by Jenny Wood
“Hey, guys!” She chirps, “I’ll need you to put these on and sanitize your hands right here.” She points to the wall where the hanging sanitizer dispenser is hanging. We don’t know dally, and we do what she says.
“I bet you all are excited, huh? Two babies? Are they girls or boys? Or both?” She asks, seeming genuinely curious instead of just asking to make conversation as we slip the papery clothing on over our clothes and shoes.
“A girl and a boy.” Morgan beams at her, pulling on a paper cap.
“Exciting!” She almost squeals. She’s not acting as if things are dire, so I try to calm my racing heart. I’d been relatively calm up until this point, but now I feel like my legs might not hold me up, they’re shaking so bad.
“Ready?” Bree asks impatiently, already dressed in head to toe in her gear. Morgan and I nod as he grabs my hand and we walk into this beautiful chaos together.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Baby, they’re here.” Bree been lined to Haley where she’s lying on a table with everything already in place. Her hands are out to her sides, and it looks medieval. There’s a drape to hide the procedure, and I send up a silent thanks for that.
“Hey, guys,” Haley says quietly, her teeth chattering like she’s freezing. I look to the doctors to see if anyone is paying attention, surely that isn’t normal.
“You okay?” Morgan asks just as soft. She nods but doesn’t look convincing.
“I’m scared.” She answers, silent tears running down her temple and into her hair. Bree leans forward and kisses her forehead, whispering encouraging words to calm her. Morgan and I try to stand back and stay out of everyone’s way, but seeing her scared and shaking, I feel like I need to go to her. So I do.
Bree looks unsure as she scoots around to the other side of Haley’s head and I grab a nearby stool from several feet away. I pull it over to us and take a seat right next to Haley’s head. I grab her cold and clammy hand in mind and cover it with my warmth.
“Come here, baby.” I reach around in search of Morgan. He’s there in a heartbeat. I turn back to Haley as Morgan curls into my lap. “This is a scary thing, I know. It’s scary for us too.” I try to smile encouragingly. “But you aren’t alone, we’re here, and we aren’t going anywhere, no matter what. Okay?” She nods and takes a shaky breath. Morgan, I notice has his hand in Bree’s and his other hand stroking Haley’s hair, she seems to calm with us all around her.
“Alright, honey; you’re going to feel a lot of tugging and maybe some pressure, but nothing will hurt. It’ll be uncomfortable, but not painful, okay? Like we talked about.” The doctor interrupts our moment and starts explaining what he’s going to do. He seems young for a doctor, but Cameron assured us that he was good.
“You should’ve been around for the epidural. That was fun.” Bree teased and leaned down to kiss Haley’s lips. Haley scoffed, and her eyes got huge as something the doctor was doing behind the curtain that I was once again thankful that I couldn’t see. Morgan looked down at me, and I could see the blinding hope, excitement and unadulterated fear in his gaze. He was smiling though, so I took the second to kiss him. I’d never get tired of kissing him.
“Oh, that doesn’t feel good at all.” Haley squeezes my hand as her body jerks just slightly on a groan. Morgan is still running his fingers through her hair, but Bree and I are holding her hands tightly, giving her our strength. I can’t imagine how scary this is for her because it’s scary as hell to me. It’s just after midnight, and I can’t help the smile that overtakes my face because I realize the babies birthday will be today; April 3rd.
“Okay parents, it looks like the first one up, is….baby boy!” The doctor says excitedly, holding up a tinier than life baby, covered in blood and goo. His face is all scrunched up, and he looks like a wilted potato; still, I’ve never seen anything more beautiful. Haley closes her eyes as Morgan bursts into tears. Bree looks uncomfortable, and I’m just in awe. The doctor hands the baby off to a nurse waiting with heated towels, and it’s the longest minute of my life before we hear the ear-splitting scream of our boy.
“Oh, King.” Morgan sobs, grabbing my face as he beams.
“He’s so loud.” I smile in amazement; my heart is feeling seconds away from jumping out of my chest.
