After another long pause, Matt expected her to say no, she wouldn’t come back until they caught Ricky. He couldn’t really blame her if she made that decision, but he mentally crossed his fingers she’d pack immediately to return to Quail Ridge.
“Stay where?” she asked, the joy slipping from her voice a bit as reality nudged its way back into the conversation. “I don’t have a home, Matt. Is the top floor of the mill ready for someone to live in?”
He should’ve realized she wouldn’t immediately agree to stay at his place. It was probably for the best. They weren’t exactly ready to move in with each other, despite the fact that physically they’d reached that point. Emotionally they had a ways to go, but he still held onto the hope it’d happen for them. If he could get her to stop running.
“We could have the utilities turned on in no time. You’d need furniture. The place is rather bare.”
“Definitely a problem,” she mused. “I should be there for him.” It seemed like she was talking more to herself.
“You can stay with me, Krista, at least until the loft is ready,” he told her quietly and closed his eyes. “No strings attached, no expectations.”
Silence took over once more. Damn, what is she thinking? That it would be as hard to make such a deal, as it would be for him to keep it? How impossible to have her under his roof without touching her, kissing her. Loving her.
He heard her sigh from the other end of the line. “If I can’t come up with anything else . . . Only as a last resort, Matt. I will take the loft. I just need to arrange for some furnishing.”
“Well, I’ll accept that,” Matt replied, feeling a bit disappointed. At least she’d be back in town. Gus would be much happier with her than with him anyway. And then they could figure out where their relationship was heading in a more leisurely manner.
“I’ll be back sometime tomorrow. Thanks for letting me know, Matt. I appreciate it. A huge weight’s been lifted from my shoulders.” Her tone of voice was stronger now she’d made up her mind, as if she were shoring her courage to come back. His admiration of her grew even more.
After he gave her the number of the vet’s office, they said their goodbyes, and Matt hung up, feeling only slightly better than he had before he made the call.
Early the next morning, before the sun barely cracked over the roofs of the buildings surrounding Penny’s house, Krista gave her friend a tight goodbye hug with a promise she wouldn’t spend so much time away. Then, with her Jeep packed with four old brown suitcases to replace the Wal-Mart bags, she headed out of town and back up north.
Her heart already pounded in expectation of not only seeing Gus again, but Matt as well. She shoved a tear off her cheek with the back of her hand and grinned as she thought of the old dog. Her smile dimmed a little. Matt waited for her, too. A completely different kind of joy filled her.
Different than she’d ever felt before and at the moment she refused to name it. Not yet. It had only been a week, yet it seemed much longer since she’d said goodbye to Matt and disappeared. Seeing him again would tell her for sure if their few days together had been a fluke or something real.
Her departure had been an attempt to put their relationship into perspective as much as it had been a way to escape the situation with Ricky. She’d figured out that fact not long after arriving at Penny’s. She’d been surprised at how much she missed Matt, her desire to put down roots in her hometown, and begin a real relationship.
She couldn’t jump right back into his bed. Take things slowly. No need to rush. If she wanted this to last they needed to ease into it. The only problem, she was having a hell of a time convincing herself of that fact. Instinct pushed her to go straight to Matt, full speed ahead.
Before leaving Penny’s, she’d called the vet who cared for Gus. The dog was recovering but would need to stay for at least another two days.
Krista made another call to book a room at a hotel outside town, then made a list of basics she’d need to furnish the loft. A bed, a table and a sofa. A secondhand furniture store outside Quail Ridge could provide those bare necessities. The rest of the stuff could be picked up as she needed.
Her first stop back in Quail Ridge was Dr. Rhodes’s office to see Gus. Tears spilled down her cheeks. She pushed them out of the way and sat on the hard floor next to Gus’s kennel. The dog lifted his head and his tail beat madly against the metal wall behind him. She held out her hand to him. He licked it enthusiastically.
“You don’t know how happy I am to see you, you old dog.” Krista’s cracked with emotion. “Why did you have to scare me like that?”
Gus reached out a paw and swatted Krista on the leg. With the back of her hand, she swept away the tears that blurred her vision, and grinned.
“Yeah, you’re going to be okay. I wish I could bring you home right now, but to tell the truth, I don’t have a home to go to yet, just a cold hotel room. I’m working on it.” Krista managed a shaky smile for the animal.
The dog scooted closer and rested his chin on her thigh, his brown eyes gazing at her. She stroked his smooth head, amazed that even after all he’d been through, he still loved her, trusted her.
“Oh Gus, what happened? I thought coming here would be good for us. Seems like everything has gone wrong. I think we can recover, though, and make everything okay. We just need a little time and no more setbacks. Right now I’ve got some things to do. Don’t you worry, big guy, I’ll be back really soon.”
Krista lifted the dog’s chin and tucked him back inside the kennel, then shut the door. She hated to leave him, and turned away from the sad expression in his eyes. It’s only for a while. On her way out, she thanked the vet.
