightened on her napkin. “I beg your pardon?”
“Sarah, please don’t take this the wrong way, but that’s one of the reason’s you’re the ideal candidate. Sex is something we won’t have to deal with.”
She didn’t know whether to be angry or laugh at him. “Have I just been insulted?”
“No.” He shook his head. “Not at all. In fact, you might consider it a compliment.”
“If you say so.” How ironic.
“I have to have someone I trust to do this. And I trust you, Sarah. Implicitly. I’m convinced you’re the person who could make this work. And of course, you have skills that others would lack.”
He nodded. “Of course, if this does not work out, your job will always be ready for you.”
Oh, really? If this blew up in their faces, did he really think she could go back to work for him?
Little fingers of warning danced on her neck, but she swallowed hard and banished them. Whatever the problem was, she’d find a way around it. Who could turn away from a child? Especially when she wanted one so badly and one who might be in danger.
“I admit you’ve caught me off guard.” She wet her lips. “I don’t know what to say.”
“I’m sorry if this has upset you. I never meant—”
“No, please, it’s all right. I think I’m just feeling a bit hysterical at the moment.” She sipped at her water again, buying time to think. “You said I’d have full control in all matters where your child is concerned, right?” That was the key here. The heart of the matter. Whatever his problem with his daughter, she wanted to have no misunderstanding about her role. The child was the main attraction for her here.
“Totally.” He was emphatic.
“And how much time do I have to think about this?”
“I wish I could give you as much time as possible to make your decision,” he said, shifting in his chair, “but I have…let’s say…a certain sense of urgency here. Especially with Aguilar on the loose, although I could always assign one of our agents to guard her in the interim.”
“I’m, surprised you don’t do that anyway.”
He shook his head. “I think what we’re doing will work. At least for now.” He took a deep breath. “I hate to push you this way, but do you think you could give me an answer by tomorrow?”
Sarah thought she would faint. Tomorrow! She didn’t know if she’d be able to answer him by next month or even next year. Her mind reeled. “Tomorrow. Well. I’ll do my best to manage that. Could we leave now, please?”
“Of course. I understand.” He signaled for the check. “I’m sure you have a lot of sorting out to do.”
She was silent on the drive from the restaurant, very aware of Reno’s presence next to her, his scent that filled the air in the car, his strong, lean fingers on the steering wheel. She kept stealing sideways glances at him, trying not to stare at this man whose entire meaning in her life had changed in seconds. What would it be like sitting across the table from him every day, watching the flex of muscles in his jaw and throat as he ate? Trying not to fall into the black pools of his eyes. Feeling the lingering traces of his presence when he left a room.
She was so preoccupied she barely noticed when the motion of the car stopped.
“We’re here.” His voice held a trace of amusement under the tension.
She blinked. They were parked in the driveway of her small house in northwest San Antonio. A two-story adobe structure with lots of wide windows, it was set back from the sidewalk on a tiny manicured lawn. A swing hung invitingly on the porch. She loved her tiny refuge, a little gem that she’d bought with Mike’s insurance money. It gave her a sense of permanence. Would she have to give it up, too?
“Sorry.” She shook herself. “What would I do about my house? I really don’t want to let go of it.” Her safety valve if this whole absurd situation blew up in their faces.
“Your decision. You can rent it out or just leave it empty. I’ll pay the mortgage and the taxes on it, and we’ll hire help to maintain it for you on a regular basis.”
“I’ll factor it in with everything else,” she said, a touch of irony in her voice. “I understand this is a big responsibility you’d be handing me, and in fact, I’m flattered you think of me as the ideal candidate. But I have a lot to consider right now.”
“I understand.”
She stopped him as he unfastened his seat belt and started to open his door. “Please don’t walk me to the door. I’ll see you in the morning. I will try to have an answer for you then.”
“Thank you.”
Sarah unlocked her door and stepped inside, turning to wave to Reno before closing it again. She waited until she heard Reno pull out of the driveway. Then she locked the door and leaned against it, heart racing, head throbbing. How could Reno put her in this position? What was he thinking? That she could give him an answer by tomorrow?
But she closed her eyes and thought, not only of Reno, but of the unknown child that no one seemed to want.
****
Driving away from Sarah’s house, Reno cursed himself steadily. Nick and Tony were right. He was an ignorant fool. Whatever had possessed him to bumble ahead with this stupid idea? He’d thought it so sensible until he looked at it through Sarah’s eyes. She was right. He was hiring a wife.
