“I guess we’ll still be sisters.” Reagan grinned, lacing her arm with Kensie’s.
Kensie did her best to control her emotions. “I really hope so.” She smiled. “Let’s get you married.”
The intimate ceremony took place in front of a hundred of Reagan’s and Liam’s closest friends and family. White lights and blush-colored roses were dotted throughout the garden, as soft and as feminine as the bride herself.
A hundred faces in the crowd and Kensie found Carter’s from across the room. He stared at her with lust and love and adoration and she stared back at him with matched intensity. It was like they were in their own world, listening as the minister recited the vows.
“Do you, Liam, take Reagan as your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death parts you?”
Carter mouthed, “I do,” and it nearly knocked the wind out of her.
“Do you, Reagan, take Liam as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death parts you?”
“I do,” Kensie mouthed back to the tattooed rocker who made her knees weak. In that space, in their bubble, neither time nor perspective nor past nor present existed. They were frozen, lost in each other’s eyes. Bound by their unofficial promise, for better or for worse.
“You may now kiss your bride.”
The minister announced the newest Mr. and Mrs. Knight and the crowd erupted in cheers as two by two, the wedding party made their way back down the center aisle. After pictures, everyone made their way back to the garden for the reception.
“My little brother has been in love with the girl next door for as long as I can remember,” Trey’s speech began. He paused, loosening his bow tie. Kensie wondered if everyone else could see the sadness hiding behind his eyes. She did that, she broke him. Guilt prickled at her scalp. Trey may have been a lot of things, but it didn’t rinse away the blood on her hands. She could have told him she was unhappy. She never wanted to hurt him and, in the end, she destroyed him. She’d have to pay for her sins, just like Trey was paying for his. Karma had a long memory, and there was no statute of limitations on infidelity.
“They were fourteen when he finally found the nerve to ask her out. He’d been in love with her since infancy. Everyone could see it but you, little sister,” he teased, looking down at Reagan. She blushed before turning to her new husband, love pouring out of her every cell.
“He found out some jerk from the football team was planning on asking her to homecoming. He spent the entire day working up the courage to ask her first. I thought he was going to wear a hole in the carpet, he was pacing so much.” This elicited a low rumble of laughter from the crowd who hung on Trey’s every word. “He worried about how he’d do it, or if she’d say no, or if he was too late, then Carter,” Trey paused, regret, anger, and sadness flashed on his face, as he recalled the memory, “Carter threw a book at him and said, go get your girl before I kick your ass. Suddenly, it was like a calm washed over him, and he marched over there, and he did it. Reagan never stood a chance.”
Kensie smiled from her spot at the end of the main table. The garden, deep in the vineyard behind the hotel, looked like it was ripped out of a fairy tale. She scanned the rows of round tables and beautiful people, all who screamed wealth and privilege, looking for her other half.
The three tattooed guys in suits were easy to find. Even off stage, their presence was electric—they drew you in—hard and soft, perfect and flawed, clean and dirty, all at the same time.
Trey’s voice faded into the background as Kensie watched them. Ryder’s arm was draped lazily around Jamie’s shoulder, his burgundy suit tailored to fit his long lean body like a second skin. He looked every bit the unaffected rockstar that he was. With the smoking-hot blonde on his arm, he was king.
Javi, The Joker, the playful one, wore a gray pinstriped suit and his signature grin. The jacket hung over the back of his chair, and the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up midway to his forearm, exposing the black and white ink on his arm. His gaze, intense despite his smile, trained on Quinn.
Then there was Carter, her Carter, dressed head to toe in all black. The only visible colors were those of the reds and blues and greens that swirled on his hands and peeked up through the collar of his dress shirt. The sight of him in a suit made her feel things for him she didn’t think were still possible. His presence had been such a constant in her life this past month that she’d almost become numb to how handsome he was. She’d grown accustomed to it, but seeing him all cleaned up, looking as dapper as any one of the Ivy League-educated groomsmen in attendance, sent a shiver down her spine and a rush of moisture to her panties.
Her teeth found her bottom lip, and her thighs pressed together as heat pulsated through her body. She was staring, unabashedly so, taking comfort in the fact that everyone’s attention was focused on Trey as he spoke fondly of his little brother.
Just when she finally convinced herself to look away, his head turned, and his blues found hers. It was as if he could sense her arousal from the other side of the garden, because she certainly recognized his. She’d know that look anywhere, from any distance. That face haunted her dreams, the one he wore when he spotted her in the crowd at the Rabbit Hole that night and the one he wore as he fucked her against the bathroom stall at Silo. He looked at her like she was a cool drink on a hot day, shelter from the storm, and Christmas morning all wrapped into one. It was pure lust, all physical, all sexual. His gaze made her core spasm.
Carter tipped his head toward the exit. She nodded her agreement ever so slightly. He stood first, bending down to whisper something into Javi’s ear. The guitarist grinned and looked over at Kensie, before extending his hand to his friend, his brother. Carter shook it, pulling Javi in for a quick hug, before he stood and walked back towards the hotel, disappearing into the shadows.