The first bite of winter was in the air, crisp, clean, and with a chilliness that wouldn’t be retreating until spring. Krista pulled her gloves out of her pocket and headed toward her Jeep. She scanned the parking lot, empty except for her vehicle. She couldn’t shake the feeling she wasn’t alone. Fear crept through her veins with icy fingers. She tightened her grip on her keys and picked up the pace.
“Damn you, Ricky,” she muttered when she reached the Jeep. She steeled her nerves. She knew she wouldn’t be able to stay here if she was afraid he’d be lurking behind every tree, every corner.
As soon as she settled in the Jeep, the key in the ignition, she forced her mind away from her fears and to more important, more sensible matters. She had too much to do. Get the furniture, have it delivered to the loft apartment at the mill, talk to the contractors about where they were with the reconstruction and contact Cameron to let him know she was ready to push on.
Go see Matt.
She didn’t start the Jeep. She stared toward the grayish forest, where the land climbed to the ridge. Behind her, lower Main Street led to downtown Quail Ridge. It was her life fifteen years ago and everything in her heart told her this place was destined to be her future.
Her youth center would be rebuilt and she couldn’t hand it over to someone else and walk away. She had the land where her childhood home once stood. Emily might not agree, but why couldn’t she put a new house on it?
She couldn’t walk away from those aspects of her life, and she couldn’t walk away from Matt either. Maybe it was too soon, yet she couldn’t deny the importance of his presence in her life, and her feelings for him.
She loved him.
The thought made her chuckle. Okay, she’d keep that fact to herself for now. No need to scare him or give away too much of herself so soon. There would be plenty of time to explore their feelings for each other, if he was willing. She had a feeling he would.
There was one thing she had to do before she could move on with her life in Quail Ridge. She started the Jeep and headed back into town. Before reaching the center, she turned onto the road leading to the cemetery. The time had come to say goodbye to Jay.
&
nbsp; If she were ever going to have a life with Matt, she needed this. For the sake of her heart and mind, she’d put the past and her feelings of guilt to rest.
Under the drab sky, Krista found Jay’s grave, marked with a gray marble stone a few shades darker than the clouds hanging low. For a long moment, she stayed put in the Jeep, staring at the plot. Someone had left an enormous pot of rust colored mums, fading in the mid November chill. She felt bad about coming empty-handed, but she couldn’t think of anything to bring for Jay now. After hearing what Ricky had to say about Jay and those final weeks, she didn’t think he’d want anything from her anyway. Except freedom.
Now it was her time to ask for freedom.
Krista stepped out onto the fading grass and made her way to the foot of the grave. She hadn’t known what she’d feel at this moment. Sadness and regret swelled up from inside her and tightened her throat. She swallowed and wrapped her arms around her body against the sudden cold that didn’t come from the wind riding over the treeless landscape. The gnawing iciness came from deep within.
It wasn’t the overwhelming heartbreak she’d felt back in the beginning, when she believed Jay had gone to his grave loving her. A tear slid from the corner of her eye, leaving a cold trail as it slid down her cheek.
“I wish you would’ve told me how you felt,” she said stonily. “I never would’ve pushed you into fatherhood. Maybe I would’ve hated you for it, but you’d still be alive and Liz would still be here. And our baby too.”
Krista pushed back on the unexpected anger. What good would it do to get angry with a man who’d been dead for fifteen years? What was done was done.
“It’s too late for that now,” she murmured. “Maybe nothing we did would’ve changed things. I don’t know, Jay. What I do know is that I have to say goodbye to you. Let you go. Let our past go so I can move on with my future. I want it to be with your brother.” Krista bit back on a smile. “Isn’t that funny? In an ironic kind of way? He’s a good man and I love him. I’m hoping he’ll feel the same way about me.”
“Very touching.” The voice that crept up behind her sounded icier than the bitter wind.
Krista’s heart leapt straight from her chest into her throat. She swung around and locked gazes with Ricky. He stood between her and her Jeep.
He didn’t appear to be living in the manner in which he’d become accustomed. His dark hair was rumpled, not by the stiff breeze that whipped around them with knife-like sharpness, but from a lack of grooming. A beard and moustache darkened his face. Even his clothes were tired and wrinkled.
Despite all this, there was a glint in his eyes, a terrible flash in his smile that said more than words ever could. It bordered on maniacal. She’d seen it before in her travels, yet it had never been aimed at her.
A nauseating sensation knifed at her belly. She clutched at her abdomen and took a step back from him.
“Leave me alone, Ricky.” Her warning sounded as ridiculous to her as it probably did to him. His smile widened and he chuckled.
Then his grin died quickly.
“How many times do you come to her grave?” he asked coldly.
“What?” Krista glanced surreptitiously around to see if there was anyone within yelling distance, anyone who could help her. She and Ricky appeared to be the only living humans in the cemetery. They were too far from the road, and there weren’t any houses within a half mile.
Ricky had her at his mercy. She doubted she could talk him down from his hatred.
