And me. His dragon heart pounded viciously at the thought of seeing Irina again.
Don’t worry, I won’t forget about finding your human heart and restoring it to you before you go.
I wasn’t worried about that. I meant you aren’t facing Irina alone. I’ll be at your side. I may not be able to shift, but I can still call on my dragon’s fire and speed. I’m still faster and stronger than a human, and Irina will have a hard time defeating both of us at once.
What do you mean you can call on your dragon’s fire? She turned to face him, a tiny frown etched between her eyes. Why didn’t you use that against me when you tried to kill me?
I live for the day when we can stop bringing that up in our conversations. He gave her a little smile. I can’t breathe fire anymore, but I can use it to heat my blood to a degree that would cause burns on humans.
When did you figure this out?
When the statue fell on top of you in the water. Everything in me wanted to shift so I could smash it to pieces and rescue you. I was so . . . Terrified. Furious. He couldn’t quite find the right word for how it had felt to watch Lorelai go under the water and not come back up. My dragon’s fire raged, and when I stepped into the river, the water sizzled against me.
You didn’t burn me when you took my hands.
I backed away from the dragon’s fire. I won’t hurt you, Lorelai. I’d die first.
You’re willing to sacrifice yourself for everyone you care about.
He held her gaze and tried not to think about how much the understanding and admiration in her thoughts eased the sharp edge of disappointment he remembered in his father’s eyes.
Her eyes reflected the starlight as she looked at him, her shoulder leaning against his. And to think that you said you weren’t even a very good prince.
I . . . what? When? He looked at the images in her thoughts and saw himself standing before her after he’d nearly killed her in his dragon form, begging for her mercy for Eldr.
You think you’re a poor substitute for your older brother. That no matter what you do, you’ll still be a disappointment to your father. Compassion softened her voice, but there was iron beneath it. I think you’re blind. You’re a natural leader. All those pranks you somehow convinced the academy’s top students to pull with you? All those friends of yours willing to follow you into the jaws of death without you even asking them to? It’s because they know what I know—that you have the kind of bottomless strength and loyalty that will always put others first at the expense of yourself. You are exactly the kind of king Eldr needs right now.
The fierce tenderness that swelled in his chest when he was with her expanded, pressing against Kol’s skin until it almost hurt to be so close to her. I never told you about my father’s disappointment in me. Or about my friends following me to Ravenspire without me asking.
She bit her lip. I’ve seen your thoughts, even the ones you didn’t mean to share.
I’ve seen yours too. He met her eyes. For example, I know that you think you’re too serious, but that you wouldn’t change it because it will help you be a good queen. I know you miss growing up with your mother to take care of you. And I know you hate the good memories you have of the time you spent with Irina after your mother died.
It’s weird to know so much about each other when we aren’t even friends.
Who says we aren’t friends?
We hardly know each other.
He raised a brow.
I mean . . . we know each other better than we should for the time we’ve spent together, but we only know the big stuff.
The stuff that usually doesn’t come up in friendships for a long time. He bumped her shoulder again and gave her a smile. How about if we make up for that?
How?
By asking the questions that people usually ask when they want to get to know each other and don’t have the pesky benefit of a magical mental bond getting in their way.
She laughed. Fine. What’s your middle name?
He groaned inwardly. It’s Eilertolvanisk. His words were accompanied by the image of Master Eiler standing beside his father, smiling proudly while Kol took his first steps.
You were named after the headmaster who expelled you from the academy?
He sighed.
Ouch.
I know it. What’s your middle name?
Rosalinde Tatiyana. Rosalinde for my father’s mother and Tatiyana for mine.
Favorite food?
Strawberry tart cake. Yours?
Cheese. Every kind of cheese. He looked up at the carpet of stars above them and searched for another question. Another detail to round out what he knew of Lorelai. How did you get a gyrfalcon as a pet?
Sasha would peck out your eyes if she knew you’d just called her a pet. Lorelai grinned at him.
Then please keep that breach of bird etiquette to yourself.
She leaned back, her shoulder still brushing his, and stared at the sky. It was a few weeks after we’d run from the castle. There was a darkness beneath her words, and Kol didn’t have to look far to see images of her terror and grief when her plan to expose Irina fell to pieces and left her orphaned and homeless. We were staying with an old woman in the Falkrains who was doing her best to treat Gabril’s leg. I wasn’t supposed to leave the cabin, but Leo convinced me to sneak out one afternoon so we could explore the woods close by. Sasha was just a baby, and she’d fallen from her nest. Her wing was crushed.
I picked her up. She turned her hands over, palms facing up, and examined them as if she could still see the gyrfalcon lying there. I held her in my bare hands, and the magic was just there, waiting. I spoke an incantor, and my magic entered Sasha’s body and healed her.
And that’s why you share a mental bond with her?
She nodded. I took her back to the cabin because she would’ve died out there on her own. She was too little to hunt. That’s when Gabril decided I needed to start wearing gloves. He didn’t want my magic to touch anything else in Ravenspire in case it had been bespelled by Irina.
