Living on the Edge

by Shannon K. Butcher

  Those simple words made the general appear more human than he ever had before in Lucas’s eyes. He could just see the man loving his little girl, tripping over himself to do whatever he could to keep her safe and happy.

  “I regret that I’ve never gotten to know the woman she’s become, but not as much as I would have regretted her never becoming a woman.”

  Sloane’s face appeared in Lucas’s mind. She was brave, strong, capable, and selfless. Sure, she had her rough edges, but that just made getting close to her more of a challenge. More of a prize.

  Lucas knew better than to be thinking about her in those terms, but he couldn’t help it. Ever since last night, he’d looked at her in a different light. He didn’t want to. He knew doing so was only going to cause problems in the long run, but he couldn’t help it.

  “She won’t let me protect her,” said the general. “I’ve made too many mistakes with her—things I can’t take back.”

  “Why wouldn’t she forgive you for saving her when she was a child? I’ve been around her long enough to know that she’s not that cold.”

  “She doesn’t remember. She has no idea what happened to her. I want it to stay that way.”

  “I think she might remember more than you think. You should tell her,” said Lucas. “She has a right to know why you had to send her away.”

  “I promised her mother I wouldn’t. Abigail didn’t want the violence in my life to touch her, even peripherally.”

  “But it already has. It changed the course of her life. I think she has the right to know why.”

  The general’s body sagged, displaying his years in harsh relief. “What’s done is done. I can live with Sloane’s anger as long as she lives.”

  “She’s tougher than you think. She would not be an easy woman to kill.”

  “She’s my baby girl.”

  “No, she’s a grown woman who knows her way around a fight. You’re underestimating her.”

  “You’re underestimating the violence that is just waiting to crash down on her.”

  “I’m telling you she can take care of herself. Sure, I want to keep her safe, too, but if we push her away, then neither one of us is going to be there to watch her back.”

  “You’ve gotten uppity since you left,” said the general. “I’m not sure I like it.”

  “That’s just too bad. I’ve spent a lot of time with Sloane over the past couple of days. I’ve seen her in action. She’s as far from helpless as I am. Maybe more so. Put a little faith in her and she may surprise you.”

  “I don’t want surprises. I want guarantees.”

  “You know as well as I do there are none of those. Life throws shit at you and you have to dodge or find a way to deal.”

  “Are you telling me you’re not willing to help watch out for her anymore?”

  “Of course not. You’d have to lock me up to keep me from going after Gina with Sloane.”

  “That’s all I needed to hear.”

  “I’m not convinced of that, sir, but we’re on the same side. We both want Sloane back home safe and sound. If you stay here, you’re just going to piss her off and get her back up. You’re a distraction she can’t afford.”

  “I threatened her, which was not wise. I know that. But with her, I lose control.”

  That was a sentiment Lucas could easily understand. “That’s why you need to go. Before you drive her away and she does something rash. She’s going back in to save Gina with some folks from her work, and it’s best if she does it in a planned, methodical manner, rather than with the need to prove something to you.”

  “I realize now that I can’t stop her—that I have no right to—but I do have a right to do whatever I can to keep her safe and make sure the job goes well.”

  “Then you need to back down. Call a truce. Give her a peace offering of your trust. Whatever it takes to make sure she comes back out alive.”

  “And just what would you suggest I offer?”

  “Prove to her you trust her enough to do this job by walking away.”

  The general’s mouth tightened as he mulled it over. “If I trust you on this and she gets killed, I’ll be coming after you, son.”

  “If she gets killed, you won’t have to, because they’re only getting to her over my dead body.”

  Sloane sensed her father’s men hovering nearby, on the far side of the natural terrace. They were trying to pretend like they weren’t watching her, but she knew better.

  She ignored them and retrieved Bella’s message stating she would arrive within the hour. It was already early afternoon, and they had a lot of planning to do before they could hit Soma’s villa.

  If it weren’t for the satellite images her father had provided, she wasn’t sure they would have even been able to find the location before sunset. As it was, they knew exactly where it was and approximately how many men guarded it.

  While they were waiting on Bella, they needed to come up with a plan of attack.

  She turned to go back into the bunker for Lucas, and instead came face-to-face with her father. Words dried up in her mouth as they always did when he was near. The air of authority around him created this impenetrable bubble that made her feel like a little girl.

  She hated it, so she thrust her chin up and gave him a defiant stare.

  He reached out and cupped the side of her head. Sloane flinched away, unsure what game he was playing. She looked at his hand, expecting to find a hypodermic needle or something else to knock her out and drag her home, but saw none.

  “Sloane, you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to go.”

  “Stop right there,” she told him. “You’re wasting your breath and my time. I have a mission to complete and I’m sure you have all kinds of pressing things demanding your attention.”

  “And you’re one of them. I worry about you.”

  “Then stop. I don’t need your worry. I’m fine without it. Or you, as I always have been.”

  His eyes drooped shut for a brief moment. “I wish things could have been different between us.”

