The memory of him breathing for her rose to the surface. She’d been so weak then, barely alive, and yet she’d felt his presence and knew she was safe. Whatever happened to her next she didn’t fear because Torr had been there with her.
Grace kissed him, wordlessly thanking him for not giving up on her, for getting her to Brenya, and for saving her life. Twice. He hadn’t sought any thanks or praise, but she swore she’d find a way to tell him properly how she felt. Later. Much later. For now, all she could manage was to cling to him while he moved inside her.
The pleasure he gave her was like a firestorm burning fast and hot. The angle of their bodies made him brush against her clit with each stroke. She barely even felt her orgasm building before it bore down on her and pushed the breath from her body.
“That’s it, honey,” whispered Torr against her cheek. “Just like that. So pretty.”
He picked up speed, which made each rippling wave slam into the next. By the time she found the strength to pull in a breath, she felt his arms tighten around her. He pulled her down and covered her mouth with his as the first pulse of semen surged within her.
The last fading remnants of her orgasm fluttered around him as he came. He held her like she was the most precious thing in the universe, and in that moment, she believed it.
Torr sagged to the ground. He eased her back onto the damp leaves, and stared into her eyes while he caught his breath. The tender sweep of his fingers over her face melted her heart even more. He was so much a part of her now, both physically and emotionally, that she knew she’d be indelibly marked by his presence.
Just as he’d said, she knew she was now his, and the knowledge both exhilarated and terrified her.
“One of these days, I’ll have you in a proper bed,” he said.
“Back at Dabyr, maybe? They had the best mattresses there.”
His finger stilled in the act of petting her. “You remember?”
She was almost afraid to say it for fear she’d forget again. “Everything. That’s what I wanted to tell you.”
“You remember us?” he asked, with such tenuous hope that it broke her heart.
How hard must it have been for him not to tell her who he was and what they’d meant to each other? And why had Brenya demanded that of him?
Some things are better left forgotten.
That had been her consistent answer, and yet Grace had no idea why the woman would say that. Sure, there had been some ugly times in Grace’s life, but they were nothing compared to the beauty of the love she shared with Torr. How could Brenya—a woman who was never wrong—be so mistaken?
Grace kissed him again, long and slow, hoping to ease his worries. “I remember us clearest of all. I remember how you saved me, how you breathed for me, how you gave me up and let me go when coming here was my only hope for survival. That couldn’t have been easy on you.”
“I love you so much. Letting her take you away to a world I couldn’t reach was the scariest thing I’ve ever done. But now here you are, safe. And mine.”
“All yours.”
He kissed her again but broke it off suddenly. “I hear something.”
Grace didn’t, but she trusted that he was right and she stayed silent.
“Go back to the village,” he whispered. “I’m going to check it out.”
She grabbed her clothes and slipped through the trees as fast and quietly as she could to warn the others of possible danger. The hiss of metal on metal sounded behind her as he drew his sword.
Chapter 28
Tori followed Grace to where she waited at the edge of the village, just inside the trees. The woman seemed to be okay, but then, what Tori had seen Torr do to Grace was nothing like what she was used to seeing back in the caves.
Grace seemed to want Torr to touch her. She seemed to enjoy it when he hurt her—although hurt wasn’t the right word. Grace didn’t seem to be suffering at all, except for one part where she cried out.
And even that didn’t seem like pain to Tori.
She was confused, off balance. The calm she’d found earlier tonight vanished, leaving her fighting her rage once again.
She stepped out where Grace could see her and asked, “Why did you let him do that?”
Grace jumped and hugged her clothes to her chest. “Tori,” she said on a relieved exhale. “What are you doing?”
“I saw you. I watched. You let him hurt you.”
“He didn’t hurt me. And you shouldn’t have watched. It was private.”
It was never private in the caves where Tori had grown up. But now that she thought about it, her sisters did the same thing—hiding their pain behind closed doors, letting their husbands touch them. “Then why did you do it in the open?”
“I didn’t plan to. It just kind of happened.” Grace’s skin glowed. A small smile widened as she spoke. She wore a strange look on her face—one Tori couldn’t quite figure out. It was almost like Grace was thinking about letting Torr near her again.
“You . . . liked it,” said Tori, unable to believe what she saw. She was used to lies, but never from Grace.
Grace blushed and smoothed her hair. “Of course I did.”
“Why?”
There was a slight pause, then a brief flash of sympathy on Grace’s face. When she spoke, it was with the patience of someone speaking to a child. “Because I love him. Because it feels good.” She pulled her tunic over her head to cover her nakedness. “You’ll understand one of these days.”
Nicholas’s scarred face flashed in Tori’s head for a second. He was one of the few men who’d dare to touch her. She’d plunged a knife into his chest, but it hadn’t killed him. He was too strong for the puny girl she’d been then to kill. She was stronger now. More skilled with weapons. Maybe she could kill him now if she tried.
