by JJ King
Each tugged, for their own reasons. I could only assume what those were. Whatever they were, they were pissing me off.
I pulled my arms sharply into my chest, freeing myself from both their grips, and turned my back on Dimitri to check on Chase.
The savage growl that ripped from Dimitri made my heart squeeze painfully.
Blood dripped from Chase’s eyebrow, which had suffered a cut during the brawl.
“Are you alright?” I asked, stepping closer, and raised a hand to brush his forehead. “You’re bleeding.”
His breath came in pants and his eyes, dark and furious, shifted from me to over my shoulder as he fought to regain control.
“I’m fine,” he said between clenched teeth. “What the fuck, man?”
His voice was raw, but I could hear the edge of hurt. It twisted at my stomach.
I pivoted to glare at Dimitri, whose eyes were so black they made him look like a demon. It sent a shiver up my spine.
“What are you doing?” I lifted my hands and raked them through my hair to hold my head. I didn’t understand any of this. “Why did you do that?”
I took a step towards him but stopped when his entire body went stiff. I exhaled slowly and focused on not clawing his eyes out.
“Leave, Dimitri,” I hissed, hoping he would recognize the fury radiating from me and listen, for once. “Just leave.”
He shifted his gaze with what looked like Herculean effort from Chase to me and blinked, as if bringing me into focus. Just as I was about to scream at him to leave, his eyes widened and his pupils shrunk, revealing the depths of his irises. It threw me, that shift from animal to human, just long enough to make me pause and really look.
His body shook violently, from still contained rage or the adrenaline pumping through him. What I saw was someone on the edge of losing control, someone who’d pulled back from the darkness— but why?
For me, I realized in a moment of shocking clarity. This was all about me. I’d done this.
No. I blinked hard and shook my head, pushing away the self-deprecating thoughts that threatened my mind too often. I wasn’t responsible for the choices of others and this had been a choice.
I took another hesitant step towards him.
“He’s your friend,” I whispered, lifting my hands then letting them fall by my sides. “Why would you…”
I trailed off when he stepped forward and lowered his mouth to my ear. I barely heard Chase’s wild growl in response.
“I can’t stay away.” His whisper was ragged and filled with pain that tore at my chest. “I tried. I swear.”
He pulled away and squeezed his eyes shut but, before he did, I saw regret swimming in them.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured then shifted his gaze to Chase. “I’m sorry, man.”
He moved past me and where his body touched mine, fires lit. Then he stalked around the corner and disappeared into the crowd who parted like the Red Sea as he left.
I stared after him, fighting the urge to follow, to beg him to stay. The absurdity of it struck me in the chest like a blow. I pressed a hand over my heart, trying to ease the ache in there, but it only grew with each passing second.
A hand brushed mine and I turned to see Chase, staring after Dimitri, too. His face was a study in confusion, anger, and grief. I didn’t know much of their friendship but, from what I’d seen in those few brief moments, they’d seemed tight, more like brothers than casual friends.
I’d come between them. It wasn’t my fault. I’d be damned if I’d let myself take responsibility for that, but the undeniable truth was that they’d been just fine before me. Guilt didn’t always take rational thought into account.
I scanned the faces of the other students watching us, curiosity and the desire for gossip lighting their eyes. A thought tickled my mind, making me frown.
The population of Beta Wolf Academy seemed equally split down the center between female and male. Discounting the guys who preferred guys but adding in the girls who preferred girls, there were a lot of potential interests right here, even in this room, none of whom looked at me the way Lucian, Chase, and Dimitri did.
So, what was it about them and me that made us different?
If I really were in heat, wouldn’t everyone around me be affected by my scent? I understood it wasn’t typical to be entering first heat at this point in life, so meeting a female wolf in heat at University would be a novel experience. Yet, as I watched the crowd turn away and funnel back to the party, I couldn’t help but notice that nobody else was paying attention to me.
Except for Chase.
His fingers linked with mine and he gave a gentle tug that turned me away from the crowd to face him. I tilted my head up to look at him and noticed a small trickle of blood on his temple. My heart squeezed tight.
I lifted my fingers to his face, skimming them over his swelling and swiftly forming bruises. He was so beautiful, even moments after a fight, it nearly stole my breath. I cupped his cheek in my palm, and he leaned into me, closing his eyes for a moment.
When he opened them, they were that beautiful golden color once more, and they were looking down at me with a different kind of need, one that filled my throat with emotion and brought a sad smile to my lips.
“Not quite the date you had in mind?” I murmured, rising up onto my toes to flutter my lips over his. A soft warmth thrilled through me, so different from the blazing heat of before.
He gathered me into his arms and rested his chin atop my head.
“Not quite,” he whispered into my hair. “I’m really sorry about that.”
His voice broke on the apology.
I pulled back just enough to look up at him and shook my head.
“Don’t apologize. Don’t ever apologize for him.” I exhaled my frustration. “I don’t know what’s wrong with him, but he had no right to touch you like that.”
Chase stared down at me then a ghost of a smile lifted his lips. “I think he’s jealous.”