But worse than that was his unexpected physical reaction to her, that unfamiliar tightening in his groin when he’d suddenly looked at her for the first time. He hadn’t had sex in so long he’d almost forgotten how it felt, but he certainly hadn’t thought of it in the same breath with Sarah. He shouldn’t do it now, or he’d be in worse trouble than he already was. And she would certainly run as fast as she could in the opposite direction.
Sweat ran down his spine in rivulets and covered his face with a fine sheen, the aftereffects of nervous tension, and he suddenly felt as if he were choking. Yanking his tie loose and opening his collar, he drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
Did Sarah think he was a damned idiot? What if she turned him down? He hadn’t even allowed for that possibility.
Come on, Sarah. Say yes. You’re my only hope.
Chapter Three
The ringing of her phone brought Sarah back to reality. She pushed herself away from the door and rushed to catch it, her “Hello” coming out slightly breathless.
“Sarah?”
Oh, God, her mother. Just what she needed right now.
“Honey, are you all right?” Ellen Madison’s voice had a touch of concern.
Sarah looked at the clock. Twelve-thirty. “Mother, what are you doing up this late? You never make it past the news.” A terrible thought struck her. “Is it Daddy? Is he okay?”
“Yes, he’s fine. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Then what are you doing up so late?”
“I was worried about you. I tried you earlier several times but didn’t get any answer.”
Of course. I’m so predictable that the one night I’m out late, my parents push the panic button. You’d think I was eighteen years old. She hoped her father wasn’t worrying himself into another heart attack. His condition was bad enough as it was.
“I’m fine. I was just out for the evening.”
“Oh?” She could hear the curiosity in her mother’s voice. “Anything special?”
“Not really. Just dinner with my boss.”
Please let her leave it at that.
“You had dinner with Reno? How nice. A real night out. I’m sure you had a great time.”
Yes, Sarah the bore actually went out on a date. And Mother, you wouldn’t believe what happened.
“Yes, I did. We had a lot of…business to discuss.” That’s the understatement of the year. “How’s Dad?”
“He’s doing okay, honey.” Was that hesitation in her mother’s voice? “Everything’s fine.”
But the underlying worry about health insurance and further treatments was always there. Sarah could sense it. And she had it in her power now to put that worry to sleep.
“That’s good, Mom. But I’m very tired. How about if I call you back tomorrow? Okay?” Without waiting for an answer, she said, “Night, Mom,” and disconnected the call. Tomorrow would be soon enough to open this particular Pandora’s Box.
She popped two aspirins to ward off a threatening headache and crawled into bed, but sleep eluded her. No matter what she tried, she couldn’t make her mind a blank. The evening repeated itself over and over in her head, like a television rerun she couldn’t turn off.
The proposal tonight had rocked her, the offer coming from so fa
r out in left field she had trouble coming to terms with it. And the terms of the marriage. A hired wife and mother. How trite! If the idea weren’t so unsettling, she’d be laughing out loud.
If only she knew what secrets he hid. There had been a problem with his sudden marriage to Maggie, but neither Nick nor Tony had ever discussed it. The only time Reno had smiled in more than a year was when Molly was born. Then Maggie had died, and Reno hadn’t mentioned either her or the child since. It was more than the grieving process. A hardness and bitterness had settled over him that hadn’t been there before.
Too often, she caught a glimpse of such pain it made her want to weep. Tonight was the most outgoing she’d seen him since his marriage and the death of his wife. But of course, he had a reason for it. A plan he was following to hire her as his wife. He had obviously put his best foot forward.
She had an insane desire to giggle when she thought of yesterday’s conversation with her mother.
“I do wish you’d get out once in a while,” Ellen had said. “Solitude is only good for so long.”
“I’m fine,” Sarah had assured her. “I don’t need anyone. I don’t want anyone.”
“Well, it’s just not natural. It makes me sad to see what’s happened to you. You’re still young and beautiful, and you’re wasting your life.”
Okay, Mother. Wait until I tell you about tonight’s dinner.
I must be insane even to consider his proposal. After the tragedy of her first marriage… Could she enter into another marriage, even one of convenience, when she hadn’t yet put to rest the last one?
Again she wondered what it would be like living with Reno Sullivan. What did he eat? Watch on television? Read? Did he stay up late or go to bed early? Did he roam the house, and would she run into him if she made any nocturnal forays? Her mind drifted as she fell into a half-sleep.
****
He was standing beside the bed, wet from a shower, wearing only the towel wrapped around his lean hips…
