‘We’ll go and see your parents.’
‘Thank you,’ she says quietly, pulling her hand away and placing it on my leg. ‘I want to tell them our good news. It won’t take long.’
‘I think they’ve probably figured it out.’
‘They’ll love it if we just pop in and give them the news, so they know what’s going on.’ She looks over at me and in the quick glance I catch before I start the car, I see her smiling like an angel.
‘You’re right.’ I drop my hand over hers on my thigh, and notice that she’s shivering a little. ‘Here, the heater will warm you up.’
I move my hand away, to turn the knob on the dashboard, but Abbie quickly reaches out and pulls it close to her chest as soon as I’ve adjusted the temperature in the car. ‘Thank you.’
‘That’s okay.’ I incline my head towards the vent, where heat is beginning flow to warm up the interior. ‘It’s a pretty nice car, isn’t it?’
She smiles. ‘Yes, it is, but I wasn’t talking about the car. I meant thank you, for taking me to see Zane.’
‘It’s not a problem. I’m sure he’ll be alright.’
‘I hope so,’ she says pensively, and turns her head to glance back at the hospital. ‘I think he’s in good hands.’
There’s silence between us for a few minutes. I concentrate on the road, the traffic and the direction we’re taking – leading us to her parents’ house.
‘Do you think Jed went home?’ she asks, looking out the window.
I shake my head. ‘No way. He’s around the hospital somewhere, I’m sure of it. But I guess he won’t get much of a look in, not with Zane’s mum there. I assume, as far as they’re concerned, Jed’s just a friend of Zane’s?’
From the corner of my eye, I catch Abbie as she slumps her head back against the headrest. She takes a deep breath before she responds. ‘Yes. He hasn’t told anyone really – especially not his parents,’ she says. ‘Poor Jed. I don’t know how I’d cope if that were you, and I couldn’t sit beside you and hold your hand.’
I don’t want to talk about this glum stuff. Despite everything that’s going on, the one bright point in my life is my re-established relationship with Abbie, and I want to savour the fact that we’re back together, despite the sadness that surrounds us. ‘How about we talk about our living arrangements? What we’re going to do now?’
She responds matter-of-factly. ‘Well, I know where I want to be. I’m coming with you.’
I don’t want to rain on her parade, but I don’t think this is going to be as easy as we might want it to be. ‘It’s not that simple, Princess.’
‘I know. Mum and Dad will worry, but they would anyway. They’ll just have to accept it. We’re getting married, aren’t we?’ She holds up her hand and gazes at the ring I placed on her finger last night.
Last night. It feels more like a week ago. So much has happened and I suffer the sick sensation that life is going to be pretty full-on for a while – a long while.
‘Yeah, we sure are.’
‘And we’re having a baby. We also need to create a stable second home for Tyler.’
This is why I love her. She cares so much for others. And I know it’s not a church thing, even the church can’t teach someone to care for others the way Abbie does. It’s in her heart. Compassion and strength – two things I’m pretty certain I lost a long time ago.
We pull up at a red light and I steal the opportunity to take in her beauty. The soft glow of the street light bathes her pale skin with a radiance that makes her appear angelic. My fingers instinctively reach up to touch her cheek and I fervently wish we were in bed, so I could show her just how much I love and worship her.
‘We’ll talk to your parents tonight, and start organising things as soon as Zane wakes up. It will all work out, you’ll see,’ I say. I realize I’m grinning and she beams back at me.
∞~∞~∞~∞
Izzy and Jade are snuggled together under a blanket on the couch when we walk in. Looking surprised to see us, Jade throws the blanket aside and rushes across to hug her sister. ‘Is Zane awake?’
‘Not yet,’ Abbie breathes out the words, as if they’re casting a pall of gloom over her emotions.
‘Did they kick you out?’ Izzy questions from her position on the couch.
‘No. Visiting hours are over, but they don’t seem to mind a couple of people staying a bit later. Zane’s mum is still there. We just wanted to come home and give you some—’ Abbie stops speaking abruptly, looks up at me, and takes a deep breath before she continues. ‘Valentine and I are engaged.’
I know she’s holding her breath now, waiting for their reaction. So do I.