Kensie counted to fifty in her head, before leaning over and whispering to Quinn, “I’ll be right back.” Then she stood as gracefully as possible and followed in the same direction.
The garden was bigger than she remembered, or the lust was clouding her judgment, she wasn’t sure. Her legs pushed her forward, looking for the man in black. She kept going, further and further, until finally, she spotted him in the courtyard. He was sitting on the edge of the fountain. His elbows rested on his knees, his hands were steepled in front of his lips, as he watched her approach.
“You look amazing. I want to rip that dress off you and fuck you right here.” He swallowed hard, his voice strained as he took her in. The sequined dress shone in the setting Napa sun. She was a goddess placed there for him.
“You don’t look half-bad yourself.” She grinned. Her fingers raked through his hair, eliciting a low growl from his throat.
“I love when you do that,” he moaned, wrapping his arms around her waist. He pulled her in between his legs, resting his forehead on her midsection.
“And I love you,” she said, bringing her other hand to his head, tugging gently. They stayed like that for a few minutes, soaking in the beauty of their surroundings and of the moment. She played with his hair, he caressed the exposed skin on her back, neither in a hurry to break the spell.
“Is this how you picture our wedding?” he asked after a few minutes.
“No,” she replied, scratching behind his ears. In truth, she’d never pictured her wedding. She knew she wanted to get married, but she always figured that’s what wedding planners were for.
“No?” Carter’s brows shot up in surprise. “How then?”
“I don’t want the circus.”
“Every princess wants the fairy tale.”
“How do you picture it?” she asked, amused. She didn’t take her rockstar boyfriend for the romantic type, but then again, weddings brought out the inner romantic in even the coldest hearts.
“Just me
and you. Maybe Vegas?” His eyes glazed over like he could see the day clearly in his mind.
“Sounds good to me.”
“Yeah, right,” he snorted, “what about Kitty Cat? Your mom and dad?”
“Well, maybe our parents can come, provided they have their shit together by then.”
“Mine will, but yours,” his head tilted back, and his face scrunched up, “I don’t know.”
“They’ll come around,” she assured him, tracing his bottom lip with her tongue. “I don’t think anyone can resist you.”
“You tried,” he said, catching her tongue with his teeth. He bit her gently, then kissed her sweetly.
“Ha,” she scoffed, “you fucked me the first day we met.”
“That’s because you liked this,” he pointed to his face, “not because you liked me.”
“Maybe a little, and your body, your body’s pretty hot too,” she giggled.
“But you couldn’t stand me,” he challenged, arching his brow.
“I fucking hated you.”
“When did it change?”
“Liam’s party.”
Carter winced, pulling her down on his lap. “I’m sorry.”
“Water under the bridge.” She shrugged. “But that wasn’t when it changed. Being in the same place with both you and Trey made me realize I had to make a choice and I knew it was you. I think I always knew. I’m stubborn, just like my daddy.”
“Why me?”
“The entire time Trey was kissing me and touching me and holding me, I wished it were you. I hated that you had to see that. I wanted nothing more than to leave with you. I thought it was guilt keeping me there, but it was fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of getting hurt.”
“But I did hurt you.”
“Yes, and it sucked. Don’t ever do that shit again,” she warned, holding his gaze.
“I swear it. You’re it for me, Friend.”
“I realized something. I was holding on to Trey so tightly because he was safe, but I couldn’t let fear control me anymore. I’ve spent my entire life dreaming, and then you came along, and those dreams became reality. Perfection is a fallacy. I’m not perfect, I’m insecure and needy. I like messy buns and sleeping in and I fucking love bacon. I can’t be Trey’s perfect little wife. I don’t want to be. I want you, with your tattoos and your devil dick and your dirty mouth. I want to soar with you.”
“Marry me.”
“Yeah, right,” she giggled, doing her best to ignore the swell in her chest.
“Marry. Me.”
“You’re serious?” He couldn’t be, could he?
“Before the tour.”
Kensie’s heart stopped. Time stopped. Life stopped. Part of her was crazy enough to marry him tomorrow, but she didn’t know if that part was co-dependent Kensie or madly-in-love Kensie. “Let’s just get through this wedding.”
“I think I know a way to make you more agreeable,” he whispered into her collarbone.
Ahem. The clearing of a throat pulled them back to reality, back to the wedding. Kensie stood, putting distance between her and Carter. They were getting careless. “I don’t mean to interrupt, but they’re almost ready for you,” Penelope said, looking at her son like she was trying to solve a mystery.
“This isn’t over,” Carter murmured.
“You’re out of your mind.” She smiled at the ground. His mother’s presence made her nervous, especially after their run-in at the spa.
“No, I’m madly in love,” he corrected, lifting her chin. His mouth found hers and she opened to him.
Ahem. Penelope cleared her throat again.
Reluctantly, he pulled away from Kensie and went to his mother. Wrapping her in his arms, he lifted her off her feet and swung her around. “Carter, put me down!” she laughed.
“Protect my heart, Mother,” he said, looking back at Kensie.
“Always, dear, always. You just have to talk to me.” Love and adoration shone in her eyes as he set her on her feet and retreated back through the grapevines.
