My thrusts became more urgent as the emotion surged through me. I wanted to give her more pleasure than this world offered.
I reached forward and stroked her clit, twisting and pinching it until she shook from the orgasm that had finally broken free inside her.
Together we tumbled down the mountain’s edge together. Neither caring what waited at the bottom. Wrapped tight in each other’s arms. With heavy breath lining each other’s ears we crashed spent.
Complete.
I pulled out from her and wrapped her in my arms.
“Everything you do to me feels good,” she whispered.
I grinned wickedly. I knew I had just found my new game-day ritual and I fucking loved her for it.
Cameron sat at the bar at the kitchen island, shoveling waffles into his mouth and gulping orange juice.
“Slow down, bud,” I teased. “There’s more. Plenty more.”
His face turned crimson and I realized I had embarrassed him.
“What I mean is, you can have as much breakfast as you want. Whatever you want. Ok?”
The last thing I wanted to do was to shame him into not eating. I was trying to get more calories in him. He was stick thin.
He brushed his bangs from his eyes and poured more syrup on his plate.
“Where’s Mia?”
“Still in the shower.” I took a sip of coffee, turning to look out of the small kitchen sink window.
After this morning, I knew I was seriously fucked.
What the ever loving fuck happened to me?
I had fallen into an alternate universe or some shit. Not that I minded, especially if I got to keep spending my time cuddled up with Mia, but damn.
This was not Crawford Hawkins. I didn’t do this family shit.
What the fuck was wrong with me?
I wasn’t the kind of guy who was tied down. And now all these damn emotions were trying to bubble up inside of me making my head spin. I closed my eyes and all I could see was Mia with her long silky soft legs wrapped around me and the perfect come-grab-me curve of her hips, begging for me pull her back up against me and bury myself inside of her over and over again.
I had a game I needed to think about. A kid who needed a dad. I shook my head. I was so far over the cliff I didn’t recognize myself. The craziest shit was that I liked it. I fucking loved it.
“So, Mia’s going to take you to the game with her dad, Judge Bristow. You’ll be up in the box again.”
I looked at my watch. I had to head to the stadium in twenty minutes.
“Ok.” Cameron stared at his empty plate.
I didn’t even ask. I piled another layer of waffles on the river of syrup he had made.
He grinned.
Mia appeared, wearing a Sharks jersey. Her tits bobbed from the deep V-cut. She looked fucking gorgeous. And I knew she was wearing that jersey for me. To make me proud. To cheer for my team. To support me on the field.
Knowing she would be in that box today, did something to me. I didn’t know how to explain it.
I set my coffee down and pulled her into my arms.
I whispered in her ear. “You make me want to get lost right now, baby.”
Her eyes darted to mine. “Me too,” she sighed.
I knew we had an audience. I made a little space between us, but kept my hand on her hip. I could barely tear my body away from her. It was as if there was some kind of magnet on her that pulled me in every time I was near her. It was fucking insane.
“I’ve got to get dressed.” The team dress code before games called for a suit. I hated wearing them, but as the QB I had the most press exposure.
“I thought you could wear your new Sharks sweatshirt,” she spoke to Cameron. “And maybe the new jeans?”
“Ok.”
She looked at me. “I’ve got it covered here. We’ll see you after the game.”
“Thanks.” I kissed her on the forehead and walked to my bedroom. Well, now it was our bedroom. I hadn’t just invited her into my bed, I had invited her into every part of my life.
I pushed the door open when I heard her footsteps behind me.
“I know you’ve got the game on your mind, but I wanted to ask you something.”
“What’s going on?”
She chewed on her bottom lip. “I was wondering what you thought about buying a Christmas tree.”
My brow furrowed. “What?”
She exhaled. “Christmas is a few weeks away and you don’t have any decorations here. I can bring some over from my place. But, have you thought about giving Cameron a real family Christmas? The tree, stockings, presents, cookies? All that stuff?”
“Yeah, but I guess not enough. I’ve been preoccupied. I’ve got a game today, baby.”
“I know. I know. And I can take care of the tree if you’ll just say it’s ok to put one up here.”
Fuck. What kind of a hardass did she think I was? That I would deny a kid a tree? I wasn’t some kind of Grinch. I didn’t want Cameron to have the kind of thread-bare holidays I did. He deserved better.
“We’ll go after the game. Together.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Really. The whole damn thing. Wreaths, that stupid green stuff.”
“Garland?” She giggled.
“Yeah, whatever the fuck it is. Ornaments. Lights. Anything you and Cameron want.”
She threw her arms around my neck and squealed. “Oh my God, I can’t believe you said yes to all of this.”
“Who doesn’t like Christmas?” I shrugged.
Truth was—I didn’t. If the Sharks played on Christmas Day it meant I could ignore the fact that all around me people were spending time together with their perfect families. Perfect presents. Perfect meals. I focused on football and nothing else.
But this year all that was different.
“He’s going to be so excited,” Mia said.
My hand slid to her ass. “And what about you?”
Her breath hitched. “Very excited.”
“You’re killing me in this jersey. I want to do so many dirty things to you right now.”