A wise man.
She smiled. Yes, he is. But enough about that. What’s your favorite memory?
He thought it would be impossible to find an answer, but a memory rose to the surface unbidden. He was six, standing on the field behind the academy, the rest of his class lined up to his right, receiving a ribbon for the best flight time out of all the first-year cadets. Father was smiling proudly, his hand on Kol’s shoulder, while his mother winked at him, her arm around Rag, who looked as superior and unimpressed as a nine-year-old could manage. Brig played at his mother’s feet, unconcerned with the honor her brother was receiving.
That’s a nice memory. She smiled at him.
It’s the one time I remember my father being proud of me.
She met his eyes. I’m sure he was proud of you far more often than you ever realized.
He shrugged as though her words didn’t matter, but he knew she could see the truth. So what’s your favorite memory?
An image of Lorelai as a child sitting outside on a blanket eating berries while a woman with Lorelai’s pale skin and brown eyes knelt behind her, braiding the princess’s long hair. A boy who looked remarkably like his sister slept on the blanket beside Lorelai.
Your mother and Leo? he asked, though he could already see the answer.
She nodded, and they sat in companionable silence listening to the ebony boughs creak gently while somewhere in the distance an owl hooted. Finally, she stirred restlessly, and he could already see the plans taking shape in her mind. Wake Gabril. Pack the tent. Destroy the intersection and spread the damage wide enough to prevent anyone from traveling to the capital until the road was repaired.
Before she could say the words, he stood and leaned down to offer her his hand. She took it and allowed him to pull her to her feet.
I’m glad we’re friends. Her tone was serious, her smile shy.
I am too. He watched her turn back toward the tent and let the warmth of t
heir friendship push against the whispers that wanted him to destroy her.
UNCORRECTED E-PROOF—NOT FOR SALE
HarperCollins Publishers
..................................................................
THIRTY
IT WAS TIME to make her next move against Irina. Lorelai’s pulse raced, and her stomach ached. Just days earlier, she’d provoked Irina by using magic and had nearly died, pinned underwater by a statue sent by the queen to kill her. There was no telling what spell would lash out or what creature would awaken and submit its heart to Irina’s this time.
Maybe the queen had been so weakened in her battle with Lorelai for control over Kol that they were no longer in danger from her. Or maybe she still had enough strength left for another terrifying fight.
Lorelai needed to be ready to defend herself and the others. She needed to be ready to run if necessary. And she needed Kol and Gabril to be ready to do the same.
Which meant she had to win an argument that had been simmering for almost two weeks.
“Before I destroy the roads, I’ve got one very important thing to take care of.” Lorelai locked eyes with Gabril as he hoisted his travel pack onto his back while Kol finished rolling up the tent in the silvery light of the stars.
“What’s that?” Gabril asked.
“Your leg.”
This should be interesting. Kol raised a brow and shoved the tent into its sack.
“I told you, you aren’t wasting your energy on me when you need it for Irina.” Gabril’s voice was firm, and a spark of anger flared in Lorelai’s chest.
“It wouldn’t be a waste of energy at all if I didn’t have to overpower your stubborn heart.” She stalked forward and stood toe-to-toe with him.
“How do you know that?” he demanded. “Every time you’ve healed someone, you’ve fallen into a deep sleep for hours—sometimes days!”
“Not when I healed Sasha.”
Hearing her name, Sasha swooped out of a nearby tree and perched on Lorelai’s shoulder. Stubborn human. Limp, limp, limp.
I’m trying to change that. Lorelai glared at Gabril.
Bribe with treat? Mouse? Rabbit?
No bribery. He’s going to bend to my will one way or the other. Lorelai lifted her chin and said to Gabril, “This is a stupid argument to have. I’m healing your leg.”
He stepped back. “No, you aren’t.”
“Gabril—”
“What happens if using magic on me incites a response from Irina, only you’re unconscious and can’t defend yourself?” He matched her glare with one of his own. “I’m not going to be the reason you die.”
“And I’m not going to be the reason you die!” She lifted her hands, and magic was already stinging her palms. “When I destroy those roads, Irina will attack. I have no idea what weapon she’ll use, but we have to be ready to fight or to flee. You can’t run, and I can’t be distracted worrying about you.”
“But—”
“This makes the most strategic sense.” She took a deep breath and forced herself to sound calm. “If you submit to me, the cost to my body should be minimal. If Irina attacks after I heal you, and for any reason I can’t defend myself, Kol can get me away from here.”
I don’t really think he’s going to like the idea of sending me off alone with you. He sleeps with a sword between us, you know. I’m not high on his list of people he trusts.
This isn’t about trusting you. This is about him trusting that I understand my limitations and my power.
You should tell him that. Kol hefted the tent’s pack onto his shoulders and nodded toward Gabril.
Gabril took a deep breath of his own. “I appreciate your concern, Lorelai, and I love that you want to help me. But even if I submit to this, and even if it doesn’t cost you physically, there’s a chance that Irina will realize you’ve used magic, and that she’ll retaliate before you’re able to destroy the roads. What then?”