Strangely, she wasn’t sure she wanted to try again.
“Torr will hurt you, Grace. He’s being nice now so you’ll let your guard down, but if you do—if you sleep—you’ll wake up in pain.”
Grace’s eyes softened with sympathy, and it was all Tori could do not to plunge her sword into one of them.
Grace was kind. Gentle. Tori had to remember she wasn’t the enemy. She was one of the people Tori needed to protect.
Don’t kill Grace, kill for her.
Tori repeated the phrase in her mind, over and over, until her hands stopped shaking. She let go of her sword and took a deep breath.
“It’s not like that,” said Grace. “Not with me and Torr. I know you lived through something so horrible that few people would have survived, but what was done to you was abnormal. That was rape. What Torr and I did is love—that’s the way it’s supposed to be.”
Love, rape, it was all the same. Grace’s words were just pretty lies. Tori had heard enough of them to know. Zillah had held her captive for years. He was the worst liar of all, making her think the pain was over—leaving her alone just long enough for her to be lulled into thinking she was safe.
Tori knew better than to think she’d ever be safe again. But as long as she was still armed and breathing, she would fight.
Don’t kill Grace, kill for her.
Next time someone tried to hurt Grace, Tori would kill them. Maybe then, if she killed enough, Zillah would stop haunting her dreams.
For now, she would slip into the forest and hunt, to quiet her hungry rage.
The village would eat well tomorrow.
• • •
“I didn’t see anything,” said Torr as he came out of the woods.
“It was Tori,” said Grace. “She saw us together. It upset her.”
He winced. “Poor kid. I’ll go talk to her.”
“No, she won’t trust you. Not that she really trusts anyone, but you being a man makes you a villain. Besides, it wouldn’t matter what you said. She’s so messed up.”
“She was sent here because she tried to kill Nicholas. Has Brenya been able to help her control her violent outbursts?”
“She’s less violent now than she was a few years ago, but she’s still a long way from being a pacifist.”
“She’ll need to go home soon. We need all the female Theronai we can find.”
“I understand, but she’s not ready yet. If you’d seen her just now . . .”
Torr hugged Grace, unable to go another second without touching her. “We’ll help her. Whatever she needs.”
“Mostly, I think she just needs time. Every night that she goes to sleep warm, safe and fed is another victory. Maybe after enough of them, she’ll find some kind of life for herself.”
“Time moves faster here than it does on Earth. That makes it a bit easier to be patient, but sooner or later, she’ll need to step up.”
“I’m sure she will. And when she does, there won’t be a force in the universe powerful enough to stop her.”
He grunted. “Yeah, well, let’s just make sure she’s nice and sane before we give her access to a giant pool of magical power.”
Grace’s body shifted. The languid feel of her leaning on him changed until she was standing firmly on her own feet. “Will you touch her before you go? Maybe see if you’re compatible?”
Amazingly, the thought hadn’t even crossed his mind. He had already touched her when she’d tried to unman him in the lake, but he hadn’t considered that she might be his match. Now that he thought about it, though, there’d been no telltale tingle, no hum from his luceria. “We’re not. The only woman I’m interested in being with is you.”
She gave him a sad smile. “That’s sweet, but we both know you have to find your mate.”
“I’ve lived a long time without one. My lifemark is healthy.” Ish. “I’ll be fine.”
Grace hid her face, but he felt her nod against his chest. “I’m going to get some sleep. Do you want to come?”
“I do, but I can’t. The stakes are too high. I need to patrol the area, but I’ll stop by before I leave. Brenya is supposed to have something ready for me by morning.”
“I understand. If you change your mind, I’m in the third hut south of Brenya’s. In a real bed.”
He lifted her chin so he could see her pretty eyes. “You are pure temptation, honey.”
She gave him a smile that didn’t go very deep, but then again, she was probably worried about Tori and about him finding a compatible woman. What she didn’t know was that he had no intention of looking for one—something he would tell her when things were a little more settled between them.
Right now he had a village to protect. Brenya’s shield was nowhere in sight, and it was well past the time she usually put it up. It wasn’t the kind of thing a person forgot, which made him wonder just how much power the woman had left in her.
He needed to find out, but there were also other things he needed to discuss with Brenya, and those were all things best left for after Grace was safely asleep.
Chapter 29
Torr rapped on the door to the hut where Brenya was staying. After a few seconds, she finally let out a faint “Come.”
He ducked inside and shut the door behind him.
Brenya sat huddled in a pile of furs. Lines visibly marked her face, and her pale skin sagged along her jaw.
“You’re not okay, are you?” he asked.
“I am as well as I must be.”
“There’s no barrier tonight to hide the village.”
“I could choose only one task tonight, and this one was more important.”
He looked at the small table in front of her. The box with the crystals sat there, along with a small pile of dull stones. They looked like all the others scattered across the ground in this area, but he could feel a subtle pulse of power radiating out from them.
