Maybe she should rethink her goals. Instead of buying a house, maybe she should move out of Everson, think about getting an apartment over in Derbyville. It was only twenty miles away, but no one knew her, or cared about her one way or the other. And it would be convenient on the nights she taught her art classes.
Sometimes that sounded like heaven. She’d be close enough to commute to work, attend family dinners, and when the time came, close enough to spoil that baby once it arrived.
Yes, maybe downsizing was the way to go. She tried picturing herself in an apartment, but the only thing that came to mind was a sterile box with stark white walls, ugly all-purpose carpet, and avocado appliances.
But it would be her sterile box. And she could bring home a different man every night if she felt like it. No one would interfere. Not Lincoln, not Jake, not anybody. For some reason, that didn’t make her feel any better. It just made her feel lonely. Everyone had somebody it seemed. Her parents were joined at the hip. Linc and Dinah had each other and now the new baby. And of course, last but not least, Bradley had Libby.
Across the street, two doors down the porch light flicked on, and she watched Jake and Theo walk outside and take a seat on the front porch. From a distance they looked alike, but Marla Jean recognized the unruly curls falling on Jake’s forehead, could see the strong sturdy set of his shoulders. Lately, like a startled deer leaping into traffic, her heart would bound from her chest at the mere sight of him. Even from a distance. Damned inconvenient, adolescent thing for it to do. And she wasn’t prepared to examine what it meant.
The sound of their laughter and the clink of their beer bottles carried to her on the night air. As she watched, Jake jumped up and scampered across the yard after Sadie. “Come back here, you overfed fleabag.”
Humph. Even Jake had somebody now. Okay, so Sadie was a dog somebody and not a people somebody, but still. On top of that, Sadie would have been her dog somebody if Bradley wasn’t being such an ass.
Standing up, she threw the blanket off and hobbled down the steps. She could see the dog stop and roll over in the grass as Jake approached. Then he bent to pick her up, petting her at the same time he scolded her. “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times, you have to stay on the porch.”
Marla Jean grinned, and then yelled from her yard. “That’s it, Jake. Let her know who’s boss.”
Jake straightened holding the dog. “Well lookie here, Sadie, if it isn’t Marla Jean Bandy, your long-lost mother.”
She crossed the street diagonally and walked over to where they stood. “So, how are the two of you faring?” The puppy wagged her tail as Marla Jean scratched her on the head.
“We’re managing. Theo spoils her something awful though.”
“That’s good because the way things look now, she may be living with you permanently.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You better see if Bud Gailey’s still interested in the Brown house.”
“And why would I do that?”
“I came down from the clouds and realized I can’t afford a house right now. I’m thinking of finding an apartment instead. That’s the most practical thing to do.”
“But you love that house. I’m willing to work with you on getting the deal done.”
That’s exactly what she didn’t want him to do, go to extra trouble just for her. “Forget it, Jake. I’ve looked at all my options.”
“But you love that house,” he repeated, sounding frustrated on her behalf.
She sighed and wrapped her arms around herself in a hug. “I do, but if these last few years have taught me anything, it’s that you can’t always get what you want. I’ll live.”
“But what about Sadie?”
She felt an unexpected tightness in her chest as the puppy let out a playful woof. “We’ll see. Some apartments allow pets, don’t they?”
“Where’s this sudden apartment talk coming from, anyway?”
“My folks have decided to stay in Everson, and I’m happy about that, but not happy enough to keep living with them.”
“Okay.”
“And for the time being, an apartment is the more prudent choice, financially.”
Jake stared at her like he wanted to ask more questions, but he nodded his head instead. “Okay. I guess you know best.”
“Thanks, Jake. You don’t know how much I appreciate everything.”
“I didn’t really do anything, but you’re welcome.”
Marla Jean wanted to change the subject. “Have you talked to Linc recently?”
“Not for a couple of days.”
“Then I guess you haven’t heard his big news. But I should probably let him tell you.”
“Oh no you don’t, missy. Spill.”