“I visit her every day,” Ricky continued. “Well, I did until I had to leave town. Every fucking day I would come here and talk to her.”
He took a step toward her. Krista eyed his stance warily. His hands were shoved deep within the pockets of an old sheepskin jacket. She prayed it was because they were cold, and not because he held a weapon. Something he could use to hurt her. She edged to the side, trying to get closer to the Jeep.
“Every damned day for fifteen years. Fifteen years that she should’ve been alive and with me.” His eyes were absolutely emotionless and it chilled her right to her soul.
“I lost her too, Ricky. I loved her too,” Krista choked out, hoping somehow she’d be able to reach him and remind him he wasn’t the only one devastated by that night.
“No!” Ricky pulled one hand from his pocket and pointed a bare finger at her. “No, you didn’t love her. Not like I did. You couldn’t have.”
“I didn’t kill her.” Krista sidled an inch, but kept her eyes on the man.
“You did kill her,” he countered hotly. “You might as well have just pointed a gun at her and put a bullet in her head.”
He loomed closer, and his fingers flexed and tightened with nervous energy. It hardly seemed like this was the same man she’d had run-ins with since returning to Quail Ridge. This Ricky was nervous, crazy and deadly. Of that she had no doubt. Debating with him over the events of the night would be pointless. He’d never see the truth. He’d see what he wanted to see, what he’d convinced other people must be true.
“Do you want me to leave town? Is that all?”
She took another half-step to the right, praying he wouldn’t notice.
Ricky laughed again. “No, I don’t want you to leave town, Krista. Do you think I can go back to my old life? That’s gone. Quail Ridge, Rachel, everything I had is gone, thanks to you.”
“Then what do you want?”
Ricky pulled his other hand out of its pocket. The gun was small, yet deadly enough, especially when he lifted it and pointed it directly at her. Krista sucked in her breath and bolted to the right. If she could make it to the far side of the Jeep, she could crawl in and escape.
She almost made it to the bumper when the first bullet knocked her off her feet, slamming into her hip. Raging hot pain sizzled through her flesh straight through her bone. Instinctively, she pressed her hand against the wound, but that only brought on more agony. Blood already saturated the leg of her pants.
The whole world became deadly calm except for the panic that ricocheted through her mind. Krista heard Ricky’s steps approaching.
“If she’s dead you’re going to have to be dead, too. I’m here to finish what you started,” Ricky snarled through a tightly clenched jaw as he stood over her.
She barely registered the words. What difference did it make anyway? Her gaze flicked away from him and she stared at the heavy clouds overhead. Fat snowflakes twirled out of the sky, peacefully falling in wayward spirals toward her.
Even when the second bullet struck her, she didn’t take her eyes off the flakes. They hypnotized her and eased her mind from the pain, dulling the fear.
She drew a breath and held it in her lungs before exhaling, thinking this could be the last breath she’d ever take.
The world faded. Krista blinked away the tears that mixed with the snowflakes on her cheeks. All she could see was the sky and the snow. In a way, she was happy the end felt so peaceful.
Matt’s face appearing above her in a dream didn’t surprise her. If only she could understand what he was saying.
Maybe his goodbyes. She whispered hers back to him.
“I love you.”
Chapter 14
“I didn’t think this day would ever come.” Krista sighed. She leaned back in the passenger seat of Emily’s Yukon and stared out the window as they cruised across the border into New Hampshire. Spring left a haze of pale green on the tree branches, pushing away the gray of the mild winter behind them. She opened the window a few inches and raised her face so she could feel the cool air brush past her skin.
Every little thing was richer and she appreciated the fresh breeze more than she ever had before. Her body might have been battered, yet she came out of each conflict with a stronger appreciation for life.
It had been a tough winter. One o
f the hardest. She could handle spending Thanksgiving in the hospital, but the recovery nearly beat her. There had been days she had wished Ricky’s bullets had done their job. Yet she pushed on. That had been her way since the beginning. She bit back on the pain and the frustration, even when she just wanted to pull the covers over her head and go back to sleep. Instead, she got up, went to physical therapy, and made her body work again.
“Almost there,” Emily announced.
Krista glanced over at her. Things between them had changed. For once in their lives, they leaned on each other, tried to understand each other.
Staying with her sister had been the only choice. Quail Ridge was too far away from her rehab and physical therapy, so Emily had offered her a place to stay in Boston over the winter. It had been a wonderful chance to work on their relationship as well.
As soon as March rolled to an end, she gladly left her strenuous therapy behind. She longed to go home for good.
“You sure you’re okay with me keeping the land?” Krista asked. Their parents’ property had been a point of contention between the two since their mother’s death.
Emily laughed. “It’s more important to you than I’d ever thought. I never realized you’d want to settle there of all places.”
“I never thought so either. Still, it’s where I need to be. It’s definitely time for me to take the reins back at the center, and I miss my dog.”
Emily chuckled. “Sorry, but my landlord would’ve had my butt out on the pavement if I brought a dog in.”
Where One Road Leads Page 19