  Her throat was beginning to tighten, and she felt the telltale sting of tears burning her eyes—tears she could not show. She willed away the sign of weakness and said, “So do I, but it’s too late for that. Carry on, General.”

  Sloane walked past him before she completely broke down. She hated it that he could do that to her—that he could make her feel things she didn’t want to feel and want things she didn’t want to want. She was a grown woman. Strong and independent. She didn’t need him.

  Then why did she so desperately want his approval? It shouldn’t matter what he thought. She’d proven herself time and time again. And she knew he’d kept tabs on her over the years. Why couldn’t he tell her he was proud of her? Why did he have to insist that she wasn’t good enough to go and rescue her friend—not good enough for him?

  “I hate it that things are like this between us,” he said from behind her.

  She stiffened and quickly pulled herself together. “So do I. But they are. Neither one of us is very good at bending. I think it’s best if we just stay out of each other’s way.”

  “I’m going. I’m leaving two of my men here, along with some supplies.”

  That shocked her enough that she spun around. “You’re not going to fight me? Force me to leave?”

  Sadness seemed to weigh him down, dulling his green eyes. “I’m tired of fighting with you. Lucas says you’re capable. I’m taking him at his word.”

  Lucas had stood up for her? Sloane hid her shock, worried this was all some kind of strategy to get her to give in. “I’m sure he’ll let you know when we’re back in the States. You won’t have to worry that way.”

  He gave her a sad smile. “There are some things I can’t control. Worrying about my baby girl is one of them. But I will feel better knowing you’re back safe and sound.”

  He really wasn’t going to fight her on this. Sloane had no idea what to make of it. All she could think
was that Lucas must have had the magic words she’d never been able to find to make her father back down.

  “Thank you,” she managed to say, her tone polite to cover her shock, “for the intel and leaving the men behind. I appreciate your help getting Gina home safely.”

  “If you need anything else, please call me.”

  Sloane was reeling, searching for a hold on reality. This was not the father she knew. He didn’t use words like “please.” He gave orders and expected obedience.

  “O-okay,” she stammered.

  He put his big hand on her shoulder and gave her a single squeeze before he walked away.

  Three men she hadn’t seen watching her melted out of the jungle and joined him. At least he had an escort back to wherever it was he was going.

  Sloane stood there and watched him until he disappeared. She wasn’t sure what to make of this new side of her father. She didn’t recognize this man and it left her feeling oddly unsettled.

  Was it his age? Had he finally come to grips with the fact that he wasn’t immortal? Or was it simply a case of him mellowing?

  She had no idea. This whole situation was too surreal. She was left feeling off-balance.

  She wanted to see Lucas again. He made her feel steady, and maybe he could shed some light on her father’s odd change of heart.

  She went back into the bunker, where Lucas was leaning over a satellite image spread out on the desk.

  “What did you say to him?” she asked.

  Lucas turned around, propping his hips against the edge of the desk. He crossed his thick arms over his chest. “Not much. I told him you knew what you were doing. That he should trust you.”

  “And it worked?”

  “He’s not the man you think he is. He’s a hard-ass, but he has his reasons. Maybe you should sit down and ask him about them sometime, rather than assuming he’s doing something for some sinister purpose.”

  He made it sound like he knew something she didn’t. “What did he tell you?”

  Lucas turned his back on her and went back to the map. “Ask him yourself.”

  “He’s gone.”

  “I guess you’ll have to look him up when we’re back home, then.”

  Right. Like that would happen. “If you know something, you should tell me.”

  He stuffed the images in a folder and turned back to her. “Nope. But I will introduce you to the men your father left to help us.”

  The change of subject was intentional. She could tell. “You’re just trying to get the two of us to make up. It’s not going to happen, you know. The gap between us is too wide.”

  Lucas closed the distance until he was standing right in front of her—close enough she could smell the soap on his skin. He looked down at her, his face completely serious. “Then build a bridge, Sloane. He’s your father. He won’t always be around. One of these days it’ll be too late to have any kind of relationship with him and you’ll be sorry.”

  Sloane knew what he meant, but she couldn’t let herself think about it. Not here. Not now. Anger was easier. Losing Mom had nearly destroyed her. As much as she disliked her father, she couldn’t imagine a world without him.

  She lifted her chin. “I think it’s best if we focus on the task at hand. I’ll deal with my problems on my own.”

  His mouth turned down in disappointment. “No, you won’t. You’ll keep ignoring it once it’s not right in your face.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Fine. Prove it, then. Once we get back home you show me you’re willing to sit down with your father and have a civil discussion.”

  Now Sloane was the one who was disappointed. “We both know that once we get home our lives will no longer intersect.”

  “Is that your way of avoiding him or me?”

  “Neither. It’s just the truth.”

  “Truth?” he asked, raising a dark brow. “I’ll show you truth.”

  And then he kissed her. She fell into it headlong, abandoning reality for the swift, fiery heat that blazed between them. Everything else fell away, and all that remained was the hard grip of Lucas’s hands on her body and the taste of him against her tongue. The world shifted and spun out from under her, and she gripped his shoulders, seeking some kind of anchor to hold her in place.