“How you doin’ Mama?” I ask Haley, but she keeps her eyes tightly closed and only nods. Her face is scrunched up tight, and I can tell she’s trying not to cry.
“Breathe, honey. It’s okay.” I whisper to her. Her eyes fly open as she looks at me. “Don’t think about anything, not right now. Okay? You’re okay, the baby is okay, and we’ve got one more to bring into the world. You’re doing it.” I smile, trying to encourage her. I’d give anything to know what she’s thinking but yet scared to death to know.
“Who’s ready for baby number two?” The doctor says, arms working overtime at whatever he’s doing. The nurses haven’t said a word, but they smile over at us every once in a while.
“Breathe, baby. It’s almost over.” Bree whispers, kissing Haley every few seconds. Haley takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, just as the doctor holds up another wrinkly, smushed face, angry, screaming baby.
“Congratulations! It’s a girl! Baby one, born at twelve-twenty-one, baby two born at twelve-thirty=three; April 3rd, 2017. Great day for a birthday, isn’t it?” He smiles at us all, handing the baby to another waiting nurse with a towel, waiting to take the baby to get cleaned up.
“You did it!” Morgan whispers to Haley, she nods but doesn’t answer. Bree looks relieved but still uncomfortable, and Haley looks tense and scared.
“Alright, here’s baby boy, you want me to put him on your chest, Mommy?” The nurse brings
“NO!” She screams hysterically, shaking her head back and forth violently. To say it shocks us all would be an understatement, it scared the hell out of me.
“I can’t. I can't do it. Please.” She begs, eyes closed, refusing to look at the baby. The nurse looks taken aback, but she ushers the baby away.
“Go, Morgan, you go. I can’t do it.” She sobs, body-wracking sobs as she explains. Morgan kisses her forehead and looks at me with troubled eyes as he slides from my lap and crosses the room to the baby boy.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Haley chants to both me and Bree and I have a feeling that neither of us knows what she’s apologizing for. Still, we stay beside her silently holding her hands, while the doctor sews her up. The sudden sickness to my stomach has me wanting to rush to the bathroom, I have the most awful feeling, and I pray that I’m wrong. This can’t be happening again.
Morgan
“Can I hold him?” I ask the nurse who just took the baby away. She turns and looks back at Haley, but nobody is paying attention.
“He weighs six pounds, seven ounces.” She smiles, handing him over. Six pounds and he feels like nothing at all. His skin is an angry looking red, but I imagine it’s from rubbing him down to clean him off. He’s eyes are closed, and his forehead is squished together but just peeking out of his little cap is the lightest, blonde fuzz. His lips pucker up in a puckered face yawn and crusty skin and all, I haul him up my chest to kiss them. He’s gorgeous. The most perfect little boy I’ve ever seen. My heart bursts with love for him already, and I wonder how shit like that happens.
“Here’s Little Miss. She weighs five pounds, two ounces.” The same nurse says to me as she guides me to a small stool and has me sit so she can hand me the girl. I try not to think of their names; I try not imagine them being mine because nothing is set in stone yet. But, looking at her smooth, golden looking skin and dark black head of straight hair, I fall in love with her too.
“Baby,” Kingsley says, standing over me; eyes locked on these babies. I see his heart break in front of my eyes. No, this can’t happen. I can’t do this again.
“Can I hold one?” He asks me, eyes shiny and
bright. I nod, unable to speak and he grabs the closest one to him, which is the boy.
“Hey, big guy.” He whispers, stroking his bigger than an average finger and sliding it down the baby’s nose and over his lips. “He’s something else,” Kingsley comments, looking over at me with the girl. “She’s beautiful.” He smiles, sadly.
“What aren’t you telling me?” I ask, giving in to my fear and needing to know. He shakes his head but doesn’t look at me.
“They’re going to get Haley to a room.” He says, and I look over. Bree is looking over at us, and I can’t read her face. It’s blank. I try for a smile, but I know it’s not all there. I can’t do this again.
“I can’t do this again, Kingsley. I love them so much, already. I want to run out these doors and just take them home.” I tell him, brokenly. I’m terrified of what he’s not telling me.