She grinned. “Okay, I’m too excited to keep it to myself, anyway. Linc and Dinah are going to have a baby. They just found out today.”
“A baby?” Jake’s smile lit up the night, and then he shook his head in wonderment. “Linc, a father. Hell, I bet he’s about ready to bust a gut.”
“He’s over the moon, he’s so excited. Dinah, too.”
“Who can blame them? I’ll have to take Linc to lunch tomorrow to celebrate.”
Theo walked down from the porch. “What are we celebrating?”
“Marla Jean’s going to be an aunt.”
Marla Jean smiled at Theo. “I plan to spoil her rotten, too.”
“Her?” Theo asked.
She shrugged. “Or him. It’s too soon to know.”
“Well, that is good news. Would you like to join us for a beer?” He looked at her hopefully.
She glanced at Jake. He hadn’t echoed Theo’s invitation. In fact, he looked uncomfortable at the idea.
“Thanks, Theo, but I better call it a night. Tomorrow’s a long day.”
“What about Saturday night, then? You want to catch a movie?”
She couldn’t think of any good reason to say no. Theo was amusing and uncomplicated. “Sure, that sounds like fun.”
He smiled. “Great, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Sounds good.” She allowed herself one more scratch between Sadie’s ears and backed away from the brothers, who stood side by side. “You boys behave, okay?”
“Might as well if you’re set on leaving,” Theo said with a wink. “Night, Marla Jean.”
Jake didn’t say anything, just stood holding Sadie in his arms. As she crossed the street, she glanced over her shoulder to find him watching her with an odd expression on his face—an expression that matched her mood exactly. She’d say he looked forlorn.
As Marla Jean disappeared inside her house, Jake handed the puppy to his brother. “Take Sadie, will you? I’ve got something to do.” Without waiting for a reply, he climbed in his truck and backed out of the driveway. Once he got out of the neighborhood, he headed for the country roads that led out of town.
He didn’t have anything he needed to do. He just needed to get away. He didn’t want to sit and listen to Theo wax poetic about his pending date with Marla Jean. Okay, so Theo didn’t wax poetic. But he didn’t want to sit in the same room with him and witness the smug, self-satisfied attitude that would radiate from his pores because of his pending date with Marla Jean, either.
He pressed down on the accelerator, but he couldn’t outrun the restless, sour feeling crawling around in his stomach. And it wasn’t because Theo was taking Marla Jean to a movie. Not really.
It was more complicated than that.
The lights of the city faded away until dark silhouettes of tall trees lined the sides of the road. Slowing down, he turned down the driveway to the old Brown house. He pulled to a stop in front of it and sat with both hands on the steering wheel staring at the shadowed structure. Marla Jean wasn’t going to live here, and that wasn’t right.
Because she loved this house.
Okay, so he needed to stop saying that, but she did. If it was about money he’d let her pay whatever she could afford. Bu
t he knew she’d be too proud to accept that offer, so he’d bitten his tongue and kept the suggestion to himself.
Why the hell did it matter so much? It shouldn’t, damn it. She was a grown woman, as she liked to remind him at every turn. And if she’d decided to live in an apartment instead, then so be it. The moon peeked through the trees, barely illuminating the lifeless house.
Whacking the steering wheel in frustration, he got out of the truck and stood looking up at the place. The sagging shutter on the front window drew his attention, so he went to the toolbox in the back of his truck for a hammer and a couple of nails. Holding the shutter even, he pounded the nails in place then stood back to examine his handiwork. It would have to do until he could do the repair properly.
The churning in his gut hadn’t gone away. Maybe it was time he examined the source of that as well. That would mean being honest with himself, honest about his true feelings for Marla Jean.
Since he’d been a teenager he’d felt responsible for the people in his life. His mother, his aunt, even Theo. He was determined to be as different from his father as possible, and taking care of the people he cared about was the most obvious way to do that. It defined him, for better or worse, shaped him into the man he was today.