  Lucas lifted his head, staring down into her eyes. “The truth is that you hated me from the beginning because of who you thought I was. You were wrong about me. Maybe you’re wrong about other things, too.”

  He pulled away and went outside to join the other men, giving Sloane a few moments to gather the fragile pieces of herself.

  She had no idea what had passed between Lucas and her father in the few minutes they were together, but whatever it was, it had changed both of them somehow. Her father had lost some of his ruthlessness, but somewhere along the way, Lucas had found it.

  Which only convinced her further that they could never have a future together. It was best if she cut ties now, while she still could. Heaven knew she had one powerful distraction.

  Saving Gina was going to take all her focus. Once they were back home she’d let herself think about what could have been, what she was missing. But right now was not the time for regrets. She needed to pull herself together and get the job done.

  So that was what she’d do.

  Sloane wiped the taste of Lucas from her lips and squared her shoulders before she went out to meet the men.

  By the time she got outside, Lucas and the two other men were grouped together in a tight clump. She didn’t know what orders these men were under, but she wasn’t about to trust them enough to leave them alone for long.

  Lucas heard her approach and lifted his head. His gaze was cool as he looked at her, and she found herself wishing for some of that heat he’d given her only a few hours ago.

  “Sloane, I’d like you to meet Victor Temple.”

  Victor nodded as he eyed her, sizing her up. He looked refined, almost aristocratic. He was incredibly handsome and clean-cut, with a nice, straight nose that Bella would enjoy breaking given the chance. His hair was cut short but not quite buzzed, and he stood with the rigid posture of a man born into the military. He held out his hand, which Sloane shook, noting the calluses along his palm.

  Victor might look all cultured and elegant, but he was clearly not a stranger to physical labor.

  “And this is Justin Hoyt,” said Lucas.

  Justin gave her a nod and a wink. His hair was a bit too long and shaggy, and he needed a shave. He wasn’t overly tall, though he had plenty of muscle. His eyes and hair were both an average kind of brown, but his nondescript looks would make it easy for him to blend in just about anywhere. “So you’re really the general’s daughter?”

  Sloane lifted a brow and gave him a cool smile. “The less you mention that, the better you and I will get along.”

  “Leave the lady be,” warned Victor. “We were ordered not to upset her.”

  “Upset me?” asked Sloane, feeling her face heat with fury. “Do I look like a troubled child or an old lady?”

  Victor’s rigid posture tightened. “Sorry, ma’am. I didn’t intend to insult you.”

  Sloane stepped up to him. She got right in his face, but his gaze didn’t waver. He stared straight ahead at something in the distance, standing at attention as if she somehow wielded her father’s authority over him.

  “Did the general order you to take me home, too?” she demanded. “Did he give you permission to knock me out or drug me?”

  “No, ma’am.”

  “Sloane,” said Lucas in a placating tone, “don’t take your anger out on them.”

  She turned back to Lucas, feeling herself quiver with anger. “I have a right to know if my father told them to do something against my will.”

  Lucas grabbed her arms and his jaw tightened. He dropped his voice, but the rage straining his tone was unmistakable. “I heard your father give them their orders. You want to know what he told them? He told them to protect y
ou at all costs. He basically told them to die for you if that’s what it took to get you home safe.”

  Die for her?

  Sloane’s anger evaporated, leaving her feeling selfish, deflated, and shaky. Lucas was right. It wasn’t fair for her to take years of frustration out on these men any more than it was fair of him to ask them to put her life above theirs.

  She eased her arms from Lucas’s grip and went to where Victor was still standing at attention. “I’m sorry,” she told him. “Perhaps I should try this again.”

  She put her hand out for him to shake. “I’m Sloane Gideon and I’m not a complete whack job. Most of the time.”

  Victor shook her hand, giving her a brief, rigid nod.

  Justin asked her, “Are you married?”

  She blinked in surprise at the change of subject. “What?”

  “Your last name is Gideon. Not Norwood like the Old Man. I thought that might mean you were married, which means Lucas really needs to stop looking at you like that.”

  Years-old shame bore down on her, and it was all she could do to keep her head high. “I use my mother’s maiden name.”

  “But your folks were married, right?” asked Justin.

  “Drop it, Hoyt,” warned Lucas. “Focus on the map, not Sloane.”

  Thankful for the change in subject, Sloane latched onto it like a lifeline. “We’re meeting up with the rest of my team before we go in. I want to be clear who’s in charge here.”

  Both men looked to Lucas, who crossed his arms over his chest. “It’s her mission.”

  Sloane wanted to kiss him on the mouth. His vote of confidence and the ease with which he handed her control was as humbling as it was shocking. Still, she knew what she had to do to ensure her friend got out safely.

  She cleared her throat. “Actually, Lucas is in charge. He’s got a lot more experience in combat and extractions than I do. Most of my work is as a protective detail.”