“Maybe I should,” he conceded right before he kissed me and then scooped me up by my ass and carted me backwards, depositing me on giant bed. He followed me down, covering my body with his.
“I’m at a disadvantage. You have on more clothing than me,” I managed to force out breathlessly while he kissed my neck and shoulder. My hands shoved his shirt up, seeking out his skin.
“Not a problem,” he growled against the curve of my neck.
One hand slipped between us and made quick work of the button and zipper on his jeans, and then we were both furiously shoving them, along with his boxers, down. I could already tell this wasn’t going to be like last night, or even this morning.
It was going to be quick and rough, and I was so okay with that.
He stood and yanked me down to the edge of the bed by my hips so that my legs were dangling off. He tugged my thong to the side and dragged his middle finger through my center, spreading the wetness to my clit.
I sucked in a sharp breath and fisted the bedding. He had me in a near frenzy with a few masterful strokes, and then he grabbed my hips, lifted my ass and slammed inside me, filling me up and wrenching a deep moan from my belly.
All I could do was fist the bedding tighter and hang on for the ride, and what a ride it was. I think I saw stars at then end. I might have even passed out for a second or two.
“It’s a good thing I haven’t done my hair or makeup yet.” I murmured into the crook of his neck, arms wound around his back, breathing him in, not even caring that he’d collapsed on top of me. “They’d be ruined after that.” Hell, I was ruined after that.
With a chuckle he pushed himself up. I was reluctant to let go. I would have much preferred to lose the rest of the night in that bed with him.
“Tonight, after the party, I have a surprise,” he said, standing and righting his boxers and jeans.
“A surprise?” I sat up excitedly. “What is it?”
“You do know the meaning of the word?”
“Can I have a hint?”
“We’re not spending the night here again. That’s all I’ll give you.”
My features pulled into a pout, but James only laughed as he smoothed a hand over his hair, getting it to lay back down where I’d mussed it up. I could only imagine how my own looked. He bent down and pressed a chaste kiss to my lips. “Team James for the win.”
I laughed against his lips.
“After today the world is going to know you’re mine. That you were always mine.”
Something twisted in my stomach and my face must have given me away.
James’ face pulled into a frown. “What’s wrong?”
I bit my lip, not knowing how he was going to take what I was about to say. “I am yours. One-hundred-and-fifty percent yours . . .”
He took a step back. “Why am I sensing a but?”
“Can we just keep it to ourselves for a little while?”
His jaw clenched, and a shutter came down over his face. “I think Luis already knows. Along with your dad and Jayne. It’s a little late to keep it a secret.”
“I don’t mean them.” I stood and reached for his hand, taking it in mine. “I just—” I didn’t even know how to say what I was trying to say so that he would understand.
“Just what?”
“All this stuff with Hunter, and you—”
“This is about Hunter? You still want the world to think you two are a thing? For how long? I thought you guys got all the publicity you needed for the movie.”
“No, it’s not about publicity. It’s the opposite in fact. It’s nobody’s business who I’m with. I don’t want them turning this into something.”
He dropped my hand. “It’s nothing then?”
“No! God no. That’s not what I mean, James. This is everything. You know that. I just think we should wait until the time is right before we make our relationship public.”
“Until then I just pretend to be the bodyguard pining after you like a bad joke? Until when? When is the time going to be right?”
“I don’t know. Soon. Once we’ve had a little bit of time to ourselves without the rest of the world weighing in.”
“Wake up, Riley. They’ve been weighing in. They’re never going to stop, but I don’t give a shit. I’ve gotten over the fact that I’ll be giving up my privacy to be with you. That my family will be shoved back into the spotlight, my sister especially. I’m willing to deal with that. For you. You had no problem with our relationship being public gossip fodder when it benefited you. So why do you want to hide it now?”
“Not hide it. Just not announce it yet. How’s it going to look if I have you on my arm tonight, and last night I spent most of it on Hunter’s?”
“Like last night and every night you were with him was a fucking publicity stunt, but I’m the one you’re with.”
I shook my head. “That’s not how they’re going to see it. It’s going to look like I’ve been playing both of you, stringing you along. They’re going to say nasty things about me and try to make you the fool. It doesn’t matter that most of the world is on Team James. The tabloids aren’t going to be nice, because happy endings don’t sell nearly as well as scandal, and I’d just like to avoid as much of that as possible. Wait just a little while for the Hunter thing to blow over, for people to realize we were never together, that it was only for the movie, and then—”
“Un-fucking-believable.”
“What?” I cried.
“I thought you were past giving a shit about what other people thought.”
“I am. I just don’t want to be painted the next Taylor Swift, who falls in love with a new guy every other week. Sure, right now people are cheering on Team James, but they’ll just as quickly turn on me. They’ll say I wrecked Hunter’s relationship, and then strung him along and broke his heart. They’ll turn this whole thing into something ugly.”
“It doesn’t fucking matter when we do it, people are going to talk shit. It’s what people do. Fuck them. They can’t turn this into something ugly unless you let them.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No. I think I fucking do, Riley. You’re still scared. It’s easier for you to live a lie, to pretend than it is to just be your fucking self and let anyone see it, so damn afraid what they’ll say about you if you’re not their perfect little darling.”