I scoffed. “Why would he be jealous? He acts like he can’t stand me half the time and, quite frankly, I’m not sure I even like him. He’s a bit of an asshole, you know.”
Chase laughed and the sound of it lifted my heart.
“I can’t argue with that—he can definitely be an asshole. But he’s never been one to me or Lucian, and we’ve been friends since the first week we got here, three years ago.” His brow furrowed. “If I could just talk to him.”
Fresh guilt rose up inside me. Three years of friendship, torn apart because I’d decided to attend Beta Wolf Academy. Like it or not, I was at the center of this controversy. We were connected, the four of us, in a way I didn’t know how to explain. I wasn’t sure anyone would be able to explain it, but it was real.
How else could I explain the fact that three guys, from different walks of life, could become best friends and then all be intensely, irrationally attracted to the same woman? In our world, soul mates were the foundation of relationships. It was rare for people our age to find their soul mates, so wolves tended to just have fun and explore their sexuality until The One came along. I’d read papers on it the night before, written by highly educated wolves, but nothing I’d read had even mentioned what we were experiencing. My going into heat theory wasn’t holding up.
More confused than ever, I decided to put the questions aside for the moment and just let myself enjoy being with Chase.
It was a bit startling, this feeling of contentment that was floating through my body, calming me after the storm Dimitri had created. I’d only just met Chase. We hadn’t had the chance to talk at all yet, so our connection had been purely physical. It felt like something more, now, something that tugged deep inside me and made me want to get to know him outside of our hormones.
I slid my hand into his and lifted it to my lips, watching the way his eyes lit up as my mouth grazed over the back of his knuckles. The instant lust that had flared to life between us was still there, but it was tempered now. I smiled
and crooked my head.
“I believe you still owe me a dance,” I murmured, peering up at him through my lashes.
He chuckled and moved our linked hands to his mouth.
“I think you’re right,” he said.
I gasped in delighted surprise, when he placed a hand on my hip, spun me out then pulled me back as quick as a flash. I was laughing when he kissed me then pulled me towards the dance floor.
We danced to every song that came on, laughing and spinning, oblivious to the world outside. I laughed so hard my cheeks began to ache. When the music switched to a slow song with rich melodies and soulful lyrics, Chase pulled me into his arms, holding me tight as he began to sway.
“It’s even better, you know,” he murmured, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“What’s even better?” I asked, knowing full well what he meant. I just wanted to hear it from his lips and see it in his eyes, an echo of what I was feeling. I’d told Emily earlier that I understood what kind of guy he was, but I’d been dead wrong. He might be a playboy. With those golden curls and eyes and shoulders that made me feel delicate and feminine, there was no doubt he made girls and guys go weak in the knees. But there was a lot more to him than what most people saw.
Maybe it was foolish to believe that what we had was different, but there was nothing usual about the way we were reacting to each other, so why would I believe, even for one second, that he would be the same guy with me that he’d been with others?
I wasn’t stupid. I knew hormones and physical attraction and perfect nights could influence perception. I wasn’t about to become a love stricken little girl with hearts in her eyes who thought that they could change the guy. I didn’t want to change Chase; I just wanted to get to know the guy who lived beneath the façade. There was more to him than he showed most people. He’d given me a glimpse tonight and awoken a new desire in me.
I smiled up at him, soft and knowing, and pulled his head down to kiss his beautiful lips.
His mouth roved lazily over mine as his hands splayed over the small of my back, moving in slow circles that hitched my breath and raised the heat in the room degree by degree. Or maybe it was just us. I took a playful bite of his lower lip.
“This,” he whispered, his voice gritty with growing emotion.
He lifted a hand to the back of my neck, tangling his fingers in my hair to angle my mouth just so. He brushed his lips over mine, the barest whisper, like butterfly kisses. I sighed into his mouth and accepted his breath back into mine. We fell into sync, our hearts beating in time, our breath shared, and for one perfect moment I felt as if I knew his soul.
A throat clearing to my left, and the familiarity of it pulled me out of the moment. I closed my eyes, savoring our last moment alone, and turned to look at Lucian.
Chase rested his lips against my temple, keeping his arms wrapped around me, and spoke to his friend.
“Hey,” he said simply.
Lucian’s gaze travelled between me and Chase, not missing a detail. I saw a muscle work in his jaw before he spoke and had to tamp down the nerves that fluttered to life in my stomach at the glimpse of jealousy in his eyes.
Chase saw it too and tightened his grip around my shoulders.
“It’s Dimitri, man,” Lucian said, fixing his dark eyes on Chase. “He’s not doing great. He’s torn up about it.”
He nodded towards the bruises that were already starting to heal on Chase’s face.
“He should be torn up about it,” Chase said, letting go of me to face Lucian. “He went full psycho on me. Sucker punched me like we haven’t been best friends forever.”
He clenched his teeth.
“Shit, Chase.” Lucian sighed, then glanced at me, then away. “He just lost it for a minute. We should talk, the three of us.”
He didn’t look at me this time.
Dread replaced the butterflies in the pit of my stomach, weighing me down so that I felt like I would never move again. I understood what was happening; I knew that they needed to come to terms on their own without me there to muddy the waters. I took a step back, distancing myself even though it cost me to do so. Two sets of eyes turned to look at me.