She held his gaze. “Then I’ll use magic to destroy both the roads and whatever she sends at us. Or, if that’s not a possibility, we’ll flee and regroup, and I’ll find another way to do what I’ve set out to do. Either way, your leg will be healed.”
“Lorelai—”
“You need to trust that I know what I’m doing.” Her voice was firm. “If you can’t trust me in this, how can you trust me to face Irina or rule an entire kingdom?”
Good point, Kol said quietly.
Gabril remained silent for a long moment, his expression as stoic as ever, and then he wrapped his arms around her. Resting his chin on her head, he said, “You’re right, and that scares me more than I care to admit. I’m used to being the one who looks out for you, and knowing that I can’t help you win this fight is hard to swallow.”
She returned his hug and then stepped back, her hands wreathed in brilliant white light. “You’ll help me by being at full strength. And by trusting me to know what I’m capable of.”
He met her gaze and slowly wrapped his bare hand around hers, barely flinching as her magic licked his skin. “I trust you.”
“Then come on. We’re going to do this beside the intersection so that I can send your injury into the ground and give the command to destroy the road at the same time.”
Together the three of them left the copse of ebony trees behind and walked across a field of brittle brown grass with clumps of bushes that smelled like rot. Sasha flew overhead, scouting the immediate area for travelers, though few would use the road at night when visibility was so poor.
The road was wide and paved with stones worn smooth over time and constant use. It cut the field into four equal squares and met in the middle. Lorelai led them across the point where the roads intersected and into the southern half of the field.
She looked at Gabril and tried hard to sound like she wasn’t shaking inside at the thought of what Irina might send after them. “I’m going to take your injury into myself and then put it into the road. The second your leg is healed, I want you to run across the rest of the field into the Hinderlinde Forest. Kol and I will meet you there as soon as I’ve destroyed the roads.”
“I’m not leaving you.” There was no room for argument in his voice.
“Kol isn’t going to hurt me. Since we can communicate through our mental bond, he’ll be able to fight as an extension of myself. I don’t know what’s coming for us, or if I can convince the land to submit to me when it’s been owned by Irina for so long. If I can’t fight, Kol is faster than a human and—”
“This has nothing to do with the boy.” Gabril held up their joined hands, and his eyes glistened as he looked at Lorelai. “I can’t stop you from taking risks, and I don’t want to. This is what you’ve been working toward for years. But I’m not leaving your side, no matter what it costs me.”
You aren’t going to win this argument. Kol’s voice was steady, but she could see his fear of Irina’s tactics in the way his thoughts skipped from one awful possibility to the next.
I want him to be safe.
He’s your protector, and you’re his queen. You asked him to trust that you know what you’re capable of. Do you trust him the same way?
She did. This wasn’t about trusting Gabril—the man who’d sacrificed his time with his family, his leg, and his safety to protect the prince and princess. To raise them to be just, loyal, and able to fight for what was right. This was about doing everything she could to keep the last person she loved alive.
The ache of missing Leo became a sharp pain at the thought of losing Gabril as well. Her breath lodged in her chest like a stone, and a tremor shook her as she stared at the road before her and considered her choices.
She could walk away. She’d be safe, and so would Gabril. They could leave the country. Maybe go to Eldr and meet Brig. Stay at the castle with Kol. Forget Irina and all the pain that lay in the past like so much wreckage.
But if she did that, she condemned the people of Ravenspire to a terrible fate. She left Leo’s death,
her father’s death, and Gabril’s sacrifice unanswered. And Kol would still be bound by a collar Lorelai couldn’t remove. He’d still be missing his human heart. And Lorelai would live the rest of her days knowing that Ravenspire’s pain, Kol’s pain, were a responsibility she’d left behind.
Slowly, Lorelai straightened her spine and squared her shoulders, tightening her muscles until she no longer trembled at the thought of moving forward.
She could choose a different fate for herself, but she couldn’t live with the consequences. She’d face Irina, no matter the sacrifice. She’d take the hit, fight the battle, and do her part to isolate and weaken the queen. And she’d do it even though it might cost her the last person she loved.
She was so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn’t been paying attention to Kol’s, and she jumped a little when he slid his hand into her free one and twined his fingers through hers.
Thank you, he said simply, but she could see behind the words. She could see the future he wanted for himself, the kind of king he wanted to become, and how none of it was possible if he was forever chained to Irina.
She squeezed his hand and let go. Turning to Gabril, she said, “No matter what happens next, you stay alive. I don’t care what you have to do to accomplish it, but you still stay alive. That’s an order from your queen.”
Without waiting for a reply, she knelt, pulling Gabril down with her, their hands still joined. “Ready?”
“Ready.” Gabril sounded confident.
Ready.
Lorelai’s magic burned against her palms, and she felt Gabril’s heart surge to meet it. “Nakhgor. Find the bone that broke and mended poorly. Kaz`prin. Heal the break and send the damage through me and into the ground.”
The Shadow Queen Page 23