‘Really, Abbs? Eeeep!’ Jade squeals, throwing her arms around her sister.
I watch Izzy leap up from the couch to join the embrace. ‘That makes two of us!’ she says elatedly, pulling back and holding out her left hand for Abbie to see. ‘Patrick proposed to me last night – in front of Mum and Dad!’
Shit! There’s another strike against my name – I haven’t asked Mr. Bennet for permission to marry his daughter. I turn to Abbie, and it appears as if this fact has just registered with her too.
‘Um, where’s Mum and Dad?’ she asks, sounding a little panicked.
‘They went for a drive to buy some milk. I think they wanted some “alone time” to talk about the day’s events.’ Izzy squeezes Abbie’s hands. ‘It’s been such a rollercoaster.’
Abbie looks up at me again and smiles. ‘Yeah, that’s an understatement.’ Her smile slides and she adds, ‘I wish Zane was here, and none of this had ever happened to him.’
We all wrap our arms around her, providing comfort and support.
‘This looks serious,’ Mr. Bennet says, as he pushes open the front door a few seconds later.
I grab my opportunity quickly, wanting to make this right for Abbie’s sake. Pulling away from the girls, I shake hands with Mr. Bennet and kiss Abbie’s mum on the cheek. ‘Er, Mr. Bennet, could I have a private word with you please?’
‘Sure,’ he agrees. ‘Let’s go outside.’ He turns back to the front door and leads the way.
We leave the girls swarming around each other and as we stand together on the verandah, my heart starts to race. My hands are sweating and I feel as if I’m going to be sick. ‘Er… as you know, I came here last night to speak with Abbie?’
‘Yes, I know.’ He doesn’t look impressed, and his gaze is fixed pointedly on the road outside the house. He doesn’t look at me, merely waits silently, to hear what I have to say.
I swallow down my nerves and clear my throat. ‘I came to see if she could forgive me,’ I admit, leaning against the verandah balustrade. I feel like an anxious teenager, so I try hard to appear calm.
‘It looks like she did,’ he says, taking a seat at the small outdoor setting. He clasps his hands together.
‘Yes, sir, she did. But I wanted to ask you, if you’d allow me to marry her?’ Shit, that came out quicker than I’d hoped. I’d intended to use some finesse when I asked him.
He studies me for a moment and my heart seems to be thumping up around the vicinity of my throat.
‘Fair enough,’ he finally says. ‘It’s good to see you owning up to your responsibilities, son. I know it’s not an easy thing to handle.’
‘I couldn’t stay away any longer,’ I stop and clear my throat. ‘I’ve already asked Abbie to marry me, sir, but if you’d rather we didn’t rush into—’
‘Rush? Oh, no, son, this isn’t rushing!’ he interrupts. ‘Don’t get me wrong. I can’t say I’m impressed with the way you’ve handled things. But, I have to say, I’m glad you’re back and if Abbie forgives you, then that’s good enough – for now.’ He puts out a hand and I take his offer with a sigh of relief.
‘Thank you, Mr. Bennet.’
‘No problem. And, please, stop with the Mr. Bennet and call me Robert.’
I smile. ‘Okay, Robert.’
‘Now, it’s going to be a crazy
ride, so hold on,’ he chuckles. ‘Two weddings and a baby – geez, we have a fair bit to organise,’ he adds with a shake of his head.
As I follow him inside, I’m a little shell-shocked. He took that really well. And then my stomach sinks a little when I consider his last words. It is going to be a crazy ride – two weddings, a baby and Zane being injured – I hope I’m enough.
∞~∞~∞~∞
When we pull into the drive, Abbie straightens up and looks over at me. She’s studying me intensely.
‘What’s up?’ I glance over at her and turn off the ignition.
She undoes her seatbelt and climbs over onto my lap.
‘Mmmm.’
‘Don’t get any ideas,’ she giggles as she gets comfortable between me and the steering wheel. ‘I want to look at you.’
‘Now?’
‘Yes, now.’ She takes a deep breath and places her hands over my cheeks.
‘What’s to look at? You’ll see me every day for the rest of your life.’