“You do?” Her eyes lit with desire.
“Fuck, yes I do. I love seeing my number stamped on your tits. Everyone in that stadium needs to know you are mine, baby.” My hand roamed under the shirt, sliding to her breasts. “But I’ve got to go.”
I couldn’t be late. I had press. Coaches meetings and then I needed to meet with the team.
She nodded sadly. “We’ll have to celebrate after Cameron goes to bed.”
My mouth landed on hers with a hungry kiss. She had no idea how we were going to celebrate. For the first time in my life I had everything I wanted. It was worth an epic, unforgettable celebration.
35
Mia
This game was more nerve-wracking than the last one. My dad was on one side of me, Cameron on the other, and Pops paced behind us. He had the hardest time watching. Every time there was a play he looked up and then started grumbling.
The Sharks were down by a touchdown with only six minutes left in the fourth quarter. It wasn’t looking good.
I had successfully downed two beers, which was two beers more than I ever drank. It still didn’t take the edge off. I was a complete wreck.
Cameron was worried too. There was a look of fear on his face. I tried to reassure him.
“Crawford’s got this. Don’t worry.”
But I didn’t know what I was talking about.
“He has great receivers. Nothing to worry about,” my dad piped in.
I tried to smile, but my stomach was in knots. I wasn’t sure I wasn’t going to throw up. What did I do if they lost? How did I help him through it? Was I built to handle this kind of pressure? I was supposed to be the support system, and yet I was barely keeping it together. Cameron needed me to stay calm and Hawk was going to need me to be his rock when this was over.
“I can’t look,” I whispered.
My dad wrapped an arm around my sho
ulder. Hawk had the ball. I took a peak through my fingers just as he threw a sharp spiral into the end zone.
We jumped up and down in the box. “Yes!”
The game was tied, but now the ball went back to the other team. If they scored on this drive, we might not have a chance to get the ball back in time.
Cameron was wringing his hands and his feet shuffled back and forth under his recliner. Poor thing. I wished there was something more I could do. We were all on edge. This must be what football families went through every Sunday. Winning was fun. Losing was painful.
I don’t know how it happened but the Badgers couldn’t make it past the third down. They had to punt on fourth down and the Sharks ended up with just over a minute on the clock and the ball on the forty-yard line.
“Come on, Crawford. Come on,” Cameron coaxed. His little face was scrunched up in concentration.
I echoed the same words. “Come on. Come on.”
The ball was snapped. I gripped the edge of my seat. Hawk took three steps backward and then he was pummeled to the ground in a vicious tackle.
“Oh my God.”
He bounced up, cursing at the guy who had rushed him.
It was now second down.
The time was ticking off the clock and I felt a ravenous desperation in my veins. He had to do this. He had to find a way to get the ball in the end zone.
Suddenly he had the ball in his hands. Instead of stepping back into his usual drop count, he ran forward and slid to get the first down.
Air gushed from my lungs. I looked at the jumbotron. There were forty-five seconds left and I wasn’t sure I would survive it.
Hawk looked calm. I saw the intensity in his eyes when the camera zoomed in on his face. He was determined and certain.
The whistle blew for the play and Hawk handed the ball off to one of the running backs. There were only thirty seconds left when he ran seven yards.
The Sharks called time out.
I didn’t know how Hawk handled this. How he was made to shield himself from the pressure. But he did. He was cool and calculated out there. I bit my lip. Honestly, it was hot as hell how he commanded that team. How he led them. How he took control.
And then somehow I let go of my worries. I knew this man more intimately than the thousands of people in the stadium. I trusted him with my body. My life. This child. I knew the game was in the hands of the man who could deliver.
I let the calm wash over me as he moved toward the line of scrimmage.
The ball was snapped. Hawk dropped back and the ball soared over the field. There was laser precision to his aim. It was amazing how he found a receiver in that sea of bodies. But he did. When no one else saw it. He did.
I clapped wildly when the ball landed in his receiver’s arms in the end zone.
“Did we win?” Cameron asked, excitedly.
“Yes!” I jumped up and down. “We did, honey. We sure did.”
My dad hugged me and Pops dished out high fives to all of us.
“I knew he could do it.” Cameron grinned. “I knew it.”
I smiled down at him. “Me too.”
“What about this one?” Hawk held out a wobbly spruce.
Cameron and I shook it off. “No, not that one.”
I pulled the plaid scarf closer to me. It almost made me tingle now every time I wore it. It had a completely different memory in my fashion memory bank. Maybe we could use it again in tonight’s game celebration.
It had started to snow lightly around DC.
Cameron ran ahead of us. “I like this one.” He pointed to a thick Fraser fir.
“That’s the one?” Hawk asked.
“I think so.” I touched the needles on the tree. “It’s perfect.”
Hawk hauled it onto his shoulder as if it weighed the same as a bag of pinecones. Was there anything this man couldn’t do? He had just taken his team to the next round of playoffs and now he was making a little boy’s dreams come true.
“Let’s get it home.”
We followed behind him as he carried the tree to the makeshift counter at the tree farm.