“Time to break this up for just a little bit. We need to get baths and clothed and tests, and it won’t take no time at all.” The nurse says, checking the little bracelets around their little feet that they put on, practically the minute they came out. Another nurse steps forward and asks for our wrists and promptly locks them around our wrists as well.
“Nurse Minnie over there will get you guys to your room. The mother has requested the babies not be in her room. I understand you’re the adoptive fathers, so we’ll get you set up in a private room where you can stay until they’re cleared to go home. If you want to update your family or go have a cup of coffee or something, I can come find you the minute they get into their room.” The slightly older, motherly looking nurse says to us, face full of warmth and pride. We’re the adoptive fathers.
“We’re the adoptive fathers,” I repeated in a pained whisper. Kingsley inhales a sharp breath, and I can’t stop, for the second time in as many hours, the sob that rips from my throat. We’re the adoptive fathers. The nurses take our babies, and I’m engulfed in Kingsley’s arms as I cry.
We’re the adoptive fathers.
All of our friends are spread out in the small waiting area just at the end of the hall. Hand in hand, smile’s splitting our faces; they notice us just as we enter the room. Kayson and Conner jump up first; followed by Jody and Cameron, Jase and Joker, Foster and to our happy surprise, Merissa, and Kady.
“How are they?”
“Are they here?”
“How’s Haley?”
“Is everyone okay?” Everyone asked questions at once.
“They’re beautiful.” Kingsley’s voice breaks and I squeeze his hand earning a beautiful smile.
“Our girl was five pounds, and our boy was six. He’s twenty-two inches long; she was nineteen and a half. He has blonde peach fuzz on his head, and she has a head full of black hair. It sticks straight up, like Kramer.” I giggle, thinking of her crazy little head the second I took her cap off.
“When can we see them? Did you take pictures?” Kayson asks. We didn’t; we didn’t even think to. We just experienced it. We’ll take plenty when we get back to our rooms. King tells them that and they all surround us with hugs and congratulations.
“Is this time, I mean, do you think everything is okay this time around?” Cameron asks quietly, while Kingsley is explaining the process in every detail from start to finish after we’d walked into the room.
“I hope so. Cam, I love them so much it feels like my chest is going to explode. I want to hunt them down right now and be close to them; it’s killing me.” I tell him honestly. To be honest, I’m scared like nothing else I’ve ever been scared of before because I don’t know what happened there at the end.
“How’s Haley? Did she seem to be leaning any which way?” He asks, guiding me to a chair while we both sit.
“The nurse tried to hand her the baby, and she screamed. She was adamant that she didn’t want to hold him. It scared me. Bree just looks weirded out by everything. She doesn’t talk much, just supports Haley.” I tell him honestly.
“Kennedy Daddies?” A nurse interrupts our celebration and calls for us. Kingsley walks to me and grasps my hand. “We have your room, if you and your friends want to follow us, you’re more than welcome to wait in there until we get the babies all ready to meet everyone.” She smiles, obviously loving this part of her job. I take a deep breath and look up at my husband, and he beams right back at me. We both nod and with our family in tow, we go to our room.
While we were waiting, I tried to make my way over to Haley’s room to see how she was feeling. Bree opened the door when I knocked quietly and said that Haley was sleeping; that they’d given her something for pain and she’d fallen right to sleep. She looked as though, she’d been crying, but she had a smile on her face when she told me she’d come find me when she woke up. I agreed, though I really hoped to be able to talk to her myself.
The babies were brought in after about an hour, and everyone got to meet Wyatt King and Gracie Joy. The guys went nuts, fighting over who was going to be called what, and who was going to be the favorite.
“Mom would be so proud of you, King.” I heard Kayson whisper to my husband when his arms were full of baby Gracie. They’d put their heads together, sitting close and cooed at the little girl. I saw them both tearing up, so I gave them their moment. I prayed that nothing would go wrong because watching our friends and family with these little ones, I’d never wanted anything more than to keep this.