“No, it’s not just me. I’m trying to protect you too.”
“I don’t need your protection, Riley. I just needed you to be an adult. To give more of a shit about me, about us, than your fucking image. You don’t even see that you sound just like Luis and Angela.”
Ouch. I winced.
“You can’t even deny it. What’s worse, I can’t even tell if this is your idea or theirs. You’re such a good little puppet.”
“That was low,” I whispered.
“No. Low is having the woman you love tell you she wants to keep you her dirty little secret because it’s inconvenient for her right now.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Sure the fuck how it sounds.” He turned to leave.
“Wait, can we please just talk about this some more?”
“No. You’ve got a party to get ready for, and nothing else I have to say to you right is going to make either one of us feel better. I fought for you, Riley. I put up with Luis and Hunter and all of your shit, because I knew your job mattered to you, but I’m fucking done. If I’m still coming in second to your career, then you don’t feel what I feel.”
I stood there and watched him walk out of my room. How could everything be so perfect one minute and fall to shit the next? Nothing I said had come out right. I fucked it up. I fucked it up big time. I sank to the floor and leaned my head back against the bed.
I couldn’t stop the first tear that fell. Or the second. Or third, or any of the tears after that.
That’s how Jayne found me. A pitiful mess on the floor.
“Riley!” she gasped, “What’s wr
ong? What happened?”
I wanted to tell her, but I couldn’t bring myself to. I swiped at my eyes and picked myself up. “Nothing. I’m fine. Just feeling emotional today because my mom isn’t here.”
“Oh, Ri.” She grabbed my hand and squeezed it and it almost felt like she was my best friend again. “You know, you could just blow off the party. I could sneak you out of here.”
I loved her for saying that. “We both know I can’t do that.”
“I know,” she said solemnly, “but I’d still do it for you.”
“Thank you. Will you help me finish getting ready? I’m going to need another mask for these puffy eyes, and I’m sure I’m all blotchy.”
“Of course.”
I walked over to the mirror at my vanity and cringed when I saw how wrecked I looked. The combination of rough sex and crying hadn’t done me any wonders. I dropped dejectedly onto the chair. I just had to get through this stupid party and hope that I got a chance to talk to James and make things right before the night was over. I’d apologize and tell him what an idiot I was. He’d forgive me and maybe we’d still get to that surprise.
Jayne took it upon herself to curl my hair and pin it back while I touched up the polish on my toes where it had smudged and applied the matching nearly nude shade of pink to my fingernails.
Despite how normal it was having her here, I couldn’t help but feel the lingering tension that remained between us. As much as I’d hoped we’d just be able to move past it, I knew I couldn’t until we talked.
I struggled to find a place to start, instead letting silence fall between us as I focused on smearing a dusky shimmery powder over my eyes while Jayne scrolled through her phone. We were in the same room but very far away from each other.
“Jayne.”
She glanced up at my reflection in the mirror.
“Did you really think I took those drugs and wrecked my car?”
Her chest deflated as she blew out a heavy breath. “I don’t know what I thought, Ri. I didn’t want to believe it, but you’d been so distant and acting weird. You were freaked out and stressed and I knew you were desperate to break out of your good girl image. You weren’t talking to me like you used to, and Luis, well . . . I shouldn’t have listened to him, but it just looked so bad. I should have had more faith in you. I let you down. I’m so sorry.”
I thought about what she said, letting my hand and the makeup brush fall away from my face. It hurt. It sucked that she’d thought that about me, but I sort of understood.
“It’s okay. If I’m honest with myself, I can’t really blame you. I was a little out of control and I did shut you out when I left for Europe. I didn’t mean to. I was just really wrapped up in my own stuff.”
“I get it. You’re going through a lot, with this movie, and a psycho stalker, and Luis being so controlling.”
“And James,” I added softly.
“Yeah. James,” she repeated with a little smirk.
“I was sort of falling in love with him, and when I say falling I mean that from the moment he showed up in California it’s felt like someone shoved me out of a plane without a parachute and I’ve had zero control ever since.”
“So it’s really real?”
“Really, really real,” I said trying not to cry all over again now that my eye makeup was almost finished.
She must not have caught on to my mood because she let out a tiny squeal and clapped her hands. “You have to tell me everything. It feels like we haven’t talked in so long. I need to hear about it all, what’s been going through your head, what it’s been like living with James, and fake dating Hunter, which I have to say even though that relationship wasn’t real, you’re still a lucky bitch.”
I laughed at the dreamy sound in her voice. It wasn’t like I hadn’t known she had a fat crush on Hunter. She used to blush so hard and get tongue tied around him on the set of Red Red Rose. Of course, who didn’t have a crush on him? But he’d been in a relationship then. With an evil hag, but that was beside the point.
Or was it?
Hunter needed a nice girl.
Someone sweet, and down to earth. Someone who understood this life but wasn’t after his money or fame. Someone with a backbone who could not only handle him, but handle the spotlight. Someone tough and smart.