‘There’s plenty to look at, Valentine Hewitt.’ She pushes her hand to the top of my head, tightening her grasp on my hair and pulling my head back, so my face rises up to hers. She looks deeply into my eyes. ‘I want to know what’s going on behind those brooding eyes of yours – you seem to have a lot going on and I’ve come to realise that I hardly know you.’
This makes me uncomfortable – I drop my gaze from hers. Of course she knows me… well enough, anyway.
‘You want to talk now? In the car?’ I try to sound light-hearted, but she doesn’t buy it.
‘Yes, and not your kind of talking. No hands, just words.’
I smile. No hands. I guess we’ve done a lot of that. ‘Okay, what would you like to talk about?’
‘When we met, I was very… well, inexperienced—’
‘Ha! Yeah, you were.’ I remember her sweet girlish nature, as if it was yesterday and I realise how much she’s changed – how much I’ve put her through – I frown.
‘Yes, but not anymore. I pushed you away when things got tough. Like a spoiled brat, when things didn’t seem to be going my way, and I shouldn’t have.’
Is this girl apologising to me? ‘No, you don’t need to say this stuff.’ I cup her face in my hands and look into her eyes; they’ve settled back to the grey they become when she isn’t happy and this concerns me further. ‘I should have manned up. I acted like a stupid teenager. I should never have dropped you at the train station – I was the one in the wrong—’
‘No, no, you weren’t. But let’s just leave it at that. What I was getting at is we’ve hardly had any time to talk –really talk – and I think we should.’
‘Oh. I don’t know if I’m any good at talking. But, if you want to do other stuff—’ I grin and kiss her gaping mouth.
She pushes me back, with a giggle. ‘No! Not that – I’m serious!’
I laugh and put my hands up in surrender. ‘Okay, but let’s go inside and we’ll talk in bed – where it’s warm. You can tell me what you want to do with the baby’s room.’
This brightens her smile and her eyes light up. ‘Okay, and I also want to know how it went talking to my dad.’ She opens the driver side door, kisses me and climbs off my lap.
‘You sure you don’t want to fool around first? It won’t be long before you can’t squeeze between me and the steering wheel.’
I get a stern look, followed by a shake of her head and a laugh.
I guess that’s a no.
‘I’ll bring the bags,’ I say, pulling two heavy bags from the back seat. ‘Geez, what have you got in here!’
‘Plenty!’ she shouts out as she opens the front door.
I haul the bags up the verandah stairs and through the open front door. ‘Would you like a tea?’ I ask, when I carry the bags into the living room.
‘I’d love something to eat.’
I put my hands to my head and grasp my hair in frustration. ‘I’m sorry,’ I say. How can I be so stupid, forgetting something so basic, as making sure she eats properly?
Crossing the floor and wrapping her arms around me she says, ‘It’s okay, I know you probably don’t have much here to eat. Anything will do.’
‘Okay. You sit down and I’ll fix us something.’ I kiss her forehead and think fast. I haven’t been to the grocery store in days. I know the fridge is bare and I’m a dick – why wasn’t I more organised? I approach this woman with an offer of marriage and I can’t even make sure there’s food here for when, or if, she decides she’ll come home with me?
I open the fridge and stare dismally at the contents. Some left over Indian take-out from three days ago – I don’t think that’s going to impress her. Then I spot a half a carton of eggs, a bunch of chives and a small packet of bacon. It’s a start. I check for margarine and, bingo! I have an idea. Eggs with bacon, on toast. I know there’s definitely some bread in the freezer.
‘I’ve got it,’ I say, pretty proud of my idea. ‘You go and get into something comfy and I’ll whip up some dinner.’
Abbie stands up, stretches and grins at me. ‘Okay, I’ll be back.’
When she leaves the room I get started and can only hope for the best – this is the first test of many and I’d better step up to the plate.
∞~∞~∞~∞
She falls asleep almost as soon as we get into bed, and I’m left alone with my demons.