For a while he’d been able to convince himself that Marla Jean fell into the same category. Linc’s little sister. An old friend—nothing more. And he’d wanted to believe he could tuck her safely away in this house, this shelter, and tuck his growing feelings for her away at the same time. He hadn’t thought it out so clearly before this very minute, but he couldn’t hide from the truth any longer.
He knew he wanted to protect her. But he’d always protected her. Nothing new. Nothing to get excited about.
He knew he wanted her. She’d grown into a beautiful woman, and he was… well, he was a man, for Pete’s sake. Resisting had taken a heroic effort on his part. He mentally patted himself on the back, not that she seemed to appreciate what it had cost him.
It wasn’t just about that, though. He really liked her. He liked to talk to her, tease her, make her laugh. Hell, she made him laugh and that was something he needed a lot more of in his life.
And that’s when it hit him. The unvarnished truth. He’d fallen in love.
Damn it all.
With Marla Jean. Things like this weren’t supposed to happen to him. He’d lived his life in a way to insure they wouldn’t, couldn’t. But they had, and he did. Love her, that is. He sat down heavily on the porch steps like he’d taken a sledgehammer to the forehead.
What the hell was he supposed to do now? He didn’t have a clue. Nothing had changed, yet everything was different. They were still the same people. And he was still all wrong for her. Love hadn’t magically transformed him into the man she deserved. He rested his head against the screen door and looked up at the night sky like the distant stars might provide some kind of answer. After a while, he pushed himself up from the steps and walked to the back of his truck, hauled out the bucket of sky blue paint that rested like a promise in the bed of his pick-up and went to work.
Chapter Twenty-four
After putting in a full day at the barber shop Marla Jean jumped in her car and drove to Derbyville. Instead of going home to help her mother prepare the Thanksgiving sweet potato casserole and chop turkey giblets for gravy, she pulled into the parking slot for number 215 and climbed the stairs to her soon-to-be new apartment. She’d signed the lease, but hadn’t moved in yet. Passing her next-door neighbor, a tall fellow with brown hair and an easy manner, she smiled but didn’t stop to introduce herself.
Using her new keys, she let herself inside and stood looking around at the empty space with its stark white walls. She planned to take care of that little problem right away. She’d come prepared with a change of old work clothes and a kerchief to cover her hair. With a glance at the paint cans and drop cloths piled in one corner she hurried to the bathroom to change. She could hardly wait to get started.
Once she’d decided to make the move from her parents’ house, she hadn’t seen any reason to delay. When she announced her plan, her parents had been upset, feeling like they’d pushed her out of the house with their decision to stay in Everson. It had taken some doing, but she’d finally convinced them she’d wanted her own place for a while. In the end they’d supported her decision.
Derbyville proved to have tons of apartment complexes to choose from. She’d spent the last week and a half looking at every one of them. This one, the Waterview Gardens, finally won her over.
The view of the water was sadly lacking, and the gardens seemed to have gone missing, as well, but her second-floor two-bedroom unit had a balcony with a view of a tiny park and a big window that flooded the small kitchen with lovely morning light. Best of all, for an exorbitant deposit, they allowed tenants to have pets and, thank the lord, paint color on the walls.
She came out of the bathroom buttoning one of her dad’s old flannel shirts when a knock on the front door made her jump. She couldn’t imagine who it could be. Maybe one of her new neighbors stopping by to say hello.
Peeping through the peephole, something she never bothered with in Everson, she was surprised and a little breathless to see who waited on the other side. She opened the door.
“Hey Jake. What in the world are you doing here?”
Jake stood holding a pot of ivy, his tall form filling the doorway. He was dressed in jeans, a white T-shirt, and that worn brown leather jacket that had sent her nerve endings into overdrive at the football game. When he tipped his cowboy hat up and grinned like the devil, rivers of awareness flooded her veins. “Nice to see you, too, Marla Jean.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Come in. Come in. I wasn’t expecting anyone, that’s all.” His appearance made her feel rattled, so she tried to get the babbling under control. “How did you know where to find me?”