The nurses kicked the guys out around four that morning, telling them all to go get some rest and they could come back at visiting hours in a few hours. I knew that they wouldn’t open the shop today and Kayson and Jody would have to reschedule and put a sign on the door that said, CLOSED FOR TWINS!! Kayson was excited to tell any and every one who’d listen. I wondered how long it’d be before he and Conner had a few of their own.
“Knock-knock” A nurse peaked her head in just after eight that morning. Kingsley was in the bed with Wyatt while I was rocking Gracie, giving her a bottle. “You have a Mr. Kinzer here to see you. Could I let him in?” She asks. Kingsley propped a pillow up on the side of Wyatt, even though there was no way he’d roll away; but his body knifed up and turned towards the door, just as Murphy Kinzer, our adoption specialist came in.
“Hey.” He said softly, smiling at both of us and the babies. “How you guys are holding up?”
“Good,” Kingsley answered. “Worried, nervous. Scared as shit.” He tells him honestly. Murphy seemed to understand, nodding as he did anyway.
“Well, I’ve got some papers to finalize. You guys up for that?” He asks, pulling off his messenger bag from around his chest and sitting it on the table.
“We haven’t talked to Haley, have you spoken with her?” I ask, wondering again, why I haven’t got to see her since we left the O.B. surgical room.
“I have, I was just in her room.” He says sadly. He sits in the chair at the small table and looks at us. I go stand closer to Kingsley, afraid of the look on Murphy’s face. He smiles a sad smile but shakes himself off and pulls out folders and stacks of papers as well as three ink pens.
“I have a letter for the both of you, as well as one for each child. Haley has asked that she have no further contact with you or the children. The letters should explain.” He slides three letters across the table, but neither of us seems to be able to move. “She asks that you hold on to the children’s letters until they’re old enough to understand what they might mean; but after today, what you do with them will be up to you.”
Piling each paper in two separate stacks, he explains the ones that have already been signed by Haley and the ones that’ll need to be signed by us. She’s already terminated her parental rights, and because she chose us and had everything in order after meeting us the first time, things shouldn’t take too long to make it official. After we sign on all of these dotted lines, these children will be legal, Kennedy’s. They’ll be ours. Our family. I sign each one like my pen is on fire and Kingsley does the same.
It doesn’t take near as long as it did the day we star
ted all this with Haley at Murphy’s office, but still, there are a lot of papers to go over. Sometimes Kingsley takes a break and tends to the babies and other times; I get up to get one while he signs his stack. It’s a pain in the ass, but looking at our little babies, it’s one hundred percent worth it.
“Knock-knock” The same nurse from before peaks her head in. “Visitor’s!” She says, opening the door for Wade and his partner Cruz.
“Fuck” It takes me a second to realize that whispered curse came from Murphy. He was avidly avoiding eye contact with anyone while shuffling papers and putting them back into his bag.
“Holy shit, you guys have babies!” Wade smiled, coming further into the room to meet the babies. He shook Kingsley’s hand and gave me a nod before tip-toeing to the bed and meeting Wyatt and Gracie. Everyone loved their names and said that it suited them perfectly. I had to admit, I thought so too. If Kingsley had had his way, we’d have named them Beatrice and Brutus or something. Silly man.
“Cruz, this is our adoption specialist, Murphy Cruz and our friend Wade. Guys, this is Murphy Kinzer, the man behind the paperwork that gives us our babies.” I smile, introducing everyone.
“Mr. Kinzer,” Wade nods politely, holding Gracie with ease. He looks good with a baby; I should snap a picture and send it to Foster. I don’t think twice, snapping one and sending it immediately. I swear, something about hot guys with babies, I’m a lucky man.
I noticed that Cruz didn’t say anything and Murphy seemed to be studiously ignoring him as well. There was a story there, and judging by the scowl on Cruz’s face, I’d love to know what it’s about. Kingsley seemed to notice me staring and shot me a look that said to knock it off. He’s not impressed with my matchmaking skills, although I’m positive I’m better at it than he thinks. I mean, I did help Wade and Foster get together after all!