I was on a collision course before Abbie came into my life – I know, that sounds so cliché, but there it is – the truth. It seemed only two things helped me forget; the music and the drugs. Both took me away from the pain in my past, helped me get up each day and make a weak attempt at living my life. But it was a life being lived behind a veil, one where the blood, the screams and the sounds of glass shattering got blurred beyond recognition. But what goes up must come down, right? And I did – sometimes at the most inconvenient times; like when Tyler was born, or at Mum’s funeral. This just made me feel worse. Worthless.
Then Abbie arrived.
So together. So young. So filled with hopes and dreams, she made my head spin. She terrified the hell out of me. I started looking forward to the morning, just a little bit, as long as she was a part of it. I wanted to be a better dad to Tyler, show some real commitment. I began to let the veil go, you know? Let the light in. But Abbie was like a burst of sunlight that hurts the eyes – she was moving too fast – covering me in unfiltered light – a harsh glow that I just wasn’t ready for. In her light, I couldn’t see Dillan. In her light, I couldn’t see the blood, or hear the screams – and I wasn’t sure I could let that go. I wasn’t ready to ask God for absolution.
Am I ready now? I don’t know.
∞~∞~∞~∞
The following morning, I drop Abbie off at the hospital early, and head off to work. Selling cars for a crust isn’t how I saw my future, but then again, when does life go exactly how you want? My boss is a dick and the whinging, whining customers always want something for nothing; I miss making coffee for a living. And it sucks having to leave Abbie for the day.
When I arrive back at the hospital, she hasn’t emerged from Zane’s room so I head down to grab a coffee. Yeah, I know – I drink a lot of coffee.
I take the Cuban Espresso from the young guy behind the counter and as I turn, somebody catches my eye; it’s Zane’s boyfriend… what’s his name? Oh, yeah, that’s right. Jed.
He’s sitting by a dirty window, gazing into his coffee cup – he looks miserable. His dreadies are pulled up high on his head and he’s sporting a three-day growth on his chin. I doubt he’s even been home to change since Zane was injured, because I’m sure he’s still wearing the same black shirt and faded jeans I saw him in at The Lair.
‘Is this seat taken?’ I ask, standing beside the empty chair at his table.
He doesn’t look up. ‘Nope.’
‘Jed, isn’t it?’
‘Yeah.’ He looks up with a downtrodden expression I recognize too well, and my stomach flips. Geez, this is shit.
What do I say? I’m guessing he doesn’t want to indulge in small talk.
I put my cup down and turn the chair around so I can straddle it – hoping it makes the situation seem less formal.
He clears his throat and continues to stare out the window. ‘Did the cops talk to you?’
This takes me by surprise. ‘Yeah, um… just to ask about how I found him.’
‘Me too,’ he mumbles; I can barely make out the words. He looks back at me and his eyes are blank, defeated. ‘I can’t even sit near him – I just wanted to hold—’ he stops abruptly. I know what he was going to say, but he doesn’t complete the sentence. He sighs and adds, ‘I never wanted this… you know? This whole relationship thing.’
I take a big gulp of my coffee. He’s going to have “the talk” with me; the type of discussion friends have – except we’re not friends.
‘He came to the club one night – he was there with his sister and when he came to the bar to buy drinks… I don’t know… well, shit.’ He pauses and starts to stir his coffee with a plastic spoon. ‘He was a church boy – I could see he didn’t belong in a place like that – my world. I knew straight away that he was way out of my league.’ He shakes his head sadly.
‘You know you don’t have to tell me—’ I begin.
Jed interrupts. ‘No, I want to. I want you to know what he means to me.’
‘I do know—’
Jed lift an eyebrow, eyeing me cynically. ‘How would you know?’
‘Because I met Abbie the same way. And I love her – even though she’s way out of my league, too.’
Jed smiles a sad, knowing smile. Then as he lifts his cup to his lips, his smile grows. ‘I must sound like a real idiot?’
‘No mate, no way – I would be the same, it’s cool, really.’
Jed puts his cup down and offers his hand to me. I take his hand, shaking it, and smile back at him.
I guess we have something in common.
As we sit in silence, both lost in thought, I glance over at the counter. My heart lifts at the sight of Zane’s mum, being comforted by a tall, middle-aged guy. I assume he’s her husband from the way he holds her.
Absolution (The Infinity Series Book 2) Page 3