He handed her the plant, and his hand brushed hers. She could’ve been mistaken, but he seemed to make a point of lingering over the touch. “Lincoln gave me the address. What were you trying to do? Sneak out of town and leave us all behind?”
Fiddling with the yellow ribbon tied around the pot, she felt oddly moved that he’d sought her out, and on top of that, brought her a plant. It was certainly a step up from a single cowboy boot.
Walking into the kitchen she set the plant on the counter. “Of course not. Things have been crazy busy, and I wanted to get settled before I announced anything.”
He followed her into the kitchen, capturing her with his probing gaze. “This was kind of sudden, wasn’t it?” He seemed to have something on his mind.
“I told you I was thinking about getting an apartment.”
“But here? In Derbyville? I never expected you’d leave Everson.”
She slid past him and walked back to the living room, needing to escape the close quarters of the kitchen. He could unsettle her just by standing too near. “I haven’t really left Everson. I’ll be at the barber shop every day. But I decided a little distance was a good idea.”
Again he followed her, closing the space between them. “Distance from what? The people who care about you?”
She met his gaze head on this time. “Sometimes all those people who care about me make it hard to breathe.”
His voice grew gentle. “Is this about Bradley and Libby’s wedding?”
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t dream of giving them that much power over me, but I’ll admit I won’t be sorry to steer clear of the fuss this weekend.”
“That wedding is turning into a circus.” He sounded disgusted. “If I was in your shoes, I’d be tempted to run away, too.”
She stuck her chin out. “I prefer to think I’m sashaying into a bright new future.”
“Sashaying?” he asked with a grin.
She grinned back. “Sashaying, skipping, merrily row, row, rowing my boat—whatever you want to call it.”
“I’m relieved to hear that.” He smiled like he meant it.
/>
“And I haven’t told you the best part?”
“What’s that?” He stuffed his hands in his back pockets and rocked back on his heels.
“I put down a pet deposit, so I can take Sadie off your hands as soon as I’m settled.”
“Oh.” He sounded surprised, and a little uncertain. “Well, that’s good. I’ll feel better picturing you here with Sadie instead of picturing you here all alone.” He turned away from her, spotted the paint cans stacked along the wall, and then reached over and tugged the end of the kerchief on her head. “Were you about to paint? I know my way around a paint bucket if you’d like a hand.”
She touched her scarf and looked down at her tattered jeans, realizing for the first time that she looked like someone who’d gone clothes shopping in the nearest dumpster. Oh well, he’d seen her in worse over the years, and the idea of having his help, having him here alone with her in this place had its appeal. Who was she kidding? It had a lot of appeal. “I’d be pretty silly to turn down help from an expert like you. But you aren’t exactly dressed for it.”
He held up a hand and headed for the door. “Never fear. I have work clothes in my truck. I’ll be right back.” And with a wink, he was gone.
Jake ran to his truck, rummaging around in the back for his work clothes. When he decided to show up on her doorstep with nothing but a lousy plant for an excuse, he hadn’t examined his motives too closely. But helping her paint her apartment gave him a legitimate reason to stick around. She seemed determined to start a new chapter in her life, and he couldn’t blame her. But he was also going to make damned sure she knew he’d be around if she needed anything. Maybe that wasn’t the whole story, but it would do for now. He grabbed a roll of painter’s tape and headed back upstairs.
She thought her skin might burst open like a ripe melon. If he brushed past her again, reached around her. If he placed his hands on her waist to scoot her out of his way. If he kept touching her, she was going to fly apart and flutter to the ground in a million confetti pieces. For two hours they’d painted, side by side, but he was faster, taller, knew what he was doing, so he worked around her, through her, surrounding her with his long arms and tall legs and the feel of his solid chest against her back. Fleeting touches, barely there and then gone. His sleeve against her arm. His breath against her hair. Nothing substantial. Nothing to make a federal case about. But her body didn’t seem to agree.
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