“What are they?”
“The distraction I promised.”
“How do they work?”
“You will drop them in bodies of water. Each one will create the energy of a Sanguinar stepping into direct sunlight.”
“How is that going to help?”
“The Solarc hates their kind most of all. He watches for them constantly, peering through suns for signs of them so he can send his Wardens to destroy them. The presence of two suns here blinds him, but the closest Warden will be drawn to it—summoned.”
“What if it doesn’t want to go?”
“Wardens have no wishes, no will. They are empty instruments of destruction that live only to obey the Solarc’s command.”
“So I toss one of these in water, and poof, instant Warden?”
She nodded. “You must wait until the Masons’ job is done before you attack. When they return home, you will then slay the Warden and any Hunters that remain.”
“Will the Mason’s hammer do the job?”
“It will when applied properly.”
“And how is that?”
“With all the force you can muster.” She gathered the stones and poured them into an oiled leather pouch. “Kill the Warden fast, young Theronai. I am too weak to be of much use to you if you fail.”
“You should rest.”
“Rest is not what I need to recover.”
“What do you need?”
“I must return home. Here, I am cut off from the source of my power.”
“And what source is that? Maybe I can bring it to you.”
She gave him a weak smile. “I do not think even you can fetch an Athanasian moon for me.”
“Sorry, no.”
“I will go home soon, when my moon is at its most powerful and will restore me fastest. You will stay here and guard my people.”
“I will, will I?”
“You will do this thing, for it is the only way to protect what your heart desires above all else.”
Grace.
“I see you are interested, young Theronai.”
“She remembered everything.”
Brenya’s shoulders bowed with sadness. “I know. And for that I am sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? She remembers our time together. She remembers loving me.”
“Her heart was always yours. She would have loved you again given enough time, even without her memories.”
“But now I don’t have to wait. What’s so bad about that?”
“She remembers other things as well as her love for you.”
“I know she had a hard life, but she’s strong. She can handle it. Whatever bad memories she has, we’ll work through them together.”
“It is not her memories of abuse and loss that you should fear.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Brenya shook her head. “All will be as it is meant to be. Like you, I can only watch.”
“You’re not making any sense.”
“I am, but only time will prove that to you.”
“How about we stop with the cryptic crap and you tell me how long you’ll be gone. I want to take Grace back home as soon as possible.”
“And then what?”
“I find a way to make her happy, keep her safe.”
“Have you forgotten the disk you wear?”
“Of course not.”
“Now that Grace remembers everything, she also remembers how to use the disks. What will happen to her the next time you are injured?”
His blood chilled as he realized what Brenya meant. “I’ll make sure Grace knows she’s not allowed to use them.”
“If you believe that will stop her, then you are a fool.”
He hated to admit it, but Brenya was right. “Okay, so we take them off.”
“They were created by a bonded pair of Theronai whose son was dying. The woman had great skill with the creation of magical artifacts. Her husband had boundless strength, compassion and love for his child. The couple was willing to give their lives for their son. They did not waste time worrying about how they would survive the removal of the device. Neither expected to live—certainly not without the other.”
“Surely the man wouldn’t have willingly let his wife sacrifice her life.”
/> “Such choices were not up to him. She created the device. She intended for it to stay on until her death, transferring every bit of health and power left in her.”
“She had to have known that killing herself was also a death sentence for her husband.”
“There were more female Theronai then, and one was compatible with his power. The wife had already seen to it that her family would survive, that her husband would live on.”
“No way could she have hidden her intent from her husband like that. He would have known. The mental link the luceria creates . . .”
“And that was her mistake. She believed she had shielded her intent well, but her husband knew what she would do.”
“He used the device himself,” guessed Torr.
“Their child survived. He became Gilda’s father.”
Pieces clicked into place. Gilda was the one who gave Grace the device. She would have known what it could do.
And she’d let Grace use it anyway.
Fury lashed over his skin. Gilda had been willing to sacrifice Grace to save Torr.
“How could she have done that? Her vow to protect humans . . .”
“Sacrificing one human so that you could live and save countless more? It would be an easy thing to justify.”
He didn’t agree. Not when that one human was someone like Grace. Sacrificing her—choosing to do so—was so far beyond his comprehension it seemed . . . evil. He’d never before thought of Gilda that way, but maybe he’d been wrong.
“I won’t let anyone hurt Grace like that again,” he said. “You have to help me keep her safe. Isn’t there some way to remove the disks?”
“Death is the only certain way. Removing them artificially would cause her years of torment. She would eventually recover, but she might never forgive you. That is why I commanded you to keep yours on.”
“I won’t hurt her. What else? There has to be something else we can do to keep her safe.”
“You can vow to never see her again. I will send her back to Earth with no memories of you and you will vow to keep your distance, never speaking to her again.”
Willing Sacrifice Page 25