By the time we got the tree into the loft all of us were freezing. The snow had made a blanket on the streets.
I rushed ahead, clearing a path for the enormous tree in front of the arched window.
Hawk rested it on the floor, adjusting the tree stand until we all agreed it was straight. He tested it a few times to make sure it wouldn’t fall.
Cameron stood in awe. “Wow. That’s the biggest tree I’ve ever seen.”
“It’s yours. You know that, bud?”
The child circled the tree from one side to the other. “When we put the lights on, I bet they’ll be able to see it from the White House.”
Hawk and I laughed. “Not quite, honey.”
“We need a fire in here,” Hawk offered.
“And some dinner. No one has eaten.” I started for the kitchen, while Hawk worked on the fireplace.
Cameron grabbed a box of lights from the plastic tub of decorations I had hauled over from my house.
I looked out on the living room. At the boys, buried in their own projects. My heart swelled. The tears came easily.
Hawk looked up. “You ok, baby?”
I nodded. “Better than I’ve ever been.”
He left the small flame that had started in the fireplace. He cupped my cheeks with his cold hands. “Good.”
“I don’t know how all this happened.” I let him wipe one of the tears away with his thumb.
“I think it started when you wore a pair of shorts that were too damn short.” He grabbed my ass.
I giggled. “Ok, maybe.”
How had a backroom bar hookup turn into this? There was more love and family in this loft than I’d ever experienced in my life. It was a Christmas card. A movie set. It was my life with Hawk and Cameron.
Cameron stuck out his tongue, trying to untangle one of the strands of lights. I laughed harder.
“Do you see him?”
Hawk shook his head. “Not right now. All I see is a sexy woman that I can’t wait to spend my night with.”
My chest seized with lust and love and something I couldn’t explain. I wanted this man in ways I couldn’t explain.
“After we decorate the tree.” I eyed him.
“It is a school night isn’t it?” he asked.
“Yeah. I have to get up early.”
We were on the other side of the kitchen island. His calloused palm found a sliver of space and slid between my skin and my panties, gripping my bottom roughly. I inhaled sharply.
“Then I’m taking you to bed early, Mia.”
I nodded in agreement. As long as he said the word bed, I was never going to say no. Lying skin to skin. His body moving inside mine. His lips taking mine. His hands canvassing me in heat. It was all I could think about.
“D-dinner,” I stammered. “I have to make dinner.”
“Right.” He removed his hand, dragging it over my skin torturously. “Hey, bud. Need some help with those lights?”
He strolled out of the kitchen and I grabbed the island for support.
Maybe I needed to open a window and let some of the snow inside to cool me off, because from my lips to my core that man had lit me on fire.
36
Crawford
I should have known it would come crashing down. Shit. Why did I think I deserved this? What on earth could have possibly convinced me that happiness was meant for me? I had let my guard down. Way down.
The instant I heard the phone ring at 6am I knew everything was fucked. Call it living with disappointment. Call it growing up without hope. Call it fucking reality.
Mia sat up when I answered the phone.
“Savi, what in the hell are you doing calling me this early?”
Her voice was urgent. “There’s a problem, Crawford.”
“What kind of problem?”
The covers fell from Mia’s body as she leaned toward me, gripping
my arm.
“It’s the boy.”
“What are you talking about?” I was barely awake.
“Maybe I should just come over there. Actually, I’m on my way over now. Sit tight.” She hung up and I stared at a blank phone.
If I thought I could hide the dread on my face, I was wrong. Mia looked as panicked as I felt.
“What’s wrong with Cameron?” she asked.
I shook her off as I climbed out of bed and searched for some damn pants. There was a pit as big as the Grand Canyon spreading through my belly.
“Savi’s on her way over. Get dressed.” I closed the bathroom door behind me and took a breath. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I didn’t know what it was, but it wasn’t good. Savi wouldn’t show up on a Monday morning at the crack of dawn otherwise.
Mia emerged from the bedroom dressed for school. Cameron was still asleep. I wanted it to stay that way until I heard what Savannah had to say.
There was a rap on the door and I immediately pulled her inside.
“What is going on?” My voice bared down on her.
She unwrapped a scarf and heavy coat, while she shook the snow from her gloves. The city was coated in a blanket of white.
“Before I tell you, you need to calm down, Crawford.”
Mia walked next to me. “Good morning, Savi. What’s going on?”
“Hi. It’s not good news I’m afraid. We need to talk.”
“I’ll make some coffee,” Mia offered.
I looked up at the Christmas tree, looming over us. It was decorated with colored lights and paper decorations Cameron had spent half the night making. I’d never had anything in my house like it before. I’d never played Christmas carols or laughed so hard.
And I’d never loved any woman as hard as I did Mia when I took her to bed. It had been on my tongue the entire time. How much I loved her. How much I loved what we had built together. As I grazed her body with my lips it was all I could think about. And when I made her come over and over while it snowed outside I wanted her to know my life was different because of her.
We had this kid now. We had a tree. We had a family. And it was because of her.
My Playboy Fiance Page 60