Someone like Jayne.
Hmmm.
Wheels were spinning in my mind. Hunter was going to be here tonight. Maybe, just maybe, with a little nudge . . .
“What’s that grin for?” Jayne cut into my musings.
“Nothing. Just thinking.” I could make things right for all of us. It was going to be okay.
“Well spill. I need to hear all about it, and we only have an hour before you have to make your grand entrance downstairs.”
“Okay, but I could really use a cup of tea. I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed with everything right now”
“Alright. I’ll be right back with your tea, and then you’re spilling your guts.”
“Deal.”
Jayne wasn’t gone but a few minutes. “That was fast.”
“Caterers had hot water ready.” She handed over my favorite cup that had belonged to my mother, and I inhaled deeply. After a tiny sip to check the temp, I set the cup down and looked at Jayne, perched expectantly on the edge of her seat.
I decided if she wanted details, she was going to get them. The whole gory, messy tale, right up to our fight and the real reason I was crying when she walked in.
I was still telling her about what he’d said before he stormed out when we heard music filter up from downstairs and the beginnings of a party coming to life.
“Do you think he’s right, maybe just a little bit? That you’re scared?”
“I’m terrified, Jayne. Not for the reasons he thinks though. I didn’t worry when it was all pretend. Now that it’s not, what if it all ends up being too much for him? What if he doesn’t like having cameras in his face, in his family’s faces? If I share him with the world, what if I lose him? I just thought, maybe if we waited, I don’t know it’s stupid, but I just thought if we had a couple really good weeks together, keeping things on the downlow, he’d think it was worth it. That I was worth it.”
“You dummy, he already thinks you’re worth it. That’s so obvious. He knows what he’s getting into Ri.”
“You’re right,” I sighed. “I’m an idiot. I’ve just never felt anything this big and I panicked when I thought I might lose him.”
“So, drink this to calm your nerves,” she handed me the tea cup I’d hardly sipped from, “and tell him that.”
“I will.” I took a big drink, before setting it back down. Mmmmm, my insides were so warm, and I could feel the tension melting away from my body.
This tea is magical.
“He’ll have to listen when he sees you. You look so perfect,” she gushed, zipping up my dress. I stepped into my nude heels and stood in front of the full-length mirror. A dopey grin took over my face. The dress was pretty. Sooooo pretty.
“Thank you. I just feel so much better now.” I really did. I just knew in my heart that James was going to forgive me, and we’d laugh about my silly freak out and then we’d have more sexy fun times and this would be the most perfect birthday I’d ever had.
“That’s what I do.” She smiled at my reflection and I smiled back before doing a giddy little twirl that completely belied the fact that I had indeed turned twenty-six today. I couldn’t help it. There was something about finally being able to tell Jayne everything, and having her excited for me, and being in love, that made me feel like a bottle of champagne about to pop. Things finally felt right, like everything was exactly how it was meant to be for a change. I wanted to twirl and dance and shout and laugh, anything to release this marvelous feeling bubbling inside of me.
“Now, just wait here. Don’t go downstairs yet. I have to go get something.”
“What is it?”
She rolled her eyes. “Just wait here and you�
��ll see.”
“You and James and your damn surprises,” I giggled, dropping into the seat at my vanity, feeling a little light headed from the twirling. I was also so thirsty. I sipped the last drops from my cup before applying one last coat of color to my lips while I waited for whatever Jayne had in store.
It felt like she was gone forever. Hours and hours. Or maybe it had only been a few minutes. Minutes and hours were funny. I looked at the clock and watched the hands go round and round, and then they stopped, and raced around the other direction, faster and faster until the clock face was a swirl that made my brain dizzy.
“Woah,” I breathed, feeling strange and blinking at the clock several times until the swirling stopped and the second hand was ticking in the right direction again. “The tea really was magic,” I giggled. Maybe I just needed to eat something. It’d been a while since James had made me those blueberry oat pancakes.
They were so good.
James was so good.
I wanted to eat him up and lick him like I’d licked the syrup from my fingers. An airy laugh fluttered from my lips.
Were there fairies in the room? It sounded like giggling fairies.
I darted my gaze around, nearly falling off my stool as I reached out for the twinkling lights that danced in front of my eyes. I wanted to touch the fairies. They were so pretty. And fast.
They were too fast for me to catch. In front of me one second, and a blur the next. I rose unsteadily to my feet, holding the back of the chair for support. My vision danced out of focus for a second, and then the fairies were gone.
It made me sad. I wanted them to come back.
I wrapped my arms around myself to blanket against the sorrow crushing down on me. Why did the fairies go? Were they here for my birthday? Did they go downstairs to the party?
I wanted to go the party? James was at the party. I wanted to be where James was.
Why was I supposed to wait here?
I should be dancing and twirling with the fairies in my dress.
It was so soft. I ran my hands down the bodice and skirt, loving the way the material felt beneath my fingertips. I swayed back and forth, the skirt swooshing around my legs.
A Taste of Pink (Shades Book 4) Page 28