“I want to apologize for yesterday,” Penelope began. “It’s just, the only thing I’d ever heard about you was in connection to Trey. Then my daughter calls me devastated about how Liam is so angry with her for making him lie to his brother and, well, it wasn’t the best first impression.”
“I don’t mean to be rude, really, but it isn’t anyone else’s business. I’m here because Reagan needed a favor. We’re doing our best to be discreet.”
“Are you really? Because I just walked in on the two of you in a very compromising position.”
“It’s hard for him, putting on this show to protect Trey’s feelings. He only agreed to keep us a secret for your daughter, but we are trying.”
“What happened back then?” Penelope asked, her eyes imploring.
“It isn’t my place to say.”
“Please help me understand. I just miss my son.” Desperation infiltrated every surface of Penelope’s face. Her son, her baby boy, could barely stand to come home for holidays. After ten years, the distance was starting to take its toll.
“I can’t.”
“Is it over a girl?”
“No.”
“Money?”
“No, Mrs. Thayer.”
“Kensington, please. I’m begging you.”
“Okay,” she said, taking a seat on the edge of the fountain. Kensie hated to betray Carter’s trust, but she also didn’t think it was fair that everyone suffered because of Annabelle and Trey. “Do you remember why Carter got into trouble?”
“Of course,” Penelope said, sitting next to her. “He destroyed his classmate’s car. The damage was in the thousands. It was all John could do to keep him out of jail until after graduation. It was a really tough time for us.”
“Sure, but do you know why he did it?”
“No. He was always getting into fights. He used to have such a short fuse that anything would set him off. We were at our wits’ end with his behavior. Nothing surprised us. But what does one thing have to do with the other? Was Trey involved?”
“More than involved,” Kensie nodded, “Carter wasn’t even there.”
“But that doesn’t make sense. Carter confessed. He had the bat in his room.”
“He confessed because he was protecting his friend. He knew no one would question him being responsible, he was the fuck-up and he was taking a gap year anyway.”
“So, why the fallout?”
“Because after Carter spent a year in jail so that Trey could follow his dreams, his mother decided that Carter wasn’t good enough. The woman who you think is your friend, told her son to cut the trash out of his life, and he listened.”
“Annabelle? Why?’” Horror took center stage as Penelope searched through her memories looking for clues.
“You’d have to ask her.”
“Why didn’t Carter say anything to us? We all assumed…”
“That he did something wrong,” Kensie finished, her tone harsher than she intended it to be.
“I know how it sounds, but you didn’t know him when he was younger.” A myriad of emotions shone in Penelope’s eyes, regret chief among them. Regret for not recognizing the self-loathing that haunted her middle child. Regret for perpetuating those insecurities, regret for being closer over the last ten years to the people who’d wronged her child than she was with her son.
“I know his heart and I know he’s still hurting. It’s easier for him to stay away. Deep down, buried under all the anger and resentment, he misses his friend. He told me he couldn’t take his family from him. That’s the man you raised. That’s the man I fell in love with.”
The sound of a piano in the distance caught Kensie’s attention. She recognized the faint melody as the one she’d heard that day in the studio. “I’m going to head back.”
“He’s lucky to have you, Kensington. We all are.”
Kensie smiled sadly, leaving the woman alone to process.
Reagan and Liam stood on t
he dance floor, their arms wrapped around each other as they swayed to the music.
There were three stools up on the stage. Carter sat in the center, flanked by Javi and Ryder. His hands clung to the microphone stand as he sang her song for his sister and her new husband.
You walking into the bar with stars in your eyes, I knew I was in trouble then, brown-haired girl, red silk hugging your thighs
One night,
It’s what I told myself.
One night with you
It was never supposed to last you and I, we were meant to crash, you took my world by surprise, in one night, you opened my eyes.
Kensie watched through blurry eyes as the man of her dreams, her Peter Pan, professed his undying love in front of his friends and family. Her heart was full as the tears fell uncontrollably. Nothing else mattered. The snare kicked in, then the bass, then the horns, and finally the three men on stage sang out,
You’re the place between sleep and awake I dream of you always, my happiest thing, you gave me wings.
I spent my entire life chasing Neverland,
Found it in the brown-eyed girl who makes me so high I fear I’ll never land.
Was a lost boy before you, Wendy,
You inspired me to be a man.
You’re the place between sleep and awake
There I’ll wait for you
My best friend
My lover
My Forever.
“It’s him, isn’t it? Carter?” Trey asked. He was standing in front of her, a tumbler of something dark and strong in his hand. “You left me for Carter fucking Thayer.”
“I…I don’t…I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kensie stuttered, shaking her head. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening. She closed her eyes, willing herself to breathe. She needed to stay calm. They’d been careful—mostly—there’s no way he could know.
“Don’t treat me like an idiot, and for fuck’s sake, stop with the lies,” Trey seethed, inches from her face. His brown eyes narrowed in on her, his rage so palpable she felt it bone deep. Gone was the hopeful man who proposed to her just two days prior, and in his place stood a bitter, jilted ex-lover looking for revenge.
Lithium Tides: A Lithium Springs Novel Page 24