“You guys need to go to him,” I said, then chewed on my bottom lip to stop my eyes from filling with tears.
There were enough emotions; they didn’t need me tearing up. I pasted on a semi-believable smile and nodded.
“Go.” I tilted my chin towards the stairs and widened my eyes, showing them that I was serious. “I’ll be fine, promise.”
When Chase frowned and reached for my hand, I shook my head. “I’ll see you later.”
He stared for a moment, confusion darkening his eyes as his hand curled and fell to his side. Then he nodded and offered me a crooked smile that made my heart skip. “Later.”
They walked away, glancing back only once before they disappeared through the doorway that led up the stairs and, as I lost sight of them, I felt my heart break.
Chapter 10
I nearly jumped off my desk chair onto the floor at the sound of my phone signaling a text message.
My cell lay on the bed, half covered by unkempt blankets, tossed back after a long night of sleeping fitfully. I lunged for it, disregarding all self-respect, and pressed my fingers over the numbers of my password, then sagged onto the bed in disappointment.
It was from Rose. A little note to check in on me, probably at the prompting of Dr. Bennett. I read it quickly, then blinked in surprise, and read it again.
Hey, Lexi. How are classes? Hope you’re feeling more comfortable at Beta Wolf Academy than you were the first week of school. If your social calendar isn’t too busy next month, perhaps you could fit Liam and I in for a date when we come visit. Let me know and we’ll plan a girl’s night. Rose XOXO
“Huh,” I mumbled, more than a little surprised that Rose and Liam would be making a trip just to visit me. I wondered if they weren’t bringing along someone else, one of the other girls from the mountain to see campus. The thought lifted my spirits and brought a smile to my lips.
Of the girls I considered my family, seven of us were around the right age to attend university, not that anyone older couldn’t. Rose had taken us under her wing after she’d helped free us, but it often struck me that she was just as much adrift in this new world as I was. Of course, being the mate of a potential Alpha, she wasn’t really in the position to be able to leave all her responsibilities to attend school. So, she’d made it her personal quest to help each and every one of us prepare for something more, something that gave us hope.
For me, that was attending university. I hadn’t had any preconceptions about which one I’d wanted to attend. I’d asked only to not be sent to the most prestigious academy, since I had the feeling that I would feel even more unnatural than I usually did in that kind of rarefied social setting.
Hey! Nice to hear from you. Of course, I’d love to see you and Liam next month. I shall add you to my social calendar. Are you, by any chance, bringing one of the other girls?
I hit send and then, in a much better mood, went back to my desk to finish the assignment I’d been working on. Rose rarely answered text messages right away, so I wasn’t prepared to wait and stare at the screen as I’d been doing much too often in the two days since leaving the party Friday night.
I shook off the doubts plaguing my mind and scanned the last paragraph I’d written on ethical philosophy. It sounded pretty good, I thought, as I fixed a little typo and flipped to the next page of my textbook.
Another ding, then another, surprised me again. I tapped my phone screen and read.
Alyssa has been asking about some courses and we're trying to talk her into starting in the fall.
Do you mind?
Did I mind? Of all my sisters, Alyssa was the quietest, the most studious. It made sense that she would want to attend the University. It was just kind of surprising that she would want to attend in person. She’d always been so withdrawn and shy, ev
en around us girls. I wasn’t sure if my being here would help or hinder her chances of making it.
I typed out a careful reply, conscientious that my response might tip Rose’s opinion one way or the other. Not that she would make the decision for Alyssa. She’d actually been pretty forceful about putting ownership of our decisions in our hands. In her words, we’d spent our entire lives with no control, so it was time to take the bull by the horns and choose our paths.
I just hadn’t expected Alyssa to choose my path.
Alyssa has always been really shy. Do you think she’s ready?
Three dots appeared on my screen. I waited for the response this time and got it almost immediately.
She thinks she is. But, if she isn’t, there’s no shame in waiting a year, right?
I shook my head and murmured, “No there isn’t,” before realizing no one could see me. My fingers flew over the screen as I typed out my response.
Of course. But I’m sure she’ll be fine. Did she ask about me?
This time the dots appeared and disappeared and never came back. I sighed and laid the phone down on my desk, knowing Rose could’ve been called away for any reason. She might not get back to the conversation for some time. There was no point waiting and staring at the screen.
I clicked out of our conversation and froze with my forefinger hovering over the screen as I realized where that second ding had come from. I had a text from Chase.
I read it. Then I read it again. Then I stood up and began pacing the room, still holding my phone in my hand as I read the message over and over.
Hey, Lexi. Just wanted to see if you’re alright. Things are… weird right now, but okay. We’ll see you soon. Just give us time.
I chewed my lip, not stopping even when I tasted blood, and stared at the words he’d written.
We’ll? Us?
He wasn’t just talking about himself. They were together, all three of them or, at least, two of them. Things were weird, he’d said, but how weird? Had they all talked? Had they sat down and discussed the fact that they were all super attracted to me and that I reciprocate those feelings? He’d said they were okay, too, but what did that mean?
